Monday, September 17, 2012

Wow

Now then... THAT was a tour.

And it's all over. I've been home for a few days in between, but the fact is this tour has been going on since August 5th, and it ended September 15th. Last night I was walking around my garden, looking up at the stars, and the thought hit me: it's over. It's done.

Sure, sure, I have other things to do. I have an interview tomorrow, and signings and events in Bray, Ennis, Bangor, Belfast, Dublin and Cheltenham to come over the next few months, but essentially, that's me done for the year.

It's been a good tour. No, it's been a great tour. I got to meet so many of my Minions, both from Blogland and Facebook and the Forums and even Bebo, for God's sake. And then I got to meet so many more, those of you who don't even post comments. And then I got to meet those Minions who don't even know I have a Blog, or that there are Forums and Facebooks and Tumblrs and whatnot out there.

Already, some of you are being talked about in the corridors of Harper Collins. The tall blonde with the T-shirt in London. The hot chick in Australia, who asked me to marry her and assured me her girlfriend wouldn't mind. The readers who gaped, who froze, who hopped and skipped, who babbled and blubbered. The readers who proposed and flirted and flattered. The readers who came in costume, the readers who came with gifts... the artwork on display, the stories, the effort and dedication and the sheer talent. The massive four hour signing session in Liverpool 1, the even more massive five hour session in Bluewater...

And then all the bro-fists and the hugs and the tears from the hyperventilating teenage girls. The parents and guardians who stood in line so patiently, and who were so good-humoured. I hope you Minions thanked them for driving/escorting/waiting with you- they thoroughly deserve a hug.

It was exhausting. It was manic. It was fun. I wasn't able to take all the gifts with me on the plane, so they're being shipped over and I should have them in a few days. Once they are in my possession, I shall post some photos. Some of this stuff is astonishing.

So thank you, everyone who came out to see me and get a book signed. For some of you, it was our first time meeting. For others, we've met before. Others still, you've come to see me practically every single tour. I remember a lot of you. I know some of your names. And I love seeing you again.

And I'd love to say that now I'm going to take a holiday- but really, what are the chances of that? I've got stuff to do, and things to write, and sometime over the next month or so I'm going to have to start Skulduggery Pleasant Book 8...

4,884 comments:

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Anonymous said...

What's wrong?

Jophiel said...

Thank you,

*Walks to a stage with a microphone*

Welcome, welcome. Today is a new day, a new day for life, death -no pun inteanded- and magic.

Anonymous said...

Erm. Skip the formalities.

Jophiel said...

I am quite unwell today, I just threw up.

Anonymous said...

Ew. Are you ok?

*backs away so as not to get pikes on*

Anonymous said...

*puked

Jophiel said...

Okay... Well, in short, I would just like you to be a witness to the opening of Australia's new Sanctuary!

It is invisible, yes but wipe away the dirt from your eyes, focus beyond the horison and you will see it. I, Death Rose will no become Grand Magess, of the ACOE!

Jophiel said...

Yeah, okayish...

Anonymous said...

ACOE?


You need Elders.

Jophiel said...

And it is 'Magess' because Mage sounds so masculine!

Anonymous said...

Australian Council Of Elders. I get it now.

Jophiel said...

Australian Council of Elder, I'll go see if Hellboy and Nix want to join!

Anonymous said...

I thought it was a typo. Well, Mage is short for Magician, so what is the feminine of magician?

Anonymous said...

Nix is Australian?

Jophiel said...

Yeah, he lives in Melbourne!

The feminine for magician would be witch

Anonymous said...

Feminine of WIZARD is witch. I just Googled it, and it seemed that Magess actually is correct.

Jophiel said...

Yay!

Jophiel said...

Kes, I feel like fighting

Anonymous said...

Here, fight this.

*sets lizard mutt from HG on her*

Jophiel said...

Yes!

*Starts fighting lizard mutt* *Laugh*

Anonymous said...

Have you read HG?

Jophiel said...

*Gets arm bitten off* *Screams*

Jophiel said...

Last year, before it became kool

Anonymous said...

*laughs*

Katnisssssssss.....

Anonymous said...

I read it in 2010 I think. So you know what a lizard mutt is.

Jophiel said...

Yes, they eat Finnicks for breakfast

Jophiel said...

*Mutt grabs leg and rips it off* *Screams*

Anonymous said...

Lol.

Katnisssssssss....


You read 1984?

Anonymous said...

Fine. I'll save you. *stabs lizard mutt with katana*

Jophiel said...

No,
*Screams loudly as possible when Mutt rips my finger off*

Anonymous said...

I just killed the mutt. Gosh.

Jophiel said...

Thanks, I had it...

*Looks at bleeding body*

I wonder what Eden's going to think. . .

Anonymous said...

*brings Death to Nye.*

Doctor, this idiot said she wNted to fight something and a lizard mutt appeared, so can you heal her?

Yes? Thanks.

Jophiel said...

Have you read Tiger's Curse?

Jophiel said...

*Frowns*

I'm sorry Dr. Nye, this is the fourth time I've seen you in 24hours, I know... What?! Next time you see me you're going to dissect me to find my soul?

Anonymous said...

Yes I have.

Nye! That is completely against protocol!

Anonymous said...

I gtg, brb.

Anonymous said...

Ok, I'm back.

Jophiel said...

Bye, and why are you leaving me with Nye alone? It's like leaving Kelsey alone with Lokesh!

Sparky Braginski said...

Very sort of half here.

Anonymous said...

?

I said I was back. Besides, youre nit alone. Clarabelle is there, remember?

Anonymous said...

SPARKY!!

*hugs Sparky*

Sparky Braginski said...

Hey... Kes...

Jophiel said...

http://memecrunch.com/meme/4TQ8/team-kishan-team-ren/image.png

But I know, I've read Tiger's Destiny

Jophiel said...

*Squels*

There ain't Clarabelle! It's her day off! And hi Sparky!

*Tackle hugs him to the ground*

Anonymous said...

Sorry, it was a long time ago and I've only read the first one. I shall reread it tomorrow I guess.

Sparky Braginski said...

...HIM?

Anonymous said...

Oh that's true Death. I didn't even think of that...

In Blogland it's TUESDAY though.

Jophiel said...

Kool, okay and what do you mean 'HIM'?

Sparky Braginski said...

*scowls*

I'm a GIRL.

GIRL. FEMALE.

THIS SHOULDN'T BE HAPPENING ANYMORE.

Anonymous said...

Lol.

BAD DEATH!

Jophiel said...

Sorry, auto correct on the iPod

Sparky Braginski said...

...Yes, right, sure.

*sits in tree and sulks*

Jophiel said...

*Glares at Kes* *Waits for screams*

Jophiel said...

It is auto correct, I promise!

Sparky Braginski said...

Does anyone know what kind of hat Skulduggery has...?

Anonymous said...

*crosses swords which are immune to magic in front of her*

Your glares are futile.

Jophiel said...

Private eye

Anonymous said...

Sparky, a fedora I think.

Sparky Braginski said...

*scowls at Death*

I don't believe you.

Mostly because I don't trust you.

*narrows eyes*

Mostly because you demolished my treehouse.

Twice.

Sparky Braginski said...

Not a fedora...

Jophiel said...

WHAT?!

*Shimmers above Kes and whacks her with a tree branch*

Anonymous said...

True, not a fedora. He has a whole ROOM of hats, remember?

*cuts branch in half*

Grande Mage Zafira would not be happy if you killed her Administrator.

Jophiel said...

I didn't destroy it? I was thrown into it and the other time???
I am Grande Magess of the Australian Sanctuary! You cannot say that without prof!

Jophiel said...

I'm grande Magess, I can do what I want!

Sparky Braginski said...

You are what?

Death, you can't self proclaim yourself that.

It's rude.

Jophiel said...

Magess, Mage is too masculine.

And I built the Sanctuary, and Guild didn't get voted in

Anonymous said...

I am Administrator to a far older Sanctuary.

Sparky Braginski said...

*snarls*

Death, I recommend you stop talking...

Please, please stop talking...

Anonymous said...

Sparky, she built an Australian Sanctuary because apparently there wasn't one.

Jophiel said...

So, this is a modern sanctuary, I can send Demon Fire after you! He is my brother and body guard

Jophiel said...

Fine, I'll type instead

Sparky Braginski said...

Death, there's already an Australian Sanctuary...

IN FACT, Zath, Nix, Eve, a few others and I spent quite a while deciding where it would be.

Anonymous said...

I'm Administrator and possibly Head of Security. I have permission to use lethal force.

Jophiel said...

Whatever, it will be a Victorian Sanctuary

Jophiel said...

So does my brother, the story about Crystal Darkflair that I put on here a while ago was true!

Anonymous said...

Oh well then.

*blows up Death's Sanctuary*

Hahahaha now I outrank you!

Sparky Braginski said...

*pinches bridge of nose*

There aren't separate Sanctuaries for different...

*sighs*

*retreats to my treehouse*

Jophiel said...

*Stares in shock* *Turns around and dissapears out of Blogland*

Anonymous said...

Bye Death!

Sparky, I'm not sure if this Is true, but aren't there 2 American Sanctuaries? One on the East Coast and one on the West Coast?

Sparky Braginski said...

There's no information on how many Sanctuaries there are...

Anonymous said...

Ok. Thanks. I just know that a few people have told me that, and that Grande Mage Kerias recently appointed me as Administrator for the East Coast one.

Sparky Braginski said...

There is an American Sanctuary, but any information about it is completely fan-made.

Anonymous said...

That's what I meant. I realize there is probably only one on the SP universe, and that Strom is Grande Mage. I meant the fanmade Sanctuaries.

Sparky Braginski said...

Ah well, I try and avoid those, simply because it's really hard to keep track of them all.

I tend to keep the Aussie one below the Chifley Tower, in Sydney...

That carpark has given me nightmares.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, I have no clue what you just said. msd, I'm falling asleep.

Sparky Braginski said...

Kk.

Gotta go anyway.

Bye!

Anonymous said...

Bye!

Sparky Braginski said...

I. AM. BACK!

Jophiel said...

I am partially here, I am making my Sanctuary on minecraft

Sparky Braginski said...

*shrugs and climbs into my treehouse*

*walks around*

Where'd the...

Found it.

*runs into room with stereo speakers lining the walls*

My music room!

*puts UltraNUMB on so loud that the walls of the treehouse shake, making sawdust drift to the ground*

Jophiel said...

Nice! Turn it up!

Sparky Braginski said...

*is drinking coke and listening to the music, therefore not able to hear Death Rose*

Jophiel said...

*Bangs on tree house door*

TURN IT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bethany said...

can't even think about book eight. the penultimate book.

nope, not thinking about it.

can't wait to see some of the stuff you got. and hot australians are always a good thing.

Sparky Braginski said...

*is head-banging*

*song ends*

*scowl slowly forms on face*

Death, stop hitting Chester.

Jophiel said...

Hi Bethany!

I am Death Rose! A sum up of me... Phsycopathic

Jophiel said...

Turn the song up and I will!!!!

Jophiel said...

I am making a Temple in Victoria, it is going to be under Luna Park!

Sparky Braginski said...

Death...

I need to go.

Jophiel said...

See ya Sparky! Who is a girl! See! I know! It is auto correct!

Jophiel said...

Eww! I am listening to some Scoby Doo show and then their are Fred and Daphne kissing!

Jophiel said...

The Gaol is so hard to do!

Eve the ROCK said...

What??? Why can't the Sanctuary be in Adelaide? It can be under the old girl's bathroom at my school, everyone's too scared to go in there, only me and my friendlings have, and I scared the c*** out of them by turning the light off :P

Jophiel said...

Lol, I'm in Vic, and it is more of a temple

Eve the ROCK said...

What's more of a temple?

Jophiel said...

The sanctuary

Eve the ROCK said...

Why is the sanctuary a temple...??

Jophiel said...

It is supposed to be a sanctuary but it looks like a Necromancer temple

Eve the ROCK said...

Why....?

Jophiel said...

Because it is black, underground and spooky

Sparky Braginski said...

Helllllo?

Jophiel said...

Hey Miss Sparky

Sparky Braginski said...

Hello, Rose...

Jophiel said...

Nice pic... I wanna punch something!

NOT THE LIZARD MUTT!

Sparky Braginski said...

Do you know what my picture is of?

Jophiel said...

No, but hell is it freaky!

Sparky Braginski said...

*frowns*

It's a Winter Hunter from the video game L4D...

Jophiel said...

Okay, I am starting a war, do you want to be on my side, or your own?

Sparky Braginski said...

...Why are you starting a war? Where? Who against? Why would you want to?

Jophiel said...

Because I am bored. Here. Against my reflection. And yet again, because I am bored.

Sparky Braginski said...

*scowls*

Don't have a war.

Have a fight with yourself.

And, anyway, you'll win, it's not like you're reflection can do anything to you.

Sparky Braginski said...

What's really more fun is summoning a small army of Hollow Men.

*pulls out Makhaira*

Like so.

*points behind her at Hollow Men, about thirty in total*

*runs past rose, into the thick of them and starts slashing open their papery bodies*

Jophiel said...

It can, it was studying with China Sorrows and now it has magic and it has more symbols than China herself!

Jophiel said...

Yeah!

*Starts blowing them up with my glaring*

Sparky Braginski said...

*pauses, moving away from the gas*

Reflections can't have magic.

Not even Val's has magic.

Jophiel said...

Will you excuse me for a sec? I need to talk to Hansard Cray!

Jophiel said...

Mine does, China was doing experiments on it!

Sparky Braginski said...

It's Kray...

Sparky Braginski said...

China doesn't have the power to give things magic, not even Ancients wield that much power.

Jophiel said...

"Hello?"
"Hansard, how are you?"
"Fine... Can I help you?"
"Uh... I need a few indestructible Hollow Men"
"May I ask why?"
"Of course silly! I always have these urges to kill something or start a war, I was thinking that I might be able to infuse them with magic..."
"Okay. . . How many?"
"Hmmm... How about 300?"
"Okay, that will be $600, 000."
"Done! Thank you!"
"Bye!"
"Ser ya later! Also, I want express delivery! I'll pay extra!"
"Okay, then that is $650,000."
"Okay, bye!"

*Hangs up*

Anonymous said...

Yes skulduggery pleasant book 8 !!!!!

Jophiel said...

You'd be surprised at what some symbols can do!

Jophiel said...

Hello Miss Sorrows! It seems that we were just talking about you!

Sparky Braginski said...

There are no symbols giving things power.

No one possesses that power.

Only Faceless Ones.

And people don't consort with them and live.

Stop bending the rules.

Jophiel said...

*Shrugs*

China, tell her about your symbols! They can give magic, can't they?

Sparky Braginski said...

*scowls*

No, no they can't!

Jophiel said...

They can! Reflection, ATTACK!

Jophiel said...

*Glares evily at Sparky* *Moves hand and blue light shoots out if it and blasts Sparky in the chest*

Sparky Braginski said...

*walks into my treehouse*

*reflection can't enter treehouse*

That was easily solved.

Jophiel said...

*Grabs ax and starts chopping down the tree Chester was built into* *Grins*

Sparky Braginski said...

*leans over balcony and looks down at Rose*

I'm not going to fight you.

I don't fight God-Modders, because I don't like losing.

I was one, once, and then I decided to be more realistic.

I still think I stretch the reaches of my powers too much, but I really don't want to give up my favourite move.

Jophiel said...

*Half way through the tree* *Starts chopping faster*

Sparky Braginski said...

Chester cannot be cut down with an axe.

You can't do anything to Chester.

*jumps down and slams fist into the ground, throwing her off her feet and away from poor Chester*

Some people just want to watch the world burn.

Jophiel said...

*Laughs and gets back up* *Sends Sparky blue energy knives that pierce anything*

Sparky Braginski said...

*weaves through them and slaps her*

Stop for a second and answer me this, what did I ever do to you?

Jophiel said...

*Laughs*

What did you do to her? You falsely accused her of hurting Chester twice and hit Grabde Magess a few times too!

Sparky Braginski said...

*screams with frustration*

Grow up! Grow up and get over yourself!

Heard the term 'forgive and forget'?

Live by it!

I started a WAR in this place because I got so emotionally involved!

Well, I say started, which I didn't, but I certainly fuelled it.

Because I took every little thing to heart.

Get a grip.

Jophiel said...

That is why I'm a reflection, I like starting wars, I use anything I can against people, it's my thing!

Sparky Braginski said...

No, you're a reflection, you don't have any emotion!

NONE.

STOP. BREAKING. THE. RULES!

Jophiel said...

I know I am a reflection, I think I feel emotion, she feels them, but I don't think I said anything about emotion...

Sparky Braginski said...

To want to do something, emotion is required.

Jophiel said...

No, you need determination, that is not a emotion

Unknown said...

Got a picture with you Derek. I look weird... Oh well. As long as i have it!!! I have got artemis fowl and gone but i haven't even read them yet!!! Whoops too busy reading SP!

Jophiel said...

Hi Jenifer!

Sparky Braginski said...

Determination is an emotion.

Most things are.

In fact, I have reason to believe that rational thought requires emotion.

Ever wondered why reflections don't band together and kill all humans?

They lack drive.

Because, above all else, where would they get the drive from?

Jophiel said...

The owners! They have the past thoughts of their owners! I bet if a lot of owners wanted to kill humans, the reflection would go kill them too!

Sparky Braginski said...

Yes, you're talking nonsense now.

Helena Ember Sky said...

That post made me so sad. *literally cries*

Zathract Mist said...

Relfections do not have emotions, Valkyrie's aside.

There is a reason for Valkyrie's being an exception.

There is no way to break these rules set out.

There are no symbols to give magic. There are usually no cannon characters mentioned in any Character OC/Bio, so China is also out of that equation.

I'm sick of God Modders and the people who automatically class themselves higher for no reason that can be justified properly.

The Australian Sanctuary has been discussed thoroughly. It's location is usually different according to who is writing about it.

There has only been one Grand Mage mentioned in any Bloglandian-Related Fan-Fiction, and that happens to be Sparky Braginski in Lynxia's 'One For You, Two For Me'.

Rawr.

Sparky Braginski said...

*smiles brightly*

Why, hello Zath...

How long have you been watching?

Zathract Mist said...

I missed the play of UltraNUMB...Damn it.

Sparky Braginski said...

I'll play it again, if you want.

Zathract Mist said...

Hello, Sparky. *returns the smile*

I hadn't been watching.

Just quickly skimmed through the comments when I got here is all.

Sparky Braginski said...

Good on ya, either way, Sarge.

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Zathract Mist said...

If you like. Doesn't really matter.

Sparky Braginski said...

Alrighty.

I'm glad I showed you that song.

Unknown said...

going to school now! bye !!!!

Helena Ember Sky said...

*waves arms around* I'm crying! I'll admit that I actually want pity. I am literally crying.

Zathract Mist said...

So am I, actually.

Bye, Davis.

Sparky Braginski said...

Bye Davis!

What's wrong, Hel?

Zathract Mist said...

Oh, sorry, Hel...

Helena Ember Sky said...

The POST! Up there. *points up*

Zathract Mist said...

She didn't get to meet Derek.

Jophiel said...

Okay, I don't care anymore! You think that we are God-modders! We are not, I have discovered my true name! I have power that I never knew I had! I spent time finding it out! I lost family and colleagues because of it! I never said that they had emotion! Reflections are like robots; you can command them to do anything! I am not a bloody God-modder, I am me! I have spent so many f*cking years trying to figure what my true name was and the extent of what I am capable of! My reflection has magic, it didn't come from any mirror, it came from a mirror that had do many symbols on it and had magic infused with it!

Dont try to find your true name, don't lose colleagues for nothing! That way you won't be called a f*cking God-modder all the time!

Sparky Braginski said...

*laughs*

Death, it's been done.

Zathract Mist said...

I know my True Name, and I actually have a reasonable explanation for how I did it too.

Jophiel said...

I know! Just realize that I have lost so much trying to find ultimate power and you just call me a God-modder!

Zathract Mist said...

*sighs*

Death, you've been on Blogger for two months.

Helena Ember Sky said...

Wow, so many people know their true names. I don't.

Sparky Braginski said...

Death, drop it.

You've lost.

Sparky Braginski said...

Be back soon!

Zathract Mist said...

I don't like having known my True Name, though, Hel.
Too cliche. I'd restart the entire Zathract character, but it's not really possible.

Zathract Mist said...

Bye, Sparky!

Jophiel said...

Mist, I had to kill so many people to find it, I had to destroy citys and had to verus unimaginable evil, what Val and Pleasant went up against is nothing in comparison!

Helena Ember Sky said...

See you Sparks. *is annoyed* Why does Derek have to keep reminding me that I didn't see him?

Jophiel said...

Fine! I am leaving! I'm not coming back either! And i am blocking every one's emails too!

Helena Ember Sky said...

*sighs* Check your email Death.

Zathract Mist said...

*is finding it hard not to roll eyes again*

And yet, do you actually have a reasonable way of how you discovered it?
And either way, it doesn't matter. This conversation/argument/debate was about Reflections, not True Names.

Zathract Mist said...

Boom!

Helena Ember Sky said...

But seriously, you better not block me. I'm going to need you for moral support soon.

Jophiel said...

And blocked!

Zathract Mist said...

*shakes head*

Bye Death. You'll be back before long though. It's happened to everyone.

Sparky Braginski said...

*nods from beside Zath*

It has.

Helena Ember Sky said...

Zath, stop being so unconsiderate.
Death, fine, go. I don't need you anyway.

That's my way of showing that I care and also showing that you're being annoying.

Zathract Mist said...

Welcome back.

But yes, and multiple times, as well.

Zathract Mist said...

I've tried already, Hel. I don't bother over these things for very long if I don't see a point.

Helena Ember Sky said...

Well before Death decided, I decided that I must leave also. Only to save myself some tears. I'll be back eventually. Promise. And I will keep in contact by email. See you! *waves*

Jophiel said...

I see that this is a bad time...

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