A few hours ago I was sent the finalists for the Gordon Edgley Book Review competition, where people had to review books that they (or anyone else) had never actually read. These reviews were BRILLIANT. We got some of the best, most imaginative responses back, and it was not easy picking winners.
But picking winners is what I had to do, and so the winners are Patricia Snake, Sophie Carter, Ella Corkum and Katie Roberts-Malpass.
Huge congratulations to the winners, and a huge congratulations to EVERYONE who entered. You have kept me entertained...!
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man 1: nope sorry
man 2: not recently
man 3: why do you ask?
(okay, just ignore my comment)
(no we will use yours please)
*walks over to the third man, where was this circus?
(kay ^^)
Person 3: *shrugs* about half an hour, west. may have moved by now
Thank you *gives the man some money and runs outside*
(*runs up and hugs Sophia*)
(Hello. I Msd for food...which might take a while to eat because throat...
How is everyone?
Also Soph wanna continue where you left off when I fell asleep last night?)
*snaps fingers and motorbike appears, gets on and tears of in the direction of the circus*
So, what's your story?
Tawnee: there isn't much to say...
Sure there is *smiles*
Tawnee: um, can you tell me where the bathroom is
Sure, it's just out there
*tawnee dashes out the door and goes after Gar*
Wait! *runs after her*
(Hello Sil and El ^^)
(Hey Sil!!
Aw.. that's too bad.
Sore throat buddies! :/
*high fives her*)
(Hey El! Enjoy math!:))
*she huddles under the tree, hugging her knees to her chest*
*even though she's healed she can feel the horrible pain still*
(Hello Sil and El)
*arrives at the circus and gets of the bike* right, now to find the ringmaster *pulls kukri out*
Ringmaster :*sees Gar* welcome good Sir! Have you come to witness beings you will never see again?
(*hugs El*)
(Yey...sore throat buddies...)
Tawnee: *runs*
Wait up! whats wrong?
Tawnee: gar will get himself killed!
(Sorry, I disappeared briefly.)
(welcomes Soph ^^)
(hey Soph, wanna continue?)
(Gar? you here?)
Minerve: Build, mortal.
No. Let me rest
(Hey Sophia!)
*she tenses at the sound of Silente's voice, trying to push herself into the tree*
(love dis song
Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster, faster
So testosterone boys and harlequin girls,
Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?
So testosterone boys and harlequin girls,
Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?)
Minerve: There will be no rest. If you rest, I will refuse to lift what Phaestra has done.
(brb)
(hi El, how art thou?)
*glares*
*gets up, arms crossing over her chest*
What does this shrine do.
(okay Gar)
Minerve: To you? Nothing.
*tenses at the hug, looking fearfully up*
*when she realizes it is just El she relaxes into her arms, letting herself be lead to her house*
*collapses on the bed*
Thanks..
How does ir help you?
Heyy guys! It's been a while! How are you all?
What's going on atm?
Minerve: It boosts my strength closer - but not equal to - that in my realm inside the shrine and in the immediate area around it.
(Heyyyu Rhyd! It's been ages! I am good, you?)
(Hello, Rhydian.)
Right.
*why does that not sound good*
heya Inky! I'm good!
Hi Soph! How are you?
(I am average, yourself?)
Minerve: Build.
(Good good ^^ )
I'm good thanks.
So what's going on atm?
I am not your slave.
(Hey Rhydian!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's been way too long!!!!!!
I be sick... :/
How be's yous?! How be's yous eyes?!)
(Silente kind of pissed off the goddess of life, light and creation who made her be unable to kill people or harm people.
Silente turned to the goddess of death for help, who made her torture herself, torture Dugglyn and is now making Silente build her a shrine in return for lifting the measures Phaestra (the goddess of life etc.) put in place.)
Minerve: That can soon change. Now build.
Yo Sil! How are you?
Dugglyn!! I'm good, bit sick too, and my eyes are okayyy!!!!!!!!!!
That can soon change?
*laughs*
Hello. :)
(Hiya Taia ^^ how are you Bach?)
(Some god made Silente a deal that she can't attack or hurt people anymore but then she broke the deal so now she is forced to do it so she went to the other god (Minny) and she made Sil do 3 tasks. Torture herself. Torture me (Dugglyn) and build a shine for Min)
heya Taia! How are you fwend?
(Hello, Taia. How are you?)
Minerve: *tilts head* If you refuse to build, I will refuse to lift what Phaestra has done. This is your last chance before I leave you.
(Hey Taia! How be's yous?! How be's yous eyes?!
And too bad you're sick! Get well sooooon! Glad your eyes are good!)
*pauses*
*mutters angrily and starts building*
Hi Chloe! Hi Rhydian! Hi, Sophia! :)
I'm good, thanks! Doing homework and absolutely not procrastinating and/or falling asleep. :P
How are you all?
(I will be back soon.)
Minerve: *watches*
I'm good Taia! Bit ill, very bored and listening to music.
(I am eating, which is good ^^)
Mmmmmmmmm fooood
HELLO
(I am such a picky eater, I will only eat a few things, mostly meat)
(Star! How art thou?)
HELLO STARRY! How are you?
Hi Dugglyn!
I am good and my eyes are tired. :)
Thanks for asking. :)
Hey Silente!
ANd how are you both, also? ^^
Ok, Sophia. ^^
@Rhydian: IT's a shame about ill and boredom, and I hope both improve soon, but good is still good, so, :)
@Chloe: Yay! :P / :)
(Hey Star!!)
I am happy!
C got me a (belated) birthday present, which was one of thos mugs . . .
"I have CDO
It's like OCD, but with the letters in alphabetical order AS THEY SHOULD BE"
Love it so much. :) It's brilliant. :) :) :) She gave it to me in maths and I was just collapsed over my desk laughing even though I knew it was coming. :)
And I also have rainbow-coloured elbow-length fingerless gloves, and OH MY GOSH THEY'RE SO FAB. C:
I love these gloves so much, like . . . :O They're so bright and colourful and cozy and warm and cool-looking. :)
So yeah. :) In a pretty good mood . . .
Leaving in ten minutes, but I'll be back half an hour after that. :)
Hi Star! :)
How are you?
@Chloe: *laughs* Conversely, I'm pretty sure most of what I DON'T eat is meat. :P
*waves to EVERYONE! :)*
(I would die without meat...I live of the stuff)
(*waves at Star*)
(back,
Hello to everybody)
(Inks please resume when ready)
(I am ready
I did a comment on the ringleader)
*works on building the stupid shrine, not being very careful*
*waves back at Inky :)*
I like some meat quite a lot.
But I also love some fruit.
And like, bread. I like bread.
And like, yeah, no idea where this paragraph is going. XD
It's harder to type in these gloves . . . my fingers are a bit stiffer. O_O
@Star: YAY! :D
That sounds awesome. :) :) :)
@Chloe: I'm pretty sure I still eat meat daily, just a lot of it I don't like that much? :P
HI Garrett! How are ye? :)
I mean, I can still type really quickly, but that's because I'm a NINJA. C:
@Taia: Yes, it is! :) :) *hugs*
Hello, Blogland!
PSA CHLOE IS AWESOME OK?
(hello Tia!)
Gtg now :( BYE!
I want a hug...
(byii Rhyd :()
*hugs Death* :/
(*hugs Death tightly*)
(brrr. Cold.)
Rhy...
@Star: *laughs* :)
And- *huggles back* Good! :3
Hi Tia!
How are you? :)
*very agreement*
(hello Taia, I'm good thanks) (ok Inks)
ok ringmaster *goes to find a seat*
(*hugs Deathy*)
*Hugs Star and Penguin back tightly*
My dog... She sleeps beside me... She couldn't breathe...
(Bye, Rhydian!)
*pulls Rose into a warm hug*
((I have just discovered your Twitter, Rose. *is pleasantly surprised*))
*And hugs Sil*
Ringmaster: the show doesn't start for an hour, why don't you look around?
Tawnee: *runs and finds Gar* Don't!
*catches up, out of breath* hey
RIngmaster: looks like little Taw has returned to us *smirks*
*Cuddles Tia too*
(I have Twitter, yes. And I post some weird stuff...)
(@Deathy you're beautiful and wonderful and amazing.)
(I agree with Sil, Death)
*an angry look settles on my face, as i pull out a sawn-off shotgun and shoot the ringmaster*
(I agree with Sil - you're a wonderful person, Rose.)
Minerve: *watches the shrine take shape*
Ringmaster: *dodges the bullet, moves swiftly besides Tawnee* Sweetheart, remember that night
Tawnee: *shakes*
*cant speak*
*shifts into semi wolf form* wait up Buddy, get away from her
...
I'm not...
But what I am is: getting off this subject....
*huggles Rose*
Your dog couldn't breath?! Is she ok?! Are you ok?!
*runs at the ringmaster dropping the gun as i go and draws the kukri* *swings for him*
She's okay now... She must have inhaled something and was trying to clear her nose. I'm really not okay ... It's three am and I'm crying in fear...
I'm weak...
(And isn't that great timing.
I haven five people to dedicate this page to.
Star - You're so bubbly and energetic and analysistic (not a word) and I think you're great .
El - You're awesome and friendly and I love our email rp's. Yeah.
Chi - You're beautiful and both me and Blake love you (different types of love) and I can't wait till November 15th.
Soph - Yes. You're the nicest bitch I know. I say that with the up most respect and love. Thanks for being here for me.
Deathy - I'm real glad you're here and you're beautiful and wonderful and amazing and I am going to make a habit of telling you.
If you weren't dedicated to don't feel bad please...)
Rm : *dodges* why do you bother ?
Tawnee: *just shakes*
Glad she's ok...!!
Aww....
You're not weak! That would be extremely scary...
*hugs her*
Please, don't...
I'm a waste of pixels...
And comments...
So I'm just gonna go now...
(Hear hear
Don't go Death...)
(*feels bad* :P
Just joking!!!!!
HERE HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU ARE ALL WONDERFUL PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!)
Because i want retribution for Tawnee, its not nice what you did and so you have to pay for your crimes *throws shadows at him*
(@Death ...:( sorry..)
(Thank you, Silente.)
(Bye Deathy...!!
You're not a waste. Remember that!!!!!)
(sorry had to vanish suddenly. And wbd, now)
Oh, ROse, *hugs* :(
Rm: *reflects the shadows back at him * pathetic
Tawnee: no! *jumps infront of the shadows*
*growls*
*swipes dagger at rm,*
*he doesn't realize and gets hit
Minerve: *tilts head and keeps watching*
(youre welcome Soph)
*keeps slowly and carelessly building*
Orpheus: *spots Dug in El's house*
Hello.
Minerve: Work faster, mortal.
*looks over her shoulder at Min*
Do I have slave written on me? No, I do not. So no, I will not work faster.
*keeps going at her slow pace*
Minerve: *strides forward, and uses her sword to carve the word 'slave' into Silente's back*
Think again.
*cries out and drops the brick when she starts the 'S,' slapping Min hard across the face before she can finish that one letter*
Bitch!
Minerve: *tilts head* That was not the wisest decision you have ever made.
I would kill you, usually - slowly and painfully. But I believe it may harm you more to stay as you are with the measures Phaestra put into place.
You have had your chance.
Luckily you have completed enough of the shrine to allow it to be considered a mortal construction.
*raises her hand and the shrine completes itself - fixing the mistakes Silente made along the way* *a black shimmer runs across the brickwork*
Goodbye, mortal. *vanishes in a mist of shadow*
(are you here Gar?)
*looks up startled*
Oh. Hi Orpheus!
(t(-.-t) this ringleader is going to meet the pain train)
(lol, that's a good one ^O^)
*stares*
Shit...shit shit shit shit shit that was not a good move to make!
*looks at the shrine*
I...I gotta fix this...
*smashes a hand against it, hard*
Orpheus: *smiles* you seem jumpy Dugglyn?
*throws more shadows at the ringmaster and runs to Tawnee* are you ok?
Minerve: *the bricks take no damage*
*a whisper reaches Silente's ears* A shrine, once made, cannot be unmade.
I am lying in bed with a violent head cold and a large stack of textbooks that I'm meant to be reading. Quick, somebody tell me a joke to cheer me up.
*her eyes dart around, checking to see if anyone else is in the room*
A bit..
Tawnee: Please, leave. Im not worth you getting hurt...
Rm: *falls as he gets slashed with dagger*
*gets hit with shadows*
*falls unconscious*
Quick, let everyone free!!
I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
Knock knock!
(ok Clars, 2 chavs in a car with no music playing, what car is it,
a police car)
(Hey Annika! Why are so many people sick!? (Including me...))
(old mother hubbard went to her cuboard to fetch her doggy a bone
when she bent over
up jumped Rover
HE GAVE HER A BONE OF HIS OWN!
hi Anni)
Yellow.
Duck...I...duck...ducky ducky duck duck.
*starts chanting Phaestra over and over in her head*
Orpheus: wanna talk about it?
(That disturbs me, Chloe.)
Yellow who?
(what can I say... )
Oh Inky, doth thou knowst a single clean joke?
(look on my profile, theres one there)
Phaestra: *appears in a flash of light which solidifies into her form*
Yellow paper!!!!
*laughs hysterically, slapping her head*
That's a head slapper!!!
*laughs hysterically*
*picks up shotgun and walks over to the rm and aims the gun at his head*
(gtg to circuit training, byii!
be back latyer)
*looks at Phae*
I want to build you a shrine
Goodbye Inky.
Phaestra: And why is that? *sees Minerve's shrine* *shoulders sag* Do you have any idea what you have just done?
I'm not staying. I just stopped by because I'm all sad and sick. I'm going to do my homework.
Farewell.
No. I don't.
*continues laughing*
*milk come out her nose*
*it hits Clara*
*laughs harder*
Someone asked a detective, "Why are you under a bed sheet?"
The detective replied, "I'm Undercover."
No... I'm fine. Thanks though.
*looks at Orpheus*
What are you doing here?
Aww, bye Clara!!!!
Nobody expects the sudden name change.
Not. Even. Sophia.
SILENTE
Thank you so much for the blog post. :) :) *hugshugs* :) :)
Phaestra: Minerve is nearly as powerful as she is in her realm, now. She is more powerful than I. More powerful than any other god in this place, you imbecile.
(I will be back soon.)
(ok Inks)
*wanders back in*
Hey, hey, hey.
Why did the mermaid wear seashells?
She grew out of her B-shells.
(Ill be back)
Oh my god.. Clara!
*groans*
You're as bad as my grandpa!
Why did the hipster burn his tongue?
*climbs up on the ol' stand-up comedy stage*
He drank his coffee before it was cool.
*laughs hysterically*
Now that was funny!!!!
(*may or may not be trying to find Silente's first comment*
*found Clara's*)
I think something happens in something, and I'm trying to look it up but none of the GCSE sites mention it. -_-
*laughs* XD
Hey Dugglyn, hey, hey Dugglyn, what do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta.
:)))))) XDXDXD
*howls with laughter*
Gosh, you know, when I found out my toaster wasn't waterproof, I was shocked!
(Sorry step dad stole my phone)
Orpheus: I was sleeping?
Then help me fix it! If I build you a shrine you can match her ability thus everything is a bit more hunky dory..
I have decided that even though I get to talk to you peeps all day I don't like skipping school.)
Clara Clra Clara XD XD XD
I've never skipped school . . .
*adjusts microphone*
One time, me and some friends put on a performance about puns. It was basically just a play on words.
*puts on sunglasses*
*YEEEEEEEEAH*
I myself am homeschooled. I don't even get to skip school when I'm sick, as is evidence by today.
Audience Member: That wasn't funny!
It wasn't a joke!
Audience Member: Boo! Hiss!
*evidenced
(Well I'm sick so....
It's fine. I wouldn't just cut school!)
This again . . . XD
I skip school when I'm ILL (sometimes . . .).
But that isn't SKIPPING. That's being ILL.
And I hate missing school because of illness . . . you have to catch up and I hate it. ;/
(I am back.)
(Is EVERYONE sick??)
Orpheus: *to dug* I was asleep. I heard the door and came to see what it was.
@Dugglyn: Being ill doesn't count as skipping. :P
I say so and I have elbow-length rainbow-coloured fingerless gloves so I am the master of everything. :)
Wait, Dugglyn, you're sick too? Oh, poor thing?
*hugs Dugglyn*
*it's okay to hug Dugglyn because we are both sick, so I won't contaminate her*
*whispers* What do you call a man who shaves twenty times a day?
A barber.
Phaestra: *places her hands at either side of her head, giving Silente the details about her shrine*
Minerve will attempt to stop you. I will try and hold her off, though I fear I am not strong enough to last exceptionally long.
I'll work as fast as I can. Bricks?
C's ill . . .
She was still in school though. She was just dying.
(Actually, she should've stayed off. In physics she was just sat there not doing work because she felt too ill.
(Me: But you're well enough to make the mental decision not to do work.
Her: But that doesn't require much brainpower.
Me: Neither does drawing a results table. :P)
Which is hardly productive and it's not like she'd going to get much more work done by coming in . . .
Phaestra: *raises her hand, and bricks and building equipment fade into existence*
*nods*
*taps the sigil that will lend her extra speed*
*moves as a basically invisible blur, placing blocks accurately, burning energy quickly, working as fast as she physically can*
(Yeah, that's what I mean. I normal just tough it out but I don't want to get other people sick and I have Irish dance on Wednesday and I'm missing it on Friday so I want to be better by Wednesday. But at least by Friday cause we're going up to the mountains and if I'm not better my ears will be clogged the whole time and it would be bad.
Meh.. and I'm doing a project with someone and I have the flash drive and I forgot to send it to school with my brother so she had to do nothing and I don't have all the notes and blah!)
*rolls on the ceiling with laughter*
These are awesome!!!!
(*walks in while the terminator 2 theme tune plays*)
@Dugglyn: *nods* That makes sense . . . :/ Well, I hope you get better soon. :)
Oh dear. :O
(That's what I thought also Sil! Why is everyone sick?!
It is cold season..
I hate drinking fluids. I don't drink enough water but... Meh. Idk..)
Minerve: *steps out from her shrine with her sword in her hand*
Phaestra: *raises her hand and her golden sword appears in her hand, and her shield in her other hand*
Minerve: The mortal was so kind to make me a shrine, Phaestra. You know you cannot defeat me.
Phaestra: I know. Which is why defeating you is not my intention. Not yet.
(Its a blogland epidemic!)
*works quicker when Min appears, anger making her faster*
I'm writing up an experiment on dissolving salt in water (which makes the temperature go up).
I've explained about how the aslt dissolves, and I've explained about how the energy change works.
Do I need to do anything else?
@Silente: I think it's just a world epidemic. :P
Oh
hah
"JUST a world epidemic"
XD
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