Hello.
Ah, my poor neglected blog. How I have ignored you. Once you were the apple of my eye (okay, not really — the name of this blog is what it is, after all), but then along came Twitter and suddenly you seemed somewhat clunky and... unwieldy...
But see? I have returned. I've been away a lot, I know. Work. I had that book to publish (which went really well, by the way) and then all those tours, including a trip to New Zealand and Australia to meet all those readers with funny accents.
My life has been somewhat chaotic as of late, and when things get chaotic, some other things suffer. You, it seems, are one of these things.
But I'll try to rectify that. I really will. I'm home now, after all, and settling back into normal life. What normal life will bring me, though, I have no idea.
Posts
About Derek
- Derek Landy
- Derek Landy writes the Skulduggery Pleasant series because getting a proper job is so overrated.
4,849 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 4401 – 4600 of 4849 Newer› Newest»(Adra. Are. You. Okay??)
Loki, what's wrong...?
I have been thinking of my past for a while, I know not why. *smirks* Worry not about me- *Leif appears on Rose's head and Kari on his own head* Found our children.
*She laughed and took Leif off her head. She rolled so her back was against Blake's chest, and cuddled her son tight*
Hello, sweetie.
Ignis: *Coos softly as Zanida strokes him, ruffling his plumage*
He marked you Rose, that's basically him saying "I like this one, I'll protect her with my own life if need be".
*Cuddles her gently*
Really...? He'd... He'd do that for me...?
*She smiled at his cuddle and relaxed against him*
Leif: *starts crying when he sees Blake*
Kari: *joins her brother in crying*
Honestly, Kari, I understand you like him not, but at least....*kisses her forehead*
Leif: Momma doesn't love Daddy! *crying harder*
Zanida: I'm a goddess of fire. I love phoenixes.
I have done it again.
One year in every ten
I manage it——
A sort of walking miracle, my skin
Bright as a Nazi lampshade,
My right foot
A paperweight,
My face a featureless, fine
Jew linen.
Peel off the napkin
O my enemy.
Do I terrify?——
The nose, the eye pits, the full set of teeth?
The sour breath
Will vanish in a day.
Soon, soon the flesh
The grave cave ate will be
At home on me
And I a smiling woman.
I am only thirty.
And like the cat I have nine times to die.
This is Number Three.
What a trash
To annihilate each decade.
What a million filaments.
The peanut-crunching crowd
Shoves in to see
Them unwrap me hand and foot——
The big strip tease.
Gentlemen, ladies
These are my hands
My knees.
I may be skin and bone,
Nevertheless, I am the same, identical woman.
The first time it happened I was ten.
It was an accident.
The second time I meant
To last it out and not come back at all.
I rocked shut
As a seashell.
They had to call and call
And pick the worms off me like sticky pearls.
Dying
Is an art, like everything else.
I do it exceptionally well.
I do it so it feels like hell.
I do it so it feels real.
I guess you could say I’ve a call.
It’s easy enough to do it in a cell.
It’s easy enough to do it and stay put.
It’s the theatrical
Comeback in broad day
To the same place, the same face, the same brute
Amused shout:
‘A miracle!’
That knocks me out.
There is a charge
For the eyeing of my scars, there is a charge
For the hearing of my heart——
It really goes.
And there is a charge, a very large charge
For a word or a touch
Or a bit of blood
Or a piece of my hair or my clothes.
So, so, Herr Doktor.
So, Herr Enemy.
I am your opus,
I am your valuable,
The pure gold baby
That melts to a shriek.
I turn and burn.
Do not think I underestimate your great concern.
Ash, ash—
You poke and stir.
Flesh, bone, there is nothing there——
A cake of soap,
A wedding ring,
A gold filling.
Herr God, Herr Lucifer
Beware
Beware.
(Gotta go...)
Oh yes I'm sure the toddler understands perfectly well Rose is friends with Blake. He sees Blake cuddling Rose, something he sees his parents do. I am sure Leif understands they're simply friends....Stay out of my life you mewling quim.
(Bye Rose. *hugs tightly*)
Ignis: *Raises a quizzical eyebrow and ignites himself. Dark purple flames roar around his body*
((Before an arguement occurs I'm going. Bye Rose and good night everyone.-Zaf
(Good night Zaf.)
'night to y'all who are leaving :( *Supermegagoodbyetacklehugsofdoom*
Ignis: *Glides gracefully over to the ground near Ellie, looking up at her with a calm, intelligent expression*
He says he can sense a great creative potential in you, and phoenixes are known for making great posers. *chuckles* I think he just wants a picture of himself.
I don't know if I'll have wifi at the other hotels...
Ignis: *Nuzzles Ellie's hand, and nips her gently"*
He says that phoenixes are majestic and awesome creatures of legend, not "li'l birdies".
Goodbye d'ae da intra.
Goodbye too lie
Ignis: *Rolls his eyes, but doesn't move lest the patting should end*
He was Xan's birthday present to me. I got him as an egg and I've been raising him this past week or so. Phoenixes grow up fast...
Ignis: *Hops up into Ellie's lap and settles down, a comforting warmth emanating from his body*
*Ignis flies back to Blake's shoulder, perching on him comfortably*
It's about time we head home, see you later.
*With a quick wave, they sink into the shadows*
(Gonna go now, 'night.)
Hell. So I've been off school for two weeks and apparently the first week i was away, we were asked to select our subjects for next year. and we have to hand them in tomorrow. AND I ONLY JUST HEARD AND IF I DON'T DO SOMETHING NOW THEY GET RANDOMLY SELECTED AND I DONT GET ANY CHOICE DDD:
Thanks, Friends and Brother, for your consideration in telling me.
Because It's not like we talk every damn day and you got lots of chances to tell me.
GAHHH
Now I'm panicking that i wont get the ones i want :(
I have to wait for one of my teachers to email me the thing to do it with and she said she would send it an hour ago
And now i also have a lot of work to do because i ask the teachers if there was anything important i missed via email and they all sent me like ten things. ten thing from four different teachers *rolls around on the ground* and it all has to be done by monday :(((((((((((((((
I hate this. can i just run away and hope the world forgets about me??
and my mum is wondering why I'm so stressed right now...
Good luck, Snow.
*makes an irritated noise in the back of her throat and mutters darkly*
Anyone on?
*hugs Rueben*
(Hello.)
(*hugs sophs leg, sat down* hello..)
(*sits down next to Silente and hugs her tightly* Hello, Silente.
Would you like to continue with the roleplay?)
(*hugs tightly back* sure...I think I was the last one to comment on it?)
(Indeed you were
Claire: So you won't run away if we let you go?
*.)
(okay)
Stacey: there wouldn't be a point..you'd only bring me back
Claire: That's true. I'm sorry if we scared you.
Stacey: scared me?? You told me a vampire was sat next to me!
Claire: Yes but she wears hello kitty pyjamas! I mean, sure that would have made Twilight a lot better, but she's practically harmless. She made me breakfast this morning.
The hello kitty pyjamas were your choice! I swear I'm burning them when I get back. And I'm not harmless.
Stacey: hello kitty? Um..
Claire: If you recall, I gave you the pink ones. Then you chose black ones. I didn't make you wear them.
Oh and... I'm not really old enough to go to this school. I'm nine. Silente is too old to go to this school by what, a century or so?
More..
Stacey: what?? How old are you??
A hundred and thirty three.
Stacey: *stares*
Claire: Wow. I'm going to buy you a walking stick and some prunes for your birthday. Just saying. Also maybe a motorbike.
I don't celebrate my birthday. Too much history.
Stacey: you have had a long history.
I meant too many bad memories.
Claire: ... If you told me when it was, I could just give you a motorbike, a walking stick and some prunes anyway? Without wrapping them up? Oh and I stole a stick from a mage you might be interested in.
(I will continue to be here.)
(Life tip:
If you have a sore ankle and it's REALLY FREAKING ANNOYING, take two pens and two hair ties, put the pens either side of the ankle, and use the hair ties to keep them on your leg.
LIKE A BOSS.
I had to do that today, and everybody was looking at me oddly on the bus back home XD
*vanishes because homework*)
(That sounds a very interesting solution, Phoe. How are you?)
(Hey guys)
(Hello, Kaden. How are you?)
(Good thanks how about you?)
You stole a stick? Um..what type?
(I am depressed. Are you doing anything interesting at the moment?)
Silente how's your writs
Claire: Oh! It's an awesome stick. It has a green orb on top. It helps you survive. If you're thirsty, you can pour water from it. Same goes for food, blood, anything really. Oh and if you're hurt it can heal you!
(the sil in blogland will have 2 brackets before her Rp)
()
*glares*
Healed.
Commander that sounds good what would it take to get it out of your hands
It...that sounds like a cool stick..
Stacey: s very cool stick..
(Claire and Silente (or at least a Silente) are elsewhere, Kaden.)
Claire: So I can give you that, a motorbike... Well, you can already use the stick to help you walk, and some prunes.
*rolls eyes* sure. Why not.
Stacey: um...*checks time* its getting late...
Claire: So when's your birthday?
Yeah... It is getting late. We should probably be getting home.
( do I have like a home??)
If you guess it I'll tell you.
Stacey: *nods and starts walking back*
(if you build one.)
( can I build one?)
Claire: So when is it?
Our house is this way, Stacey. But we'll see you tomorrow, alright?
Stacey: sure. *jumps the fence into the deserted school grounds* bye. *waves and leaves*
Ugh. Walking. *makes a portal to step through instead*
Claire: *steps through the portal*
(I sent you an email, Silente.)
Where is the real estate agent around here?
(replied)
*steps through behind her, sigils fading to virtually nothing* November.
Claire: November the...?
* hires a builder*
*house is now built*
Ahhhhh home sweet home
*sighs* twenty second. You gonna open the door or what?
Claire: Sure. *unlocks the door and steps inside the house* Hey, you want a takeaway later?
*approaches Kaden* You made yourself a house?
I was gonna make lasagna but sure, take away works too. *walks in*
*invites in*
Yeah would you lie, some pizza
Claire: *shuts the door behind her* Italian, Indian, Chinese... What do you want?
I meant like some pizza
No. I would not like pizza. I am against eating unhealthily.
Chineses. I love spare ribs in barbeque sauce. *grins*
Suit yourself
*takes a slice*
Wanna drink
*opens fridge*
I will have water, please.
Claire: *goes into the kitchen, opening a drawer* *pulls out a menu for Chinese food and hands it to her*
*places water on the coffee table*
So how has your day been
*sprawls on the couch and looks at the menu*
Hmm...I'm in an actualy eating mood so...chicken curry, egg friend rice and barbeque spare ribs. You?
Rather uneventful. I calibrated my ship's Thanix cannon, and that is about it. Yourself?
Claire: Crispy duck pancakes!
Ohhh had to deal with to thugs but other than that pretty good
*laughs* okay. That all?
*tilts head* I am the only method of law enforcement this place has. You could have found me. My ship is hardly inconspicuous.
Claire: Hm... I fancy a pizza also. *goes back to the draw, taking out another menu* Pepperoni pizza... Yes, that'll do. You want anything from here?
Could I have your number?
Nah. I've got curry and ribs. Pizza would be greedy.
I do not have a phone. *activates her holographic, orange computer on her wrist* I can, however, sync your communications device with my own somewhat. It is the same principle.
Claire: Aw come on! I'm buying! Go all out!
Zanida: *sits by the lake with Thor, wanting to just go home*
Thor: *holds her close* You know this is punishment.
Zanida: I know, don't remind me.
Thor: At least you can see me.
Zanida: Well loki isn't Odin.
*rolls eyes*
Fine. Cheese feast pizza as well. I'm going to be stuffed..
Shore
*passes phone*
(Good morning people)
(Hello.)
Claire: Okay. So one large pepperoni pizza and one large cheese feast, then chicken curry, egg fried rice, BBQ spare ribs and crispy duck pancakes? I'll handle the Italian. You can ring up the Chinese.
*takes the phone, running her computer over it* *taps on her computer for a moment before deactivating it* *hands Kaden back the phone* Done.
(Hello Garrett. Hello Raven. How are you both?)
(Good night guys)
(Goodbye Kaden.)
(Hello Rave,
Hello Soph,
Hello Sil,
how be you all?)
(I'm alright thanks Soph)
Okay. We calling now it later?
(I am depressed.)
Claire: Let's do it now. Then we'll be first on the list, won't we? Then we can go and play on the PlayStation if you want.
(Hello, (I was going to type out all your names but I've decided not to.) Hello all of you.
I'm good, well....yeah, I'll go with good. Thanks for asking.)
(Anyway i can try make you happier soph?)
(that's good? Rave *offers huggle*)
(No, Garrett. I do not believe so.)
(Well yeah, I'm living, so that's good. *takes the huggle* Thanks for your huggles.)
Okay. What's our address?
Claire: 12, Rose Mead Avenue.
(ok Soph)
(no probs Rave, its what i do (giving people huggles) )
(if anyone needs help I'm here,
just ask me for my email if you need it)
Cool.
*walks to the kitchen so she wont overhear Claire's phone call and calls the Chinese place*
...*sigh* they always take ages to pick up the god damn ph- oh hello. Yeah I'd like to order one portion of egg friend rice...yeah then one portion of chicken curry...mhm.. a side of barbeque ribs...yes in barbeque sauce...yeah and some crispy duck pancakes...yeah two orders of them thanks. Oh and can you deliever that all to 12 Rose Mean Avenue. Thanks. How long will that be? Okay bye. *hangs up*
(I'm actually just going to go. Bye.)
Claire: *pulls her phone from her pocket, dialling the Italian takeaway* Hello Steve! I need a large pepperoni pizza and a large cheese feast ASAP.
*pauses* Yes I want to use my discount.
You already know my address.
Yes, that's fine. Goodbye Steve! *hangs up*
(Goodbye Raven.)
*walks back*
Who's Steve?
*raises an eyebrow, smirking* and what discount would this be?
Claire: Steve the pizza man! And yeah he gives me 20% discount because I saved his life once by slicing the legs off some assassins then stabbing them through the back of their heads with my sword.
Okay. Sounds standard. Anyway, what to do while we wait?
(good bye Rave)
((Sigh. I'd rp but i have school...soon-Zaf
(*pats Zaf like a puppy*)
Claire: We could kill some mercenaries.
Hmmmm...tempting, but then again we could always do some normal stuff?
Claire: PlayStation?
Sure. I'm not much good at it but sure.
Claire: I have a NASCAR game. Want to play?
((I am not a puppy I am a cat.-Zaf
(*strokes Zaf like a cat* *squirts her with water*)
Course. Want to make it interesting or just a plain competition?
Claire: Okay. So... If I win, I don't have to do what you say. If I lose, it still stands. Alright? *goes into the front room and turns on the PlayStation*
Sure. That sounds fair. And that way there's virtually no downside for me.
*grins*
And still the heaven
Of final surfeit is just as far
From the door as ever. What happens between us
Happens in darkness, vanishes
Easy and often as each breath
(Hello, Adrasdos. How are you?)
Claire: *starts up the NASCAR game* *moves on to the car selection screen* Oh hey there's a car with Cheerios on the front! *selects it* Pick your car Silente!
(hey Adra!)
Cheerios? *rolls eyes*
Hmm.. *flicks through the selection and choses a car at random*
Claire: *selects just a standard oval ring circuit* *puts the car AI on so there are computer controlled cars racing with them* *starts the game* Let's go!
WAIT WHICH BUTTON DOES WHAT??
Claire: X is go. Square is break. Left joystick steer. Circle is handbrake. Triangle is change view. We don't need the rest.
*mashes down the X button, watching the screen*
Claire: *crashes into the side of Silente* Get out of the way!
Hey! *tries to correct her cars path, crashing into three cars and two barriers before regaining control and pressing down on the X button again* *leans with her car as it turns*
My troat is killing me :(
All I seem to be doing on here lately is complaining :/ sorry about that.
How are you all (if people are actually here)?
Claire: *overtakes until she's in first place* Nice skills Silente!
*throat
(*hugs Snow*)
Shut up! *pushes Claire slightly then ends up crashing into a barrier again*
*frowns* what does that symbol mean?
*a symbol telling her she's going the wrong way flashes in the corner of her screen*
(Hey, Snow, Silente, Sophia :)
I think I'll be here for a bit...)
(Hey phoe.)
Claire: You're going backwards. Spin around.
(Hello Snow and Phoe.)
The future is bulletproof,
The aftermath is secondary.
It's time to do it now and do it loud.
Killjoys, make some noise!
*drums kick in*
I cannot believe I only started listening to MCR on Tuesday... :)
(hi!
*retreats to watching rp*)
Hey Fay. How're you?
(DRUGS GIMME DRUG GIMME DRUGS I DON'T TAKE IT BUT I SELL WHAT YOU GOT TAKE THE CASH AND I'LL KEEP IT EIGHT LEGS ON THE WALL HIT THE GAS KILL EM ALL AND WE CRAWL AND WE CRAWL AND WE CRAWL YOU BE THE DETONATOR LOVE GIMME LOVE GIMME LOVE I DON'T NEED IT BUT I'LL TAKE WHAT I WANT FROM YOUR HEART AND I'LL KEEP IT IN A BAG IN A BOX PUT AN X ON THE FLOOR GIMME MORE GIMME MORE GIMME MORE SHUT UP AND SING IT WITH ME!)
*frowns and attempts to spin around*
*is now in last place*
I'm good, Snow, although my ankle's in pain. :P
You?
Claire: *is still in first place* *approaches Silente to lap her*
(@Silente: :D
NOW LET ME TELL YOU BOUT THE SAD MAN
SHUT UP AND LET ME SEE YOUR JAZZ HANDS
REMEMBER WHEN YOU WERE A MADMAN
THOUGHT YOU WAS BATMAN
HUT THE PARTY WITH A GAS CAN
KISS ME YOU ANIMAL)
I am sick and stressed but good.
(*doesn't know the slow part* ...)
*presses triangle and sees Claire behind her*
Go away! *crashes* UGH!
@Snow: *hugs* :/
I hope you get better soon!
So how's the Sherlock marathon going? :P
Claire: *overtakes* Hahahaha!
I got half way through before having homework forced apon me.
I asked the controversial-debates part of AVEN what they thought about the death penalty and the topic is now marked 'hot'.
C:
I feel a sense of achievement here.
*goes off to read*
*upon
Sleepy spelling ftw
(Right here, right now,
All the way in Battery City
Poor children raise their open, filthy palms
(Like tiny daggers up to heaven!)
And I forgot the rest. :P)
Sleep is kidnapping me. Night.
@Star: :) That's awesome!
@Snow: Homework is an abomination. Full stop. :P
(kindofnotreallycompletelyseriousbutit'sapointworthsaying)
No god damn it!
*tries to catch up and crashes again*
*mutters angrily*
@Emerald: Yes.
It is. :)
I love debates. <3
I probably need to go find a website designed for debating, but meh, this works. :) :)
Claire: *laps Silente again*
*narrows her eyes angrily, clutching the remote almost to its breaking point when the doorbell rings*
I'll get it!
*drops the remote and bolts to the door, yanking it open and smiling*
Hey.
Steve: Your pizzas are here! *hands Silente the pizza boxes* That'll be £10.25 including Claire's discount!
I'm sorry.
This topic. :O
I just found someone and I don't even know who they are but I've decided they're awesome ohmygosh.
You know when you're reminded the reasons to have faith in humanity? :O
*holds the boxes*
Right one sec.
*calls out*
Claire! Money! Ten twenty five!
Claire: Yum pizza! *runs to the door with £15 in her hand* *gives it to Steve* Keep the change!
Steve: Thank you, child! Your purchases are always appreciated. Who is your friend?
Claire: She's Silente. We're going undercover into a school to kill a murderer.
What she said. Imma put these in the front room.
*grins at Steve and walks elegantly away*
(*sigh* Bbs.)
(Alright, Silente.)
Claire: Do you have the submachine guns I ordered?
Steve: Yes, child. The MP7s have arrived. *takes two grey weapons from his bag, handing them to her*
Claire: Thanks Steve. *puts them on the ground and gives him a wad of cash amounting to about £100,000* See you soon.
Steve: Goodbye.
Claire: *shuts the door, picking up her submachine guns and carrying them into the front room* Pizza!
Pizza...and guns.
*raises an eyebrow*
Claire: Yeah I ordered some a while ago. *smiles and puts the weapons on the sofa* *sits down next to Silente, opening her pizza box* *takes a slice and starts eating*
*rolls her eyes and grabs a slice of the cheese feast*
You and your guns.
*starts eating her slice*
Hmm..one sec.
*goes to the kitchen and grabs some ketchup*
*squirts it into the pizza box then dips her pizza in, taking a bite and grinning*
Claire: ... Why would you have ketchup with pizza?
*swallows* its tasty...drinks.
*goes back to the kitchen and grabs Claire some bottled water, pouring herself some blackcurrant*
*comes back handing Claire her drink*
Claire: Thank you. *smiles, putting down her pizza to have a drink*
It's okay. You're lucky, I can't make saliva. I gotta have a drink to eat. I'm not even sure what happens to the food I eat..
*shrugs, taking a bite of pizza and a drink*
Mmm..
*doorbell goes again*
Chinese is here.
Claire: *pulls out £20 from her pocket* I'll get it! *runs to the door, opening it*
(My friend D eats pizza with ketchup. :))
*hugs Silente*
CDM: hello. You ordered the Chinese?
*eats more pizza the grabs a slice of Claire's and dips it in ketchup, putting it back afterwards*
Hehe..
Claire: Yes I did. *smiles*
(*hugs Tia(?) back tightly* your name is wrong.)
CDM: Okay. So egg fried rice, chicken curry, ribs and crispy duck pancake rolls. That's £18.99. Oh and free complimentry prawn crackers.
Claire: *passes him the £20* Keep the change.
I think it's right. Good bye...
(Goodbye Tia.)
CDM: okay. *hands over the food* *walks off, pocketing the cash*
For the record, I think very few babies/toddlers would care about their mother cuddling another man from time to time, any more than they'd have a problem with their mother cuddling another woman/other from time to time, and considering most mothers presumably know more than one person, this is bound to happen. Plenty of mums hug and kiss their friends, and plenty of mothers also hug their brothers and sisters. I don't think many babies have much of a concept of a man and a woman being together forever. For one thing, a lot of men and women aren't together forever, and there is also the existence of things such as same-sex couples and polyamorous relationships.
Also, babies are used to what is usual. They are, presumably, used to Death hugging Blake (if they're not, why would they react to a one-off hugging . . . ?), so they presumably have some concept that Blake is someone Mummy likes and often hugs. A family friend, if you will. Plenty of small children grow up with family friends. I remember when I was a small toddler, I spent a lot of time with this couple my parents were friends with because my sister was being born and so I needed babysitting by them. I didn't think that this meant that my parents didn't love me, or that they were trying to give me away. Why would I? It had never occured to me. I thought that this couple were nice people who were friends of the family and they were lookign after me while Mummy and Daddy were busy. Which is exactly what happened, and exactly what I was told.
So the only reason the twins would have to question Blake's motives and react negatively to his presence (assuming he hasn't been mean to them, which he hasn't as far as I've seen) would be if Loki had trained them to react negativity to Blake.
And why on earth would Loki do that? He had the knowledge that Death only loves Blake platonically, and besides, he obviously he wouldn't want to hurt Death in this way, because he loves her. Doesn't he?
(THANK YOU STAR)
(Yw. :))
*hugs Star*
Yes.
Claire: *shuts the door and takes the food back to the front room* *puts Silente's food next to her, her duck pancakes next to her pizza and the prawn crackers between them* *sees her pizza* Hey!
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