Friday, April 26, 2013

The Synopsis

135,499 words and counting.

My editor has been asking me for a synopsis for ages now. They need it so that they can send it to sites like Amazon, so they can put it up to inform people what it is they'll be buying. I took a few minutes today to write it, and before I go to bed tonight, I figured my Minions deserved to see it first.


Last Stand of Dead Men:

War has finally come.

But it's not a war between good and evil, or light and dark- it's a war between Sanctuaries. For too long now, the Irish Sanctuary has teetered on the brink of world-ending disaster, and the other Sanctuaries around the world have had enough. Allies turn to enemies, friends turn to foes, and Skulduggery and Valkyrie must team up with the rest of the Dead Men if they're going to have any chance at all of maintaining the balance of power and getting to the root of a vast conspiracy that has been years in the making.

But while this war is only beginning, another war rages within Valkyrie herself. Her own dark side, the insanely powerful being known as Darquesse, is on the verge of rising to the surface. And if Valkyrie slips, even for a moment, then Darquesse will burn the world and everyone in it.

4,918 comments:

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Niccolò Croatoan said...

Hello. I'm very distant, but here.

Mary Contrary said...

Welcome back, Mel!
Hi, Niccolo!

Melica Frost said...

actually, scratch that I need to go sleep now guys so byebye :)

Mary Contrary said...

Bye, Mel!

wbd/msd

Niccolò Croatoan said...

Hello, Taia. How are you faring today?

Jophiel said...

Hi Niccolo!! I am in an uncharacteristically happy mood!

Jophiel said...

*Skips around happily and does the Toyota jump*

Jophiel said...

I use the deadwood to make the fire rise
The blood of innocence burning in the skies
I filled my cup with the rising of the sea
And poured it out in an ocean of debris

Mary Contrary said...

I'm faring well, thank you, Niccolo. And yourself?
Hi, Death!

Jophiel said...

HI TAIA!!

HOW I EVERYONE?!

Jophiel said...

*IS

Mary Contrary said...

@Death: Those lyrics make me think of Darquesse. :3

And, I'm okay, thanks. And yourself?

wbd/msd

Jophiel said...

I'M GRAND!!!

HEH, DARQUESSE!!!

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

HELLO

Mary Contrary said...

Hiya, Jubi! :)

Near mid-night... I should be going.
*hugs*
Bye, all~

Jophiel said...

Morw... School has started... 2xMorw...

Bye!!

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

TAIA!!!!!!!!! *supermegatacklehugsofdoom*




bye :(

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

DEATH!!!!! *Supermegatacklehugsofdoom*



bye :(

Niccolò Croatoan said...

I'm doing quite well, considering. Thank you.
And how are the rest of you? Jubilance and Death?

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

COCO!!!!!! *un-dodgeablesupermegatacklehugsofdoom*





hi.

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

Niccolo....

Jophiel said...

Here for a sec!

I am uncharacteristically happy! And in maths! Bye!

Niccolò Croatoan said...

Oh, alright then, goodbye, Death.
Hello, Zafria.

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

Whats up?

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

ZAF!!!!!! *supermegatacklehugsofdoom*



hi.

Niccolò Croatoan said...

*sigh* At the moment, not all that much. How about yourself?

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

Nothing really

son of the moon said...

The ceiling, I would presume.

Unless one is outdoors, then potentially the sky. Or clouds, or tall buildings or trees, depending on the scenery.

Why do you ask?

Oh, you weren't talking to me? Mmmmrrrrrrrrr... Everyone is talking to me. Cats are the rulers of the universe.

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

KITTY!!!!! *supermegatacklehugsofdoom*

son of the moon said...

MEEEEEEEERRRRROWWWWWWWWWWW!!

*is supermegatacklehuggedofdoom*

(is that how one says it?)

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

I guess so... Everyone says it differently xP

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

Lol ugh i feel like crap idk why

son of the moon said...

*Blinks* Then my way must be right.

Elder Zafira, you have my sincerestish wishes for your good health.

And now, goodbye.

As much as I enjoy being pounced on by happy happy people, I am not as nocturnal as my namesake.

son of the moon said...

I meant "sincerest"

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

Hello Tigris....have we ever met?

Eh I'm Elder Zafira Kerias American Elder working in the main American Sanctuary to appear in LSODM

Niccolò Croatoan said...

I do hope that you feel well again soon.

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

*stares*

Niccolo you actually have feelings?!

*is in shock*

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

*Laughs*

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

Teaching mom to use the Wii is hard

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

Teaching mom to use the Wii is hard

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

xD It's hilarious when older people can't adjust to modern technology xDD

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

DINNER
bye

Niccolò Croatoan said...

Yes, believe it or not, I actually do have feelings. They just never last for very long...

JonathonMoore. said...

Don't be so damn dramatic!

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

*hugs Niccolo*

Oh Coco I feel bad for you I may be a Necromancer but I do care

Jophiel said...

*Hugs Niccolo too*
Morw... You poor thing...

Valkyrie V. - Ivy said...

IT'S MY BIRTHDAY GUYS


I IS A FOURTEEN YEAR OLD NOW


I HAVE TO FIGHT THE FACELESS ONES

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

YAY VAL!!!!!!!! *superspecialmegabirthdaytacklehugofdoom*

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAAYYY!!!! :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD *give super birthday cake of happiness and confetti and joy*

*Runs around throwing confetti all over the place*

Valkyrie V. - Ivy said...

Thaaaaaaanks :D

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

Feliz cumplanos a ti! Feliz cumpleanosa ti! Feliz cumpleanos a Val! Feliz cumpleanos a ti!

Jophiel said...

Happy birthday Val!!!

Niccolò Croatoan said...

Oh, happy Birthday, Valkyrie!

Apologies for my sudden absence.

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

Oh. Coco

*sighs

Niccolò Croatoan said...

What is the sigh for?

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

Nothing Coco

*hugs*

I gotta go now! Night dont kill me in my sleep

Niccolò Croatoan said...

*laughs lightly* No promises. Goodnight.

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

Hello??

Jophiel said...

*Hugs Niccolo*
Aw, it's okay. Don't kill Zaffy. Be happy!
(Not here)

Niccolò Croatoan said...

I'm here. Though I do not understand why everyone keeps hugging me..

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

Well I'm not gonna hug you


if it makes you feel better...

but if it DOES make you feel better, then I probably WOULD hug you so you DON'T feel better.


but then that would be mean. And I don't wanna be mean...


*Frowns* I'm confusing myself....

Jophiel said...

*Hugs again*
Because hugging crazy people is my occupation!

Rosalind Turner said...

Wait, whoa. That is quite the synopsis.

I'm scared to read the book now, but I'll probably read it anyway because I just HAVE to know what happens!!!

Niccolò Croatoan said...

That is certainly a unique occupation.

Rosalind Turner said...

And what's this about Finbar dying? I don't get it...

YOU PEOPLE BETTER BE WRONG

Jophiel said...

Thank you Mr. Crazy! My friend who I just claimed a truce with got me in Indonesian Packman...

Jophiel said...

And this idiot just got the teacher out...

Jophiel said...

And now the person who told Andrew to get me is being a hypocrite...

Damn you Cassidy!

Rosalind Turner said...

Oh, sorry! Wasn't trying to pop randomly into your conversation. Carry on!

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

Yeah.. I don't really understand the whole Finbar Dies thing either....

Jophiel said...

Cassidy is a girl in my class... Not you... Sorry... She just was being mean...

Finbar dying was some crap that someone found that said there was a secret message encoded in the synopsis...

Jophiel said...

https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/-8hCLcb8vzQ4/UXnpbH7YjRI/AAAAAAAAAQc/sgpd4RyzE0M/w422-h313/2013-04-25

Jophiel said...

MY TEACHER JUST CALLED A GUY IN MY CLASS HOT!!

(Not here...)

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

0.0 well that's... .awkward


xDD

Rosalind Turner said...

Jubilance: I agree, it still doesn't make sense.

Death (Rose): I didnt mean you, just the random conversation in general. Sorry, I'm really bad at typing on this thing,

The secret message thing does seem unlikely. Hopefuly it is just a rumor.

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

*nods* It probably is...

Hey Indelible, Are you new here...? I don't think I've seen you around...

Rosalind Turner said...

I can't copy that link on my phone, sorry!

That is awkward, ya.

Rosalind Turner said...

Ya, probably.

I guess so! I havent been around!

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

Oh :) Well WELCOME TO BLOGLAND! *holds out arms in the "Behold-y" sorta way*


If you're gonna be visting often that is... xP

Rosalind Turner said...

Thanks! :)

I don't know... Maybe?

I need to finish my homework now, it's late. Nice to meet you! Bye!

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

NIce to meet you too :) BYEE

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

*Looks around*

Hello??

Niccolò Croatoan said...

I'm still here, I suppose.

Jophiel said...

Hi!!! I'm walking around the library while evil people(s) try to hug me...
*Shudder*

Jophiel said...

And I am still not safe... Dear Derek...

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

*Grins*

*Tries to hug Death*

Jophiel said...

AH! NO TOUCHY!!!
*Runs away*

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

*Chases Death*
I SHALL GET YOU!

Jophiel said...

NO YOU SHANT!!!!!!!
*Runs faster*

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

*calls Clemy*
*clemy flies in*
*Hops onto Clemy*
*Flies towards Death*

Jophiel said...

*Dives into tree*
Ow...
*Jumps up and runs into Eden's base*
Heh, anti-everything doors!!

Jophiel said...

God, gotta go..

BBS

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

BYE DEATH!!!!!!!!!!

Dante Materazzi said...

Hey Jubi!

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

REN!!!!! *supermegatacklehugsofdoom*


hi.

Niccolò Croatoan said...

Ren? Well. Fancy seeing you here.

Dante Materazzi said...

Niccolo... I swear I've seen you before....

I'm Jubilance Glee / Occasional Haiku-er / And a dinosaur said...

I'm not really here....

Dante Materazzi said...

I already said hi to you Jubi so I'm not going to say anything more

Niccolò Croatoan said...

*sighs* I'm afraid you have... So terribly, terribly sorry, but you have.

Dante Materazzi said...

I'm afraid I don't remember... Would you care to-

That's it! I saved you when you died! At... That clinic in Des Monies!

Niccolò Croatoan said...

Yes. And then I killed you. Speaking of which- how have you been getting on?

Dante Materazzi said...

No... You didn't...

And I've been fine... Other than being inn Death's body...

Dante Materazzi said...

*in

Niccolò Croatoan said...

How exactly do you mean that I didn't? And how did you end up in her body?

Dante Materazzi said...

I was murdered by a back alley killer who must have been a sorcerer.

Um... She committed suicide and then was kidnapped (while she was a soul) by a Necromancer. I know enough about souls and bodies to know that her body would have died without a soul

Dante Materazzi said...

I'm just that great!

Niccolò Croatoan said...

I'm certain you are- but the aforementioned killer... I sincerely regret to inform you that that was, in fact, me. Didn't you know? You called me Bob, and Death informed me that Bob Hitler was the name she made up for me.

Dante Materazzi said...

*Stops*
*Looks up slowly*
Excuse me...?

Dante Materazzi said...

Hello Thrust...
*Keeps eyes on Niccolo*

Niccolò Croatoan said...

And I'm sure by now you've realized you have no more magical power. That is all because of me. I stole your name- well, most of it, anyway.

Niccolò Croatoan said...

Hello, Thrust. Apologies for the current tension...

Dante Materazzi said...

God, I hope that Death knew that I don't actually power... I told her that I did... As a joke and I think she might have taken it a bit too... Y'know... Really...

Dante Materazzi said...

So... You killed me?

NOM Ominous said...

Not the tensions I'm use to, I'll admit.

Niccolò Croatoan said...

Yes, I did.
Apologies again, Thrust. It is rather awkward to run into two characters whose plotlines coincided one too many times...

Dante Materazzi said...

Thank you Niccolo, thank you.
*Smiles*

Dante Materazzi said...

By you killing me, you saved my life. Thank you so much Niccolo.

Anonymous said...
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Anonymous said...
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Dante Materazzi said...

Hello... Uh... Duck?

Duck said...

YES! Hi, hello Ren, you new?never seen you before, I'm Duck the awesome and supremely powerful but most people call me Duck or Random.

Dynasty Maguire/Rathrockt Maguire (Brad Wood) said...

Duck could you pass this message on to Fabi: I am really sorry and I'm alright with not joining MC! I've joined Dead Reaping! And I will continue to read MC! I am Sorry!

Duck said...

Rehearsal:

Hey Fabi!
Brad Wood told me to tell you this: I am really sorry and I'm alright with not joining MC! I've joined Dead Reaping! And I will continue to read MC! I am Sorry!

-Brad Wood

Dynasty Maguire/Rathrockt Maguire (Brad Wood) said...

Yes! Thanks Duck! Many Thanks
*Hands a Brad sticker*

Dante Materazzi said...

Hello Brad....

Um... Why do they call you Duck?

Duck said...

Ooooh, yay, limited edition Brad sticker!

Dante Materazzi said...

And yes, I am new. This is the second time I've been on. Death has been begging me...

Stupid crazy idiot...

Dynasty Maguire/Rathrockt Maguire (Brad Wood) said...

HI Ren you knew here? Not saying you are. Its just I've never saw you!

*Shakes hand*

Duck said...

I call myself Duck because ducks are awesome

so so awesome.

Dante Materazzi said...

*Shakes hand*
Hello, yes, I am new. Your stupid friend (guess who) actually held a gun against my head until I made an account...

Ducks are not as awesome as wolves. Because wolves are awesome

Dynasty Maguire/Rathrockt Maguire (Brad Wood) said...

What Death Rose? or duck Tassap?

Duck said...

ARE YOU AN AUSSIE?????????

Dante Materazzi said...

Death Rose held a gun against my head... Though it was a water gun and I had just straightened my hair...

Dante Materazzi said...

Originally. I came from the same area as Death. She didn't know, obviously...
*Shakes head at the memory of the screaming girl*
And now I just travel. Fun. With a straightener and a wink for the ladies.

Duck said...

Have to go to rugby training now.

BYE!?!?!?!?!?!

Dragona Pine said...

Hello.







I've made a... I think you call them colabs, or something? Like a joint story?
Meh, I've made one. And it'd be great if people would join.
The blog address is:

deadreaping.blogspot.co.uk

So far it has four members including myself. There's Rose Black, Emerald Melody and Brad, and me.

If you're interested, leave a comment with your email and when we have a suitable amount of members (Maybe 6-8), depending how popular it becomes, then we'll start sorting out a storyline and begin writing.

Dynasty Maguire/Rathrockt Maguire (Brad Wood) said...

Blogland is quiet...

Dragona Pine said...

Just the link one more time before I have to go:


deadreaping.blogspot.co.uk




Now I have to go to school. Bye!

Dynasty Maguire/Rathrockt Maguire (Brad Wood) said...

Yes Dragona thank you!

Dante Materazzi said...

Blogland is quiet. Is that what you call it? Blogland?

Dynasty Maguire/Rathrockt Maguire (Brad Wood) said...

yeah thats what we call it

Dante Materazzi said...

Blogland... I would have done Blogville but, you all seem happy with it so I wont burst your bubble...

Dragona Pine said...

Hello. I'm ill'll so I have a day off school, it seems... So I can be on.

Dragona Pine said...

*Ill

Dante Materazzi said...

Hello Dragona

Dragona Pine said...

Hey Ren! How are you?

Dante Materazzi said...

Me? I'd be better if I was in my own body...

How are you?

Dragona Pine said...

I'm fine, though ill thanks. Do you write stories?

Dragona Pine said...

Cheese

Dragona Pine said...

Mwhahahahahaha the cheese returns!

Dante Materazzi said...

Not really, I never found the knack of it. Death does. About me. Sometimes. She's annoying...

How about you, do you write stories?

Dante Materazzi said...

Cheese?

Dragona Pine said...

I do write stories. And as for cheese

Dragona Pine said...

Cheese is just something random I say. I asked whether you write stories because I'm making like a joint one.

Dragona Pine said...

And sorry I poofed.

Dante Materazzi said...

No problem, I did too, actually.

Ah, the joint story sounds interesting! I'll read it!

Dragona Pine said...

I posted the link on the other page. It hasn't even started yet though. ^^

Dragona Pine said...

Lol. We British trust Google more than God. XD

Calidae Dark said...

Hey, Cali here.

Quick question, does anyone know what personal information you need to include along with your entry for the Exquisite Corpse Comp!!?

I decided id enter after all :P better late than never.

Dragona Pine said...

Yay! I've just added a quote to the blog.

Dragona Pine said...

Hey Cali! How are you? And I'm sorry, I don't know.

Calidae Dark said...

Hello all who are online :)

Have we mey, Dragona??

Dragona Pine said...

I don't believe so. I'm Dragona *gives cookie* I'm a ninja, video gamer, minion and general randomer.

Calidae Dark said...

Calidae Dark, or Cal, Cali, Dark, Dae, call me whatever, and am Grand Mage of New Zealand :)

* hands back a Valsnack * Omnomnom cookies.

Dragona Pine said...

Nice to meet you. *studies valsnack carefully, realising he doesn't have a clue what they are* *eats it*

Calidae Dark said...

Nooooobody knows what Valsnacks are. Thats what makes them fun!!

Calidae Dark said...

sorry, I know I just arrived, but I have to go. Life calls! Bye!!

Dragona Pine said...

I have two blogs. *nods proudly* one for me (fanfic etc) and then a joint story I started last night. ^^

Dragona Pine said...

Bye CAli!

Dragona Pine said...

I'm off. Bye!



deadreaping.blogspot.co.uk

Duck said...

HI?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Dragona Pine said...

Duck, could you look at the link I posted?

Dragona Pine said...

Sorry, have toto go again.

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

Coco scares me

Duck said...

I said hi then had to leave for dinner.
But everything's good now......probably

JonathonMoore. said...

I just learned about the comp and wrote a short short story for it and just sent it.

Duck said...

Good going Jono!

You might win because you're not up against me

JonathonMoore. said...

Ha! Learnt about it an hour ago but... I dunno, it's eleven O'clock over here. I;m tired. I don't think it'll win but who knows? Certainly no sensitives I know.

Duck said...

You wrote a short story in an hour! I'm impressed.

JonathonMoore. said...

Oh, don't be, seriously. Its not long. If it wins, then be impressed but I doubt it. Anyway, wanna spar?

Duck said...

Spar? No idea what the hell it is but I want in

(although I do believe sparing is something like boxing or fighting)

JonathonMoore. said...

Sweet. (Darkness erupts from my body, it surrounds your vision. It clears and you stand in an arena made of smoke. I draw my sword, a wicked blade of black metal.) Your move.

JonathonMoore. said...

Hmmmm... You there man?

JonathonMoore. said...

Black fire engulf my arms. I shoot two concetrated streams toward you

JonathonMoore. said...

"WAIT!" (I snap my fingers, two steps from hell's track SKYWORLD starts to play) "Continue."

Duck said...

I push the air to my right and narrowly dodge the dark flames then I throw both fire balls in my hands directly at you.

JonathonMoore. said...

I roll, and cut at your shoulder, kicking out with my right leg

Duck said...

The kick connects and I fall to the ground but swiftly use the air to quickly get back on my feet and give myself a couple of metres before taking out my pistol. I aim directly in-between your eyes. That's when I pull the trigger.

JonathonMoore. said...

I wall of darkness (My spelling of this word is AWEFUL) materialises in front of the bullet, I swipe at your leg

Duck said...

(Because you materialised in front of the bullet you would now be dead but I do believe you meant behind the bullet and in front of me).

Shocked that you have appeared right in front of me, I didn't notice the sword swipe until it was too late. The sword cut straight through the bone and everything. I give out a terrible cry that turns into a grunt as I do the only thing I could think of in that time and with that much pain, I smash tour face with the butt of my gun.

JonathonMoore. said...

woops, I ment that the wall of darkness met the bullet. Never mind. I sheath my sword after yelling in pain and remove a jar from my pocket. In the jar is a foul smelling gel. I heal your wound in less than a minute. I help you to your feet.

JonathonMoore. said...

You win.

Duck said...

Surprised by the sudden kindness, I gladly take your hand as you help me to my feet (or foot). I know that something is wrong but I still have makers.

"Um... well thank you for that, much appreciated after it was you who cut my bloody leg of!"

Duck said...

Oh, I win

NICE!

Duck said...

makers=manners

JonathonMoore. said...

We were SPARRING. I wasn't trying to kill you. Or i'd be dead. And I healed your leg. Go ahead, streatch it out.

Duck said...

This is a great leg. What was that stuff, miraculous it was. Dr Nye might really want some, or Scrapegrace (when he was a zombie that is)

JonathonMoore. said...

Ah.. its not important. Just... blood of a faceless one.

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