A lot of people are asking where they can buy Skulduggery placemats, and the answer is NOWHERE! My sisters actually breached copyright to get them made, but because they had the permission of my publishers, they're not being sued...
I'd love to sue my sisters. That would be FUNNY.
Wouldn't make me too popular around Christmas time, though...
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About Derek
- Derek Landy
- Derek Landy writes the Skulduggery Pleasant series because getting a proper job is so overrated.
4,282 comments:
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stop distracting me
ahhhhh the lock wont open!!!!!! *checks pockets for key* no the keys in dragona lake
Brb, need to wash up...
*Runs over to Dragona and Flo, pulls Flo back onto the top of the building and kicks the, remnant? out of her.*
did Flo just shoot me?
i think she did
erm bit late...
you wouldnt hurt me really would you??
*Dragona helps florence up*
*Florence runs into trees*
NEVER DRAGONA THE OLD FLORENCE IS GONE ITS ME NOW!!!
flo please don't shoot me ignore the green hag that hired the ninga kiwi on me please don't shoot pleeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaase
NEW PAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IM SO EPIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*mumbles something about the green hag paying*
there is no rement....
*laughs*
you can stay on my raft Kallista
oh no she going to shoot me *desperatly looks for key to goose cage*
Oh my god, do I have to do everything?
*Put's a bullet/magic proof shield around everyone, runs after Flo and makes a bubble of none air around her head. The remnant can't fight the survival instinct and it comes out of Flo*
*drops unconsious mouthing there is no rement*
OH!
*Stops suffocating Flo and drops her into Dragonas awesome cell*
few she can't shoot me whilst unconcious *hancuffs flo to a tree and removes all weapons* ha I'll never release you ...
unless I freakisly become an assasin like you but that could never happen *laughs nervously*
*Runs to get Kenspeckle to help Flo, remembers that he died and runs in circles waving her arms around*
NOOOO!! HOW DO WE SAVE FLO!
*wakes up in dragonas cell....*
shit...now what do i do..
*walks in circles and assassin poison suddenly kicks in*
Must kill must kill....
*kicks Florence's cell door in*
Heya flo you feeling ok :]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A6r7NJjabJk
Listen to this, AWESOME SONG!
*gets syringe and takes all the poison out*
*falls to knees*
cant kill cant kill
*colapses and then comes up again eyes shining red*
Dragona Pine is next on my list....
*takes out sword and attacks*
Dragona!!! *runs screaming to goose cage them remembers she lost key* *runs in circles hoping flo can't get a clear shot when I'm like this*
*the posion is mixed with my blood impossible to get rid of by anyone but one person*
Florence... please be back to normal... I don't like you when you're like this...
And you can't kill me!
Hey, am I unpopular? Cause none of you ever talk to me! I mean type. Can we do spoilers yet? I'm dying to talk to you guys about it coz' all my friends are still reading it so I have no one to talk to about it which makes me sad:(
ny way I'm on my new iPad. It's totally awesome! You should all get one. But my dad did get it free so you guys might have some trouble coz' they're super expensive. And sorry I can't get you any as well, it was a one of. And any way we've run out of our free stuff from my dads work, coz' we got a free flat screen T.V. Too!
why is that in stars???
*Put's up defensive shield around Dragona, nothing can get through the shield*
must help flo and dragona *grabs flo from behind and twists her arm forcing her to drop sword*
*flips over Florence and runs the opposite way*
Help me... one of my friends is trying to kill me... and I THOUGHT she was my friend... obviously not now...
*cries*
*points sword at Dragona, phone rings..*
what do you mean new victim...?
*chokes nervosly on her syliva* ekkk I don't want to be killed
*runs picking up sword and killing nicolette on the way*
Gotta go now, Athletics. Flo better be back to normal when I get back, or....or.........or I'll get the ninja kiwi to eat all the MC's in the world.
*takes the opportinity to knock Florence unconcious*
Sorry... but it had to be done...
*is in ireland looking for someone with the initials D L*
dam im late again...
*sword slices threw her chest tries to breath but can't* *drops to floor dead*
*uses magic yorkshire pudding to make the poison go out of her*
Sorry about that, you said one PERSON... my yorkshire pudding isn't a person...
*obliterates the poison*
MEDIC!
*points to Nicolette*
We need a medic down here, now!
NOOOOO! I LIVE IN IRELAND!! Wait, I didn't mean that!!! *Laughs nervously and runs around hoping to look inconspicuous and failing*
*Florence is back to normal*
*the poison acts like a drug*
need to ki.... *drops*
BYE!! I really have to go now.
NEED ANOTHER MEDIC!
*carries Florence to hospital*
*uses magic yorkshire pudding to make Florence normal and concious*
*starts coughing up blood*
pie dont work...
*uses magic yorkshire pudding to stop the bleeding and heal all wounds*
*Blood pours all over ground and starts to choke on her blood*
*dies while saying brb dinner*
*dies*
*reaches the hospital*
Damn it...
*gets the power of the world and channels it through the yorkshire pudding making it flow into Florence making her back to normal*
New post on my nblog!
*cries*
*cries out and accidentally makes the whole universe release their power and flows into Florence, making her alive again*
Oops...
*everything is pretty much the same as before but Florence is alive*
*sends letter to all blogger freinds*
Heya guys being dead suck alot
I think it would bring you some comfort to know I made it to Hevan ... but I don't think t's perminant I think there waiting for an opening in one of the loony bins down in hell ...
Sinserly Nicolette
*uses magic yorkshire pudding to make things excatly as they was before except for Florence is alive*
Wow... my yorkshire pudding has gained power...
*teleports to heaven*
Nicolette!
Come here!
*grabs Nicolette and uses magic yorkshire pudding to make her alive and teleports her back to earth*
*dragona goes to hevean and reaches my apartment*
Random angel: sorry but shes been transfered to the loony bin in hell after asking god if he was hiding a grey squirell in his beard
Me: can you turn the air conditioning on?
Devil: no
Me: why not it's boiling in here
Devil: it's just the way I like it
Me: why would anyone enjoy being roasted alive like a nut?
Devil: lets face it your all nuts down here
Me: so true :]
*teleports to hell*
NICOLETTE!
*stabs the devil*
Yes... you made my friend some down here... I make you suffer the pain!
*grabs Nicolette and teleports to earth*
WOW thank Dragona! It was ok down her but i like it up here better :] *goes to kiss ground and goes right threw it* bummer
MEIN HERZ BRENNT!!
*pulls Nicolette out of the ground*
Gaia is being annoying again. ZEUS!!! RID HER OF THIS EARTH!!!
Oh, wait don't, if she goes we wouldn't have any earth at all!
*floats around in the air* its fun being a ghost
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DSVeNLltoZs&feature=related
lol its sooo funny
Lol.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=55ZyjOez5k0&feature=related
*makes Nicolette alive with newly increased power, magic yorkshire pudding*
I think I've made them both alive again... that's why I'm happy...
*falls to ground alive* wel being a ghost was fun whilst it lasted thanks Dragona
Your welcome Nicolette... I hope Florence is alive again... because I accidentally used all the universes power... oops... read a couple of comments above...
*turns of Titanic theme*
And this isn't helping with my sadness...
*turns of Ipod*
I'm not in the mood for it now...
I'm already sad... it just doesn't help...
"Neeeaarrr, faar, where ever you are,
I believe that your heart will, go on..."
*turns on Ipod*
*play all songs*
"You are not alone,
Because I am here with you..."
Why have I even got this song?
*sobs*
*comes in laughing so hard she can harldy breath* (gasps) find the people who made this video for me
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6H2RCZiY6g0&feature=related
*colapses via lack of oxegen*
*plays next song*
sends telephatic message to everyone...
you know being here is fun..it is neither heaven or hell...its a weird space in between....shame, i was looking forward to meeting florence nightingale....
"... it's a sad, sad situ-ation"
*sobs*
*plays next song*
i wish i had a banana...
*banana appears*
i said this place is awsome i can wish for anything and it just appreas!
*teleports to empty space, grabs Florence and brings her back to earth*
*gets up and breaths* in *breaty in deeply* out *releases and continues breathing*
appears....even in this limbo place i do typos..
nice being on earth again
Why do I have all these sad songs on my Ipod?
I didn't even know I HAD them...
KALLISTA WERE IF THE FANFICTION?????
*kallista falls of hamock*
*hugs Florence*
Yey, your back!
*paints nails purple and black*
Dragona why are you crying now...
NOOOO, not the titanic theme again!
"Near, far, where ever you are,
I believe that your heart will, go on"
*cries*
*hugs back*
*fast forwards loads of songs*
Do I have any good son-
Du, du, dudududu, du du, dudududu du du du du dudududu Bing Bing.
*starts crying because of My heart will go on song*
Never seen Titanic before ..
What?
So that's why my Ipod is full... I have the titanic theme 1232 times...
No... I DON'T WANT IT!
"Near, far, where ever you are,
I believe that your heart will, go ooonnn"
NOOOOOOO!!!!
*hugs Florence while crying*
listens to sarthacus' song....all better...
turn the volume right up...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d1T0ZTXyoCo
Titanic is a very sad film... I've watched it 13 times...
seen it 22 times..very very sad...
*turns volume up*
*copy/pastes*
Brb... listening to the song...
I dare you to watch my sister keeper without crying .. impossible
WOAH!
That was a shock... I fell off my chair...
scared the jeebes outa me when they started to shout MY HEART BURNS in german...i fell of the chair shouting jesus christ..
lol I know right!!
*turns volume down*
You wanted me to fall off my chair...
Listen to what she thinks is my heart burns in german* vibration make the bed vibrate
AHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Now back to my Ipod...
"Near, far, where ever you are,
I believe that your heart will, go on"
Why do I have it cloned loads of times?
sorry im laughing so much that i cant typw properly....i can imagine your face...
*sighs* Kallista will your fan fic be up soon *look at Kallista with pleading puppy dog eyes*
KALLISTA TYPE, TYPE, TYPE!!!!!!!
this will calm you all down
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jz_htyaQQkQ
Don't laugh at me... I've got watery eyes because of this snog...
lol seen it the weird gypsy pops up suddenly...very funny
Grr typos...
*starts laughing again*
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LXA6G16_IBY
LOL!!!!
hialrious when ppl get typos wrong and they say a completely different word :D
Sarthacus... your song made me fall off my chair!
Now I'm listening to the Titanic snog and it's not a very good snot if you aren't happy...
I canat ser!
My eyes are watery!
you ppl kill me
*wipes away tears*
Right... turning off Ipod...
*turns it off*
All better now...
What?
When did we kill you?
Grr... just read my comments... damn typos...
you are all too funny
I'm not funny...
But tell us when we killed you... I saved you!
Meh/
LOL SARTHACUS I'M WATCHING THAT VIDEO LOL
I feel a cross between sad and happy... Sappy... yes, I feel sappy...
brb
Ok...
Hmm... I've got to go to the doctors in the morning for the results of my liver scan...
zeeky- *nuclear explosion*
I think I'm a loner...
Hi Nicolette...
*goes into random dream world*
Oh... this is cool...
Hmm... I'm happy in my own little world...
*views dreams that I've had*
Oh...
*Nicolette comes in*
NOOO!
My dreams!
*teleports her out*
My dreams... no one elses... they're not THAT interesting... if you aren't interested in white lines...
ahaaaa love the end of that movie
Kallista... you can still come on here, but we just want you to hurry up with your fanfic... so please comment but just do your fanfic as well...
*sneakly walks into dragonas dream without him noticing*
Awsome
*climb onto white line and flows with it*
*pops into space between realities* well I guess this is what happens to you when you get kicked out of dreams ....
isn't there meant to be nothing in here *head explodes*
Hmm... my dreams are weird...
These are MY dreams... mine alone...
*teleports Florence back to earth and continues viewing dreams*
*wakes up in a glass box slowly filling with water screen on side of box turns on*
I want to play a game ...
OH GOD!
"wazzup"
shut up voice
"so who was right about being an assassin?"
me, i got poisoned you son of a...
"shhh someones hacking your computer"
i know they were doing it for the past hour
"arent you ment to switch it of"
am i really that dumb?
"who are you asking?"
i rather being in that limbo place at least you weren't there
"Thanx"
just shut up
"Sorry"
you should be..
*silence*
Am I a loner?
Nope... and why did you want to view my dreams Florence, they're nothing interesting,..
"can i talk now?"
no
"now?"
no
"now?"
no
"what about now?"
SHUT UP!
"sorry"
*rocks back in forth in glass box thats slowly filling with water as jigsaz talks*
I dont want to be in saw I don't want to die
... just about white lines and things...
im bored and the conscience me is really dumb..
*smashes Nicolette's box and all the water pours out*
things?
I have quite a few dreams when I'm escaping from something in a car... but I never see the something...
listens to jigsaw
You are trapped in a box slowly filling with water..
well done genious
One of your accaponies has the key weather they choose to save you is there choice ..
oh no!! *kicks and smacks glass*
... the something doesn't appear in my dream, it just IS...
*Dragona kicks glass* .. I think its maxie glass..
DRAGONA do you have the key!!
But their really random... because it is ME...
Yes... I do!
*unlocks Nicolette's box*
open the door!!!!!!!
*opens the door*
*runs out of box* I Hate you Jigsaw!
thank you Dragona .
You're welcome Nicolette...
*goes in dream world again*
i like saw...its funny
I've never seen Saw... I think it's a bit gross...
Saw is gory to watch but finny when people die
I have only seen parts of saw 5 and 6
*curses the white lines as they appear*
*another dream comes up*
Yey... no white lines in this one!
*watches it and feels relieved about no white lines*
i just find it really funny but i dont get whats it all about..
.. a random serial killer who has mental problems...
*does a random dance*
NOOOO WHITE LINES, WHOOP!
*realises that I can't dance*
Nothing happened here...
I don't know what its about either ..... I'm gonna get my dad to buy all of the saw dvds
i like the
Do you want to play a game??
Kallista... have you finished your fanfic?
I'm not bothered about Saw... have no interest... so I'm in my own little dream world... which Florence tried to hack but failed...
yeah I like the do you want a play a game to .... If you go to thorpe park go to the saw maze and ride its BRILLIANT!
my friend was there she got me a photo of one of the creepy guys there and he signed it...i dont know why so dont ask...
*mumbles*
Velocity at Flamingo Land is epic...
Whoop, new page!
Hey people of the universe
why do they call it grape fruit when it looks like an orange?
Velocity at Flamingo Land?
It's an undercover orange, do not be fooled.
well he is not the only one...on the back it says
HEY ITS THE DUDES FROM THORPE PARK!!!!
and then like 6 pople signed it....
Kallista... include the certain part!
Velocity at Flamingo Land is epic, you start off on these motorbikes and you get fastened in and you can't move... and you think : "why are they fastening me up?" and then you go around a corner really slowly and then you wait for several seconds and then VOOM! You are off littereally like a bullet..
Kallista pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaase post it tonight
... and then you go around a corner at such fast speed that it actually HURTS... and then you go around some more corners before stopping...
Yeh Kallista, post it within an hour please...
you have to post it tonight im might not be alowed tommorow or the day after that...
BTW... when and if this blog gets full, come to Derek Landy Overflow Blog, you'll find it on my profile... TELL EVERYONE!
and i want first comment..
You'll not be on tomorrow Florence?
Who am I going to talk to at 7:30 in the morning?
i dont know, i might be on i might not..
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