Thursday, December 15, 2011

ANOTHER Competition??


London had Justin Bieber turning on its city's lights. Dublin had Michael Buble. And who did my neighbouring village Donabate have to turn on THEIR Christmas lights last Saturday evening? Why, they just had international superstar author Derek Landy drop by to ROCK. THEIR. WORLD. 

And verily, their world was indeed rocked.

I was surrounded at all times by a pack of chattering girls, led by my very good friend Molly, whom I had met at the Twilight premiere a few weeks ago. 'Tis a small world indeed. A small, odd world. Filled with small, odd girls, who wouldn't stop talking.

But that's not why I'm here to talk to you today. Specifically, you people with the funny accents. Even more specifically, you people with the funny accents from Australia and New Zealand. I am here to tell YOU people that, good Lordy, we are running ANOTHER create-a-character competition just for you- because I am a kind and gracious Golden God.

I wasn't planning on running another competition quite so soon, but after talking to my publishers I decided to squeeze one last contest into the final few weeks of 2011, and it's all to do with The End Of The World, which is being published in Ireland and the UK in March as part of World Book Day. Now, I'm sure all of you know just how much I love synchronicity, how much I love releasing books at the same time across the world, so we have arranged for TEOTW to be released in Australia and New Zealand at the same time, and it was decided that it should include a brand new and exclusive short story featuring two characters that you guys will have to come up with.

Readers elsewhere need not worry, of course, as this bonus story will be collected along with all the other short stories 'n' stuff sometime soon (or soonish...). And readers in Ireland and the UK will also get a few pages of bonus material in the back of TEOTW, just for being you...

But I digress.

The competition! The deadline is tight, my Australiminions, my New Zeali...minions.... (I'm not sure that works... ahem...). The deadline is 11.59 PM on New Year's Eve in whatever Time Zone you happen to be in, and not a second after!

Because we have this tight schedule, I'm going to give you a few pointers which might improve your chances of winning- pointers which look a lot like ten rules you MUST OBEY.

RULES

1. Readers from Australia- I need a female character from you lot. Readers from New Zealand- I need a male character from you. 

2. There will be ONE winner from each country. 

3. Be practical when giving them their powers. I couldn't use some FANTASTIC characters from the other competitions because their powers would either have needed some heavy-duty explanation, or the characters were just TOO DAMN POWERFUL.

Restrict yourselves to a discipline of magic we've already seen in the books. Don't make your character someone who can do both Elemental and Adept magic. Don't make your character half-unicorn. Don't make your character Skulduggery's long lost brother. Who is also half-unicorn. Who can do both Elemental and Adept magic.

Be practical!

4. Post your entries HERE, in the Comments Section, which is now off-limits to everyone else! (The Blog entry accompanying this one will be for the usual chatter.)

5. You can post as many times as you want.

6. Before your entry, write this: "I hereby give my Golden God, Derek Landy, full rights to take this character and adapt it into his brain-explodingly brilliant work."

7. Understand that I might have to tweak your character in order to get the best fit for the story.

8. I can't think of an eighth rule. 

9. Oh, oh! I thought of one!

10. Bring me... a shrubbery. 


4,849 comments:

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Octa said...

1875

Matthew Webb becomes the first person to swim the English Channel.

Octa said...

1876

Colorado admitted as the 38th U.S state.

First successful telephone call.

Octa said...

1877

Deimos and Phobos- the two moons of Mars discovered.

Octa said...

1878

Death of the last confirmed Cape Lion

Octa said...

1879

Albert Einstein born.

Tay Bridge Dusaster

Pirates of Penzance first performed.

Octa said...

1880

Cocaine isolated

Octa said...

1881

Gunfight at the O.K Corral

Octa said...

1882

A.A Milne and Franklin Roosevelt born.

Octa said...

1883

Last Quagga dies.
Oxygen liquified for the first time.

Octa said...

1884

Mark Twain publishes The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn

Octa said...

1885

Louis Pasteur successfully tests his vaccine against rabies.

Octa said...

1886

Burma is presented to Queen Victoria as a birthday gift

*snorts*

Happy Birthday! We bought you this nice country of Burma. I hope you like it as its non refundable.

Coca cola invented
President Cleveland dedicates the Statue of Liberty

Octa said...

1887

Eiffel Tower built.

Octa said...

1888

Vincent Van Gogh cuts off part of his left ear.

Octa said...

1889

North Dakota, South Dakota, Montana and Washington are admitted as the 39th, 40th, 41st and 42nd states of the U.S respectively.

Octa said...

1890

Idaho and Wyoming are admitted as the 43rd and 44th U.S states.

Octa said...

1891

Nikolai Tesla invents the Tesla coil.

Octa said...

1892

Viruses are discovered.

Octa said...

1893

U.S Congress legally declare the tomato to be a vegetable.

Octa said...

1894

Dreyfus Affair

Octa said...

1895

X-Rays discovered

Octa said...

1896

Utah admitted as the 45th U.S state

Octa said...

1897

J.J Thompson discovers the electron.

Octa said...

1898

Radium discovered.

Octa said...

1899

Riro, the last king of Easter Island dies.

Octa said...

1900

First hamburger created.

Octa said...

1901

First Nobel Prize awarded.

Octa said...

1902

First Aswan Dam completed.

Octa said...

1903

First heavier than air flight

First box of Crayola crayons made

Octa said...

1904

Firstunderground line of the NYC Subway opens.

Octa said...

1905

Wolves become extinct in Japan

Octa said...

1906

Richard Oldham argues that the Earth has a molten interior

Octa said...

1907

Korea becomes a protectorate of Japan

Octa said...

1908

First fully animated film

Octa said...

1909

City of Tel Aviv founded.

Octa said...

1910

Vatican introduces a compulsory law against modernism.

Octa said...

1911

Machu Picchu rediscovered by Hiram Bingham.

Octa said...

1912

Sinking of the Titanic

Octa said...

*sulks*

Stupid Wikipedia.

It doesn't have the last 5 states in the year pages.

1907- Oklahoma admitted as 46th U.S state

1912- New Mexico and later Arizona admitted as 47th and 48th U.S states

1959- Alaska and Hawaii admitted as 49th and 50th U.S states.

Octa said...

Bye everyone!

The Awesomely Awesome Ninja Llama who is just so Awesomely Awesome and she was so Awesomely Awesome that everyone DIED (aka FreakFan) said...

Hi

Octa said...

Hello! People of the Blogland!

Octa said...

*waits for another conciousness to talk to*

Octa said...

*resorts to talking to penguins*

Octa said...

How nice to see you Sir Penguin of The Black Flipper!

Octa said...

Prithee speaketh to me so that mine boredom canst be allieveatedeth.

Octa said...

Verily! Verily forsooth!

I must abandon ye penguin and go read Two Girls One Snail.

Tis a most excellent fanfic.

READ IT! READ IT! READ IT!

Robin Snowscar said...

We only make mistakes up in our heads

Robin Snowscar said...

Imagination is more important than knowledge

Robin Snowscar said...

Doors are for people with no imagination

Robin Snowscar said...

To die would be a great adventure

Robin Snowscar said...

We believe in selfless acts of bravery that drives one person to stand up for another

Robin Snowscar said...

We believe in selfless acts of bravery that drives one person to stand up for another

Robin Snowscar said...

(I'm sorry I haven't been on much Octa! I'm dying under exams -.-)

These are quotes from my head so maybe slightly misquoted

Robin Snowscar said...

If you judge a fish on its ability to climb a tree then it will live its whole life believing it was stupid

Robin Snowscar said...

We're all dealing with the same hell; just different levels
Different demons; but the same devils

Robin Snowscar said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Robin Snowscar said...

Fire is catching and if we burn, you burn with us

Robin Snowscar said...

Darkness does not always equate to evil, just as the light does not always bring good

Robin Snowscar said...

In a room sit three men, a king, a priest, and a rich man. Between them stands a sellsword of common birth and no great mind and no. Each of the great ones bids him slay the other two. So tell me, who lives and who dies?

Power resides where men believe it resides.

Robin Snowscar said...

And a very small man can cast a very large shadow

Robin Snowscar said...

time to go!
50 points to whoever can tell me the names of the authors who wrote those!

Octa said...

It's cool Robin. I have a whole load of exams coming up. Doubt I'll be on much in may.

Umm....

Doors are for people with no imagination-Derek Landy

Fire is catching and if we burn you burn with us. Suzanne Collins.

Octa said...

Everybody knows that everybody dies and nobody knows it like the Doctor. But I do think that all the skies of all the worlds might just turn dark if he ever for one moment, accepts it.

Octa said...

Because I've seen him. And he's like fire and ice and rage. He's like the night and the storm and the heart of the sun. He's ancient and forever. He burns at the center of time and he can see the turn of the Universe... And he's wonderful"

Octa said...

"Good men don't need rules. Today is not the day to find out why I have so many."

Octa said...

Oh, big, big mistake. Really huge. Didn't anyone ever tell you? There's one thing you never put in a trap. If you're smart, if you value your continued existence, if you have any plans about seeing tomorrow, there is one thing you never, ever put in a trap. Me.

Octa said...

The writing - the graffiti - Old High Gallifreyan... the lost language of The Timelords. There were days, there were many days, these words could burn stars, and raise up empires, and topple gods.

Octa said...

"You are a perfect example of the inverse ratio between the size of the mouth and the size of the brain."

Octa said...

There is no indignity in being afraid to die, but there is a terrible shame in being afraid to live.

Octa said...

I don't believe that man was made to be controlled by machines. Machines can make laws, but they can not preserve justice. Only human beings can do that.

Octa said...

We're always in trouble! Isn't this extraordinary - it follows us everywhere!

Octa said...

Our lives are important — at least to us — and as we see, so we learn... Our destiny is in the stars, so let's go and search for it.

Octa said...

Professor Dortmun: Two more pairs of hands! Good. David Campbell: [Pointing to Barbara.] She says she can cook! Professor Dortmun: Can you? Barbara nods. David Campbell: [Addressing Susan] And what do YOU do? Susan: I eat.

Octa said...

Dalek: I warn you! Resistance is useless!
The Doctor: Resistance is useless? Surely you don't expect ALL the people to welcome you with open arms?

Octa said...

Ian: Doctor, you're a genius!
The Doctor: Yes, there are very few of us left. Now let's get out of here, and be crafty!

Octa said...

That is the dematerializing control. And that, over yonder, is the horizontal hold. Up there is the scanner, those are the doors, that is a chair with a panda on it. Sheer poetry, dear boy! Now please stop bothering me.

Octa said...

The Doctor: What do you think of that, now, eh? A Viking helmet. Steven Taylor: Maybe.
The Doctor: What do you mean, "maybe"? What do you think it is, a space helmet for a cow?

Octa said...

The Doctor [bristling when a policeman asks if he is a British citizen]: Your ideas are too narrow, too crippled. I am a citizen of the universe, and a gentleman to boot!

Octa said...

Jano: Do you not realize that all progress is based on exploitation? The Doctor: That, sir, is protracted murder!

Octa said...

Polly: Don't you care?! Cyberman: Care? No. Why should I care? Polly: Because they're people and they are going to die! Cyberman: I do not understand you; there are people dying all over your world, and you do not care about them.

Octa said...

Not allowed? Not allowed! Me, I'm allowed everywhere.

Octa said...

The Doctor: Zaroff, I think you ought to know the sea has broken through and is about to overwhelm us here.
Zaroff: Don't listen to him. The man lies.
The Doctor: Then perhaps the distant roaring that we can hear is just the goddess Amdo with indigestion.

Octa said...

The Doctor: I am not a student of human nature. I am a professor of a far wider academy of which human nature is merely a part.

The Awesomely Awesome Ninja Llama who is just so Awesomely Awesome and she was so Awesomely Awesome that everyone DIED (aka FreakFan) said...

Heyy?

Robin Snowscar said...

SHAKUGAN NO SHANA

The time has come, I have a confession to make:

I am...



Obsessed with Japanese animes

Robin Snowscar said...

And 5 points to Octaboona!

Robin Snowscar said...

Hmm I may have to take this first from you Octa

Robin Snowscar said...

It's nearly time for insurgent I'm so excited

Robin Snowscar said...

My birthday is in 9 days YAY

Robin Snowscar said...

15 is a good age to be I reckon

Robin Snowscar said...

I prefer odd numbers, how bout you Octa?

Robin Snowscar said...

SHAKUGAN NO SHANA

Watch them

*russian accent*
But once you start you be able to stop.

Robin Snowscar said...

How long do you reckon a book is?

I'm at 11,500 words and I'm aiming for 15,000 so it should end up somewhere around 45,000 words reckon that's enough?

Robin Snowscar said...

*nods* I think it is

Robin Snowscar said...

I GOT TWO A'S AND AN A* IN SCIENCE

Robin Snowscar said...

*victory dance*

Robin Snowscar said...

BUT

I'm resitting the As apparently of my own freewill

Robin Snowscar said...

Is it a bad thing to make a character cry? Like the strong one?

No. Let's not.

Robin Snowscar said...

This is difficult

Robin Snowscar said...

I'm finding it difficult to host a conversation with my self

Robin Snowscar said...

Ah

*brushes of the normal*

Robin Snowscar said...

It almost got me

Robin Snowscar said...

*poses* but I will never surrender

Robin Snowscar said...

My hair colour, stolen *growls*

Robin Snowscar said...

D

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Robin Snowscar said...

!

Robin Snowscar said...

1st

Robin Snowscar said...

Oh my gosh what a surprise

Robin Snowscar said...

DEDICATION:

Octaboona

For being the only other person who filled up this blog a lot! And for having a mind of his own.

Robin Snowscar said...

Goodbye kids!

Octa said...

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! MY STREAK!

AND ALSO MY STEAK!

BOTH LOST!

Octa said...

Ah well.

I should come here more often is all.

Octa said...

That and stop hiding my steaks in my dog.

Octa said...

If I had a dog that is.

Octa said...

Which I don't.

Octa said...

*pokes Robin*

Octa said...

Thanks for the dedication though :)

Octa said...

*hums*

I feel like a song coming on.

YAAAAAAAAAY!

Octa said...

This is good news. Excellent news.

As an aspiring song writer it is important not to just come up with lyrics but also with a tune.

Alas I sadly lack that ability.

BUT I'VE JUST COME UP WITH MY VERY OWN TUNE AND IM HAPPY!

Octa said...

Oooooh a chorus!

I HAVE A CHORUS!

Octa said...

This hot chocolate is like drinknig a brew made of the fiery pits of hell themselves.

SOOOOO HOT!

Octa said...

Hmm.... I must go do research for my song.

Octa said...

Once a Phyllis
Always a Phyllis
A Phyllis she will be

Once a Phyllis
Always a Phyllis
A Phyllis she will be

Octa said...

YAY LOOK AT MY CHORUS :D

Octa said...

Hmm.... now for the verses

Well I shall do those later.

I have the first line anyway.

Octa said...

EXCITEMENT!

Octa said...

Hmm.... I shall now proceed to converse with my self.

In order to distinguish my self from myself I shall call myself Octa 1 and myself Octa 2.

Octa said...

Or perhaps Octa A and Octa B

Octa said...

Octa Alpha and Beta?

Aleph and Bet?

Octa said...

Octa I and II?

Octa said...

Maybe I should go with Octa the First and Octa the Second

Octa said...

Octa the First: Who cares? Just pick one already.

Octa II: No this needs deliberation and careful thought.

Octa said...

Octa the First: ...

Octa II: ...?

Octa said...

WHY DON'T ALL THE MINI OCTA'S MERGE INTO A SUPER OCTA?

Octa said...

I AM OCTABOONA AMBROSIUS-PURPLE POET AND PARAGON OF THE HORDE OF IRIDESCENT INDIGO, GLINT OF THE MOON AND EMBER OF THE GLORIOUS SUN. MY NAMES ARE AS VARIED AS THE STARS IN THE HEAVENS AND THE DUST OF THE EARTH. A THOUSAND MYRIAD OF DISCIPLES WHISPER MY NAME IN TEMPLES AND SHRINES AND THE SACRED HOLY OF HOLIES. I AM KNOWN THROUGHOUT THE SCATTERED ISLES AND THE PEAKS OF THE SHINING SORROW. FROM SHORE TO SHORE I AM WORSHIPED AND LOVED AND FEARED.

I AM YOUR MASTER AND YOU WILL BELONG TO ME!

*coughs* Yeah that's why I don't let them all come together. They get all arrogant and suffer delusions of grandeur.

Poor things.

Octa said...

WE NEVER COME UP WITH GOOD IDEAS ON THE OTTER!

Octa said...

Bizzare fruits bizaaare fruits

Octa said...

Aprium Boquilaaaa Chokecherryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

Octa said...

So hungry.

*looks dreamily at the lunch*

Musn't eat raw chicken.

*watches it cook hungrily*

Octa said...

*babbles on about babbling*

Octa said...

Let's talk about etymology.

Etymology is awesome.

The awesomest ology of them all.

Octa said...

Tragedies = Songs of the Goat from the Greek Tragos meaning goat.

Ancient Athenian actors used to wear goatskin when they performed serious plays which is why the plays became known as tragedies.

Octa said...

Also science is shit etymologically speaking.

Shit comes from the Old Englidh word scitan which came from the Proto-Germanic skit which came from the Proto-Indo- European word shkei which means to separate (i.e. you separate yourself from your faeces).

But when shkei arrived in Italy if you could tell two things apart (separate them) then you knew them so the Latin word for know became scire. From that you get the Latin word scientia which means knowledge and from that we get science.

Therefore science = shit.

Octa said...

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K

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S

Octa said...

?

Octa said...

It sure is confusing though.

Octa said...

*hums*

Octa said...

So much to fill.

Octa said...

It is indeed a daunting task.

Octa said...

And a lonely one at that.

Octa said...

But I shall prevail.

Octa said...

With my good friend Robin.

Octa said...

*plods steadily along*

Octa said...

Need to say stuff.

Octa said...

Mmmmm.... stuff....

Octa said...

I am becoming a zombie.

Octa said...

BRAAAIIIIINS!

Octa said...

THE MIDDLE LAMELLAAAAAA!

Octa said...

AAAAAPEX!

Octa said...

THE CASPARIAN PATHWAAAAY!

Octa said...

ENDOPLASMIC RETICULUMMMMM!

Octa said...

SPONGY MESOPHYLLLLLL!

Octa said...

BIOLOGY HAS SOME AWESOME NAMES FOR STUFFFF!

Octa said...

I WILL NOM UPON YOUR MIDDLE LAMELLAAAA NOM NOM NOM *crunches*

Octa said...

This is fun. I should be a zombie more often.

I could befriend Thrasher and have tea.

Octa said...

PREPARE THE OSTEOBLASTS!

DUN DUN DUN!

Octa said...

NOOOO!

NOT THE OSTEOBLASTS!

RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!

Octa said...

DUN DUN DUN HONEY BADGER!

Octa said...

Ooooooh! *stares dreamily*

A Tardigrade.

Also known as a moss piglet.

Hehehe moss piglet.

Octa said...

GIVE ME AN M!

M!

GIVE ME AN OSS!

OSS!

GIVE ME A PIGLET!

PIGLET!

WHAT DO YOU GET?

MOSS PIGLET!

Octa said...

Spider moss piglet
Spider moss piglet
Does whatever a spider moss piglet does
Can he swing from a web
No he can't he's a moss piglet
Look out! Here comes the spider moss piglet.

Octa said...

Ten green moss piglets
Hanging on a wall
Ten green moss piglets
Hanging on a wall
And if one green moss piglet should accidently fall
There'll be nine green moss piglets
Hanging on a wall

Octa said...

MOSS PIGLETS FOR THE WIN!

Octa said...

FRENCH THE LLAMA THAT MOSS PIGLET IS INVINCIBLE!

Octa said...

I HAVE RUN OUT OF ENTHUSIASM FOR MOSS PIGLETS!

Octa said...

Let's talk about giraffes!

Octa said...

Or not!

My knowledge about giraffes is on a rather inappropriate topic.

*coughs*

Octa said...

*puts on a fez*

Octa said...

*prepares to exit*

Octa said...

Byeeeeeeeeeeee!

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