Ah, the Jitter Girls.
They’re quite scary, you know. Scary and unstoppable. Or maybe more creepy than scary. But unstoppable. Definitely unstoppable.
I came up with the Jitter Girls as part of a script that never got made. In fact, it was this same script in which I came up with the idea for the Cleavers, as well. That script had a whole load of ideas, but unfortunately it just wasn’t very good. All these madcap ideas didn’t cohere into anything resembling sense, so I abandoned the script and started cannibalising my own stuff, taking what worked and using it somewhere else.
Which is why I’m writing about the Jitter Girls, ten years after coming up with them.
January was, basically, a month writing various short stories and whatnot. I had reached the halfway point of Book Six, and was quite comfortable with taking a few weeks off to get some other work done. Well, now I’m back at it, and I needed a new threat for the middle section and I was searching through this magnificent mind of mine and those creepy ol’ Jitter Girls just jumped right out at me.
I knew I’d get to use them, sooner or later.
I’m not going to tell you much about them, other than that they are currently giving Skulduggery and Valkyrie quite a hard time. I haven’t a clue how they’re going to be defeated, either. The way I’m writing right now, it looks like the Jitter Girls are going to kill our heroes and skip off into the darkness. Which, you know, would be bad for the rest of the book.
Oh dear. I seem to have written myself into a proverbial corner.
I should probably get back to work.
4,087 comments:
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lol lunar! that would be pretty cool- as long as im the one who fired it ;)
ah! might not talk much. the girl is pestering me and i am just replying with sarcastic comments.
girl: never mind, seriously give me help or miss will shout !!!!!
Me: shes not really a shouter...more of a 'throw sarcastic comments your way while laughing manically kind of teacher'
Girl: JUST HELLLLPPPP!
teehee...is it bad that i find this funny?
*chases after Skylara*
Mmmm... Rainbows!
Can I just have a tiny nibble?
Please?
*makes alpaca eyes*
See. I'm making cute alapaca eyes.
I want to taste the delicious rainbowy pringleish happinessness that is Skylara Wolfbane!!!!
*notices octa is still chasing after her*
did i say rainbows? erm...i ment...Tame roes! yeah...you know like roe deer!?
you wouldn't want to kill an innocent little deer would you octa? *shapeshifts into a deer and looks up at octa with big round eyes*
Fosters- Good Call
*looks at the cute little deer*
I... can't... eat... you!
Too...cute!
I want lots of chocolate and cookies then!
*has deer eyes and alpaca eyes 'cuteness stare contest' with octa*
*cat walks in, a package of chocolat cookies in mouth*
Must overcome the deer eyes!
*stares back with large alpaca eyes*
It's a miracle!
*chases after the cat*
Give me the cookies!!!
Hi Aquila!
Yes I meant to say hi but the cookies distracted me
HI AQUILA!!!!!
*cat runs away, her footprints leaving a "hi all!" behind*
*thinks about it for a moment*
*drops cookies*
*stares at the cookies dropped on the ground*
*gingerly reaches for them*
*looks around to make sure no one is there*
*picks up a cookie*
*eats it*
Mmmmmmm.
Cookies.
*starts cleaning herself*
Hey Dragona.
lol kallista! just read the 37 things to do in an elevator thing on knights blog! so funny!
my favorite is: drop a pen then wait for someone to try and pick it up and then scream "That's mine!"
lol!
Hi Octa :)
Jee wizz. You know how to make them. I mean, when you first hear the name you think "LOL!!11!!!1 LANDYZ TALKIN BOUT SUM POWERPUF GRILZ11!!!!!1"
But then you think about it and the mental images I'm getting of them is insane. One of those Black Swan sort of things. Like, in the film when Natalie Portman is convinced *SPOILER* she's seeing people with her face on their necks and you come out of the cinema terrified in case it happens to you.
Well, now The Jitter Girls are giving me the creeps and I am not looking forward to three o'clock this morning.
*purrs*
*runs away*
*comes back with a bouquet*
*drops it at Dragonas feet*
Aww thanks Aquila :)
*pats her*
Oh, hi Dragona!
Sorry, I'm just drawing mask designs for art...
Hi Lunar. :)
Soft Kitty
Warm Kitty
Little ball of fur
Happy Kitty
Sleepy Kitty
Purr. Purr. Purr.
I love the big bang theory :D
soz guys! g2g for a shower! at least then i wont smell of alpaca/chicken...
octa: *looks up* what?
skylara: heh..nothing! *runs away*
bye guys!
*somersaults away*
hey...i couldn't even do somersaults this morning! :D
all that step arerobics in pe must be paying off :D
byes!
Brb, signing in on laptop.
oh and lunar! vampire diaries tonight! *woops continuously*
*silence falls all around skylara*
aww...*hangs head and slinks away*
Bye Skylara!
*looks confused*
*slowly walks to purring Octa*
Meow?
Meow!
Mew. Meeeew. Meeeeoooowwww! Purr. Woof. Puuurr.
Bye Skylara!
*changes to human*
*raises eyebrow*
You want a shower of marshmallows and ice?
g2g
Supper
Bye!
welcome back /bye
Hi Aquila.
I wonder where Kallista is...
Bye Octa!
C.R.A.Z.Y
:)
Hi Kallista!
*waits for slow computer*
*sighs*
Kallista, I feel bad for feeling bad (if that makes any sense whatsoever) and now it feels like you're marrying me just to make me happy. I'm sorry for acting the way I did and I never should have done it, it just felt as though my heart had been crushed into more than a million pieces then run over by a steamroller. If you're doing it just to make me happy, please don't, I won't be as sad as I was because I know it's what you want.
My tea was good, thank-you for asking Kallista. I had chinese chicken and new potatoes :P
I'm fine *stares at computer, angry* kind of.
*turns head to mountain of work*
*sighs*
*starts working while waiting for her computer to load*
I love you too Kallista. I'm sorry for acting the way I did and for telling people we said, they asked me and we both know I can't bring myself to lie.
Thrice hasn't been on in a while, but he keeps sending Lunar messages. His dog is going to have puppies on saturday. He's ok, don't worry.
I hope you get better soon (whether that's feeling ill or emotional illness).
It would take a lot to you upset anyone on here, you're the nicest person I've talked to so don't worry about it, you can't upset anyone.
Brb.
Anyone on? PLEASE let some one be on, cos if no ones on, I'll start shouting about fat ponies again! *stares threatiningly* God damnnit, my stupid comp keeps freezing! *bangs on the side.* "WHATS WRONG WITH YOU!!"
Back.
Hi Cresent.
*takes out sword and cuts the work open, rescuing Kallista*
The chinese chicken was nice.
I like magic mushrooms. *stares dopely*
Hi Cresent!
*looks at doubled amount of work*
*mumbles*great, Dragona, just great*mumbles*
Lol Kallista, I've never had grilled turkey burgers.
Cresent, you know magic mushrooms are drugs... right?
Lol Aquila.
i love this face: :D it reminds me of charlie the unicorn and the 1960's and 1970's
What's charlie the unicorn?
Lol Kallista.
*uses magic yorkshire pudding to heal her*
look it up on youtube :D and yes i am aware they are drugs. also i might leave unexpectently if my mam comes up...I dont want her to kno i have a blog she'd freak if she knew i was talking to you, saying your all pervs and silly things like that, and wud make me stop going on it all together and monitering my every move...*sigh*
I can't look it up on youtube, when I watch a video this laptop crashes.
Anyone on?
Well its this really funny random video thing of this grumpy unicorn called charlie and these 2 hilarious annoying unicorn who do the most random stuff and talk in a voice that reminds me of: :D
Ok Kallista.
Ah... sounds cool lol.
Lol Kallista.
║║╔║║╔╗ ║
╠╣╠║║║║ ║
║║╚╚╚╚╝ O
Yes i know your not, I am perfectly aware of that, but she would go soooo ballistic...I showed her my first post and she didnt like the fact i said i was 12, and then she wanted my username and password...but she forgot then and she would do her nut if she knew i was communicatingg with ppl across the web. But what else am i supposed to do? stay crampedup in the house in my pjs doing nothing except eating junk sittingin front of the tv? and i dont really talk to much ppl were i live...but ya everytime she comes up i have to x off, and pretend i was on paint the whole time. its sooo annoying.
Bye!
CRESENT! You were talking about Charlie the Unicorn!
I LOVE CHARLIE THE UNICORN!!!!
Your mum must be really strict or something, my mum doesn't care what I do. As long as I don't do facebook, I don't know why but she won't let me have it although I don't want it. I'd rather come on here by a MILE!
*looks out of mountain of work*
I'm down here somewhere... I think...
*continues working in order to find herself again*
Lol Aquila.
MY LIFE IS SO BORING! I would die of boredom if it werent for you guys :) I like going on the internet, cos you can create a tottally new persona for yourself and people cant really judge you, and anything u done in the past is nothing here and here you matter and its just so awesome!!!
Lol Kallista. You can't corrupt people, and neither can you influence people in a negative way. You've had a good effect on me, I've become a better person. THAT'S how you've influenced me, then they think it's bad? :S
When I come on here, or on habbo or anything like that, I don't create a different person, everything about me being pshycic, having a photographic memory and being 6ft 4... that's all true and so is everything I say, I can't bring myself to lie.
Aww... I can't watch the video :(
Brb.
You know, she not actually that strict at all...Its just when it comes to the internet shes just really strict.
You know its weird to think you are actually real people! The only person who seems real to me is kallista cos i seen a pic of her there fore have a image...But its weird to think people half way round the world think about me and know me..Its like when you took a picture years ago and you look at it and in the backround you see some one just a normal person, no one you know, and you wonder were they are now, what there doing, and if they know some 12 yr old girl is staring at them from a pic they never knew they were in...The universe works in mystereious ways i struggle to comprehend...
I don't creat a different person, too. I'm pretty much the one you know (plus the part of me that's lost in translation ^^).
Hail Derek! As always I am delighted to see that you have taken time out of your awesomenessssss to talk to your loyal minions. But, I must say that if you do somehow kill of Skulduggery it may not give you much of a story to carry on with... :P
But, if you DID decide to kill them off then I'm sure that you'd be able to use that magnificano brain of yours to bring them back again somehowwwww.... maybe a way that defies gravity?? : )
Back.
Hey Skulduggery dudes and dudettes! : )
I'm currently nomming on a multitude of Jaffa Cakes from Asda, Morrinsons, Tesco and Sainsbury'ssssss to see which one are best! : )
Hi Alexia! I haven't talked to you in AGES!
Hi Alexia. Did we meet before?
Hey Dragona! I've missed our cybbbbbeeeeeeer - chattttttttiiiiiiing! How have you been my friend?? Still as awesome as eva I hope..
Cresent, I'm real... I think...
*pokes self*
Yes I'm deffintely real. This is me.
Aquila, people know me too. I've told everyone on here everything there is to know about me. I live in Yorkshire, I'm pshycic, I have a photographic memory, I'm 14, I'm 6ft 4, I have brown hair and brown eyes... what else do you need to know?
Helllooooooooooooo Aquila I donot beleiveee we have been introduced. I'm Alexia! : )
Oh and I throw people like a javellin...
Well, yes. I've been good lol. How've you been?
Ahhhh, Dragona you are privillaged with many talents! : )
I'm Aquila (in fact that's not my name... big surprise, right? ^^).
Dragona,I didn't want to say you're creating a different person. I just wanted to state that I don't do it. (xept for the shapeshifting, of course ;-P)
Kallistaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Helloooooooo my friend I am glad to be taling to you again. How be'ith you sibling???
I dont lie about who i really am, i just like making up names, and writing/saying stuff, you cant in real life like GET ME A FAT PONY! or i like magic mushrooms. I think those things in real life, but only say them to my closest friends and you guys, cos i know you wont judge me.
And also many curses Alexia... well 2 curses actually...
Kallista, I completely agree with you. I trust everyone on here more than I trust my friends at school and I would rather have you guys any day! I wouldn't trust my friends at school with a PENCIL, but I would trust you people with my life... or something more important.
*bows*
This is the side of me I don't show, this is me, who I am on here.
Oh Kallista the sound of your cyber-chatting is music to my cyber ears! He he!
: ) : ) : ) : ) : )
TEH SMILIES ARE EVERYWHERE!!!
: ) : ) : ) : ) : ) : )
Hi Ayesha.
Ahhh, I think all of you guys are much more trustworthy than any of my friends at school. I don't have a best friend, or any close friends becuz I just read tooooo much and everyone thinks I am wierd. But you guys have never said I'm weird and I really respect that! : )
An Avril Lavigne song is on Burnout Dominator (racing game) and you can set it in different languages! Spanish and Japanese sounds so funny for the song XD
Hi Ayesha!
Because you're not weird Alexia.
Oh dear Kallista...
*rushes to get a ladder*
*falls down the same man hole*
*uses rocket boots to fly down the manhole after Kallista and catch her before she hits the bottom*
*flies back up to the ground*
I'm listening to the radio...
http://www.dieneue1077.de/1077_cms/stream/80_besterrockundpop.php
It's a regional channel, but you can listen to them via internet, too. ^^
*rescues Alexia also*
Yeah, spend 5 minutes wiv me in real life and you may think differently... he he!
*Head bangs to Linkin Park for no apparent reason*
:'(
omg saw the most horrible thing today wen i was on the bus... a woman was holding a cat wen she got near the road to cross to the other side she put the cat down and the cat walked behind her.. but all of a sudden a car came sppeding past and ran over the poor cat and didnt even stop. the cat started twitching like it was having a heart attack and the woman ran back to get the cat it was still twitching in her arms. I think it died cuz it stopped moving.... IT WAS HORRIBLE THAT PERSON WHO DROVE OVER THAT POOR INNOCENT KITTEN WAS TRUELY MEAN =(
That's a bit slow Kallista, you've already been rescued... because I'm quick... too quick :P
Aww... that's terrible Ayesha. My cat got ran over and it had to loose a leg and two toes on one foot. It hops along now...
SCREAMING!
* DRAGONA AND KALLISTA ARE SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO O AWESOME AND SOME OF THE BEST CYBER FRIENDS I WILL EVER HAVE! : )
Kallista, I completely agree with you. I trust everyone on here more than I trust my friends at school and I would rather have you guys any day! I wouldn't trust my friends at school with a PENCIL, but I would trust you people with my life... or something more important.
*bows*
This is the side of me I don't show, this is me, who I am on here.
Dargona, thats what i mean TOO! Real life sucks. Cyber life rules.
And here are some things you may or may not know about me! (oh god if my mam say this she would throttle me) I am a girl, i live in Ireland, Dublin, I am 12 years old, currently in 1st year, i am quite tall for my age (how tall exactly im not sure) I have long thick brown hair died red, so its kinda auburn now, dark brown eyes, tanned skin (my dads from africa so i inheritated that from him) I wear glasses almost the same ones as kallista, i have an older brother, who enjoys hurting me, and today we had a fight which hurt (winces) but every fight means im tougher and i know more moves, so i wear my bruises proudly :) and i have 2 cats and i adore reading. i live with my mam and bro at home.
There, thats just about everything your gonna get. And oh yeah, i have an over grown side fringe and a complex mind, and i enjoy writing and genereal sillyness and randomness.
HI KALLISTA
Thanks Alexia, you're awesome too :)
Wow, that's a long comment Cresent :P
*humms 99 Luftballons by Lena*
I had a pshycic dream about a guy being murdered a few days ago... it still freaks me out... and the fact it's DEFFINATLY going to happen, or already has makes it even weirder...
*shudders*
Don't worry Dragona, there are worse things to dream about, especially if you also dream about the past...
Considering everyone else is being honest and open, I will be too!!!!!
Hi, I'm a girl (if you didn't know that well you doooooo know) I'm 15 years old with copper hair and an abundance of freckles on my face. I am a golfer and an archer by sport and and A* student (not bragging of course becuz I'm modest in all my modestyness) I promote being completely wacky and being a minion to our awesome leader, The Golden God! : )
You didn't see it Aquila... and I dream about the both the past and the future.
Poor cat..i dont know what id do if my poor kitties got run over..i couldnt cope..there like my children! Oh, and also, some fave music of mine, Paramore (dont leave farros!) Linkin Park, Flo and the machine, and much more i cant remember
@ kallista
i know but it was still horrible. i love cats and that was horrible
By the way, I once nearly killed a cat pretty much the same way this person did. Unexperienced as I am, I braked and the cat survived. But usually you shoudn't brake, especially not if someone is driving behind you and the animal is smaller than a dog.
It appears that Derek Landy has managed to dig himself into a hole with an evil one hit wonder girl-band.
But hey, it's open to interperation.
I cannot spell good. I have so mangled a word that it is unrecognizable to Spell Check, the reason you can read most of the words I'm typing.
I had something to say a minute ago. Now I've forgotten with my incessant rambling. Botheration.
It was about... my army. Or something... NO! I remember! For mentions under a pseudonom, (Look another mangled word) I have to advertise this:
http://smlcomedy.podomatic.com/
Watch it! It HILARRYIOUS. I assure you.
But now that I've mentioned I've an army, do NOT be shocked when I conquer the world with my army of ducks. They think you aren't feeding them enough you see.
Feed the ducks! They'll spare you in the years
to come!
Love,
Cluainn Fhada and Isaac.
ha ha ha ha aha haha ahahsahsjasajsdksjfdfhuiewhfjkrebfrjefvj!
Ooops... dog sat on da keyboard and I can't be bovered to press the delete key! He He! : )
Lol Alexia.
Dreaming about the past... I'm sure glad I'm not able to :S.
Yeh well... I wish I couldn't do it Aquila. But I can't change that :(
I'm gonna go to da shops now wiv ma mom cuz she needs washin powder and I'm out of Jaffa Cakes... see you later my friends! : ) : )
Good for you you never visited a KZ... dreaming about THAT would be worse, for sure.
*shudders*
Bye Alexia, I hope you come on again soon :)
Bye Alexia!
KZ?
bye alexia
Seeeeeeeeeee you lateeeeerrrrrrrr! : )
Konzentrationslager... dictionary says it's concentration camp in English. We visited it two years ago...
Aww... that sounds terrible Kallista :/
Bye Alexia.
We were doing about them in History, Aquila... they aren't nice. Luckily the furthest I've seen is 5 years both ways.
Awwww.. poor deer. thats horrible
*eyes well up with tears* AWWW THANKS!tackles kallista in a bear hug* see what i mean? you guys are AWESOME! and im no were near as beautiful as you kallista and i know, i saw you r photo! and your bautiful on the inside too! Your so nice to all of us, when my big mouth says all the wrong things at all the wrong times, and gets me into embarressing situations...like that time when i called samantha a tangariune, then she figured out what it meant, and im afraid shes mad at me...it doesnt matter thou, il always have S.P.!(sp doesnt actually stand for skul pleasent, its the nick name for my best bud, and she calls me W.S.!)
Sometimes I get the feeling no one even pretends to read my rantings. It's incredibly fun to rant.
Even when you have to type out the rant because unintelligible mutterings make you sound like your crazy, which of curse I am, what with the being a huggie and wanting to rule the world and own a fez and BURN things.
BUUURN! BUUUURN!
I need to rant on my blog, where I can do so safely and know that nobody reads it, as opposed to just THINKING it. And I could use italics too.
As a rant goes this one isn't overly impressive and I can help wondering "How the hell the dog sat on the keyboard?"
*WAVSIES*
Well, we had to visit the one in Dachau and a guy told us what they were doing there... well, let's just say the gas chambers were nice and healthy compared to some other things...
Lol, I can't help but feel when you called Samantha a tangerine was my fault...
*kisses Kallista*
I g2g now... night all...
*hugs Flo*
Night...
bye dragona
I think she left already but i think I'll say bye anyway.
COME BACK!
NO ONE PRETENDS TO PAY ATTENTION TO ME LIKE YOU DO!
I read your comments cluainn...It made me laugh when you said derek had dug himself into a hole with a one hit wonder girl band. I thought it was incredibly funny. In fact im smiling now. I also think YOUR incredibly funny...:D
i gtg now. byeee!!
Seeya Dragona!! And im glad that you told me about tangerines, cos now i can call people that, and if shes embarreseed about me calling her and tangerine, and that gets her to take that ridiculous muck off her face, than thank you Dragona. You did good. :|)
Bye Ayesha!
gtg,2.
I didnt realise you were physic piney! thats really cool! have any of ur visions come true? Tell me your life story!!! *grabs some popcorn and settles down, eagerly waiting*
whats a 5 pound bag of ground chuck? and why and how do you roll it into 20 little balls? *stares perplexed and utterly confused*
Hey all!
Cresent?
You still here?
No?
*cackles gleefully*
I
WILL
BE
THE
FIRST
ON
THE
NEW
PAGE
MINE!
PURPLE!
Purple rules the page!!!
Yay!
Will I be able to make the next page?
Just imagine it!
A whole page of Octaboona!
Am I nearly there yet?
Lets sing a song!
The Element Song
There's antimony
arsenic
aluminium
selenium
And hydrogen
and oxygen
and nitrogen
and rhenium
and nickel
neodymium
neptunium
germanium
Kallista you ruined the magic! Lol
and iron
oh no!
People!
Oh well.
Maybe another time.
Hey everybody!
*whispers quietly*
The magic is lost!
Hey :D I'm watching vampire diaries
Now you'll never know how the song ends :D
My computer is so slow.
Oh no!
I need to go now.
Night!
Alas the magic is gone *faints*
AHH faintings to dramatic *gets shot by a baguette*
You stupid piece of bread!
Nicolette deprived?
We have been learning about defficiencies in science lacking vitamins and minerals can kill you but lacking Nicolette is fine
Baguette screams as it is eaten, shoots me a second time before dying
AHH blood why is it red! Why not blue! Blues awesome!
Everyone has red hair at my school, red hair!
I want to get deep blue lowlights :D
Mum says no way tho :/
Hehe if being away for a few days makes you twitch what would a week or month do?
Watches amused
Is that the wizard of oz one? Because I found it pretty hilarious
Stares at Kallista unsure what to do
Urr-ah-um
throws popcorn at her
I am very morbid lately
If someone asks me a question depending on what it is I either answer
He/she/it died
Kill them/her/him/it
HELLO! IS ANYONE ON???
this morning i finished the 4th skul-man book~
Claps bemused
Aww Kallista your so awesome!
I'll have To go soon tho before mum turns the Internet off
then i passed out and dreamed about it. i cant quite remember the dream, but i think i died in it...
lalala~
let me just say it was a delightful surprise when Valkyrie used a frypan to beat the zombie to a pulp~
I had a very vivid da ja vu today
Gtg see you all tomorrow (hopefully)
i havent even started mortal coil, except reading the first chapter name...the first 4 books i all finished in a day. dark days in like half a day...
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