This Is Not A Blog Post

Be right back, my dog is barking...

Okay then, I'm back. Sorry about that. Sometimes Mable likes to bark at walls. All very understandable, considering she has a brain the size of a pea. Before I continue I must warn you, as it says in the title, this is not a Blog post. This is me, wasting time.

Writers love wasting time. Oh we love it so much. We sit at our desks, stare at our screens, contemplate the plot points and issues we have to tackle, and then we go and make ourselves a nice cup of coffee. 

(Well, other writers do. I don't drink coffee. Instead of making myself coffee, I check on my dogs instead. The end result is the same. Time wasted, I mean. Not a cup of coffee.)

Why am I wasting time? Because I need a break from editing the book and I can't justify actually stopping work- so instead I delay work. It's all very scientific. 

For those of you paying attention, I finished the first draft of KOTW last week. My editor loves it. He reckons it's the best book so far. So now I'm doing the rewrite, which isn't so much a rewrite as an edit-

- hold on, cat needs to let in-

Right, where was I? The edit

-sorry, second cat popped up on the windowsill, and then the third, and then I had to feed them, so I've done that, and I'm back-

is going well and it's going smoothly, primarily because there are no real structural changes that need to be made to the story. I might have to get rid of a tiny little subplot here or there, but mostly it's plain sailing. Really, most of the work stems from the bits I missed out in the first place, such as descriptions and the beginnings and endings of chapters. The plan is to have this edited by Tuesday, then work on it some more the following week, and eventually hand it over, ready to be printed, by the second week of May. Ooooh deadlines... they're so funny...

But I haven't JUST been working. Oh no. I found some time to relax and have some fun, too. Last Saturday night I went to dinner with a very pretty lady (who hates when I use her name in this Blog so I won't use it) and then on Monday we drove up to Cork and visited a school that was composed primarily of insane children. It was all very odd, but a lot of fun. 

Since then, though, I've been back at work, doing my very best to ignore everything going on around me. There are so many things I have to do when this book is finished that I literally don't know where to start. For example, remember those competition winners I have to send out signed copies of Death Bringer to? Yeah, haven't sent them yet. They've been sitting on my kitchen table for MONTHS. The fact is, at this point I'm thinking why bother send them off at all? Since I've waited this long to do anything about it, why don't I wait a teensy bit longer? At some stage over the summer I'll be getting my box of brand new Kingdom of the Wicked books, so I may as well include a signed copy of THAT as well. 

So congratulations, competition winners, you'll probably be getting TWO signed books AND The End Of The World. Yay!

Sigh... I can't put it off any longer. Must get back to work. The dogs aren't barking and all the cats are in and fed. There is nothing left to waste my time with.

I think I might have to start drinking coffee...

FINISHED!

I don't dance around kitchens. But if I did, I'd be dancing around my kitchen right now.

I'm finished the book.

It's only the first draft, granted. And I've finished it twelve days after I expected to be finished, also granted. And with the schedule so horrendously packed, I'm gonna have to start the edit by Sunday. But none of that takes away from the fact that I have finished Kingdom of the Wicked, and I am one happy writer-bunny.

My editor called this afternoon. He'd read most of it, and was just calling to give me the thumbs up. This, I have to say, was a relief. I've never written a book as quickly as I did this one, so I was worried that the quality might slip. Apparently it hasn't. This makes me happy. It's also LONGER than any of the others. Please keep in mind that the finished product might be significantly shorter, but at the moment this one is clocking in at 130,000 words- that's about 12,000 words longer than Death Bringer.

I am so, so drained. I need to play video games. I need to watch movies. I need to spend more than an hour away from my computer. But despite how drained I feel, I am buzzing with that wonderful, wonderful feeling of accomplishment that I always get when I finish a book. I am truly great.

LOLkitten

This is what we call a Guilty Blog Post.

Why do I feel guilty? Because it's been well over a week since the last time I posted anything. Also, this post is far too short to be considered a worthy way to spend your time. But I have an excuse. Writing. I'm writing. That's always a good excuse, right?

Deadlines deadlines deadlines. Onrushing. Oncrushing. Is oncrushing a word? No it isn't. But it should be.

I'm days away from finishing Kingdom of the Wicked. Days! I might even have had it finished tonight, but I spent yesterday at the Oxford Literature Festival (which was a lot of fun) so that set me back a little. But I'm close. So close. That wonderful feeling is starting up, that excitement that tells me I've almost finished another book. It's a fantastic feeling. Every writer knows it. That sense of accomplishment that floods over you despite any and all insecurities, despite knowing that you have weeks or months of edits and rewrites ahead of you... None of that matters, not when you're about to finish your first draft.

Days. Mere days. My editor is waiting for it.

I have to get back to work.

Goodbye, Amy Pond

My favourite redheaded Scots lass is leaving one of my favourite shows...

(Yes. You've guessed correctly. I simply don't have the time to write up a Blog post of normal length. I have finally got back into the flow of writing and everything is going really well after a few weeks of publicity and travel. It looks like I'll be getting Kingdom of the Wicked finished in time after all. Yay!)

Amy has quickly become my favourite Dr Who companion ever. I'll miss her spark, her accent, her pout, that policewoman's uniform...

Goodbye Amy...

And hello Jenna-Louise Coleman, who will be taking over as companion at Christmas.

All you Dr Who fans out there will know why this deserved a Blog post of its own.

And now, I'm going back to writing.

Book 7

Hello all.

Just got back from a TV thing that will be aired in Ireland sometime in May (I'll let you know when it's on so you can YouTube my awesomeness). It's been a long, amusing day, and all I want to do is relax, watch some TV, and generally chill out, so I'll be announcing the title of Book 7 tomorrow instead of today. Hope you understand.

As many of you know by now, every three books have a certain motif when it comes to titles. For instance, the middle trilogy was short, sharp and to the point. The final trilogy (sob) will have a completely different approach, as exemplified by the Greatest Title Ever Thought Up. I'm still writing the thing, and the deadline is fast approaching, so from tomorrow on it's full speed ahead. I only hope that the finished book lives up to what I'm calling it. Oh, I was totally joking about waiting until tomorrow to announce this, by the way. Sorry about that. Heh.

Ladies and gentlemen, in the final days of August of this year, the new Skulduggery Pleasant masterpiece will be released, and it will be called...

Skulduggery Pleasant: Kingdom Of The Wicked. 

Breaking News

And the Breaking News is...

Prepare for some Breaking News.

On Monday, on this Blog, I will be announcing the title of Book 7- which up to now has been known simply as "Paul". It will be an epic day to remember until the end of time, or for a few days afterwards (whichever comes first).

And in the interest of random topic changes, here's a picture.

Kony 2012

Hello there,

Do you have half an hour to spare? This doesn't have anything to do with me or my books. This has to do with changing the world. This has to do with helping people you've never met. At the end of the half hour, you don't have to do anything. You don't have to donate, or sign, or even share the video. You can if you want, but you don't have to. I'd just like you to KNOW. I'd like us all to be a part of this, to know what's going on in the world and to know that there are people who are determined to make a change. And I'd just like you to know the name Joseph Kony, who is more of a monster than I could ever create in my writing.