The Demon Road proofs have been sent out to critics and reviewers and bloggers and booksellers and all kinds of wonderful, wonderful people ahead of the release on August 27. I can't WAIT for this book to get onto shelves. I want to know what you think. I want to see how you react. I've been warned by my publishers not to expect the second series to be as big as the first — at least not initially — and let's be honest, Skulduggery is a hard act to follow. But this whole thing has become a giant experiment for me, and it's going to be fascinating to watch unfold.
There's gonna be some cool bits and pieces available too —"merch" or "swag" or "stuff" or "free things" like Demon Road badges and wristbands and maps and little pamphlets containing the first four chapters. That's kind of the point of this blog post, actually, because once those sample chapters are released, a plot detail that I haven't REALLY spoken about is going to be confirmed. So I'm going to discuss it here first, by providing to you the opening line of the book:
"Twelve hours before Amber Lamont's parents tried to kill her, she was sitting between them in the principal's office, her hands in her lap, stifling all the things she wanted to say."
I've talked about how this is a story about a girl being chased across America by a pack of demons. What I haven't said is that those demons are Amber's own parents.
I had this idea years ago, of a teenager being hunted by her mother and father. It resonated with me because this is so obviously WRONG, it is against the natural order of things for parents to want to harm their children. I'm lucky — I come from a good home, and I have loving parents, but I am well aware that not everyone is in the same position. This inversion of values is why the idea stuck with me, and so the whole trilogy has become an examination of family, and what it means to be loved and accepted for who and what you are.
I'm not going to say anything more about it right now, and all those wonderful people who are reading the proofs won't really be saying anything about it until the official release, but I genuinely cannot wait for you to get your hands on this book.
3,140 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 2201 – 2400 of 3140 Newer› Newest»MrBBWolf: *nods, going to the kitchen to see if the kettle has boiled*
*gets a hot water bottle from the cupboard*
*to Chris*
W-would the healing s-sigils h-help her..?
Chris: *shrugs* I don't see why not? *serves up wolfs coffee*
MrBBWolf: *kisses Chris quickly*
*fills up the hot water bottle, then carries it and his coffee into the living room*
Chris: *kisses and follows*
Rosa; thanks wolf *smiles weakly*
MrBBWolf: Y-you're welcome
*hands the hot water bottle over*
W-we might have some sigils that c-can help you..?
Rosa: *holds the hot water bottle close+ you've done enough for me, this'll be fine
MrBBWolf: I-if you're sure..
*settles back, pulling Chris onto his knee, sipping his coffee*
Chris : *is pulled and sits, smiling*
Rosa: I owe you two, I will definately help with the wedding
Tsu: Oh yeah, you were in the Hunteresses thing.
Chi: Best shot apart from Artemis and Apollo themselves.
Tsu: So who's your last friend?
Chi: Blair Black.
Tsu: She sounds...like a lot of fun.
Chi: She is. And pretty too.
Tsu: i'll be the judge of that.
Chi: I know you will...i might have to lock you up.
Tsu: Aww don't do that...
Chi: Try stay away from my female friends then.
Tsu: B-but, they're all female apart from Sebastian.
Chi: Exactly.
Tsu: *wimpers*
*Sends a letter to Blair*
*Opens a portal to Olympus again*
Chi: *thinks*
I have only invited girls, haven't I...
*tries to remember guys she knows*
Cam and Westley!
*furiously scribbles down a letter for them too*
How could i have forgotten...
Tsu: Uhhh...?
Chi: I hooked up with Cam one Summer when i was in my 20's.
Tsu: Hooked up with?
*raises an eyebrow*
Chi: Uh, yeah...Westley is his little brother.
*opens a portal and pushes it through*
And i think that does it. Want to come round blogland with me and invite everyone?
Tsu: Not really.
Chi: *grabs Tsu:
Too bad. Let's go.
Tsu: *sighs*
Chi: *makes a clone of herself to stay and look after the twins*
*heads for Sil's house*
*hugs Gemma tightly*
Could I have your Skype, Gem?
MrBBWolf: I-It's fine.
Sil: *is in her vault, not her house*
*call her*
*frowns slightly*
How much time have you guys spent in a mental institution?
Chris : hmmmm we haven't spoken to Sil in awhile
We should call her *calls sil*
(Gemma.Verlaque, Kassy.)
Chi: *frowns and getsout her phone*
*sees it's Sil and picks up*
Hey sis.
Tsu: Who is it?
Chi: *Glares at him*
Tsu: *sighs*
(None.)
(2hours... I was visiting)
((None.))
(@kassy none :)
Sil: *Chris's call will make that engaged noise*
*talking to Chi*
Hey, what should I get the twins? I mean all these modern toys and things.. it's ridiculous.
MrBBWolf: *kisses Chris' neck*
@Keiron Oh, dear :/
*sigh*
Fera? Is something wrong?
Private blog..
(What's wrong, Fera?)
Chi: Sil i don't even know what i'm getting the twins...sorry i can't help with that. My brother came for it though. He wants to meet you.
@Noelle *hugs gently*
Sil: Hmph. I'll have to wing it then.. brother?
Chris: mmmmmm not there ...
(FB Fera)
kas: not exactly a "problem" it's just something has been kinda weighing me down ^_^
gem: you can ask keiron :)
MrBBWolf: why not?
*smiles, kissing more*
Chris: rosa is here
Rosa: *has attention focused on the wall*
MrBBWolf: Oh..
*blushes*
S-sorry..
Rosa; you two carry on.. I'll be off now *stands up slowly*
MrBBWolf: N-no its okay.. y-You need to rest..
Yeah
Right.
Bye then.
Rosa; I shall reside in the spare room then, if you want
@Noelle I don't have access to your blog. *hugs again*
Liliana: Indeed. *she grins* Mmm... I am more elegant in my transportation.
Isabelle: You go elsewhere.
Bethany: *she nods, smiling* Good... That is good...
Lily: I'm... tired.
MrBBWolf: if you w-wish..
Rosa; *walks slowly to the spare room*
Yeah Noelle. No ones gonna read your blog cause you blocked everyone.
Kinda distant the now jai. I'll reply soon.
(Oh that blows it
Jess was putting her feet in my face and I said 'get your stinking feet out of my face'
And mum shouted at me and said that she is sick of the way I talk to people
I replied with 'I'm sick of people slapping me'
She then said that 'yes well you deserved it ' )
(Okay.
I can put up with your servers.
I can put up with you causing the end of Mass Effect 3 to be sub-par.
I can put up with your money grabbing schemes and your useless game client.
BUT
WHAT I CANNOT PUT UP WITH
IS YOU HAVING ME DOWNLOAD 12GB OF DATA
WHEN I HAVE A BLOODY DISK WHICH WON'T WORK BECAUSE OF YOU
STUPID EA
STUPID STUPID STUPID EA
WHY BIOWARE ASSOCIATES ITSELF WITH YOU I HAVE NO IDEA.)
(Sorry. Getting distracted with YouTube.
Noelle hasn't blocked everyone..)
MrBBWolf: *watches her go*
Onwa: Hmph. I am extremely elegant.
James: Elsa where?
Yes it is.
Manuel: *nods, opening the door, holding it for her*
I advise you rest.
Chris: *turns and sits on we the other wY* shall we start from where we left off?
MrBBWolf: *smiles, downing the rest of his coffee, setting the cup aside, swallowing*
Mmm.. y-yes please..
Chris: *smiles and kissez*
MrBBWolf: *kisses him back, pulling him closer*
@Dragona EA's response:
What in Davy Jones’ locker did ye just bark at me, ye scurvy bilgerat? I’ll have ye know I be the meanest cutthroat on the seven seas, and I’ve led numerous raids on fishing villages, and raped over 300 wenches. I be trained in hit-and-run pillaging and be the deadliest with a pistol of all the captains on the high seas. Ye be nothing to me but another source o’ swag. I’ll have yer guts for garters and keel haul ye like never been done before, hear me true. You think ye can hide behind your newfangled computing device? Think twice on that, scallywag. As we parley I be contacting my secret network o’ pirates across the sea and yer port is being tracked right now so ye better prepare for the typhoon, weevil. The kind o’ monsoon that’ll wipe ye off the map. You’re sharkbait, fool. I can sail anywhere, in any waters, and can kill ye in o’er seven hundred ways, and that be just with me hook and fist. Not only do I be top o’ the line with a cutlass, but I have an entire pirate fleet at my beck and call and I’ll damned sure use it all to wipe yer arse off o’ the world, ye dog. If only ye had had the foresight to know what devilish wrath your jibe was about to incur, ye might have belayed the comment. But ye couldn’t, ye didn’t, and now ye’ll pay the ultimate toll, you buffoon. I’ll shit fury all over ye and ye’ll drown in the depths o’ it. You’re fish food now.
Chris: *adds passion*
MrBBWolf: *matches his passion, smiling, lifting him and carrying him*
Chris; *wraps legs around him and continues to kiss *
MrBBWolf: *grins, biting his lip gently, rubbing his thumb back and forth along Chris's scales, finding the gentle scratch soothing*
*carries him to the bedroom*
(Keiron? Skype?)
Chris: *smiles as he does so*
MrBBWolf: *lays him on the bed*
Mm..
Chris; *lifts wolfs shirt off*
MrBBWolf: *smiles, pulling Chris's shirt off too*
*strokes his scales gently*
Mm.. I love how these feel..
Chris: *smiles* you are the first and only one to like them
MrBBWolf: they f-feel nice..
*smiles, continuing to stroke his chest gently*
Chris: *smiles^ thank you *pulls wolf towards him *
Would anyone like to talk? If you do, just email me.
MrBBWolf: *shifts, moving closer, kissing him passionately*
Chris; *kisses passionatelt*
MrBBWolf: *kisses him passionately back, holding him close, pushing his pants off*
Chris; mmmmm naughty boy *timeskip?*
*yes, time skip xD*
Chris: *sleeps on wolfs chest*
(Hehe we must leave something's to the imagination XD)
*yes we must :D*
MrBBWolf: *is asleep too, arms holding Chris closely*
Chris: *opens eyes slightly and smiles*
(Hehe
Awwwwww
I'm going out with a gentleman)
-.- .. .-.. .-.. / -- .
(What's he done?)
MrBBWolf: *murmurs, drooling slightly*
(Well I basically said I was stupid because when we met in comic con, my family went ahead of us as we were leaving so me and jack could kiss but we didn't
He said he knew, but I couldn't bring himself to ask
I said he didn't need to ask
But he thought it would be impolite otherwise XD)
Chris: *notices and giggles quietly$
No death. *hugs*
.- .-.. .-.. / - .... . / -.. . .- - ....
(I'm sorry
I don't get codes *frowns*)
(Nawwww. That's cute.)
MrBBWolf: *stirs slightly at the giggling*
But life is for living and death is for avoiding at all costs. *hugs again*
(He is *blushes*)
Chris: *bites his own lip in an attempt to be quiet*
.. .----. -- / --- -. / --. --- --- -.. / - . .-. -- ... / .-- .. - .... / -.. . .- - .... --..-- / .. -. / ..-. .- -.-. - / .. / -- . . - / ..- .--. / .-- .. - .... / .... .. -- / --- -. -.-. . / .- / .-- . . -.- .-.-.-
(You both are.)
MrBBWolf: *mumbles, blinking sleepily*
(I'm not
I'm a vicious little psycho XD)
Chris: *whispers* rise and shine darling
I must go to sleep. Good night.
*leaves a warm hug for everyone*
(You two together are!)
MrBBWolf: *smiles, tightening his hold on Chris*
*murmurs* morning..
(Night kas. *hugs back*)
(*huggles kas*)
(Awwww know we aren't >.< well I'm not atleast)
Chris; *chuckles* I hope we didn't disturb anyone
(Are too.)
MrBBWolf: *blushes*
I-I hope so too..
(Not)
Chris; *grinsi are you sure rosa fed you enough ?
(Are too!!!)
MrBBWolf: *smiles gently*
C-can't I want to m-make love to you without being h-hungry..?
(Not!!!!)
Chris; hehe of course you can *kisses his chest* and I'll happily accept
Bye Kas.
No translator now yeh.
(Are too!!!)
MrBBWolf: *sighs happily*
Mm..
(Not!!!!! )
Chris; I love you wolf
Liliana: Of course you are. But not at travelling through different realms. *she grins* Anyway, shopping.
Isabelle: How am I supposed to know? No one has ever done it before.
Bethany: ... Is wine strong?
Lily: *she walks in, nodding* ... Could I sleep in the room I did before?
There are morse code translators online...
...
sorry to burst your bubble
he was the only one commenting on it though.
.... - - .--. ---... -..-. -..-. -- --- .-. ... . -.-. --- -.. . .-.-.- ... -.-. .--. .... .. .-.. .-.. .. .--. ... .-.-.- -.-. --- -- -..-. - .-. .- -. ... .-.. .- - --- .-. .-.-.- .... - -- .-..
That's probably because no one realized that it was Morse code.
(Are!
*nods and Noelle*)
MrBBWolf: I love you too Chris.
Onwa: Mm.. perhaps
James: no one?
Its not the strongest alcohol, i think its quite weak.
Manuel: Of course.
*closes the front door*
It was also a sarcastic yeh.
(I'm off to bed now
If I can't get internet, be here in a week!)
Chi: Yeah. My twin brother Tsubaki. I have a brother. We met for the first time properly a few months ago. And i'll have to just wing it too.
Tsu: the better-looking twin.
Chi: shut up, Tsu.
(Night Chloe.)
(Night Chloe.)
Sil: oh, cool. Where are you?
Hmm... Well.
-... . -.-. .- ..- ... . / - .... . -. / .. / -.-. .- -. / -... . / .- ... / --. .-. .- .--. .... .. -.-. / .- ... / .. / .-- .- -. - / .- -... --- ..- - / .... --- .-- / .. / .-- .- -. - / - --- / ... .-.. .. - / -- -.-- / - .... .-. --- .- - / .- -. -.. / -.. .-. .- .. -. / -- -.-- ... . .-.. ..-. / .- -. -.. / .- .-.. -- --- ... - / -. --- / --- -. . / -.-. .- -. / -.-. .- .-. .
do you ever just unlock your phone look at it relock it and keep doing that hoping for a message...
(*sighs* Okay 'kill me' Just because you're speaking in morse shouldn't mean you can be any more graphic, that'd be like skipping to Morse code instead of time skipping.)
.. / .-- --- ..- .-.. -.. / -. --- - / -- .. -. -.. / - .... .- - --..-- / - .... . -. / --- -. .-.. -.-- / - .... . / .--. . .-. ... .. ... - . -. - / -.-. .- -. / .-. . .- -.. / - .... . / --. --- --- -.. / ... - ..- ..-. ..-. .-.-.-
Well, not that no one cared, just that no one was given the chance to care.
And besides,
Why post the graphic stuff if you think everyone is indifferent?
For me, i'm rather bipolar in thought. I'm a rational person, but my depression is simultaneously irrational. I know that people care about me- but I don't feel it. I post graphic things that I wish would happen to try to convince myself that people do care.
So..
yeah.
Chi: *looks around*
We're in the clearing, Sil. Are you gonna come meet him?
.. / .- -- / -.-. .- .-.. .-.. .. -. --. / ..-. --- .-. / .... . .-.. .--. / .-- .. - .... / - .... . / .... --- .--. . / - .... .- - / -. --- / --- -. . / .... . .- .-. ... --..-- / .--. . --- .--. .-.. . / -.-. .- .-. . / .- -... --- ..- - / -.-- --- ..- / - .... . -.-- / --- -. .-.. -.-- / .--. .-. . - . -. -.. / - --- / .-- .. - .... / -- .
((Ummm I can't generally be botehred to translate Morse code, personally. If you really want me to, just give me a nod and I will.))
Sorry I'll stop being a burden.
(Not really here. Wanting to WhatsApp, do physics and watch a documentary all at once. We'll see how that goes. XD)
(Personally I think I'd be raged against if I posted sex scenes in morse code.
And although I don't know who you are I can reassure you people care about you.)
Sil: sure.
*opens a portal, stepping through and joining chi*
01001001 00100111 01101101 00100000 01110011 01110101 01110010 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01110000 01100101 01101111 01110000 01101100 01100101 00100000 01100011 01100001 01110010 01100101 00100000 01100001 01100010 01101111 01110101 01110100 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01101101 01101111 01110010 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100001 01101110 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01100001 01110010 01100101 00100000 01110011 01100001 01111001 01101001 01101110 01100111 00101110 00100000 01001001 00100111 01101101 00100000 01100001 01101100 01110011 01101111 00100000 01110011 01110101 01110010 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01100001 00100000 01110000 01100001 01110010 01110100 00100000 01101111 01100110 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01100100 01101111 01100101 01110011 01101110 00100111 01110100 00100000 01100010 01100101 01101100 01101001 01100101 01110110 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100001 01110100 00101110 00100000 01001001 01100110 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01101000 01100001 01110110 01100101 00100000 01100100 01100101 01110000 01110010 01100101 01110011 01110011 01101001 01101111 01101110 00101100 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01100110 01100101 01100101 01101100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01110111 01100001 01111001 00101100 00100000 01001001 00100000 01100011 01100001 01101110 00100000 01100010 01100101 01110100 00100000 01110100 01100101 01101110 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01101111 01101110 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01100001 00100000 01110000 01100001 01110010 01110100 00100000 01101111 01100110 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01101011 01101110 01101111 01110111 01110011 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01101110 01101111 01110100 00100000 01110100 01110010 01110101 01100101 00101110 00100000 01001001 01110100 00100111 01110011 00100000 01101100 01101001 01101011 01100101 00100000 01100010 01100101 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01110100 01101111 01110010 01101110 00100000 01101001 01101110 00100000 01110100 01110111 01101111 00101110
Honestly, I don't know what to tell you but that there has never been a person whom I have heard of who has talked about their death- willingly to other people- with the intention of being ignored.
Hell, I talk about my death with the purpose of being comforted. I'll admit it- and it isn't anything to be ashamed of. Wanting comfort, solace, affirmation, is not bad.
Personally, I'm sure that you want the comfort, or else you wouldn't have posted in the first place.
Which isn't wrong of you, I reiterate.
01010000 01100101 01101111 01110000 01101100 01100101 00100000 01110000 01110010 01100101 01110100 01100101 01101110 01100100 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01100011 01100001 01110010 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 01111001 00100000 01110011 01101101 01101001 01101100 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 01111001 00100000 01101100 01100001 01110101 01100111 01101000 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 01111001 00100000 01110100 01101000 01110010 01101111 01110111 00100000 01100011 01100001 01110011 01110101 01100001 01101100 00100000 01100100 01100101 01100001 01110100 01101000 00100000 01110100 01101000 01110010 01100101 01100001 01110100 01110011 00101110 00101110 00101110 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 01111001 00100000 01110111 01100001 01101110 01110100 00100000 01101101 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01100100 01101001 01100101 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01001001 00100111 01101101 00100000 01100111 01101111 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01100111 01101001 01110110 01100101 00100000 01101001 01110100 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 01101101 00101110 00101110 00101110 00100000 01001001 00100000 01101000 01100001 01110100 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 01101101 00101100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 01111001 00100000 01100100 01101111 01101110 00100111 01110100 00100000 01110101 01101110 01100100 01100101 01110010 01110011 01110100 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01110111 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01101001 01110100 00100111 01110011 00100000 01101100 01101001 01101011 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 01111001 00100000 01110100 01101000 01101001 01101110 01101011 00100000 01101001 01110100 00100111 01110011 00100000 01100110 01101001 01101110 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 01111001 00100000 01110100 01101000 01101001 01101110 01101011 00100000 01101010 01110101 01110011 01110100 00100000 01100010 01100101 01100011 01100001 01110101 01110011 01100101 00100000 01001001 00100000 01110011 01101101 01101001 01101100 01100101 00100000 01101001 01110100 00100000 01100100 01101111 01100101 01110011 01101110 00100111 01110100 00100000 01100111 01100101 01110100 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01101101 01100101 00101110 00101110 00101110 00101110 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 01111001 00100000 01110100 01101000 01101001 01101110 01101011 00100000 01100010 01100101 01100011 01100001 01110101 01110011 01100101 00100000 01101001 00100111 01101101 00100000 01100110 01101001 01101110 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01101001 00100111 01101101 00100000 01100110 01101001 01101110 01100101 00101110 00101110 00101110 00100000 01001001 00100111 01101101 00100000 01101110 01101111 01110100 00100000 01100110 01101001 01101110 01100101 00100000 01001001 00100000 01110111 01100001 01101110 01110100 00100000 01101000 01100101 01101100 01110000 00100000 01100010 01110101 01110100 00100000 01001001 00100000 01100100 01101111 01101110 00100111 01110100 00100000 01110111 01100001 01101110 01110100 00100000 01101000 01100101 01101100 01110000 00100000 01001001 00100000 01110111 01100001 01101110 01110100 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01100110 01100101 01100101 01101100 00100000 01101000 01100001 01110000 01110000 01111001 00100000 01100001 01100111 01100001 01101001 01101110 00100000 01100010 01110101 01110100 00100000 01001001 00100000 01100100 01101111 01101110 00100111 01110100 00100000 01101011 01101110 01101111 01110111 00100000 01101000 01101111 01110111 00101110
@Jai: You totally would be raged against. -_-
I don't know what they're writing, though, but if it's graphic in a depressive kind of way then sympathy tends to play into peoples' judgements.
Also, y'know, when they object to your roleplay they normally obecjt to your roleplay with Sophia, and thhose who dislike Sophia tend to dislike her intensely and also not be objective in their complaints.
*still doesn't know the context but what Noelle's saying sounds rather good*
*will go and translate that Morse code now because it's seeming fairly important*
If you would like perhaps some advice..
I would recommend starting a blog where you can just pour all of your thoughts and emotions down. I have one currently, but i have made it inaccessible save a select few because there was some harassment occurring towards me-
however
if you perhaps made your account accessible, and posted a link to your blog, people will be more than willing to help you out, or comfort you, and love on you a bit. Trust me. This place is a good place to find people who will help you out. Just be careful, making friends is as easy as making enemies.
My point is, I suppose, is that if you allow people to try to comfort you, and you allow them to tell you that they love you, without the automatic "you dont love me dont lie to me" response, it is a good start to loving yourself.
. . .
Yeah, that was fairly important.
(*can't be bothered translating any of jt on her phone*)
Chi: Hey sis!
*hugs her tightly*
*Steps back and oushes Tsubaki forward*.
This is my brother Tsubaki Asahina.
Tsu: Uh, hi.
*sticks his hand out to shake hers*
(Guys, I'd translate the binary, but my phone can only handle so much, and it's lagging like fck
@star yeah.)
it's not important at all Star. Thanks Adra... I might... I feel like it'd just get ignored and they'd think i was lying so you know... I don't really want to waste such precious time left on earth with something that won't help when they won't care.
I want to not be ignored but it happens which feels real it feels like a little bit of me has been discarded never to be looked at... almost none of me is left... I do my best I show people what they want to see.
I want help... but I don't want attention.
(Aaaaand it just restarted the YouTube video..
Noelle I'll finish watching it tomorrow when I don't feel like throwing my phone out the window.)
Sil: *hugs her tightly back*
*grins at Tsu*
Hi.
*takes his hand, yanking him forwards, rocketing a knee up between him legs, pushing him face first to the floor, getting him in an arm lock and kneeling on his back, all before he could say "nice to"*
@Kill me: Eh. Importance is subjective.
In my experience, people have greater capacity to care than I usually expect them too. And if it mgiht help and might not . . . it's better than not trying at all? :)
@Jai: -_- It's moments like these when I'm sooooooooooooo glad I have a laptop.
Well.. I would certainly suggest a blog.
Also, here's a protip: you are less likely to be ignored, or feel ignored, etc. if you make things with an "I feel", instead of an "I am"
For example, you said "they won't care", but if you change your language to "i feel that they don't care", then..
well..
yeah.
And as well: this could give you insight, it could not, but if I were to say what you just said, in the same context, I would say, "because of my depression, I feel like I would be ignored, and that others would think I was lying, so you know."
So-
Because everyone knows, rationally, that they are loved. Just that people with depression tend to not be able to feel it, but they know that it is there, but they can't feel it- it's the fight between emotions and rationality. This may be assuming too much, and please tell me if I am wrong, but I believe that you do know that people love you- but I'm guessing that you just can't feel the love- which is okay and understandable- but that doesn't mean that you shouldn't let them try to prove it to you.
Chi: Sil what the hell?!
Tsu: *winces slightly*
S-she's fast.
*his pain keeps trying to heal*
Thank you, Noelle . . .
(I'm going to bed. Goodnight.)
Oh- also
Attention is healthy
Just a little piece of information there.
Also also
People are more likely to help when you don't make statements like "everyone hates me" and "no one believes me", because that is accusing someone of doing something that, to you, is negative. Because of the accusing diction, people are less likely to help.
Really, I would just try to alter your way of saying things. Little changes makes a lot of difference. People are willing to help- they want to show you love and affection, but there is a tendency of humans to go to defense systems if they feel like they are being threatened.
Goodnight, Gemma. :)
*nods again to Noelle, because she is giving good advice adn also being rather educational and giving me stuff to think about and yeah*
Sil: *smiles innocently, sat on his back*
I'm just saying hello.
*let's go of his arm, getting off of him, standing up*
*offers him a hand up*
Welcome to blogland.
I can't claim to be depressed... i've never been diagnosed.
On my blog, I've written a lot of poetry (which is probably really shitty)
but sometimes you just have to write uncensored, unproofreaded, open-floodgates stuff. I sometimes just write what I feel, and post it.
So
I could come to this blog and say "none of you love me because I'm ignored all the time and I'm hated on all the time"
And no one would answer positively, because I'm blaming them based on how I feel as a result of my depression.
I could also come on and say "I'm like a spider- every time something gets close to me, I curl up in a ball so that I protect myself"
And people will be much more receptive- because you are focusing on yourself (which sounds rather conceited, but trust me- it isn't in this case) and you aren't attacking others.
SO
maybe thinking on these terms will be more therapeutic for you.
I feel like no one loves me I know people say they do I hear them I just don't believe them.
@Kill me: Have you considered finding a diagnosis?
(Note - that is one of those social phrasings that isn't meant to be taken literally. I'm sure it's run through your head. What is actually means is 'let's move onto the subject of you finding one. Any thoughts you want to share with me/us on that front?'
Except the inaccurate social one sounds nice. The literal one sounds ratehr demanding. You don't have to share any thoughts with us if you don't want to.)
(I apologise for my inability to speak . . .)
(@Noelle trust me - NONE of your poetry is bad. I loathe your poetry (in a good, I'm jealous of your ability to express yourself way, I think your poetry is amazing.)
@Noelle; I don't think it's shitty at all (I mean, I don't know much about poetry, but still, my opinion is an opinion.)
Well- depression doesn't have to be large-scale, and if you entertain the idea of suicide, then there must be something wonky. Sometimes, it isn't even really about labels, sometimes just feeling like shit is okay too.
And yes- those comments are more along the lines of what I mean...
And then now, I can say that- people do love you- and I know that it is hard to believe that they do, and I'm not asking you to believe if you can't. I'm saying that, whether or not you can feel it, people to love you- they care for you, even if, like me, they don't know who you are. They want to comfort you and hold you and stroke your hair and snuggle. They want to do all of these good things- these nice things- just for you.
And it's okay if you don't feel it. I don't always feel it either.
But the mere-exposure effect that you will have to people who want you to be happy and safe and healthy should make you, if by the smallest degree, more content
*nods at Jai*
*is not jealous of Noelle's poetry because I can't do poetry* *is usually fine when otehr people have abilities I don't* *usually gets jealous when others have abilities that I do XD*
(*nods at what Noelle is saying*
*can't really contribute..*
@star I get jealous quite easily xD)
*more nodding towards Noelle*
(Sorry, I just, I never know what to say in these situations. It's not that I can't be bothered to say anything for myself, it's just that I could never say anything that would be much good and Noelle is saying a lot of stuff that is much good.)
@Jai: I thought I didn't really get jealous easily, but the other day I realised that my jealously actually just works in really weird ways . . . XD
(@star most of you works in weird ways..)
((Perhaps- i mostly feel that it isn't good because what I post is first-draft material. I haven't been revising them. I just... Spew and post- I don't even re-read.))
For example, Morse (because that is what I am calling you), I have a friend named Aretha. Inside of her head is many people, and every day, I talk to one of those people named Alastair. He tells me... A good twenty times a day that he loves me, and on my private blog with him, I have a separate post just as a space for us to talk..
Another one of Aretha's people is niccolo, who tells me that he loves me all the time too, and we virtually cuddle and play, and all of these people- Aretha included- listen to me, and just... Hug me and tell me that I'm loved. It's quite nice. It makes me happy.
And I can assure you that you could find someone on this blog to make such an.. Intimate and loving relationship with. There are always people open. People love to talk. You'll just have to be willing to go into a deeper relationship.
But my point is, is that there are many people who want to be to you, what Aretha &c is to me.
oh my gosh i actually get to meet Aretha on Wednesday and-
well
it's just something that i am looking forward to.
I don't know how to even start. I feel like i'm in the middle of something all these things fighting to push them away to get out and the keep smothering me... I don't want to go to the doctors... i'm scared.
@ fabi @ star @ kessie (if you are online) JESY JUST GOT ENGAGED AND I NEED TO LET EVERYONE KNOW BECAUSE I'M FREAKING OUT OKAY I'LL DISAPPEAR AGAIN SORRY IF I INTERRUPTED ANYTHING I LOVE YOU GUYS
(@Noelle that makes sense. Most people do proof read, but that just.. censors it in my opinion?)
(Hi/bye Mara! Congrats to this Jesy!
@Noelle I'm glad you're meeting her/them. I hope you have a good time :)
*continues to acknowledge Noelle's words in a positive manner*
(@Jai: I know. :P)
@Noelle: Mmh. Well, in that case, your non-first-draft material must be phenomenal. :)
Anyway, Morse-
I hope my suggestions and words can be taken with a grain of salt, and I hope that they can be beneficial to you. You don't have to feel what people say, just give them the opportunity to say it. Honestly, it makes you feel better...
I must go now, I'm having pangs in my stomach. I've been trying to eat healthier (because starving nor purging works (side note: purging is so HARD, like- I've tried on numerous occasions recently, and DAMN is it difficult) because MORE fat accumulates when you starve yourself) so I've just... Both cut back on the calories, exercised, and eat healthy. Between those three, I should be on the right track.
Fuck, I really want a Hostess honey bun
(@Noelle that sounds much better than starving yourself. Thank you. Bye :)
@Noelle: :) Omg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :) :) :) I hope you (the multiple-people-version of 'you') have a great time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :) :)
@Kill me: :/ *hugs*
I think going to the doctor's may help a lot, but I understand that IS very scary and a big step.
@Marararara: Yay!
I mean, I'm kinda 'meh' on the whole wedding front, but yay for her adn I hope that makes her happy! :)
Bye!
(I should learn how to cook.. there's a large possibly that next year my family aren't taking me on holiday with them (I'm fine with that) and I'm gonna have to set alarms to remind me to eat.)
@Noelle: :) Yeah, that sounds like a pretty good idea, in my opinion, and possibly the best thing you cuold do in the situation.
:) Bye.
Oh, one more thing, then, Morse-
It's okay to be scared, or unsure. It would be strange if you were sure.
I always suggest looking up counselors in your community, or asking your parents if you can see a Doctor. ((I know this can be a problem sometimes, as some parents are verbally/mental-emotionally/physically abusive, but if your parents love you- or tell you that they love you- they will take you. Just say "Mom, Dad, may I please see a Doctor? I've been feeling really sad lately and want to talk to someone about it". And if they say no, I recommend teen programs (like Ala-teen,but thats a little different) in your community where you can talk to people. Or, schools have counselors. Teachers are also helpful.))
Basically, there are always places to look- it might not be where you expected either.
And you don't have to see a doctor, if you don't want to. But it would be best to find a place where you can feel safe with other people. Even if it is something like a club at a library.
@Jai: Hmm . . . I WOULD offer to remind you when to eat, but I'm not the most reliable person . . .
You don't need to learn how to cook to cook most food. :) I would also offer to help you cook, but I don't really know how to cook either. Everything I know can be learnt just by reading the packet, so . . . XD Yeah.
Also, if you need help finding a place where you can feel comfortable, please feel free to email me, Morse. There's a link on my profile. I can help you find somewhere.
Really, I have to go now. I need a slight sabbatical to calm down, so I'm going to watch YouTube videos to try to keep my head off the pangs in my tummy.
(@star I'm usually the one reminding you to do stuff xD
I'll remember to eat when my stomach complains, it's just I ALWAYS forget to eat lunch and sometimes breakfast, and I'd rather eat semi healthily than packet food..
I can make spagbol and chicken curry and chicken wraps.. and pasta..)
Pss: I've also been telling myself to only eat when my tummy rumbles. If my tummy doesn't rumble, don't eat.
So like
so i don't snack because I'm bored or something
(Bye Noelle :) See you/talk soon.)
Thank you... Is all I can say...
I cannot email you...
(@Noelle still better than starving yourself.)
*nods at Noelle* :) That sounds fairly good, imo.
@Jai: XD Yes.
Hmmmmmmmm . . . that's about as much as I can make, incidentally. XD
And vegetables come in a packet, Jai. As do potatos. *nods*
(@star true :)
@Jai: Yep.
And pie!
And like, that gorgeous Southern Fried chicken you get from Aldi.
And like, pasta.
And like, like, Heinz Tomato soup (which is, like, the best tinned soup there is. All the other tinned soup just tastes of tinned soup).
You know, I should probably use all this time home to learn how to cook food . . .
. . . Oh wait, my family are gonna be home now. *frowns*
adrasdosdark477@gmail.com
^^ in case that is what you meant.
If you can't email me for other reasons.. Then I would suggest you go through with what I have advised, if you would like to, or if you think that it could help a bit. And maybe you could ask someone else to be your email buddy. You could be like "Hey _______, can I email you when I'm sad?"
And they'll be like "fuck yeah"
OKAY
yeesh, I'm really bad at committing myself.
Youtube.
Yes.
Bye
(@star xD)
:) Bye, Noelle. :) :)
*is happy to be anyone's email buddy*
*tends to email fairly regularly, apart from sometimes when I like decide to not email people for a few days for no reason and then am like 'wtf why am I doing this I miss my email buddies', or the times when I forget I have to reply, but y'know*
Haha I wrote a paragraph ranting about how long this guy spent gettign sandstone off this one skeleton (EIGHT YEARS) and -
[7/19/2015, 23:41] Lizzie: ((Dude. Fuck))
[7/19/2015, 23:42] Lizzie: ((Cat threw the phone at me cause u wrote all that))
[7/19/2015, 23:42] Me: ((XD))
[7/19/2015, 23:42] Lizzie: ((Not funny she threw it at me))
((Apparently we're sleeping now. Fours?))
*claps*
*has read Noelle's comments and is clapping in a good way*
why would someone do that?
Right better go. Season 2 of Agents of SHIELD after I drag my little self to eat.
(As someone who can almost fluently read morse code, I ask that the same rules to apply no matter how you are speaking concerning graphic content whether it be sex or violence.)
Liliana: What colours for dresses? Black, purple and silver?
Isabelle: Nope. Not one.
Bethany: Okay... I have a low capacity for alcohol.
Lily: Thank you... I could maybe make us some food too?
I love Pope Francis' liberalism.
He preaches love, and doesn't dictate.
Bless him.
*Isnt Christian* *Still can appreciate him*
*Is very liberal*
*Democracy*
*Is not a fan of Republican Conservativism*
*Hates it ugh*
Well
I am feeling like crap at the moment...
I'm trying so hard to get my weight down.
I lost 5 in water weight yesterday- and in trying to get to 135
If I can do that, I can do anything
...
Yeah today isn't good
*Is going to her private blog*
*So that she will be safe-ish*
*From the many who want to yell at her*
it was just that I can't not that I don't have it btw.
That's what I mean... I had the ability to get it... I just can't mail people.
Who?
@Mara OMG YAY! Congrats to Jesy. :-)
@Noelle I did a social justice/art project on cyberbullying late last quarter.
And yeah, it makes sense for you to be sad. I'm sorry this is happening. :-/
I and most others here do care about you and your well-being, though.
[hugs]
@Other people Just so you all know, I will have difficulty responding to any sort of typewritten communication for a while, as my wrist seems to be getting a bit worse. Please don't be offended if I seem to only acknowledge a few people.
@Noelle again It's super cool that you and Ari get to meet up! I hope you both have fun. :-)
I'm sorry, I'm not at liberty to say. If I do, I'll just get more hate.
I just wanted to know if I was on that last. I wouldn't hate you if I was.
No, you aren't. I just met you, I think.
You just met this version of me... the version who doesn't have a facade.
Hello.
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