Monday, August 9, 2010

The Laura Interview: Part One

Welcome, Minions, to the Blog Event of the Decade. Thanks to you and your votes and your enthusiasm, the notoriously reclusive Laura has agreed to let me interview her tonight- her first interview EVER. We shall be gentle.

“Laura, welcome to your first interview. It’s okay to admit that you’re nervous.”

She raises an eyebrow as she sprawls back, trying to get comfortable in the most uncomfortable of chairs. She eventually manages it by putting one foot up on the arm of my chair, the other foot lying across my left knee. She’s wearing unusual shoes.

“Continue,” she says.

“The first question is, I think, hugely important, and possibly the number one question the readers of this blog want answered: Do you possess a black coat?”

“Yes, I do,” she says. “It’s leather.”

We look at each other, and I get a sudden flash of fear that maybe all her answers will be that short, therefore making this the most awful interview ever. Oh dear God. I press on, refusing to let my enthusiasm dim.

“Before we get into the more complex questions,” I say, “let’s sort out a few things. Which Skulduggery book is your favourite?”

“Oh God,” she says. “I don’t know the names of them.”

I stare at her. “What?”

“I don’t,” she insists. “I think it comes from reading the books before they’re actually published, so they all kind of become this one big blur... Do you know what I mean?”

“Um,” I say. “Well, okay, I suppose it doesn’t help that when you do read them, I usually don’t even have a title ready.”

“Exactly. I know each of the books, obviously, it’s just I don’t know what the titles are.”

“Okay, so titles aside, which one is your favourite?”

I look at her. She looks at me. Eight seconds pass.

I lean closer, my voice dropping to a whisper. “Please say you like the books.”

“I love the books,” she assures me, laughing, “I love the books. Which one is my favourite?” She pauses again. “Which one has Paddy in it? The third one.”

“The Faceless Ones.”

“That’s it. I liked that one. I thought it was amazingly clever.”

“It was amazingly clever,” I nod.

“It was. The story was brilliant, and the fight scenes were fantastic.” She shifts in her chair, adjusting her feet.

“You’re wearing wonderful slipper type things,” I say. “They’re... what are they? They’re not slippers, they’re not boots...”

“They’re bootie slippers,” she grins.

“They’re pink. And they have bobbles.”

“They’re tassels, and they’re not pink. They’re pink and grey, and they’re very... festive.”

“And they’re very, very, very... dirty.”

She laughs again. “They’re my outdoor slippers.”

“Where do you wear these?”


“Like... in nightclubs, or...?”

“Nooo... Like, when I’m at home, and it’s dry outside, I don’t mind going out to the car or something. I won’t go out when it’s been raining or I’ll get, you know... wet feet.”

“They’re so cute.”

“And Ruby has pulled the tassels off the right one, so I only have tassels on the left one.”

“Aww, the bobbles.”

“They’re tassels.”

“Tassels, sorry. But they have little bobble things at the ends.”

“They’re tassels.”

“Yes dear,” I say. “Sorry dear. Okay, next question, let’s see... Who is your favourite hero?”

She practically winces. “I hate the word hero.”

“Well, you prefer it to good guy.”

“Yeah, I do.”

“Alright then- who is your favourite character on the side of good?”

“China,” she says without hesitation. “I love her attitude. I love how she doesn’t care about anyone, I love how superior she is. I think she’s fantastic. And she’s so pretty!”

“She is pretty. Okay, your favourite character on the bad side.”

“Oh, it has to be Billy-Ray.”


“Billy-Ray all the way.”

“Any particular reason?”

“Well... he’s not annoying. I love the banter he has with Val when he pops up, it’s like he has to have a little conversation before he actually attacks anyone. I just think he’s really cool, and with his attitude he’s like a twisted version of China. He’s been my favourite from the start.”

“Unlike the other supposedly ‘annoying’ bad guys? Such as?”

“Oh God... Team Zombie.”

“So you’re not a fan of Scapegrace or Thrasher?”

“I just don’t find them funny.”

“You have no soul. Which villain would you least like to go up against?”

“Ohhh... I should have studied before I came. Em... Let me think about it... Oh, I know who it is.” She looks at me, and nods, and clicks her fingers. Ten seconds pass. “Oh God, what’s his name? The assassin from Mortal Coil.”

I raise an eyebrow. “And why is that?”

“Because I just picture this huge Russian, like the kind you see in the movies. And I love those movies about hitmen, I just think they’re awesome. Yeah, I’d definitely hate to go up against him. He seems to have all the angles covered. No matter what happens, no matter what Skulduggery does, even when things go wrong, he’s just like “oh I have to react” and bam. You’re dead. So he’s the one I’d least like to go up against, but the one that weirds me out the most is the... I’m so bad at names... the spider one...”

“The Torment.”

“Awww he makes me sick. Every time I think of him I think of cats coughing up furballs, you know? Except it’s spiders. I’m not scared of spiders. Like, spiders don’t bother me in the house, it’s just that ugh, they come out of his mouth. It’s like that X-Files episode, where your man is eating the cornflakes, and all of a sudden the cornflakes turn into worms, and he’s spitting them all out. Bleurgh.”

“What kind of books did you read when you were Valkyrie’s age?”

She ponders. “Em... I was a big, huge, gigantic fan of Phillip Pullman. He’s brilliant. I thought they were better than Harry Potter. I was so disappointed with the film. Gutted. But the books were brilliant.”

“He’s a very smart man. Very tall man, too.”

“Is he? Have you met him?”

“Once, in Italy. I was just introduced to him, I shook hands with him, and my mind went completely blank.”

“Were you awestruck, were you? Ah, he’s brilliant. So smart.” Her phone lights up, and she looks at it, and starts tapping. “I’m just going to send a text. You can work on your next question.”

“Oh, right. Uh, thanks. I might also include, in this interview, a little something about all the conversations we’ve had over the years that are interrupted by you sending a text message, or taking a call.”

“Yeah?” she says, without looking up.

“I think so.”

“Are you going to complain about it? Are you going to whine and moan?”

“Maybe a little. Because I can. And unlike every other aspect of my life, when I whine and moan here, people will actually care.”

“Oh yeah,” she says absently, “true.”

I sit there for another thirty seconds. “Oh my God, how long does that take?”

“Oh stop,” she sighs. “Since I started this touch screen thing it takes me ages. Okay, go for it.” She puts down the phone. “Ask me another question.”

“Okay... name me a few of your favourite movies.”

“Shawshank Redemption. Eh... Seven. Training Day. I’m just trying to think of films I can watch over and over again and don’t get fed up watching them. Michael Collins.”


“Yep. Eh... The Matrix. First one, none of the others. The Bourne movies. God, I love the Bourne movies. Should I throw in a girly one?”

“Do you have a girly one?”

She laughs. “Not really. No, actually, I do, I have two, from when I was really young. Pretty Woman and Coyote Ugly.”

“My God, you watched some seriously inappropriate films when you were a kid.”

“I really, really did. Ask me another question.”

“Okay, who do you listen to most on your iPod?”

“Muse. Straight up.”

“Wow, that was pretty definite. And you had the chance to see them live in concert a few weeks ago.”

“Ah, stop the lights. I was so sick that weekend. I couldn’t do anything that whole week. And then it absolutely lashed rain all weekend. I mean, give me a break, you know? I work in the rain so I was, like, I am not going to spend my weekend in the rain. No way.”

“Do you play any instruments?”

“No. I used to play the guitar.”

“Were you good?”


“What was your favourite type of music to play?”

“Anything I could sing along to. Green Day, U2, Jeff Buckley, even though I couldn’t sing along to Jeff Buckley because he’s so difficult to sing to, but I’d give it a go... A little Nirvana every now and then.”

“Tell the nice people about your dog.”

“Aw, my dog is awesomely cool.”

“And her name is?”


“And what is she?”

“She’s a Chinese Crested.”

“And does she look like the picture I posted on the Blog?”

“She definitely doesn’t. She looks way cooler than that.”

“She’s got no hair...”

“Okay, she’s got big ears-”

“Big fluffy ears.”

“She’s got big ears, no hair, she’s got booties... She does tricks.”

“Oh yeah, she turns around.”

“She doesn’t ‘turn around’, Derek, she does a twirl.”

“She poos on my floor.”

“She did that once, and she was a puppy. It was her first time in your house and she was just... marking her spot. She sits. She does high fives. She does twirls, she bows, she stays...”

“She stays? Is that a trick? Is ‘not moving’ a trick?”

“Shut up. She’s very clever.”

“How long have you had her?”

“She will be two in September.”

“And did your parents know you were buying a little doggy?”

“Absolutely not.”

“How did they react when you brought her home?”

“They said ugh, what is that?”

“And was it a struggle to get them to accept your doggy?”

“It definitely was. But I went on holidays for a week, and abandoned the dog with my mother, and when I came back my mother was in love with Ruby, because she could not resist her lovely little charms.”

“I see. And in your opinion, she’s not a silly dog at all, is she?”

“She’s not, she’s cool. And she’s actually very pretty. Some Chinese Crested dogs are ugly, you can look on the internet and see the ugliest dogs in the world, but Ruby is really pretty, and graceful, and lovely...”

“She’s like a little...”

“... and expensive...”

“... skinny rat...”

“Shut up, she is not. She’s not skinny. She’s quite blocky, actually. She’s in marathon training with my mum. They walk, like, 20 K twice a week, and then do regular walks every other day. Ruby is like the fittest dog around. That’s why she’s all muscley. She’s got guns.”

I laugh, and Laura sits forward, away from the microphone. “How am I doing?” she whispers.

“You’re doing very well,” I say.

She nods and sits back, adjusts her feet, and waits for me to continue.

Join us NEXT TIME for the second part of this interview, where Laura talks about Necromancers, feeling protective over Valkyrie, and who SHE would pick- Fletcher or Caelan.


Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...

'Not moving' is not a trick.
Sorry Laura, it's just not.

Nerdy Skeleton said...

I think Laura should adopt you as a pet, Mr. Landy! :D

Ha, but lovely first part. I'm excited for the next installment :)

Melissa said...

Loving this!

Can't wait for the next part :)

Saoirse Equus said...

And DEREK LANDY!!!! ARE YOU GOING TO PUT HORSES IN THE BOOKS!?!?!?!? :D :D :D THAT WOULD BE SO AWESOME!!!!! :D :D :D Because, i mean, horses are not for sissy's. they can be very dangerous animals, yet they can be the best friends in the world. my horse, goodeness shes awesome, will walk up to me even when shes eating, she'll stop and touch me with her nose (wich alot of horses don't)and she'll follow me around. shes the coolest horse EVER!!!! but because from the history books I've read, i know that fast horses appeal to Irish horsemen greatly, so give Val a Thoroughbred (king of all horse breeds) they are a 14- 17 hand tall horse that weighs up to 1200lbs yet can run at speeds up to 35-40mph for 2 miles oh good terrain, they are very nimble and full of heart, also very loyal. :D PLEASE!? :D

Saoirse Equus said...

good lord, sorry for the grammar and spelling mistakes, i'm in a hurry, vietnemese egg rolls are almost ready. :D sorry for any spelling mistakes in this post too. :D

SkulduggeryPleasantRulz said...

LOL! Awesome Interview... Thanx so much 4 doing it Laura... It was really interesting. Mr Landy, I think you should interview yourself... Well, get evry1 2 ask U questions and such and U answer them all about yourself... U should do that after Laura's a.k.a the REAL Valkyrie Cain's interview... which is pretty kool =D

SkulduggeryPleasantRulz said...

Don't put horses in the book... I don't really like horses... PUT TIGERS IN!!

Aimee =] said...

Cant wait to read this interview!!!!!!!

Unknown said...

Laura, you are amazing and awesome. You should know that you now have fans. Rabid fans. From the USA.
Exciting, isn't it?
Do you like Kill Bill?
Who are your role-models?
Is it fun to annoy Derek? Oh it must be. I envy you. We all envy you.
What's your favorite color?
How did you meet Derek?
Do you ever use the word "Derektastic"?
Who's your favorite author currently?
Your dog sounds cute. She has fans now too. And not moving is too a trick! Try getting a full-grown golden retriever to sit still. It takes effort! And Chinese Cresteds are generally even more hyper.

Liliana Pitchblack said...

Laura is /really/ an adorable person.
Seriously, that interview made me grin.
I'd really like to know how old she is, though...

Aimee =] said...

Laura you are a lovely person :)
Thank you for doing this interview for us, and I must say Phillip Pullman is amazing :) And I really had high expectations for ther movie...

I know right! Derek, please tell us her age! Its rude of us to ask, but I feel like I really need to know *Laughs*

ThatGirlTheyKnow said...

Laura, a few tings. One, I love Billy-Ray too. Two, China is my favourite person on the goos side, too. Ruby sounds like a little ball of cuteness :D Hero and Good Guy are titles that sometimes annoy me.
And I'm probably your biggest fan now. Because your awesome.
Thank you for doing this interview!


Nicole Fudge (Nicolette Croga) said...

15th! ... ahhh that was funny ...
just been reading the past entries as I have been .... away

okaii I was really either outside or on my xbox but I know what this blog can be like and that we dont normally get posts so .. whats the word ... oh I'm terrible with big words ... oh yeah frequently :)

any way I was wrong so never mind ...

loved the interview Laura seems amazing! ... and yes an awful lot like valkirye so with all of that I say good bye :)

-munchkin ninja penguin says peace out

P.S im probably 16th now but if not just ignore me

Blackjack Macabre said...

OMG can't wait for next interview it's gonna be lauratastic...or derektastic (depending on who says the coolest stuff)...I LOVE MUSE, by the way...and Green day as well (laura mentioned she played it on guitar)...I've decided I want to come and see ruby...she's quite popular...

Valora Destry said...

THats a pretty funky interview! And i so think stay is a trick, a very useful one at that. And if you like Shawshank Redemption, you'll love Sixth Sense (they have nothing in common but they are both amazingly crazy). And muse is pretty funkadelic as well.

can't wait for more!!

Monique said...

Hah ha! I want to meet Laura now, she sounds really cool. I googled Chinese crested dogs for mum and her expression was priceless XD!!
Green Day, YEEEEEEEESSS!! You know how many people at school hate that band? I love em!
Go Laura!! Yay!!

SkulduggeryPleasantRulz said...

Hey people! Check out my Skulduggery blog...! It's awesome... (I think). Laura... do U like Alice in Wonderland? I saw it 2 days ago and LOVED IT! THe Skulduggery Pleasant movie would be better though.

If they do it, Mr Landy, R U gonna have a say in the cast and crew? You've worked on movies before.

But would you mind if I tried (tried... coz I might end up completely wrecking it and giving up) to do an animated Skulduggery movie using Blender? One chapter at a time....? Coz I would like to TRY. Blender looks complicated but I really desperately need to see Skulduggery Pleasant on a screen, even if I do make it myself... do I need UR permission though...? Please... Would U let me TRY? Could you let me know on my blog - Skulduggery Pleasant Blog! ? Thanx! Also, I wouldn't want to disappoint you by making the characters look terrible.

Also I should be posting pics of front and side views of the characters on my blog people... So could you pleez comment on them to tell me what I need to change or if it doesn't look anything like the character... Coz, I'm not the best at drawing and even my friend who is a terrific drawer can't draw them or the faces properly... then again she's betta at drawing anime...
Anywayzz... pleez people thanx.







Oh, I do hope I get UR attention for those 2 paragraphs Mr Landy! I've already started work on the characters... unless you tell me not to do it because I wouldn't want to be copyrighting or anything...

Also, Derek Landy is awesome.

Claire said...

wow! awesome interview.. xD I can see why you didn't like Laura's dog Ruby :))

I can't wait for the next blog post!!! xDDD

Claire said...

to be honest.. the dog looks similar to a chuauwa whatever (idk how to spell it, but you know what I mean.) and its kinda girly.. I'd rather get a dog that more adorable, cute kinda thing you know? Not like dogs with fluffy ears and long hair with bows.. :S

Anonymous said...

I think, im going to like that Dog. He sounds funny. And Im really agree about Billy-Ray: I love him. He was the reason why i started reading the books in the original language.
I look forward to the next part.

Greetings from Germany,

ps: The assasine in "Mortal Coil" seems to be exciting.

Tanith Low said...

the chinese crested kinds looks like a mini horse i also saw a bull dog making a weird face at least i think it was a bull dog, anyway laura u MUST check out the vampire sucks trailer on you tube derek, i think Laura has more fans then u now (i can imagine laura celebrating). wow it feels weird calling another person laura lol my name is laura to and i think i thought i was the only person in the world with that name

Anonymous said...

Fletcher or Caelan? This can only cause trouble... =_____=;

But~ Necromancers sound great. o3o

Scapegoat Arkane said...

XD Brilliant. I actually laughed out loud. :)

Also, Mr. Landy, would it be possible for me to interview you for a project I'm doing in my English class? We're doing possible career paths and I'm an aspiring author, so I was wondering if I could ask you a few questions about writing (you being an incredibly successful author, My Golden God, a very successful one indeed...)

Can't wait for part two!

sarah wilkinson said...

i listen to the same music as laura!!! XD she is awesome! thankyou for doing the interview :D. ofcorse your still awesome my golden god!
*praises you*
cant wait for part 2.
ive already pre ordered my copy of mortal coil! XD
i happen to love scapegrace! he is so sweet :p

love u derek!!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Oh wow. Laura is so totally Valkyrie. She's got attitude. Cool attitude.

So funny when she mentioned she actually likes that movie 'Michael Collins'. I once dated a guy of the same name, and he forced me to watch that film with him, of course.

Ooh! This is only part one of the interview? Excellent news! Can't wait to read more :)

Unknown said...

wow FLETCHER FLETCHER!! ha there are two guys we call fletcher and caelan cause they fit the dicription even the jelousy lol but they made me valkyrie it's a good and bad thing! cause i get anoyed by the fletcher guy! and my friend looks like tanith =P

SkulduggeryPleasantRulz said...

Mr Landy, pleez consult my comment that says "DEREK LANDY READ AT LEAST THE 2ND AND 3RD PARAGRAPHS PLEEZ!" multiple times... Thanx.
I think UR the awesomest author ever. Skulduggery Pleasant is genious.
Also, gr8 interview, it was the most interesting one I have ever read =D

SkulduggeryPleasantRulz said...

Okay on that last comment of mine it says it's Aug. 9 2:20 AM... Where I am it's August the 9th, but it's 7:25 at nite...! KOOL! LOL
Also, Fletcher Renn is annoying... but awesome.

Star Lord said...

An assasin in Mortal Coil?
Is it the man with blood all over his eyes on the back cover?
You've really got me thinking Laura...

Star Lord said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kirsty :D said...

OMG, Mr. Landy, would you please give Laura a high-five. SHE ROCKS!
She likes Sanguine and MUSE!!!!!!!!! A lady of impeccable taste, quite obviously :D
And also, OMG that Russian assassin guy sounds epic...CAN'T WAIT FOR MORTAL COIL!!!
Anyways, enough for now, bye :)

Star Lord said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Abbi said...

omg... she going to answer my question in the next part *faint from the love of it* ( team caelan ^^)
Haha such witty banter here ^^

laura said...

HA! Its so weird reading your own conversations when they're written down!!

SkulduggeryPleasantRulz said...

LOL... I reckon it'd B pretty funny reading UR own conversation... 'Specially if it's a funny one. I'd like to see what I came up with when my brother and I have one of our absolutely stupid conversations.

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor...?

Where's my tractor?

LOLZ! Classic, simple but stupid... one of mah favourite jokes!


Also, Tanith Low is AWESOME.
So is the Mad Hatter in Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland =D!

-D <--- LOL... Cyclops.

Star Lord said...

Laura, is your taken name Valkyrie Cain, or is it something else?

Anonymous said...

Laura! Oh my God you rock!
Not as much as Derek... but close.
You have exquisite taste, might I say, well except for the fact that you like CHINA!
I really don't see how you can class her as a 'good' guy after what she did to Skulduggery's family!!
But that's just my opinion... no offence intended.
Derek you rock, keep doing your incredibly funny blogs.
Alexia xxx

Derek Landy said...

SkulduggeryPleasantRulz- I'm afraid I can't give you any input or advice or comments about your plans, but you can absolutely go ahead and give it a try. Good luck...!

We had such a good time doing this interview. It was an hour and three quarters of laughing and chatting and lobbing insults back and forth... I think there's going to be four parts of this interview in all- the second part will be appearing later today...

Geckogirl said...

ahhhh sarthacus that is an awfaully good question for Laura! i second that question. mr.Landy u must ask laura that!
and now for a moment of pure outburst about the finale of Sherlock last night. Be warned this contains spoilers and also some stuff that u might argue with. *cough,cough,cough* ready?

now heres the bit you guys will probably kill me for saying:
Last night's Sherlock was as good as Skulduggery Plesant.
now i can imagine this was going through your brains:
"NOOOO!nothing is as good as Skulduggery Plesant! she must be shunned for saying such things! shun the non-believer! SHUUUUUN!"
yesterday before 9.00pm i would have agreed with you. but now...i do not.
you guys hate me now dont you?
dont get me wrong Derek i still believe Skulduggery is one of the best things ever on the planet. but Sherlock was just as good.
opps...ive done it now. fan girls (and boys for that matter) shall come to my house in the night and take me to a giant hole in the ground filled with smelly socks and jedward and leave me there. *shiver* what have i done?
oh Alexia i also agree that to me,China is not a good guy because of what she did to skulduggery's family! well that is,if your reading this and havent shunned me yet.
but someone please back me up Serlock was epic was it not? anyone? oh. you've all shunned me then. oh and there we go Hellboy has set another bomb in by cornerso i carnt go there. *sigh* well...ill be going then. *sniffles*
geckogirl out.

Geckogirl said...

eppp! Derek just posted before me! noo! he shall shun me 2!!!!!!!! please no golden god! im sorry for my opinion.
btw derek did u see sherlock? please golden god back me up here wasnt it utter amazingness?

Star Lord said...

Thank you Geckogirl...
Have you got a taken name?
I guess the answer is "No Sarthacus! I can't decide!"
You need to get one quickly!

Abbi said...

A full 105 minutes of interviewing fun , you must of had a whale of a time
cant wait fore part 2, thanks for adding my question to it , lord landy? mr landy? golden god? what do we call you again ?

Anonymous said...

staying is a trick. ecpesically if ruby is on a tightrope over a pit of lava with the worlds most delecable dog treats surrounding her

Star Lord said...

I saw a music video of "The Ring" by accident...
My "Freind" was so scared he closed his eyes for most of it.
His dad said: "Oh, yeah! There's a well down the street! WOuld you mind getting some water, while iI find a plastic bag?"
The girl is Creepy!

Geckogirl said...

well actually sarthacus im quite close to getting my taken name :D
im so close but its not yet perfect! the second name is the it i might need to change.
its Skylara Swiftail. what do u think? but im still not sure about the Swiftail...hmm... any suggestions guys?

Star Lord said...

Skylara Swiftail...
I do like the Skylara part. Very creative.
Swiftail is also quite good, but... no offence, but it dosent have that bang to it, if you know what I mean...

Star Lord said...

What you should do, when you've decided, is change your display name from Geckogirl to your taken name.
... OK I think the lol thing and all of the faces id easily not my style.

Star Lord said...

IS easily not my style not id!

Geckogirl said...

i know exactly what u meen Sarthacus! thats exactly what i thought! hmm... i must think of a second name!

Making the Legend said...

That is so funny.

I JUST ordered Mortal Coil and I'm very VERY excited. (VERY EXCITED)

For all the people who live in America like me, you can order it from this site and get it when it comes out in the UK.

that's where i've gotten all the other books. :) (and theres free shipping :D )

Star Lord said...

Do you want something with Swift in it?

Anabelle said...

Who would she pick---Fletcher or Caelan? What, Skulduggery isn't a choice?!

Am I the only one who thinks that Valkyrie should be with Skulduggery? It's not that bad when you look at Twilight...>.> And, regardless, I've always felt that these books shouldn't have too much romance. It would ruin the fun. And action. :P

Anonymous said...

sitting still is not a trick ... even my cat can do that!

plus i have just started my new blog ...

if the link doesnt work dont blame me blame copy and paste !!
fly on keep writing!

Anonymous said...

ohmygosh laura listens 2 green day?? ahh they are awsome. and Mr. Landy/Dereck/Master/Golden God, i (being a young aspiring actor and director) have some suggestions for casting and directing for the SKulduggery Pleasant movie, if you're intereseted. i personally think my ideas are quite brilliant

Mr Connor said...


Who Is This Mortal Coil Assasin? Huh? WHO? This is the Question Of LIFE?

Anonymous said...

and annabelle... skulduggery is like decades older than her. that could cause a bit of legal trouble. plus... hes a skeleton. (being a boy i cant be sure) but i would assume that being a skeleton would kind of put teenage girls off. and please do not compare Skulduggery to Twilight. we all know that Twilight is nowhere near Skulduggery Plesant's level

Anonymous said...

also, to Laura: i find Team Zombie hilarious. Especially

(who has never actually killed anyone)

"...when i kill people i make art with blood and messiness..."

Wonka said...

ha! i KNEW Hannah Foley's dog wuz based on Ruby ever since you posted up that pic Derek!
HURRY UP SEPTEMBER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sitting still is so not a trick. and niether is walking around in a circle. my cats can do BOTH of those 'tricks' and they are the thickest animals alive.
Skulduggery and Valkyrie are never EVER meant to be. I mean- he is OVER FOUR HUNDRED, and Valkyrie is about sixteen. That is just... i dunno, whong. Who's stupid idea was THAT??

GreyAngel said...

if sitting still was worth merit in any species then people with pet lizards,spiders and snakes could get their own crufts

Docktor, Emily said...

Mr. Derek it makes me sad that i have to skip over some parts of the interview because i haven't read some of the the books simply because, There not out in America yet! Do you know when Dark Days and the next will be out here. I feel sometimes like i'm going through withdrawal... (book addiction is healthy) I'm stuck reading Darren Shans Demonata series. And I fell slightly guilty for doing so.

Derek Landy said...

Emily, it looks like you're going to have to get both Dark Days and Mortal Coil from Canada or the UK, at least until we figure out our publishing strategy in America...!

Anonymous said...

skulduggery and valkeire.... not like that. i dont think so. wouldnt that kind of kill theyr awsome war-of-words partners relationship? now, if he wanted to, im sure mr. landy could make it work. but still.. i mean theres still a pretty huge age gap. that and the fact that Skulduggery is a skeleton. i dont know...
also: is Skulduggery over the his wife that Serpine killed? it didnt neccesarily seem like it in book 1. some clarification on that issue would be nice.

i would also like some clarification about the Movie. i heard 2010, then 2011, then 2012, then 2013??? when is the movie coming out???????

Mr. Landy, i (the aspiring actor and director) still have multiple interesting (and in my humble opinion, rather clever) ideas for the movie in terms of casting, style, directing, etc.

Anonymous said...

if you are interested, i would be more than happy to share them

Katy A said...

I agree with Laura, the Golden Compass was a RUBBISH film but the books were great XD I'm curious about this assassin now...

Anonymous said...

lol i actaully didnt notice any errors. should i read through it again 2 find them? haha

Katy A said...

And I support Valduggery. It's not wrong, he would OBVIOUSLY wait until she was older. Probably. I have this argument frequently with my friend Becky, who supports Fletcherie and also with people on the SP fanpage on FB :P

Anonymous said...

ahhh. found 'em. lol

Anonymous said... i have to disagree. skulduggery dosnt seem like the type to get into a relationship with someone that much younger. hes much to classy to be a dirty old man

Anonymous said...

but, yes the Golden Compass movie was truly awfull, while the book was excellent.

Katy A said...

Yes, but he would LOOK about 30 if he were not a skeleton. When Valkyrie was say, 25, it wouldn't be as bad as now, when she's 15

JackStephen said...

This blog post is made of awesomeness.

Star Lord said...

Cool new Dark Days cover!

Unknown said...

Woohoo! Just by reading this my day has became awesome. It's foundation is now made of awesomeness, which may I say is the best foundation. I can see how she inspired Valkyrie. Though, (Not to affend, though I probably will) I can't stand small dogs. I have an ancient rough collie named Morgana and a huge white half artict wolf and half malamute named Loki. Now to get away from my rambling, I can not wait for the second part of this interview of sheer awesomeness. I think I may die from either the awesomeness or the wait. (I'm still rambling aren't I?) I have used the word awesome and awesomeness too much... until the next interview... Anuashimika (I can speak Korean but I can't spell in it...)

Harly Ryker said...

Haha, Scapegrace is funny. =)
"when I kill people, I make art with the bloodiness and messiness...-"
"Yes, but but you haven't actually killed anyone yet, have you?"
ew ew ew! I'm sorry, but Skulduggery and Val??!! no way! He's more like her big brother, or something. TEAM FLETCHER! Though Caelan's cute, though....*drools over Fletcher and Caelan*
China is very awesome! She reminds me of that scene in the MUMMY when Evie was making a deal with the dude to get O' Connor out of being hanged, and she tricked him into her way. =) Kinda reminds me of me, a bit. Don't take no for an answer.Billy Ray....I love him! He's like talking to someone, then trying to kill them the next minute.

stay weird.
Harly Ryker

Star Lord said...

The man in the mask,on the back cover, is the man in Dark Days. He's the man in Chapter 34. He and "Killer Marr" as I call her, are out to destroy the world.
It's really funny how Skulduggery's always smiling.
What I still don't get is why the partner of Marr has smoke coming out of his mask...

Saoirse Equus said...

DEREK!!!! PA-LEEEZEE!!! Will you answere my question about the Horse question???? It's comment number 5. Is laura the one who likes horses? does she have horses??? Horses, if you take the time to get to know them, they are the most intriguing animal EV-ER. the way they think, the way they lern, the way they comunicate... its amazing. I never could tell a horses attitude, but then a famous horseman named Clinton Anderson, (I have 3 autographs form him SQUEEEEE!!!!!) Explained it ti me in three words. So SIMPLE! And now, i can read my horse like a book. its like a Man From Snowy River or Horse Whisperer moment every time my horse and I learn something or teach the other something together.:D :D :D

DeacyAmp said...

Muse! Win! :)

Derek Landy said...

Racin_Ruffian- consider it answered..!

Star Lord said...

Lord Landy, Am I right?
About the man with the mask?

Derek Landy said...

Sarthacus... you're going to have to read the books, I'm afraid...!

Star Lord said...

Well, I did read a sample... and laughed for most of it...
No, not the death or Necromancer bit, but Skulduggery smiling...
Even right not I'm grinning.

Star Lord said...

Sorry, I meant Even right now... not "not".

Star Lord said...

But I worked it out as soon an Ranaja, or... Sorry, I've forgotten his name, but he said "A man in a mask, with an accent."
So I thought: "This Man is on the back cover of Mortal Coil!"
Did you get my code? Mirror?

Docktor, Emily said...

Thanks for the advice, since i'm currently jobless i'll have to wait but when summer classes are over and i pass with an A my mom will get them for me! (slightly embarrassed college student) From then i can read the interviews completely and have a complete life!!!

Tanith Low said...

wow its so nice of derek and laura to acually have a look and coment on what people say i feel that our golden god cares about us i feel loved

lilian.thigh said...

My, my, how generous the gods have been.

That was MY question and LAURA HAS A COAT! 8D Thank you very much, sweetheart. *salutes*

Madi said...

AWW YEHH!!!!!!! MUSE, straight up, i like this girl, well women (im 12 so i cant REALLY say girl......wateva) LAURA IS AWESOME....AND SHE HAS A COAT!!!!!!!!! cannot WAIT for the next old is she anyways....she sounds AWESOME...and I agree with the...ermm...person a little further up....Mr.Landy, YOU sound like ur allready Lauras pet!!!!

oh, and Skulduggery Pleasant is AWESOME(just thought ide put that in)

Bethany said...

I would just like to take the time to say that I hate my laptop for being so ridiculously annoying. Thank the good Lord that my dad has a laptop that I can use.

Well, I'm rather happy with that. China is such a fascinating character. I love characters like her who only ever seem to be looking out for themselves and no one else. They're on their own team.

And Billy-Ray is definitely one of my favourite characters of all time.

Team Caelan.

Thankyou,formythoughtsareshared said...

haha. That's funny.

Liz said...

hey yall


PS i am lizzy i got a different name

Louisa Rose said...

Sherlock was amazing.
me and my friend Harriet had a funny text message conversation about it.
She has a crush on Benedict so i said-
'You do know he's 34, and probably gay or married.'
and she said -
'They all are, it just does't matter any more'

Lol she cracks me up like a nut.

Derek, do you approve of Sherlock? and yes, Gekogirl, I agree, Sherlock is tieing with Skulduggery atm for me.
We don't hate you for saying it.
It's hard NOT to like the sarcasm with Sherlock.

Im likeing the violin a whole lot more now *winks*

And that scene right at the beginning in Minsk with the murderer,

M: You've gotta help me Mr Holmes, everyone says you're the best!I'll get hung for this!'

(SH pauses and turns)

SH: Haung? nooo . . . . Hanged? Yes .

aah pure genius.
But doesn't it sound like something Skulduggery might do? I's sorry if I offend you Mr Landy, but Sherlock and Skulduggery ARE very simular in charecter. And doesn't Lestrade sound mightly like Guild?
Perhapse that's why I love Sherlock so much, he's a lot like Skulduggery in many respects.

Perhapse Benedict Cumberbatch is what Skulduggery looked like before he became a wise-cracking skeleton? Well, in my mind he is.


Anonymous said...

I like it but it'd be better whit a colour distinction between both of ye. E.g., green for derek, red for Laura

Daisy101 said...

PLEASE TELL US WHEN THE AUDITIONS FOR VALKYRIE CAIN IS!!!!!! IM SAVING UP MONEY TO GO TO DUBLIN TO AUDITION.... my heart has stopped beating. im begging you derek! IM ON MY SORE KNEES!!!! please,please,please,please tell me when it is. i really love acting and i love ur books like hell

acting for a movie+skullduggery pleasent movie= ME AS VALKYRIE CAIN!!!!! pleeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaasssssssseeeeeeeeee post a blog about the auditions or email me at I will ignore junk emails by other people. BEGGING OF U!!!

Unknown said...

Omg laura!! Your actually thee coolest person ever!! I love shawshank redemtion, its like, the best movie made.. and michael collins.. hes my, um, good guy :D

Love, Laura xx

Btw, cool name :)

YeahItsChloe said...

Wow!!! I loved this first section of the interview!!

I have to agree with you on:

They're both just.... just..... i don't know what word to use.... errmm.... AWSOME!!

Derek i love you soooo much for writing these books and doing this interview!

Valkyrie said...

I need followers on my skulduggery blog.
Derek i love Skulduggery Pleasant so much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it is so awesome...

Octa said...

Hello there.

Octa said...

My name is Horace.

Octa said...

Like Octaboona but different.

Octa said...

I make no sense.

Octa said...


Octa said...

Achievement completed.

Mary Contrary said...

*misses some more because I'm going through a tired spot, okay? :P*



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Anonymous said...

I am jumping on the bandwagon REALLY late here, but you GO, Laura!
And if Laura should ever read this: Oh my GOSH you are SO MUCH like Val! It's like Mr. Landy here (who REALLY needs to come to Singapore) invented this conversation and just did it with himself and Valkyrie!

I just realized that the sentence above makes no sense whatsoEVER. Please, ignore it.

Octa said...


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