Monday, March 1, 2010

Another post, because (one of) you demanded it!


Grrrrrr.

I have been INSTRUCTED to write another blog.

Not by my agent, not by my publicists, not by my publishers- but by one of YOU. Apparently I should stop what I am doing and write another entry for this blog right this SECOND. The only problem is, I have nothing to write about.

Well, that’s not entirely true. I have plenty to write about. It’s just that I don’t want to write about them.

Shall I talk about working on my new book? I’m almost finished the first draft, if that’s what you’re after. I’ll probably throw out half of it on the rewrite, and so give myself MORE work to do, but you don’t care about my suffering, do you? You only care about the BOOKS. I could be curled up on the floor, sweating blood and wracked with pain, but as long as I have my keyboard down there with me, YOU WOULDN’T CARE.

And before anyone asks, no, I don’t know what it’s called. And before my editor asks, no, I don’t know what it’s about. I’ll know what it’s about when I’m finished, damn it. At least I hope I will. It would be rather worrying to reach the end and realize I have no idea what I’d written. Do you want to read an excerpt? Do you want to read the opening paragraphs? Do you? Are you SURE?

Well you can’t, because I am a mean and spiteful god.

So what else will I write about in this accursed blog? My cats? They hurt me so. Pooper’s not so bad- she just walks all over the keyboard until I sit back and allow her to curl up on my chest for a half an hour of intense purring and occasional bites. But Groomer... Groomer stays around my feet, and every few minutes she’ll rear up and dig her claws into my knees, because she thinks it’s cute.

My dogs have settled in quite well. Although they are so old and arthritic I’ve had to install ramps from my back door to the ground, and from the decking area to the garden. They’re not too good with STEPS, you see, but they’ll roll down those ramps with marvelous enthusiasm.

It is quite embarrassing.

I don’t have much to say about my sister’s twins, except to comment on how cute they are, how small, and that they occasionally poo their pants. When they’re older I’m going to tease them so much about that, they have no idea. Just wait ‘til the speeches at their weddings.

I’m preparing for my Hong Kong/Australia/New Zealand tour, which will kick off next week. I don’t particularly like hot countries, and I don’t particularly like airports in hot countries, but I shall be brave, and try not to complain about the fact that I get to visit all these amazing places while my friends and family get to stay home and have normal jobs like FOOLS. Dark Days is already out over there, so that I’ll have something to sign when I visit. For everywhere else (well, for readers in Ireland and the UK) it’s out in April.

Is that it? Can I stop now? I really do have an awful lot of work to get done. I know I’m a bad blogger. I KNOW. But I can’t help it. Have you READ other people’s blogs? They’re so BORING! They say the same things, over and over and over again. Isn’t it better to say NOTHING, then repeat oneself? Isn’t it?

No?

Oh.

One last thing, before I go. Your comments. It has actually become very gratifying to know that there are other people out there like me. Not as good as me, naturally. Not as brilliant, or as fantastic, or as admirable, but still- you have potential. Like those two nice American ladies who had that podcast-http://thepoweroffriendship.libsyn.com/index.php?post_id=548724 - which I LISTENED to, the whole way through, and it made me LATE for whatever it is I was planning to do that afternoon. So THANK YOU, nice American ladies, for wrecking my day.

Incidentally, my humour is IRISH, not British. Think of it like this- in their hearts, British people WANT to be Irish. They know we’re cooler, they just don’t like to admit it.

Oh, and Maddi asked two questions about writing. She asked if I told people the plot of what I’m writing before I’m finished, and the answer is, good God no. And don’t think THEY haven’t tried to make me. My editor, bless his twisted little soul, is always trying to get me to send him an outline, so that we can iron out any problems in the story before I get to them. I understand the request, but that isn’t how I work. If I plan out every little detail, I lose enthusiasm for the writing. And if someone else knows even the loosest structure of what I’m planning to do, I lose enthusiasm for the story itself.

Put simply, if I tell the story, even in an outline, then I’ve already told that story- so what’s the point of writing the book?
Not every writer is like this, by the way. Some plan it all out so that by the time they get to writing, it all flows onto the page. I’m not saying these writers are doing it wrong, but... actually yes, that is what I’m saying. Everyone should do it the way I do it, but obviously not as good.

Her second question was do I take onboard other people’s suggestions, as regards the direction of the books. And once again, the answer is good God no. I take onboard suggestions when it comes to editing- I will accept any good idea if it makes the book better, and then pretend I thought of it first. But the direction of the books is all mine. No one, not my publishers or my agent or my friends or family, knows where this series is going. And I’m not going to tell them, either.

The joy of being a writer is in the telling of the story. That’s all that matters, and that’s all we care about. I'm not going to spoil that by telling someone how the story ENDS

And that's it! Another blog over with! I shall write one more before I go on tour, and then I'll keep you up to date with the hilarious goings on while I'm over there. It will be a TOUR BLOG, full of funny things that happen to me, like getting lost, like not understanding languages, like getting on the wrong plane and actually arriving in Galway and wandering around for three weeks thinking how like Galway Hong Kong is...

51 comments:

  1. I OFFICIALLY LOVE YOU <3
    Wow, sorry to freak you out there. After 20 days of not updating you updated on my birthday. This makes you and me best friends (I don't care if you don't like it, it's the truth and you know it).
    I also am obliged to inform you that Hong Kong is made of awesomesauce. Please be aware that this is not actual sauce but instead a key component of what makes a place great.
    Till next time,
    And it better be soon,
    VK
    x
    P.S. Its still Hottie Bespoke :)

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  2. I would say something interesting in this comment, but this entry was not very interesting, so therefore, I shall say nothing interesting.

    HA.

    Though I do really love how persnickety you are about writing. Do you, just like, hole up in your study/room/place-where-you-write for hours on end?

    You're like the secret service of writing. You don't say or do anything that would give away what's *really* happening. And now I'm imagining all of your book characters are presidents/kings/royalty and it's a little weird. (I did imagine Sanguine in a dress and I was horrified for quite a while.)

    And, going along with Maddi's second question, I remember this one *person* saying how they were having a legit conversation with you on Bebo about putting *romance* (and romance = Skulduggery/Valkyrie to this person) in the books. And while at points I think that that'd be cute (don't hate me) it'd be creepy in the books. 400-year-old skeletons and...380-years-his-junior regular *non-skeleton* is just sort of creepy when it's official (like the SP fanfiction portion is either cracked out pairings, Fletcher/Valkyrie pairings, or Skulduggery/Valkyrie pairings).

    So yeah.

    But actual question: Do you ever get writer's block? I'm sure you do (that's sounds rather creepy) since I'm almost positive every writer gets it (minus those ones who just write whatever comes to their mind whether it be good or not ahemTwilightahem). You always say how you write for hours on end and such, but I just get too distracted. I have such ADD when it comes to writing. I write a few sentences, sing obnoxiously along to my music, hop on Facebook, then lose interest in what I was doing.

    Yeeah.

    Well, I shall stop rambling since this comment is just a huge jumble of me being persnickety and slightly annoying. Apologies...

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  3. Hiya. Talking to one of my favorite authors...sweet. SO SLEEP DEPRIVED! My stupid Child Development baby doesn't like it when I sleep.And I would just ignore it but then that'd kill my grade and my amazing dream of being a bestselling author would rush down the tubes. The babie's more evil than your twin neices. But you're probably not even reading this...my long period of sleeplessness caused me to become curious about this blog and thus read it...all of it. I was fairly entertained. Skulduggery Pleasant is a book of extreme awesomeness and WHAT THE HECK???? WHY DO THOSE GUYS GET THE BOOK BEFORE THE U.S.???? YOU EVIL CRUEL MAN!!! Sleep deprived.

    If my life were not already completely crazy with me always expecting Skulduggery to break down a door in my school (or burn it to the ground preferably) or the extremely indepth conversations with my friend about whether its better to be an adept or an elemental, minus the need of about eight hours of sleep. What was I even talking about?

    Anyways...your book's awesome. But just you wait till I write a bestseller and knock you off the bestseller list and then confront you one on one with my awesome ninja-samurai powers against your ninja-leprachaun powers...and BOOM!
    Oh my gosh I need sleep.
    Ignore me.

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  4. to Mr. Landy,
    Just a note to say that you misused the word "they" in this blog, which was most irritating to my poor brain, already annoyed by mindless drones overusing the letters "e" and "y" left, right and centre across the entire World Wide interweb. I also wanted to say that I very much admire your two cats, who appear to be attempting to overthrow your dictatorship in the house in favour of a communist society not dissimilar to that depicted in george orwell's "animal farm", only perhaps less smelly as a result of them not being pigs.
    I am most looking forward to reading "dark days", although I was quite displeased when hearing that other people would be able to read the book before me. In my opinion, I should be the first person to read any of your books, excepting you and of course your editor, who to my mind is nothing more than a swirl of mist, whispering suggestions into the wind that is your thought.
    Have a pleasant day, your sincerely, etc. etc.
    P.S. I definately preferred your first typeface, as it was much less irritating to my (aforementioned) inflamed brain. However, due to your admitted incompetence with computers, i shall have to "soldier on" as the phrase goes. Try not to be overrun by your cats, as then I wouldn't be ble to enjoy any moore of the famous escapades etc. Unless, of course, they are the real intellegence behind you...

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  5. I think you should add a character named Klara.
    Isn't that a great idea?

    with love/ klara

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  6. You updated. Good.
    And, of course, the English speaking countries get the book first. No one cares about this rock in the middle of the ocean (until we suddenly owed everyone heaps of cash.)
    Yeah. I'm from Iceland.
    Please don't hurt me.
    And, as if that doesn't make it worse, there is only one specialised shop in the entire country that does all those books you really ought to read, comics and so on. ONE. But I still go there so I can order your books. Don't let that fuel your ego. Don't.
    And, yeah. Go on updating this blog, cause it's probably one of the few I've found worth reading, along with one made by someones' wife because he speaks total nonsense in his sleep. But it's awesome, so I don't mind.
    And this day has been rotten, 'cause my school coach made us run three laps around the neighborhood, even though there is so much snow you can't even walk without falling over.
    I'm ranting. Sorry.
    Regards. Hatter.

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  7. Good to hear you're alive, I couldn't bear going another 20 days without your lovely lovely blog. :P

    Out of interest, when will the Skulduggery Pleasant website be updated to fit in with the devastation of Dark Days?

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  8. Dear Mr Landy.

    Finally another update in your blog, I was getting quite tired of opening a tab especially for you mind-boggling blog (and no I didn't think of that before I wrote it, but now I look at it, it's quite clever of me) and finding that it was the same blog post.

    Just a note Mr Landy, if you wouldn't mind, I would hate if you were as you said, "curled up on the floor, sweating blood and wracked with pain" as this would mean that you were either self-harming youself or someone had overtaken me in my master plans... I mean, nevermind. Also, your pain would affect your writing and the way you thought and therfore your books would be affected, maybe this would make your writtings even better, but what would I know.

    Well, I've run out of imaginitve and witty things to say so I'm going to say taa taa for now and hop on my way.

    Farwell Mr Landy, untill your next blog.

    Lynn

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  9. Boooooo.
    Why can’t Dark Days come out earlier heerree, its so depressing.
    Honestly, your books are like..a drug. A weird but wonderful drug. Hey, look on the bright side, it keeps us off the weird and not-so-wonderful drugs ;D

    I’m sorry, I have nothing further to say because my dog is eating my leg and I’m pretty sure he’s about to come to the bone soon, and we wouldn’t want that now, would we?

    Toodlypiipp

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  10. Victoria stole my phrase. Awesome sauce is my thing. I am not at all happy about this.

    Hm.

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  11. Yeah update! ^^ You know what Landy you make my day every time you write something. It doesn't even need to be about Skulduggery Pleasant (of whom is the most-undecribable-person-cause-there-are-not-enough-words-in-the-dictionary-to-decribe-him of awesomeness)

    I think it is interesting how your editor keeps on pestering you for details on what's to come. I too have a passion to write and hate when people ask me what's next though my works wil never in a million years be as good as yours.

    Can't wait for the next update. =]

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  12. Nice to hear about the tour. I simply cannot wait to (possibly) see you here in New Zealand. May I ask if you are just doing signings or having a talk about the books or something of the like? Because if I bring my SP books and you aren't signing, I will be a little bit annoyed. But I'm sure meeting a famous author/god will cancel out the disappointment of possibly not having my books signed.

    Also, I just want to mention that I am VERY exited, because it is highly possible that I will be getting Dark Days within the next few weeks. Which is awesome.

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  13. Hey
    When you say New Zealand please say you mean the South Island, PLEASE! YOU have to come to the SOUTH ISLAND! I too am pretty sleep deprived, i haveto get up at 6:30 am to get to SCHOOL. Yes all that torture on my body just to go to SCHOOL. What has school done for us lately? And i pretty annoyed with school at the moment cos they said assemblies were to be FUN! they LIED! LIED! they said we were to play games! they lied again! We played one game in the space of 5 weeks. The rest have been absolute torture and i have been trying not to fall asleep. Anyway i dont even know why i just told you all that i think i need to let out my pent up rage... Anyway time to go catch up on sleep and train my wasp army (YES wasp army dun dun dunnnn)...
    Bye for now
    Zahra
    12 soon to be 13!

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  14. If I ever do write an amazingly witty and fast paced book like yours I will be sure to release it in Ireland FIRST. Because as you may very well know Ireland happens to be the best country in the world. We have grass, we have cows, we used to have money so what else could you ask for(besides getting your book first)

    p.s. My cats, Patch and Scamp would like to congratulate your cats for their efforts and let them know that world cat domination will take place in precisely 18 days.

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  15. Huzzarh for the person who made you update, dark days out??? YAY Australians normally have to wait a month sometimes for a book :( my dads a head librarian so I get first dibs :) nothings more fun than playing hide and seek in a huge empty dark library.... Anyway this book will save me from the horrible 1984 book I have to read for school :d .... Its not really hot right now ... Well unless your in S.A it gets hot there but Sydney cool - ah ha what a lame pun not even really a pun. Anyway I'm gonna stop now TVs getting interesting

    sorry about the lack of paragraphing, think of it as a rebelian against English

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  16. Huzzah! I tell you, nothing in the 'verse will stop me from being in Sydney when your tour hits Australia. For once, Australia is not at all neglected in regards to release dates!

    Also, wonderful to hear from you again, Mister Landy. Hearing about your life is far preferable to most of the rubbish about celebrities that slips into the news.

    And of course we'd care if you were in physical pain. Just type the word (assuming your keyboard is, in fact, with you) and I'm sure some paramedic fans will be skipping over your arthiritic dogs as they rush to your rescue.

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  17. I'm coming to your launch tour in Portsmouth! And I can't wait for Dark Days. See you there!

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  18. i love your blogs, they're brillo's! your right, people do only care about your blogs, and they dont want to hear you repeat yourself. when you say april...you mean april 3rd dont you? as my birthday is the 4th and i have sent my brother out with instructions that if he does not return with your new book on my 16th birthday i will turn his room in to a walk in wardrobe! please, i will die if i am made to have a convo. with my family, instead of reading your fantastic new book. i'm as british as can be as i am both scottish and english (without the smiley welsh bit) however i wish i was irish and i plan to move there asap.
    have a good tour
    Georgia S-P

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  19. i DO wish i was Irish- but yano, i am NORTHERN Irish and that's nearly as good except without the accent and a lot more swearing, rice, and fall out boy.
    B-b-b-but the blog is AWESOME! VERY AWESOME! write more! or i'll eat you! And you don't want to be eaten by me... seriously.
    Two questions-
    Do you like Panic! at the disco (an AMAZING band)
    and
    what is yer favourite colour. It's an obvious question but NOBODY EVER ASKS IT! its RIDICULOUS!
    keep on keepin on,
    love n peas and je ne pas chavs,
    Flaring Rhythm

    P.S
    write more, Landy, write more...

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  20. Hey Hey....Just wanted 2 say i tink ur t0tali t0tali aws0m...Lol...Da c0olest evA...(^^,) Take care..

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  21. Come to Singapore! We have three terminals worth of 21 degrees Celcius Air-conditioning, all with way more glitz and all that than Heathrow. Which says something. I have no idea about your fancy Irish airports, though.

    Singapore, where the heat is blinding and the freezing air-con perpetual. Beat THAT.

    Basically, just come so we get your book first next time. And before you ask, there is a fanclub of crazily maniacal Skulduggery lovers. Do panic

    Cheers!
    Anonymous one, otherwise known as Mademise or crazy lass.

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  22. lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala

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  23. lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalav

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    ReplyDelete
  25. I have NO IDEA who this I-diddle-e-D thing says I am.... I dont understand the damn thing, but anyways, its me, Bex, Newt, the nutty screwball one of Bebo who never stops talking. And now I've forgotten... OH, yeash, I'VE READ THE FIRST PAGE OF DARK DAYS, well, one of, anyway, the one that starts with... can I sa- type it? She M-I-double S-E-D, I'm sure you know now anyway, and that one page's epicness is too epic for words, I tell ye.
    And, ahem, US BRIT'S CAN BE COOL! Like... um... WE BUILD AWESOME CARS! Lets see Skul drive round in a Delorian (Oh how I would laugh), but thats even technically British! But... yeah, I guess that IS the only cool thing about us... TANITH! She makes us look cool! But then thats thrown out the window when Fletcher comes into the scene, huh?
    Anyway, just to let you know how much I'M SUFFERING, Derek, my depression has got to the point where I've lost my apitite. Do you know how bad that is? I NEVER lose my apitite.... ever.... And my createive vibes have stopped! I havent been able to DRAW for the last week. Which isnt good because I'm being MADE to draw things... ruddy Kim, DRAW YOUR OWN SUIT! Honestly, she cant even think of a NAME for herself... This is turning out to be one BIG comment. Hey! Guess what!? My lap tops gone screwball, I'll be on the web, it'll shut down my page, somethin'll pop up and say, YOUR COMPUTER IS INFECTED, TAKE ACTION! I'll quickly restart it, do a scan and zilch, no virus... I dont understand it. Poor things never been the same since it died...
    I'm not sure if I have anything else to say... I probably do, because I never don't, but I DON'T CAAAAARE, I say I don't care what you.... I miss Fall Out Boy...
    I need those tour dates for the UK! Wanna know if your coming to East Anglia... Well, Suffolk would be nice, but I can deal with Norfolk. Cant blame you if you DONT come here... its horrible... Norwich is nice, though... if you like city's... I guess...
    OK, I'ma stop torturing you now, toraaa.

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  26. G'day from Australia!
    Apart from the other strange comments (MYNAMEISLOUIS.. wth?) I just want to say somet things... Coming from a 16-yr-old girl's point of view (whom became extremely obsessed with the series after her little brother kept asking her and asking her to read it but she kept putting it off) I am quite excited about you coming to Australia. You said you dont like hot countries, well good news - summer just finished, so by the time you get here itll be Autumn. Whether thatll matter or not, I am not too sure. Weather is seriously unpredictable here.
    Anyway, I heard Dark Days was coming out in April, and almost killed over and died when I saw it sitting proudly on a shelf along with about 15 other copies around the 3rd of March. How exciting it is for us to get something before everyone else! We are usually among the last.
    Anyway, I am about halfway through already. Yes, I should be further, but Ive had other priorities, believe it or not. I just found out that this guy in my class is just about as obsessed as I am with Skulduggery Pleasant, and for a year 11, that is uncommon. So how exciting it was to share it with someone other than my brother!
    You are most probably sick of hearing this, but I have a question about the movie... and beware, it may be a dumb one. Is the movie going to be completely animated? I would like it to be real people but an animated Skulduggery. But more importantly, will it have all irish accents (except for Tanith, of course)? Me and my brother are wondering.
    Hope you actually read this! :D Good luck with the book... counting down the days till September ;)

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  27. Yo Mr Landy!
    I'm so excited.. i just can't hide it! Your coming to Australia!
    Anyway... your last book is... SHOCKING!
    I was so shocked, when i finished it i ran around my room shrieking. Like a witch or a goul or my grandma.

    And i gave it to my friends who read it and ran around their rooms shrieking. Or so they claimed to.

    So there.
    I'm hoping to see you in Melbourne.
    Cheers till then.

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  28. Wow Lizzie I totally agree with you!!!Why doesn't it come out in the U.S.A. first????By the way Mr. Landy sir you definitely stole my thing!!"Grrrrr" I was just about to say that when I realized you said it and......wow I love you.....yeah....Anyway getting back to my type of normal conversation...I would really seriously care if you were curled up on the floor sweating blood and wracked with pain!I (for one!) worry about your health!I mean sure I'd seriously die if you stopped writing your books/blog but I would die a slow, horrible, painful, agonizing, death if you were sweating blood and wracked with pain!As I said before I (for one!) care about your health and happiness!I mean really!I TRIED to stop posting for you....I failed....but at least I (yet again for one lol!) TRIED!
    ...SO anyway moving on I'm a big cat fan and my cat with such a brilliant imaginative name-Blu is much sweeter.I mean yes she certainly would walk all over your keyboard if she liked you but most likely as long as you petted her once and a while would not dig her claws into your flesh....except when she felt like getting a ride around you house on you shoulder....So I better go now...By the way have you heard of Gaiaonline.com??You seriously need to join it in your free time and send Skyril a message(Skyril is me...don't ask how I came up with that name...).^.^
    Oh and Mr. Landy sir you do the same for me as you do for Carina. ^.^ You make my day every time I read a new one of your blogs.

    So it's time I shut up my virtual mouth and visited Gaiaonline.com to....do stuff....Bye-bye...
    P.S. Your really really really really really need to visit The United States.Especially Louisiana.If you did I would most likely stand there staring at you with my mouth agape...lol but at least you would know your absolutely admired! ^.^ Bye-bye yet again

    Charity

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  29. DL

    I'm pretty sure that by constantly demanding people worship you that some impressionable people have decided to do just that. Congratulations on creating your own religion. Does that make Skullduggery a disciple?

    Any way.

    Here's to hoping that not too many people get converted when you visit Australia, or I may have to do something drastic. Like buy your books in secret over the internet so people don't know that I read them.

    P.S. I have been considering posting the link to your blog somewhere really public just to see what your reaction would be. I think it would be interesting.

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  30. Dear almighty one,
    I have now officially read Dark Days twice and I only took so long because I was in Queensland for vaulting training and after many death threats and pointing guns in my face and all that jazz, I finally had to put the book down. I know, it was stupid, and I tried to slip into my room as much as I could and when they tried to coax me out I distracted them with funny little lines like : But this is the best part! or I will never leave Derek Landy's ingenious remarks! But to no avail; they brought out the machete then and I said "WELL FINE, VALKYRIE'S ONLY JUST BEING ATTACKED BY HOLLOW MEN!!"

    Just a question (yes, I know you get so many, my league)where are you going on your tour to Australia? If you are only going to Sydney, stuff them and their stairs and their water features and their RAIN and come to Adelaide. I will force everyone to come to you at knife point. Even the police.

    Always your willing servant until death,
    Jessica Beattie (who will name her kid Valkyrie Cain or Skulduggery for you when she has one)

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  31. HI! i love your dogs haha sorry i've never meet them but knowing that i'm not the only ... eh living creature that trips over their own feet is reasuring ... kinda. any hoo, APRIL that's only; emm a sertain amount of days away! WOO! ha an x with magic marker on the back of the evil one's head that's brilliant! i have evil cousins, i mean rally evil, one of them triped me over and started beating with a banana; i haven't eaten a banana since, dremt about them though horrible dreams, nightmares! my other cousin randomly told me nobody in my family loved me and called me four eyes. but to get her back i put my glasses on the back of my head and told them i was always watching them, their every move and that i was accualy a figment of their imagination ... but their only six so they didn't know what figment ment. haha still funny though.
    wait if you have only just finished your first draft then way is the book already out in some countries and why is it not out in ireland first? seen as we are obiously superior to any other country

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  32. I would like to take a moment to laugh at all the non-Australians who have not yet read the epicness that is book 4.

    Now to glare at his worshipfullness and ask why he decided to give the most epic character in the series such a small role in book 4.

    Book 5 better feature him prominently.
    >.>

    --
    The Wafflite,
    Scheming Megalomaniac,
    Sadistic Dreadlord,

    Valk

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  33. Hey!! Its Matex!
    Not like that means anything to anyone.
    Least of all Derek, who gets so many comments that i wonder if, sadly, he doesnt read them all.
    Certainly i started but gave up after a while realsing Id hardly got anywhwere.
    IM FROM AU!!
    ISNT IT AWSUM!?
    Well, yeah it kind of sucks for those of you who arnt, I have to agree that everyone should get the books at one time (And disagree that other places should have got it first, that would make you just as bad)
    i LOVE skulduggery pleasant.
    And derek landy
    Hehe cant wait to see you in melbourne!!
    And i cant wait for the movie either, though im not sure whether it will be a good thing or a bad thing. You cant really please everyone.
    Blablabla. I could talk for hours.
    I also wonder about writters block.
    Ive had it for ages and never really got past it, just moved onto doing other things.
    Me and my friend love SP.
    I still remember looking for your site, a few years after getting the first book(and reading it many times), and finding out that there was a sequel!!!
    I was litteraly running around the house screaming and yelling and WOOO!!!!!!!!!!
    LIKE JUMPING UP AND DOWN SCREAMING RUNNING AROUND ANDALALAL WOOO!
    And now its a SERIES? OMFG.
    I would like to ask then, was it always planned like that?
    Because i always had thought at the end of the first book it was sort of one of those cliffhanger endings, where she starts learning magic, and it hints that they went on to have lots of adventures blabla the end.
    I didnt think there would be another book,
    so when did you decide to make it a series??
    Also i know you HATE the blog but i LOL AT IT!
    Its one of the most entertaining things i find myself doing, reading your blog. Sorry about that.

    From Matt/Matex/Matthew/SPfanatic
    See you in melbourne :D
    (omg that was a long comment sorry about that aswell)

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  34. Well i would hate to add another comment to the bunch already there and waste your time but im procrastinating homework so unfortunately you will have to suffer.

    I live in Australia and i was expecting the book to come out in April. Then i was at the shop chatting to a fellow Skulduggery Pleasant fan and we stumbled apon dark days. Easily the best surprise of my life so far probably. I read dark days in a single after noon and i am sooooo reading it again, like all the other ones.

    I decided to spend the last month telling all my friends that if they don't read it i might have to murder them. So far my copy of the first one is making its way around my class and my copy of the second one is close behind.

    Honestly i think it is absolutely awesome that Australia gets something first. You have probably heard this a thousand times but your work is such an inspiration. They are the only books that make me laugh out loud in a weird tone that makes people stare and laugh at me. Have you ever laughed while trying to be absolutely silent? Sounds pretty funny.

    Any way i wish the small town of Port Macquarie was visited by awesome authors. The only authors that have come here for book signings that i know of are John Marsden. Which doesn't count because he is australian. And boring.

    I can't wait till september, and i can't wait till the movie. But i am going to have to so obviously i can. I am capable of waiting. What a dumb phrase. "I can't wait" what a silly thing to say. Well i guess i should stop the procrastination.

    Thanks for being Awesome

    Rach

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  35. My question was waay more worthy than hers:

    "I would have never picked you as a spiderman fan as far as comics go? Surely you'd be more into some Sin City? Watchmen? What about movie wise? A Clockwork Orange, predict I.

    You've influenced me in saying Bah, Humbug! More than anything else. Oh and could you please give your thoughts on that horrid console known as the 360 wherein you can not play the mighty metal gear solid."

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  36. i just wrote you a long comment but then for some reason, maybe a bug in the computer or a gremlin of some king chewing the cables all my sayings have gone...:(
    it definiate wasn't my fault. im great at computer...hmmm...
    have a great tour and its great how you've bonded to your nieces. Soon, you would teach them black belt and make them killing machines by the time they are 8...better watch out Valkyrie!! :)
    soooo excited for Dark Days!! :D

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  37. I got the book march 2nd and read it in a night and a half! i'm in Australia so yeah! :)

    I wanna go to Sydney for the tour but I don't think I'll make it I'm soo sad! but a magazine I have is holding a competition to win SP merch like a a lifesize standee and bag! YAY!

    But whatevvs I wanna ask you some questions!!

    "Are you excited about the Kick-Ass movie? (i know i am) and "What do you think of Guillermo del Toro?" he is my favourite director!

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  38. Holy guacamole you listed to our podcast! Thank you so much! Sorry for making you late, but if it's any consolation, my head just exploded from happiness upon seeing your reply.

    Thank you for the link as well!

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  39. I’ve just finished reading Dark Days, and I’m glad you’ve finally got something that’s starting to look like an underlying storyline. Frankly, I was getting a bit worried after The Faceless Ones, because I was thinking “How is he going to write more books when all these events are relatively unrelated, apart from them happening to the same characters? I mean, what kind of author is he?” But I’m relieved now that you’ve got one brick down to start the building.

    I hate Fletcher, by the way. Just thought you should know that. I’m not too fond of Valkyrie either… Or Tanith. I was actually really disappointed at Tanith’s so called “near death experience” in Dark Days. I mean, it was more of just a painful experience… I do like the vampire guy though, I forget his name (I’m horrible with names) and Shudder, I like how he’s coming across as a powerful, but tortured soul. It makes you respect him, but also pity him.

    I don’t really understand the whole “Valkyrie is special” thing. I mean, isn’t it a little overused? The main character being the MOST important character? When I write a story, my main character is not going to be the most important person in the world. Actually, in case you’re interested (you’re not, but I’m going to tell you anyway) I’m writing about Nero’s first wife, Octavia. She was a pretty interesting character, but at least the fate of the world didn’t rely on her.

    Oh, and by the way, Pooper is a silly name for a cat. Well, I have one called Pooh Cat, but I didn’t name her, and she’s named after Pooh Bear. I mean, for an author, I would have thought you’d have come up with a more interesting name. You might want to look at Ancient Roman mythology. They have really good names. At least, I think so. By the way, maybe consider nicknaming the evil baby as Chaos, or something like that. That is a little fear-provoking. They say all things are born out of Chaos.

    Speaking of names, the name for you’re new book. Most of you’re story names have reflected the content… sort of. I didn’t really understand Dark Days. I mean, this is just the foreshadowing to the Dark Days, or something like that. Honestly, I would have called it “Skulduggery Comes Back (or gets rescued, rather) And The Evil Guys Steal A Bomb, Only To Have Their Plans Foiled Again. Oh, And Valkyrie Has Special Blood”

    Well, maybe that’s a little wordy, but then you wouldn’t even have to read the book to know what’s happening. But that’s probably not good for your books. Everyone would pick up the book, read the title, and then know what is going to happen, so they wouldn’t buy it. But it would save me a lot of money. (It actually wouldn’t, because I don’t buy the books. My friend does, and then loans them to me when he’s done.)

    One more thing… was it me who called you arrogant? I honestly can’t remember. If it wasn’t me, I fully agree with whoever said it. Oh, and Irish are known very much for their humour. I mean, all Irish men are stupid, right? Just joking, that’s a stereotype. But haven’t you ever heard Patty jokes? Like: “Patty was caught red handed stealing yellow paint.” Or my personal favourite: “Patty comes home from his wife’s funeral, and while unlocking the door, a shingle from his roof slips off and lands squarely on his head. In astonishment and confusion, he looks up into the sky and says ‘Margie? You up there already?’” You probably didn’t understand that one.

    Surprisingly, I still remember that one. I was 7 when I read these jokes (there was a very long novel composed of Patty jokes) and I still remember 3 of them. I won’t tell you the third because I don’t quite remember the punch line. It wasn’t funny, so I don’t know why I remember it.

    I like Skulduggery and Wreath and Ghastly. I love it how Scapegrace gets a minion that’s even more pathetic than him. I actually picture Scapegrace in a lame superhero costume with his underpants outside of his outfit. I now refer to him as “the guy with the underpants.” This is even more amusing to imagine when he is a zombie.

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  40. By the way, I hope you appreciate how much I had to take out to actually get my comment to publish, including the ending paragraph, and a whole lot of witty comments. And just when I had it down to to character limitation, I realised it included spaces as characters too. So I lost another 3 paragraphs.

    And then when it when to publish, it had an error, so it took me another 5 minutes to work out how to publish it again. I am very annoyed!

    This is very serious. I'll have my people call your people at set up the court date. Mr. Landy, you've just been served.

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  41. Oh, and I am very curious about Valkyrie's reflection's secrets... It's obvious that it's purposely hiding thing from Valkyrie. I actually think it's becoming less of a reflection and more of an individual, because of it's overuse. I mean, Valkyrie has changed, but has her reflection changed to reflect that? Has it stayed the same as she originally was? Has it developed on it's own, becoming it's own sort of person? I am VERY curious!

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  42. It's funny (for me) that every day since the day this blog entry came to be has a comment for it. Until my comment. And I've ruined it! >) I feel accomplished.

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  43. Since Ol' skullduggery is coming back in april, do you think you can post a bit of a preview/sample on this blog? It'd be cool.
    Lol, Avtica. Even i'm posting a comment a day afterXD

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  44. THAT WAS ME WHO SAID TO YOU ON BEBO!!!

    xD

    COOLIO!

    I feel so proud of myself now, you've made my day...even though this was posted ages ago.
    (:

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  45. I'm very much like you Mr. Landy. I cannot tell a soul about the stories I work on or I lose interest in them. I am so glad to know that there is someone like me in that way. However, as cool as you are you are not a god... you are a leprechaun ninja author! Anything else would just be unfair...

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  46. Hey, I have an idea. Waddabout if the reflection pushes Valkyrie into the mirror and goes out solving mysteries with Skulduggery instead?
    Just a suggestion.

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  47. Yes i would rather be irish!

    Two if my three favourite authors are irish! And one of them's you!

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  48. This blog post has been documented, recorded, and filed into the Blogland Archive on December 8, 2014.

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  49. Can you PLEASE explain to my English teacher that you don't have to plan out EVERY LITTLE THING?

    ReplyDelete