Thursday, September 25, 2014

The Review Competition

A few hours ago I was sent the finalists for the Gordon Edgley Book Review competition, where people had to review books that they (or anyone else) had never actually read. These reviews were BRILLIANT. We got some of the best, most imaginative responses back, and it was not easy picking winners.

But picking winners is what I had to do, and so the winners are Patricia Snake, Sophie Carter, Ella Corkum and Katie Roberts-Malpass.

Huge congratulations to the winners, and a huge congratulations to EVERYONE who entered. You have kept me entertained...!

4,638 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  2. Yes well done winners, how hard was the competition?

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  3. (Congratulations, winners.)

    (Gonna post this again on the off chance it was missed by people.)

    *Walks in*
    *Notices Phaestra*

    Who's the new person? Has she been given the usual welcome?

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  4. Phaestra: *tilts head at Blake* I am well aware of what you consider a welcome, mortal. It would, however, be unwise to attempt to greet me in such a manner.

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  5. *looks at Blake*
    Nah she hasn't...
    *looks at Phaestra*
    Sorry but I've come to a decision, no, I won't stop doing my job.

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  6. *Tilts head at Phaestra*

    One, I'm not entirely mortal. Two, a lot of people say that and a lot of people eat their own words.

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  7. Phaestra: That is your decision. I have attempted to warn you, whether you are too ignorant to act on my warning is not my responsibility.

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  8. *shrugs*
    If the gods spite me you can be sure to say I told you so.
    *watch beeps*
    Speaking of jobs.
    *waves and walks off to her tree house to get sorted*

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  9. It would seem so, which makes me all the more interested. You seem to be in a rather heated discussion with Sil regarding her career choices at the moment though, so don't mind me.

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  10. (Sil is an assassin/torturer. She also sells weapons on the side (but shh trip thinks she shut that down!))

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  11. *appears in front of sil* where are you going?

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  12. And like that you appear unoccupied.

    *Chains write around his left arm as a sword appears at his right*

    Shall we? Or are you far to high and mighty for little old me?

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  13. Phaestra: Your interest is noted, and ignored, mortal. The vampire is somewhat ridiculous.

    Minerve: *shadows spill out from the ground and solidify into her form* It would be easier to simply dispose of her.

    Phaestra: That is not going to happen, Minerve.

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  14. *nods at him and walks past, jumping into her tree house*
    *grabs a cloak and pulls it on around her*
    *grabs a ballroom mask and fits it in place*

    *grabs a sorry note, written in English and slips it into the coat pocket before pulling the hood up over her face*

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  15. (i need some help for a name, i plan on making the god of vengeance, but I'm not sure what to call him any ideas?)

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  16. (don't worry I've got a name its: Asylius)

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  17. (The god of justice and vengeance that I have designed is called Lirux.)

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  18. (fine he is the god of war and violence)

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  19. (Hmmm...

    What film should I half watch?
    Bad teacher
    St. Trinians
    St. Trinians 2
    Breaking dawn part 2
    Or Frozen?)

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  20. (If I were Chi I'd say Frozen.

    However, I'm not and I refuse to let her love of that movie rub off on me so I'd say either of the St. Trinians because who likes Twilight?)

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  21. *hasn't seen any of those films, Silente, sorry.*
    *um*
    *Which do you most feel like watching?*

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  22. (*hugs Chi* Frozen is amazing. Don't dis da Frozen. Don't. Dis. Da. Frozen.)

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  23. (I COULD do st 1 then st 2....

    Nah imma just watch st 2)

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  24. (Aaaaaaaaaanyways let's finish it, shall we?)

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  25. (ares is gone and kratos is now gone too, its Asylius as the only god i need)

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  26. (Split between this and a six page essay, I'm sure we can manage.)

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  27. (welcome back.)

    *does one last check in the mirror and steps forwards into a portal, into a quiet alleyway*
    *quickly starts scaling the wall to her left*

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  28. Hello soph, say hello to the owner of Asylius the god of war and violence)

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  29. Tia Halcyon Desjani said...

    Hello!

    *is cooking something*

    *can't cook*

    *looks at recipe for disaster*

    *nods and hums approvingly*

    ((Congrats to the winners, having a Gordon Edgley poster is amazing!))

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  30. (Hello, Garrett?)


    Minerve: Watch the vampire act out pointless acts of violence and know how much of a failure you are.

    Phaestra: I have not failed yet, Minerve.

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  31. (Pretty sure I still had the demon inside me when we started so I'll go back to that for this one fight.)

    *Blake's body grows larger and more muscular, his skin darkening and growing hard as iron. His red eyes flash as a toothy grin spreads across his face*

    Come and get some, shorty.

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  32. (*pokes flick*)

    *reaches the roof and crouched, looking around*
    *all clear*
    *walks towards the skylight*

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  33. (stumbles back in surprise* hello inky *offers hug/high five (<pick one), soph I've decided to make my own god like you have so Asylius is the god of war and violence and there is no other gods of war)

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  34. Phaestra: *her hand glows white as a gold shield with the image of a phoenix in front of a sun appears in her grip*

    Minerve: It is pointless, you know. She will never learn.

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  35. (Hi
    *accepts hug* ive had a crap day)

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  36. (*hugs inky* do you want to talk about it?)

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  37. *inspects the alarm system on the skylight*
    *all wires on the inside*
    *but the floor can't be pressure sensetive, people are walking across it*
    *but smashing glass is too noisy*
    *hmm...*
    *diamond laser*

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  38. Hello undefeated warrior guy and that hot vampire chick and the guy who wants his own pub/hotel/supermarket and the girl with the golden gun and a complete stranger!

    (Hi, Xan! I am Tia Halcyon the Warrior Chronomancer. Pleasure to meet you)

    *looks at the jacket potatoes and Lincolnshire sausages in the oven*

    If only I knew the correct oven temperature and cooking times for these. Oh well, too late for that!

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  39. (my chem teacher threatened to susped me )

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  40. Phaestra: *vanishes in a flash of light, and reappears beside Silente as the light solidifies into her form* *raises her shield, and draws her sword*

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  41. *Dark red fire spreads up his arms as a laugh escapes him*

    That we shall.

    *With a roar, massive bat-like wings rip free of his back and he charges forward, grabbing Xan by the face with a flaming hand and forcing him into the ground*

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  42. (hello Tia, yes I've done many things welcome to my mind its, your making me hungry :D)

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  43. (*sighs* I missed both her lessons last week cos I was ill, which she knew

    I had her for the first time snce then. She asked if I copied up, I said I didtnt. I don't know anyone in my class so I didn't ask for anyones books. if I don't copy up tonight I will be suspended from her lessons)

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  44. CHloe, that sucks. :(
    *hugs*
    Do you have the notes to copy up now?

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  45. (Hello Taia!)

    (@Chloe why on earth would she threaten to suspend you? I have done things I'm not proud of, things that should have seen me suspended, and yet I've never even been threatened about it.)

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  46. Phaestra: I believe that your actions speak for themselves.

    Minerve: *shadows flow from Silente, landing on the ground in front of her* *the shadows solidify into her form*
    Do not stop nature, Phaestra.

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  47. (*hugs* I do now. this woman did it infront of the class aswell.. cos I have confidence as it is infront of peope. -__- oh well. its over now

    *smiles* how is everyone?)

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  48. *Spreads his wings in the air, hovering above Xan's head*

    Do I really need a reason? If I had to guess I'd say it's because it's fun.

    *A wave of chaos flames rushes towards Xan, burning up the ground*

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  49. *glares at Min*
    I'm not your personal taxi service. Anyway I have a job to do. Why don't you too natter on elsewhere.
    *turns back to the skylight*

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  50. (I'm cool, at least its over now and we can cheer you up (right everybody?) and now you have the notes everything should go fine, why because i say SO! and welsh luck says so too.)

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  51. *appears next to inky* delivery for inky flame!

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  52. Minerve: I am allowing you to do your job.

    Phaestra: And I am standing in your way. She *points at Minerve* killed one of your friends. And she agrees with your actions. That is evidence enough that what you are doing is wrong.

    Minerve: *shadows knot together to form a short sword in her hand* I wish to allow her to do whatever she wishes - because no matter what that is, people will die.

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  53. (Hehe thnx Gar ^^)
    *turns to him* hi! What's this delivery?

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  54. (Hehe thnx Gar ^^)
    *turns to him* hi! What's this delivery?

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  55. Its a present and your welcome *winks and smiles*

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  56. *sighs and turns to them both*
    You sound like squabbling children.

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  57. Felix: *rodes I to where Xan and Blake are* to, wassup?

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  58. *grins* thank you!
    *looks at the present* you shouldn't have

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  59. @Chloe: Hopefully as she gets to know you & the class, she will become a little more lenient & respectful to you. I think this is the case a lot of the time with teachers? Especially if they still aren't sure that everybody is actually there to take the subject seriously, and such. *nods*

    Are you doing alright aside from that?

    And- I'm fine, thanks. Drawing. :) ^^

    WBD

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  60. Phaestra: Think about what you are doing, vampire.

    Minerve: Or don't. Vampires only rely on instincts.

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  61. (I'm doing good
    I got out most of the frustrations out in golf)

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  62. Jesus Christ you actually ARE squabbling children. Okay let's be organised. Min you say your reasoning first. Phae you go after.

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  63. So are you going to open it (it is what ever you want it to be ;)
    taia i think your right,)

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  64. *The blast of lava causes him to falter in the air a bit, but simply drips off his wing*

    Then we have more in common than I thought.

    *He gently to the ground, changing back to human form as he lands. Drawing his sword and shield, Blake locks his senses to Xan and dashes forwards with blinding speed*

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  65. Minerve: You are free to do what you want. You can kill whoever you want, whenever you want. Who is she to say any different? Death is a natural part of life.


    Phaestra: She is agreeing with you only so you can kill. She is the goddess of death, Silente Tempest. You have seen how beautiful a human life is. She is the one wishing you to take them. Stop what you are doing and return home.

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  66. *opens it*
    *it is a scrap book*
    *smiles* thank you, Gar. Ive been meaning to get one.

    Felix: Wow guys, what the problem Blake?

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  67. (that's a good thing inky letting it out on golf, because once its out its gone and not still bubbling away inside of you)

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  68. 't's good, Chloe. :)
    *nods at what Garrett's said, because yes* ^^

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  69. (yes, but my golf teacher told me to calm down and not hit the ball so hard XD I can get the rest out in kung fu on Sunday)

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  70. Which home Phae? The child hood one? The empty one? And what of this job? If I dont then someone else will be sent to complete it, and to dispatch of me aswell.

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  71. You are most welcome *smiles back* do you want to go on a trip somewhere?

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  72. *grins* Okay, where did you have in mind?

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  73. Felix: *changes into demon form* WHo are you and why are you attacking Blake?

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  74. Phaestra: Your job is irrelevant. I will not allow you - or anyone else - to accomplish this job, or any other.

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  75. (look on the bright side, you hit the ball not someone else, you do king fu, what's it like? (I've never done it) )

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  76. *The tail swipe that should have knocked his head clean off passed through thin air, Blake leaping up from his crouch with a shield bash to Xan's head. His eyes glowing particularly bright*

    On the contrary, my demon form is just physically strong.

    *A barrage of slashes tears through the space between them*

    I'm far more agile like this.

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  77. *laughs*
    Whatever.
    *turns back to the sky light, pulling a glass cutter from her cloak*
    *switches it on and starts cutting a hole roughly small enough for her to fit through*

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  78. (Hi Inky, Gar, Blake, Sil, Sophia, Gaia)

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  79. @Chloe: Aw xD

    @Garrett: *laughs* THat's a good point. ^^

    Hi Edward! :)


    *hovers in the distance*

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  80. (It is awesome ! the branch I do teaches you how to use weapons. but I wont learn that until I go up grades, im currently a no grade)

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  81. (hello boyoh) where do you want to go? I can shadow walk anywhere in the world

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  82. Phaestra: *waves her hand and the glass cutter ceases to work* You are not doing this.

    Minerve: *steps closer to Phaestra* There is nothing you can do.

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  83. (thank you taia for agreeing with me its true, inky that sounds awesome (this is the destructive part of me talking) what kind of weapons are you going to learn to use?)

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  84. ((Serious question to everybody:

    What is your life ambition? Do you have a goal in life? What are you doing to achieve it? (Go to college, university etc))

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  85. *frowns when the glass cutter doesn't work*
    *sees the target below*
    SHIT!
    *smashes the glass, setting off alarms, and falls with the shards, landing on the target and pinning him, one hand over his mouth and nose to keep him quiet*

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  86. (I do not, especially, have a goal in life. I just wish to continue as I am. It's not like I can do anything else.)

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  87. Phaestra: *transforms into a sphere of light which latches on to Silente, and transports her quickly to her realm*

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  88. (Goal in life? To be happy and enjoy life every day)

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  89. (I wanna be a vet ^^)
    *smiles* HI Ed

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  90. (my plan is to become a games tester, basically i test games in production and check for bugs and glitches and other problems and tell the designers to fix it) what part of Scotland do you want to go to?

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  91. *finishes glass and throws it behind him*

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  92. ("To be happy" isn't exactly helpful, but I guess it's something)

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  93. (that's cool Gar ^^)
    hmm, Edinburgh?

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  94. *growls when her target disappears*
    DAMN IT!
    *rips the mask off and the hood down*
    WHAT THE HELL!!!

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  95. *His pre-positioned shield blocks the slices, though he still tumbles along the ground*

    Big guns it is then...

    *He takes a strange stance, spreading his feet and holding his sword straight out behind himself*

    Irrita ars, vastare VULNUS!

    *At the last word he brings his sword around in a massive slash, aiming at Xan but not moving from his stance as his sword passes through the air*

    *And then, the landscape shifts. A massive rend opening in the path of his attack as the extended strike takes effect*

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  96. Phaestra: I could not allow you to do this. What do you wish to gain by killing others?


    Minerve: *jumps down and impales Silente's target through the chest with her sword, driving it all the way through to the ground* *their body begins to crumble and turn to ash*

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  97. (@Xan; Appears we really do have more in common than I thought.)

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  98. Food mainly. And as sadistic as it sounds, entertainment.

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  99. *turns to Ed* wanna come to Scotland?

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  100. Phaestra: You can find food and entertainment wherever you go in your world.
    You will remain here until you decide to change your mind.

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  101. *shadow walks to Edinburgh zoo* is this place ok (I went here earlier this year it was really cool and i saw the pandas, the day i went was really hot so they mostly hiding in the shade)

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  102. (it is fine ^^, I want to be a zoo vet when im old, providing I can get into vet uni) *looks around* awesome!

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  104. (And you are horribly pessimistic, please don't ruin the mood.)

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  105. *sits in wolf enclosure* hello there *wolf approaches* hello there

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  106. (Gar, I can travel in time and space, thanks though)

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  107. *looks at Ed*
    *smiles* wolves seem to be attracted to you

    *pets wolf*

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  108. Wolves are great *another wolf lies down next to him*

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  109. @Tia: I never know how to respond to that question, and at this juncture at least, I don't think I really mind where I am, physically? I want to be comfortable with myself & not hurting people & OK with the world. And I think that those are all more about mental state, and that there are several different places I could go and things I could do, and still reach those criteria?
    Because I guess that to me the only way I'll ever get to a point where I DO know what I want to do is by actually doing things. I'll go to university but I don't know what I'll study, yet, and I don't know what I'll do once I finish it, but hopefully in several years' time I will have a better idea of where I want to be going?
    And if I still don't, I'll find Things to do, and... I'll still be doing things?
    idk. I just figure that wherever I end up, I'll be somewhere, and I can still be those first three things I mentioned while I'm there?
    So to paraphrase: I have no idea, but I'm OK with that. :)

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  110. (ok ed) lets go and look at the animals, *arrives at the meerkats enclosure* so I've tickets to see the pandas later if you want to come inky and ed?

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  111. Phaestra: This is imprisonment. Not kidnapping. Is this not better than being cursed?
    As long as you are here, you will not die - even if you do not have food of any description for a thousand years. Your magic will not work. You will be unable to escape.
    Have a think about your actions. There is nothing else for you to do here.

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  112. Yes they are
    *looks deep into a wolf's eyes*
    *it whimpers then lays on its back, exposing its belly*
    *smooths it*

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  113. what you want to see next? *smiles*

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  114. You're f***ing kidnapping me!
    *plays with her engagement ring to calm herself*
    Take me back.

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  115. *Chuckles as he pulls his sword free of Xan's tail, his eyes glowing bright red*

    Actually, I did. You can't fool my eyes with movements as slow as that. How about another big one, eh?

    *He leaps away from Xan, and hurls his sword at him*

    Irrita ars, dolor.

    *As his blade passes centimeters from Xan's head, he slams an open palm into his gut and dashes past him, leaving the word "dolor" inscribed on his flesh*

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  116. Alright then I'll tell you when its time, you two coming *goes to see rhinos*

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  117. Phaestra: Prove to me that you can be taken back without you killing anyone. Then, perhaps, I will.

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  118. (@Xan; Our hopes for the future are the same.)

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  119. The electric fence. *pokes it* *jumps in pain* it is electric

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  120. *winces* yes it is *follows Gar to the rhinos*

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  121. Let me get this straight, you've kidnapped me to sit me in the naughty corner?

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  122. (Gar, have you heard the song 'differences between the English and the welsh? ?)

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  123. *appears outside enclosure* ok,rhinos *walks after them*

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  124. Ed teleport over when your ready, *arrives at rhinos* you know what inky?

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  125. Phaestra: If that is the way you wish to look upon the situation, mortal.

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  126. *takes pictures of all the animals* this will be perfect for my new scrap book!
    *takes a photo of Ed and Gar*

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  127. *tilts head* what?

    (Ahem. I dedicate this page to all you awesome people here ^^ You always cheer me up and you all make me laugh)

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  128. (what song difference?) (ignore the first part of my last comment ed)

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  129. (Thank you ^^

    The song is called
    'differences between the English and the welsh)

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  130. (hear hear) pose with me ed, i want i rhino!

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  131. *takes a photo of Ed and Gar posing * Great guys!

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  132. (It is quite funny
    it is fromm the pov of a welsh person
    'they have girlfrieds we have sheep' I was reduced to tears)

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  133. (it sounds it, ill look it up now brb)

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  134. Phaestra: You do not understand, mortal. You are in my domain. I will not be taking you back. Not until you have shown me proof.

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