Hello there,
It is I, your humble Golden God, here to brighten up your day with another one of my electrifying entries into this accursed Blog-thing. I'm not entirely sure what I'm going to write about, however. Ever since I finished the book I've been kind of... aimless.
Not ENTIRELY aimless, of course. I did have things to do once I'd finished- other bits and pieces of writing to finish off. But I've finished those now, and so I'm back to being a little bit lost as to what to do.
I've been visiting a few schools- which is something I don't get to do a whole lot of anymore during my official tours. When you're a writer starting off, school events are ALL you do, because you need to reach as many people as possible and get them interested in your books. But once you reach a certain level of awesomeness, visiting individual schools is not really the best use of your limited time. So bigger school events are planned, where multiple schools come to a theatre or hall, and a lot more public signings are scheduled. By this stage, it's all about meeting the readers, and making it easier for the readers to meet you.
But throughout the year I tend to visit schools in and around Dublin, organised by teachers or librarians or parents. It's all about "this person knows that person who knows my cousin's friend", and that's how they get in touch. I can't do an awful lot of these smaller school visits, because I don't have the time, but for some reason I've been visiting a school a week for the past month or two. Which is, I admit, NOT the best use of my time when I have deadlines as tight as my deadlines have been. But hey.
So, the week before last I was at a school in Lusk. Last week I was at a school in Swords. And this afternoon I was at a school in Sutton. Next week I'll be at a school somewhere in Cork and then- THEN- I'll stop. No more. I need a break. I've got my Australia/NZ tour in August, my Ireland/UK tour in September, and before all that I think I have to pop over to LA for a bit. I need a BREAK! I need to do normal things! I need to stop signing autographs!
Ah, the life of a tortured artist...
Oh, and before I go, something you MAY be interested in. This Friday I will be posting again. Why, you ask? What could I possibly have to post mere days after THIS wonderful entry?
Oh not much. I don't expect there to be much writing involved, actually. Just a single image, perhaps. A single, solitary image appearing on the accursed Blog, sometime on Friday... What could it be? Something to do with the new book? Some kind of image to do with the new book?
It's a mystery, that's what it is. I guess you'll just have to check the Blog on Friday to find out.
Posts
About Derek
- Derek Landy
- Derek Landy writes the Skulduggery Pleasant series because getting a proper job is so overrated.
4,874 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 3601 – 3800 of 4874 Newer› Newest»HI FLAME! HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN AN AGE!!!
Cool title Zath:)
Damn, bb in 15.
You don't sound at all happy to see me Zath, do you?
Hey Star.
Wassup Nix.
Still going on about the school? Good. I like it. Hello Flame.
Depends. Your up or my up, cause your up is my ground
Valkyrie groaned, and sat up. "I told you it was a trap," she said.
"No, you said it looked like it was a trap," Skulduggery corrected. "That's completely different."
He helped her up as a door opened behind them and Sadistica Tortura walked through, an unsettling smile on her lips.
Skulduggery stiffened and cocked his head sideways, fixing his hat. He casually reached for his revolver, subtly slipping his left hand into his jacket. Sadistica saw him and shook her head. “Please, don’t. Let’s not make this harder than it has to be,” She spoke, well pronounced. Sadistica Tortura was wearing the attire of a tight pinstripe dress that came down to her knees, which surprisingly, didn’t make it hard for her to walk. Her black hair and icy blue eyes made her look as if she were scolding someone. “It is nice to see you again, detective.”
Skulduggery sighed, one of his more dramatic ones. “I would say the same, but, really it isn’t. With you there always comes trouble. What do you want?”
Valkyrie Cain subdued a giggle and looked at Skulduggery. “Who is this?”
Skulduggery looked at the walls, which were now covered in what looked like metal bars, in fact, they were metal bars. “It was a cunning trick Sadistica. Not your usual style, simplicity made it hard to be obvious, yet, still cunning. Making the room into a cell that restricts magic. I give you due.” Skulduggery turned Val, “She’s Sadistica Tortura. She was on Melevolants side in the war. She is a dangerous foe, cunning, smart and a brilliant actress. I spent years chasing her, yet somehow, she always got away. And now, she has us trapped.” Skulduggery stood up tall and smiled, hands behind his back.
Valkyrie just said, “Oh.”
Sadistica laughed, “Oh, you make me feel so… What’s the word?”
“Powerful?” Val blurted out.
The woman smiled and continued, “That’s it, powerful. But you obviously do not know why I have trapped you. Do you?”
Skulduggery shifted uncomfortably. “Would it have anything to do with… a dog by any chance?”
Sadistica ignored him and continued her rant, “I know your secrets. I have proof, that what happened on O’Connell Street the other day were entirely both your faults and I want you to do something.” She smiled and repeated, “I know your secret.”
Valkyrie gasped and couldn’t speak. Skulduggery just stared unmoving down to the ground.
“How did you find out, and what the hell do you want??” Val demanded, raising her fist in a threat like motion.
“Who cares?” Skulduggery said. “Sadistica Tortura, I’m afraid you are finally under arrest.”
Sadistica laughed, “You are in no position to make an arrest, remember, I’m in control.”
It was Skulduggery’s turn to laugh. “Let me give you your first lesson in detecting. Never leave a man with his hands behind his back.” He revealed a phone and laughed again. “It always turns out worse for you. Cleavers” He called. A group of five Cleavers entered the room and grabbed Sadistica. They dragged her out uneasily, as she kept kicking and screaming.
Is that your entry Flame?
back!!
good title Zath!!
Hi Flame!!
good entry, im scared now
I still haven't thought of anything!
I think mine's as good as it's going to get
Printing off 15 pages isn't as fun as it looks...
Ok, first, Who are you Helena, HAve i met you? *is slightly confuzzled*
Nix, if i win, im gonna say ha. ps, im awesomerester. Yeah,. thats a word.
Miss Cain, I havent met you. Therefore, Im gonna say, 'HI!'
Mine is alright...
its pretty good if i say so myself
but then i look at others and think
crap, im not going to be one of the winners
Zath.. Are you okay?
Hi Flame!!
And, yes, its my entry. Which hasnt been entered yet. I need to widdle it down to 500 words. So, 18 have to go.
Back
Am I okay? Nope, not in the slightest.
Oh, don’t be silly Flame, I’m not unhappy to see you at all.
@Flame
you made a mistake when you said Skulduggery turned Val
Hi Willow!!
Well yes Flame I believe I have met you... A while back... Weird, I think I recognise you from somewhere else... Oh well, I probably just attempted to murder you! :D
has anyone noticed that mistake???
Stupid multiple accounts
Yes, I did. What's with so many unhappy people on here?
beats me
i just had chocolate
*finishes the last of the chocolate*
Things happened. Crap things. Thing that make people unhappy.
Are you...
like school!!
*groans at thought*
I've been called weird 5 fives today, should I be paying attention to it? (twice from my relatives I never see.)
does anyone want to read my entry??
Sure Miss Cain.
Helena i have a feeling i know you too.
Damn.
You're not val. Amanda?
Just forget about me..
*talks quietly to himself*
Yes, Cain, i would.
Valkyrie groaned, and sat up. "I told you it was a trap," she said.
"No, you said it looked like it was a trap," Skulduggery corrected. "That's completely different."
He helped her up as a door opened behind them and Sadistica Tortura walked through, an unsettling smile on her lips.
She glanced at Skulduggery, then at Valkyrie, then back at Skulduggery.
“Hello, so, what are we doing here?”
Valkyrie rolled her eyes. For once, just once, she wished people would think of other questions to ask. Maybe one about dogs or batteries. Anything other than that question.
“Hello Sadistica, I’m pretty sure you know why we are here,” Skulduggery said.
“Do I?”
“You do.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
“So, I don’t?”
This was driving Valkyrie insane. “Shut up Sadistica.”
Sadistica glared at Valkyrie. “You don’t tell me what to do.”
“Yeah, whatever.”
“That’s some attitude.”
Valkyrie looked at Skulduggery for help but he just ignored her. She promised herself, if they got out, she was going to hit him. Sadistica clapped her hands and they faced her.
“Now, why don’t we come in?”
She opened the door and went in. Skulduggery and Valkyrie followed. It was if they were somewhere totally different. The whole of the room was pink. Valkyrie stared in horror at anything that was pink. Which was basically the whole room. Sadistica sat down in a pink chair in the middle room.
“Make yourself at home,” she said. “Please sit.”
Skulduggery and Valkyrie sat.
“Now, what shall we talk about?”
“How did you find out about Lord Vile?” Valkyrie blurted out.
Skulduggery shook his head and Valkyrie was pretty sure she heard him mutter something about not having considered what his partner would turn out in future. Sadistica, on the other hand, answered.
“Who doesn’t? I mean, everyone by now would know about what happened in Ireland.”
Skulduggery spoke up, “What exactly does everyone know?”
“Well, the basics, like how Lord Vile killed High Priest Tenebrae, that Melancholia St Clair is still alive and that the Death Bringer title is awaiting a name.”
She stopped and sipped some water out of a pink cup.
“But what they know is different from what I know. I know that it was actually Melancholia who killed High Priest Tenebrae with her death bubble, that you both broke into the temple and, as a bonus for me, both your little secrets. Although they would not be considered little, would they?
Valkyrie sat there in stunned silence. Skulduggery stood and summoned a flame into his hand, “Are you going to come with me and my partner quietly or do I have to hit you?”
Valkyrie stood to join him and gathered shadows in to the palm of her hand. Sadistica stood, “Of course not.” She smiled a wicked smile. Skulduggery threw the fireball right at Sadistica, but at the last minute, she shadow walked to his side but Skulduggery was ready. He pulled his gun out from his jacket and fired. She died instantly.
I was named Caroline De Wan once, before my taken name.
I like it Miss Cain but the dialogue is a bit confusing.
My ACTUAL (Miss Cain is a cover up) taken name no one knows except me
yeah, i suck at grammer and the postions of dialogue and the dialogue
but i think its my best
I DON'T HAVE A NAME! :D
Well I like it.
I've got mine, if anyone's interested...?
Well I like it.
Back!
Sure Nix
yes please Nix!
Ah. I remember you know. Ms DarkFlair. Its been a long time.
It might be changed, but this is what it'll be, give or take a word or two
Yes, nix.
Ms DarkFlair? What are you talking about?
Wow Nix!!! Yours is AMAZING!
Hi Eve
I might change that ending
Well I like it.
nice one Nix!!
now i KNOW im not going to win
too many entries better then mine
Well I g2g Bye!
Ok, i guess you aren't Crys then.
Bye Helena!!
It's got Val killign, I might hane it so Tortura died from something else
Cool entry, Nix!
WHO IS HELENA???
Bye Helena
Straw Eve!
Yep, it's amazing!
A am better than you! Jokes, I'm me. And Australian.
May the fours be with you Helena!
*bangs head on desk*
Why are there better entries then mine??
*continues to bang head on desk*
Nixion, as much as i hate to say it. You have a chance. I don't, cos if:
Gep
Octa(which he has)
and a few others
have entered, then im screwed.
It's great, Nix.
*sits down and starts tearing up leaves*
Bye Helena
im confused. DO you know me or not>
*stares out the wondow, scowling*
Octa has, but he broke the terms by having 9 words too many
*window
Phoenix, I haven't seen you in a while! Hello!
Y'alright Cain?
actually, only 2. because dereks opening is 42 words.
Hello Eve dear.
NO!!
My entry is pretty crap
i did the word limit thing then i read Nix's
im DOOMED!!
mine is now 519
both owrd count and my own counting tell me that it's 50
i really gotta stick to my odd life blog, Death and Ice, and my school for minions fan-fic
NOT COMPS!!
Its. 50.
be optimistic,
but there will be 10 winners not just 1
Mine was 679 words long so I had to cut loads out of it:(
wow
i did exactly 450 words not including the bit Derek wrote
Hello Phoenix deer. I counted 50, so did my computer
yep, exaclty 50
“Let me give you your first lesson in detecting. Never leave a man with his hands behind his back.”
Or.
“A lesson in detecting. Never leave a man with his hands behind his back.”
Or.
“ Your first lesson in detecting. Never leave a man with his hands behind his back.”
the 2nd
If you'll wait a sec, I'll post mine here. *switches to mini laptop*
why did it do 2??
The first one, Phoenix
OR the 1st
im torn
1st or 2nd
“Your first lesson in detecting: never leave a man with his hands behind his back.”
1st
2nd
Yup, the first one
20 comments to go..
She's talking about the options, Flame.
i think Flame is talking about how many comments until next page
Lakyn? Psh. ADAM!
what??
FINALLY! Now THAT took an age and a half. Prepare to be relieved that yours are better than mine:
Valkyrie groaned, and sat up. "I told you it was a trap," she said.
"No, you said it looked like a trap," Skulduggery corrected. "That's completely different."
He helped her up as a door opened behind them and Sadistica Tortura walked through, an unsettling smile on her lips. The door had just appeared out of nowhere, looking out of place in the underground tunnels below Gordon’s house.
“How do you like my magical door?” she asked. “It can open to anywhere in the world, and do you know what that means?”
Skulduggery threw a fireball at her, and Valkyrie sent forward a stream of shadows.. Sadistica’s smile widened as her body shimmered, rendering their attacks useless. “It means,” she continued,” there is no escape from me.” She thrust out her arm and shimmery stuff jetted towards Skulduggery, throwing him off his feet. He hit the cave wall ten metres away with a nasty crack! In less than a second Valkyrie was crumpled up against the wall next to him, pain flaring through her body.
“I’ve changed my mind,” Sadistica said. “I’m tried of playing with you. I’ll just kill you now.” She waded towards them, as if through water.
Skulduggery groaned. Valkyrie would have done the same if she had any air in her lungs.
“The door . . .” she heard Skulduggery whisper.
Valkyrie shifted position. The movement made her cry out in pain. Sadistica laughed.
“The door, Valkyrie.” Skulduggery murmured slightly louder. “Get her through the door. It’s . . . our . . . only hope.”
“Huh?” Valkyrie croaked.
Skulduggery lifted his head slightly. “Evil puppies,” he said forcefully. Valkyrie frowned, wondering if the cave wall had given him brain damage, although that seemed unlikely, seeing as he didn’t have a brain.
Sadistica was less than a metre away now. “Good effort, but I’m afraid it won’t work. The door responds to no other living creature except me.”
The door? Responding? . . . Skulduggery had said the password for the door!
“Your password’s evil puppies?” Valkyrie disbelievingly.
“I don’t like puppies. They annoy me,” Sadistica told her, standing over Valkyrie and holding her hand above her head, palm down. “Hold still, now.”
Suddenly there was a flash of blue light and Skulduggery and the door had disappeared.
“No,” Sadistica gasped. “How -”
The door reappeared in front of Sadistica. It lead to the Faceless Ones’ dimension. “I’m not living,” Skulduggery explained, walking out of it.
Valkyrie scrambled up, ignoring the pain, and shoved Sadistica forward, into the light of the doorway. Her hands seemed to slide through Sadistica’s form, as if she were half-dried glue.
“NO!” shrieked Sadistica as she fell through the doorway. Valkyrie was dragged through with her, her hands still stuck in Sadistica’s waist. She was also going to fall through the doorway and get killed by the Faceless Ones. . .
But Skulduggery had grabbed hold of her, and Valkyrie felt her hands pull out of Sadistica with relief. She was safe.
FIRST OPTION!
Ooooh, I like yours
slightly confusing.
heres mine, completed.
Valkyrie groaned, and sat up. "I told you it was a trap," she said.
"No, you said it looked like it was a trap," Skulduggery corrected. "That's completely different."
He helped her up as a door opened behind them and Sadistica Tortura walked through, an unsettling smile on her lips.
Skulduggery stiffened and cocked his head sideways, fixing his hat. He casually reached for his revolver, subtly slipping his left hand into his jacket. Sadistica saw him and shook her head. “Please, don’t. Let’s not make this harder than it has to be,” She spoke, well pronounced. Sadistica Tortura was wearing the attire of a tight pinstripe dress that came down to her knees, which surprisingly, didn’t make it hard for her to walk. Her black hair and icy blue eyes made her look as if she were scolding someone. “It is nice to see you again, detective.”
Skulduggery sighed, one of his more dramatic ones. “I would say the same but, really it isn’t. Trouble follows at your heels. What do you want?”
Valkyrie subdued a giggle and looked at Skulduggery. “Who is this?”
Skulduggery looked at the walls, which were now covered in what looked like metal bars, in fact, they were metal bars. “It was a cunning trick Sadistica. Not your usual style, simplicity made it hard to be obvious, yet, still cunning. Making the room into a cell that restricts magic. I give you due.” Skulduggery turned to Val, “She’s Sadistica Tortura. She was on Melevolants side in the war. She is a dangerous foe, cunning, smart and a brilliant actress. I spent years chasing her, yet somehow she always got away. And now, she has us trapped.” Skulduggery stood up tall and smiled, hands behind his back.
“Oh.”
Sadistica laughed, “Oh, you make me feel so… What’s the word?”
“Powerful?” Skulduggery smirked.
The woman smiled and continued, “That’s it, powerful. But you obviously do not know why I have trapped you. Do you?”
Skulduggery shifted uncomfortably. “Would it have anything to do with… a dog by any chance?”
Sadistica ignored him and continued her rant, “I know your secrets. I have proof, that what happened on O’Connell Street the other day were entirely both your faults and I want you to do something.” She smiled and repeated, “I know your secret.”
Valkyrie gasped and couldn’t speak. Skulduggery just stared unmoving down to the ground.
“How’d you find out?” Val muttered calmly.
“Who cares?” Skulduggery said. “Sadistica Tortura, I’m afraid you are finally under arrest.”
Sadistica laughed, “You are in no position to make an arrest, remember, I’m in control.”
It was Skulduggery’s turn to laugh. “Let me give you your first lesson in detecting: never leave a man with his hands behind his back, as it will always turn out worse for you.” He revealed his phone and laughed. “Cleavers,” he called. A group of five Cleavers entered the room and grabbed Sadistica and they dragged her out uneasily, as she kept kicking and screaming.
YAY!!! you fixed the mistake!!
COOL, STAR!!! EVIL PUPPIES!!!
YAAAAAAAAAAY!!! GOOD CHARLOTTE!!!!
Everybody! Put up up your hands, say I don't wanna be in love, I don't wanna be in love!
Thanks people!
Your's is really good Flame:)
Oooooh, I love Good Charlotte..... :)
exactly 500 and this time Val doesn't directly kill
Why would i do that.
Im awaiting sparkys return..
Cool, Nix
Oh yay! ADAM!
ded time...
i dedicate this page to music
cus its awesome
and yeah
...Guys, I'm going to leave. Take a break.
Like, for a few days. A few weeks. A few months. Whatever works.
So, now that that has been said, im going to sleep. Bye, see you when I get back.
Bye Zath!!
I shall see you when you return
Mist...
I hope it's only a day
Bye Mist!
Bye Mist!
Phoenix, it's a song.
Gtg:( Fours.
CAN SOMEONE POST ME THE LINKIETHING FOR THE SP COMP
Aw. :('
Bye Star!
BYE STARINO
Bye Star
@ Flame
which one do you normally do?
US, UK or ANZ
bye Star!!
im gonna give you the ANZ one:
http://www.skulduggerypleasant.co.uk/tentimestheawesome/
alright, gotta go
might be back soon
bye bye
UK.
Bye Miss Cain!
Bye Miss Cain
I'll hav to ask to put my adress in there, my mum's tight about these things
Keith and Joel and Seal!
I gotta go. Might be back later
Bye!
Yeah, well, I'm 35
BYE./
IM ACTUALLY 13
And I'm actually 12
Which makes me thirty five in unicorn years
HOW DO YOU POST THE MICROSOFT THINGY IN THE BOX
Click browse
Find the file
They wont let me upload the story...
Sadface.
Bye Phoenix!
Say I don't wanna be in love, I don't wanna be in love...
*is listening to the song now*
Hi Nix! Am I still cherishing?
I just entered the comp!
Yay!
*doesmt perish*
That's it then! It is off your worry list. So forget about it completely and eat a lemming sandwich
now what should I write?
That's why I did it. To stop worrying about it. Nothing I can do now.
Write about lollipops!
Lollipops try to kill me by puncturing my windpipe
Except eat a lemming sandwich
I've got a new idea I'm writing. I think it's quite good
Cool, are you going to tell me?
Probably not
I am shocked, Nix. Shocked.
Well, not that shocked. But the point is,
Tellllllllll meeeeeeee!
I could tell you the smallest bit of what it's about...
Yeeeeeeeeah?
Weeeeeeeeell?
Dreams
Really? That's what you call.....
Ah.
Coooooooool!
Mickey, my friend!
Mickey is not your friend
You are my friend!
You are Mickey!
Mickey, my friend!
If Pluto is a dog, Mickey is a mouse, and Donald id a duck, what is Goofy?
A more intelligent but stupid dog
Msd
Brb
Then Mickey is weird, treating a being, who another one of the species is a friend, like a pet
K Eve
That doesn't sound like you. But of course, I was talking about a Mickey other than Mickey, the mouse.
*throws tomato at Eve*
*makes salad* I am talking about Mickey, my friend!
I hate my phone. This is probably gonna be a one time comment because my phone is now f**ked up.
Hi Lynxia
Lynxia, go easy on your phone. It tries its hardest, you know it does
(almost) Midnight = sleep
Bye!
Bye Mickey, my friend!
Ack🐯
I should sleep too
Lynxia, cherish your phone. You won't know how precious it is until you lose it. Unless you get a new one, then all is solved
SA says Sayonara to Blogland!
South Australia: SAYONARA BLOGLAND!
No, Eve, my phone has just done an update and it is now all screwed up! I HATE YOU HTC FOR SCREWING UP MY PHONE!!!!!! NEXT TIME, I'M IGNORING THE UPDATE ICON!!
(Can't stay, *throws phone at wall* I need to find how to undo updates because it is fucked)
Very true, Eve. I didn't know how precious my phone was until I lost it.
Losing it taught me that it's level of preciousness was a lot lower than I thought and that I could manage without it:P
Oh, is nobody here? Never mind.
Star, are you still there?
I'm going then, but I'll bbs.
I'm back, but it seems like no one's on...
I have 45 minutes, so I'll be here till then.
*sigh*
If no one's here, I'm going to go then. Got homework to finish.
Bye!
Im hone!!! Haa last day of school cuz im epic
Ok im not lonely......
Not here yet, will be in maybe an hour.
Okay, never mind about an hour. I'm here now. But is anyone else?
Mmmk hopefully Derek does post eventually....lol. Not like he got attacked by the door. I hope. I usually try fighting he door at 3am. The door wins
Hey Blogland!! I'm here on my phone (I managed to get it working slightly buy not for long) while my laptop boots up.
Hi guys!
Hey, Zaf, I have two more days of school. Yay! :D
That's good it's working a little, Lynxia. :)
Yeah, it had an update and noe I can't comment on other posts so after we fill up this post, I won't be here as much. But on the bright side, I won't have to put up with disappearing comments.
I heard about you're update. That stinks that you can't comment on other posts, but good to know your comments will stop disappearing. :)
I out of school :) somepne died in my family and idk them but they gave me an extra day
Yeah, always look on the bright side. So, how're you?
Wbd, typing up chap. 2 of Crescent. Then I'll force myself back onto Patchwork or Rogue. But I wanna do Guardian/By Force (haven't chosen a name yet) too! Aah! Too many story ideas!
K, am on laptop now.
I'm fine. I know what you mean about too many ideas. That happens to me a lot and that's one reason why I didn't finish any of my previous stories. I want to finish the one I'm working on now though. Btw, did you read the next part yet? Part two of Chapter two?
I'm planning on bringing the name up on the next chapter. Then I can finally call it something.
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