Ladies and gentlemen...
When I start writing Book 9, I had a title in mind. And it was a good title. It was a glorious title. It echoed a phrase we'd already seen in the books themselves, and it was cool, and haunting, and awesome...
But for some reason, it wasn't a "Final Book" title.
I don't know why. Some titles suit the last book of a series. Some suit the first. This title — my lovely, glorious title — suited the first.
I'm not going to tell you what it was, because I do plan to use it at some stage — and I never let a good idea go to waste.
But suddenly I had a problem. I needed a new title.
I needed a new title that sounded like a final book. I needed a new title that fit alongside Kingdom of the Wicked and Last Stand of Dead Men. I needed something almost... poetic.
And so I came up with this.
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Can we just change the topic?
Iguana: I have to Liverpool with it. It gets complex annoying.
Dragona....I'm choking from laughter
*Luciana *live *very
Don't except me to be back on for a while, lucky if I'm back my 16th.
Great memories where always here. Why do I have to leave with them so sour?
Zaf, this happens every time I'm on my mobile ponies. It drives me insane.
...oh my... this is hilarious.
Dragona you ought to change autocorrect to ff
I'm pretty sure my characters make me more confident, because they force me to write things that I wouldn't normally be confident saying/doing/writing, and so therefore I am more used to it when I come to a situation as myself.
. . .
Well.
Crap. D: Why can't I be influenced by NICE people?
Hunter: *looks hurt* We are nice.
Ez: . . . No, we're really not.
Hunter: Shut up. Yes we are. We're very nice.
Ez: . . . Sure we are.
Hunter: We ARE. *glares*
Me: Um.
No.
Hunter: Well, you're just to pathetic to see it.
Ez: That argument's getting old, Hunter . . . :P
Hunter: Only in human terms, and their lives are so short they're always about to die anyway.
It's sad, really. Maybe if Star lived longer she'd learn to be less pathetic . . . *looks at Star* If I gave you eternal life, would you use it wisely?
Ez: HEY.
Back away from the eternal life promises.
Hunter: Well, hypothetically. *looks at Star expectantly*
Me: . . . Maybe?
Hunter: *sighs* Rubbish.
Never mind, then. See your grave in a few years.
Ez: And you expect Star to say you're nice.
Hunter: :( I'm nice to non-pathetic people.
Star: That's discrimination against pathetic people.
Hunter: PATHETIC PEOPLE DESERVE TO BE DISCRIMINATED AGAINST.
Star: NO ONE DESERVES TO BE DISCRIMINATED AGAINST.
Ez: Well, that's not exactly -
Hunter: *cuts her off* (Ez: *rolls eyes and turns back to whatever she was doing*)/I/ know that, but does that stop people discriminating against me? No, it does not. You live in a discriminative world, Star. Deal with it.
Star: Well, we can CHANGE the world -
Hunter: Been there, done that.
Star: You haven't made it less discriminative.
Hunter: God, I'm not a miracle worker. Do it yourself.
Star: But I don't live long enough.
Hunter: Well, that's your fault for being to pathetic for me to grant you eternal life.
SO. THERE.
Me: . . .
*gives up*
#ChaseForBookNine
Please phone just give me one comment without screwing with what I say. :(
Yay! There it is! Now it gets to screw with everything else you say.
MY AUTOCORRECT IS OFFOFF. It's this stupid blotches textbox which makes it "correct" whether its on or off. I have no idea why but I can't see it until I read my own women.
hello.
*dies* mobile ponies
...*laughs*
Urgghhh stupid prolapse.
I'm sorry, Death . . . :( *hugs*
Fours . . .
#ChaseForBookNine
You seriously need to do something with that phone!
I'm just going to hi dieting somewhere. Preferably somewhere without teachers.
...your phone gave you that one comment and now it hates you again.
Please stop, Dragona, you're killing the English language.
This is just... Please just let me type what I type and not decide "oh hey yes this makes the sentence soso much better". IT DOESN'T. It makes it bloody raccoon.
...raccoon?
Raccoon Randolph taco taxi rack rocket pocket Rannoch ranked Rannoch random.
Well, on the bright side, at least your spelling is okay. :D
... Now it types Mass Effect penis? What's happening? Rannoch is the Quarian homeworld... I didn't actually mean to send that.
PLANETS NOT PENIS
Keelah Se'Lai, Dragona Pine nar Rannoch
Gtg, I think . . . :(
Well, it's too dark to do word art with my light out, so I may as well go to sleep and wake up again tomorrow.
Yeah.
OSMOSIS WEDDING TOMORROW GUYS
DON'T FORGET
*leaves*
#ChaseForBookNine
Tia: someone else who understands Khelish! :D
I wish they'd show more ofof the Quarian Langhorne.
Bye Star!
Osteoporosis wedding? Cool.
*language
Good night Osmosis!
*hugs Star and Dragona and Zaf*
I'm just going toto sinkhole into the backdoor, now. My sentences are horrendous.
In fact, I'm going to leapfrog. Bye guys! Giorgio this is readable!
...Bye.
Bye Dragona!
*hugs Amy*
Hello Tia. How are you?
I am average :/ reading book 4.
And how are you doing?
I'm fine.
Waiiitttt I think I've fixed it.
Testing testing testing testing. I hope this sentence makes perfect sense because its a test to see if my autocorrect is still making me talk gibberish.
YES!
I force stopped my keyboard now it seems to be working.
Gotta go now. Bye!
Good job, Dragona! And I couldn't understand your other sentence when you left the first time...
Bye Amethyst!
I'm so happy. :D
I was supposed to say "I'm just going to sink into the background now" and "I'm going to leave" and "hopefully this is readable"
I felt a disturbance in the force, As if, a million voices all cried out in terror, and were suddenly silenced.
*great disturbance in the force
It was the voice of autocorrect as I shot it a hundred times in the face with an automatic shotgun.
Now I can actually talk I'm so happy. :D
And everyone being sad that it's crazy antics were over.
I'm going to go now anyway since I'm tired and yeah. Night!
http://orderofthebasilisk.blogspot.co.uk/
Good night!
*epic drum solo*
Hia
No one? Oh
I made a blogspot account just to post on here. Are you happy? I hope you are.
We are all very pleased.
I have two questions, if you are still here, who are you, and is that a platypus?
I am Drackomancer (other names are Drachenmant and Drackonomicon), but my real name is Heather. It is not a platypus but it is in fact an alligator head. His name is Gomez. :)
Oh, okay. Well, I'm Trip, as you've already found out. Have we met? I think we've met, but I can't be sure...
We might have! Do you go on Tumblr at all? :)
Not at all. I'm assuming that's where you know people from?
Yup! There are Skulduggery fans a-plenty there. Most recently they have been trying to make a Skulduggery Nyan Cat. We all agreed unanimously that it must be a thing.
It does sound cool. Still, this is where it's really at. The oldest site is fosho the best. *nods*
Awesome name. Cant wait to find out other title.
*POWERFUL MOTOR*
*I rise, cackling, from a revolving platform in the floor*
As the lady manager of the Midnight Hotel, I hereby advise you,
*points at you*
coem to the wedding tomorrow! It will be lovely, except for all the murder, so please, no hurtful comments during the event.
Thank you, and . . .
Goodnight!
*vanishes into the floor again*
Well, bye Anni.
Boom?
*appears suddenly into Blogland*
Hello, people. Dragona's autocorrect is hilarious. XD
*vanishes suddenly from Blogland*
*appears suddenly into Blogland*
Hello, people. I just wanted to copy off Emerald.
XD
*vanishes suddenly from Blogland*
http://anamelessattempttoestablishsomeorder.blogspot.com/
*Just popping in to say that there is definitely a new and exciting Nameless chapter up, and it will definitely be confusing for you all, but that's okay, because you have to actually think to put the pieces together.
*nods**
Aw, thanks, Duck. I feel honored. ;)
Hello.
I am eating chocolate. Yes, I know easter is tomorrow, but I am eating chocolate now because my uncle just gave me my easter stuff from him and it is.... well, its quite a lot of chocolate
I alos look like a hippy. X3
Thats totally ok though :P
Adra's Nameless chapter. O_O
Whoa.
Wbd/msd.
Hm... No one?
Okay.
I'll be distantly here for twenty minutes or so, and if no one shows up by then, I'll probably go sleep.
Excuse me I need to go A. Hit someone. B. Vomit.
And I'll think of C. I just read her Nameless chapter and I think I'll be hitting someone very soon.
Oh dear...
Well, I'm sorry to hear that.
I should have guessed she'd be trying to get friendly with Alastair. That's not shipable that's plain wrong.
Hi Snow. I'm trying hard not to go scream in pure anger. Thank god Ari can't be around here...ooh the chapter pissed me off oooh yes. I try so damn hard- and she can...
...
You know just a few months ago, you were shipping them?
(Though I must admit I'm not sure if you genuinely meant it or were simply trying to annoy Adra, but still. It's rather ironic.)
I am sorry, however, that you dislike this.
Hi Snow!
She doesn't deserve it.
Very well, then. I have no wish to further discuss this bitterness.
Let's change the subject to something that makes you happy.
How are your gerbils doing?
How dare she do that. I find it most insulting I tried for months or well a while and she can just simply do that? That pissed me off. She shouldn't have written that. Its disgusting and totally and utterly doesn't deserve the 'ship'. I rather ship my gerbil Snowball with Alastair. But her? Its sick. Its wrong, it needs to end.
Oh the gerbils were bad today. Well before I went to 'bed'. Coco bit my mom. I mean all day they were just like crazy Coco was off the walls he was just insane. He likes to go through my sleeve like a tunnel and we tried to get Snowball to do it but Snowball couldn't get back out. We seriously think Snowball is special ed, like really. To be honest we don't think he knows how to squeak. Like you pick Coco up he'll squeak, Snowball never. Snowball just s like slow...he rocks too. Sits in his gerbil ball rocking
I have to clean that cage tomorrow. They really manage to stink it up, I mean its cleaned every Saturday! The gerbil wheel gets cleaned 2 or 3 times a week. It just doesnt make sense. They pee on it. And they don't slep in the house they have, they made a nest on the opposite side of the cage and sleep there, the house i thought was warmer but apparently a nest is.
Well, I, sorry to hear that. Perhaps he was having a bad day.
They sound cute, though. Except for the biting part.
Yeah, I guess that's the downside of having pets.
I've heard a number of stories of animals preferring to sleep in locations other than those their humans had intended for them. I suppose we naturally expect animals to exhibit some of the more subtle human behaviors, like living in houses, though their brains aren't necessarily wired to do that.
I hear them now, they're on their wheel. I put a tube in the cage earlier so they were chewing it. I think Coco is on the wheel, Snowball goes on but Coco just runs like mad. They tried to run together on the wheel and Coco ended up flying into the nest. I felt bad.
I really don't know that much about gerbils. O_O
So they like to chew on things? I guess that makes sense, actually, though it never really occurred to me.
Yeah, running together on the wheel probably wouldn't work that well. At least he had a reasonably soft landing, though.
They are cute! I have so many pictures of them. And Coco never bit before so I think he just was mad. Snowball is the biter. And the weird thing about the house is they slept there until my birthday because I remember the water bottle fell a few times. The water is on a cage wall near the food and the house is there too. The water fell off because it wasn't sticking and it fell right in front of their house so I think they finally abandoned ship
Well, that would make sense. A house is less house-y when it's wet.
And yeah, I've seen the pictures on your Twitter, or some of them. I don't check Twitter very much...
But yeah.
I mostly post on Facebook but you'd have to add my given name.
They are just soooooo cute I love them
I think I ought to go to bed
I don't have a Facebook, but if I get one, I'll keep that in mind.
They are adorable, though! :-)
Okay.
Goodnight, Zaf.
I keep poofing xc
Hello?
Hi?
Msd, sorry to anybody who's on.
Osmosis's wedding today ^.^
*smiles brightly*
My room is ice cold and I can't feel my feet or hands.
*silent scream* help mee
Morrrning :)
even though it's technically not morning here anymore :/
HELLO
Okay, so my sister is my brother's servant and I am my sister's servant. We're being paid £50 to do it for fifty days, although I have a feeling we're just going to get a piece of paper with the words '£50' on it for our trouble, so I don't even know why I'm going along with this, but anyway, my sister ordered me to tidy my bedroom so now I'm tidying it.
I don't even know anymore. :P I spend my whole life doing what both existent and non-existent people tell me to do, it seems.
Anyway.
Yeah.
Wbd.
#ChaseForBookNine
I put everything into piles and pushed them to the side of my room.
I suppose that's good enough. :P
My floor's clear, at least.
Anyway.
*sits back down and tries to regain some sense of control over my life*
#ChaseForBookNine
Sorry I disappeared - was sorting things out :)
Oh Star :P
Though...that is a good idea, maybe I could make my sister be my slave (she's older, but TECHNICALITIES) :P
@Flora: Both my siblings are younger than me. XD
I'm the most pathetic, though, or at least that's what Hunter says, so it makes sense I'm at the bottom of the social pile. XD
#ChaseForBookNine
brb, lunch. D:
#ChaseForBookNine
I am less cold. On a side note, I have a 375 gram easter egg. My uncle went a little overboard, me thinks. It's huge. But it has popping candy in it. c:
I'm so sorry I keep missing Flora. *Hugs Flora* I miss you! Email me sometime so we can get back to our collab :)
ADRA! I'm here! Kinda distant because I'm writing, but I'm here!
Yes, we must get back to our collab! I've got essays and an exam, but I'm free after May 19th from some proper heavy writing sessions :)
for* not from
@Snow: YAY! :)
Back! :)
. . . Did I say I was disappearing? O_O
Never mind, anyway. :)
Msd.
#ChaseForBookNine
Oh, what time was the wedding again? was it 4?
@Chi: It's three pm, Eastern American time.
Which makes it eight pm, English time. :)
#ChaseForBookNine
My timezone
Around lunchtime for me, which means I may actually be able to attend.
Or not, if lunch is late, which it is on the weekend rather a lot.
Omg the people next door are LOUD. They decided to have freakin construction trucks plow through their land to fill in a hole they dug an entire month over the summer. Do you know how annoying it is? Windows are closed in my house and I can hear it
Our house is on a hill, so sound carries funny, so you can usually hear construction work from all the way on the main road.
I imagine it'd be worse next door, though.
The good thing about the machines, though, is that they should get things done quickly.
I'm weddy for the wedding!
[Pops up from nowhere]
[Pokes Twip]
Boom
[pokes Zaffy]
EEEP
HELLO. :)
#ChaseForBookNine
Hello.
MADE A NEW BLOG POST
http://inkystarrywordart.blogspot.co.uk/
#ChaseForBookNine
*appears briefly*
I'll be here for the wedding! Very briefly! Yes! *vanishes*
I'm sad. I wanna get my permit today but the evil DMV is closed. I will get that permit before the summer. I want to get it so I can drive around a bit. I can get it I just need the DMV open. I know I can do it! I hope maybe Monday if not I'll try next Saturday.
HAHA ONE IS
But i dont have time today blergh
@Kes: Yay! :)
@Zaf: :( *hugs*
At least, you know, there's ages before summer. :) You have Time. Well, some of it.
#ChaseForBookNine
I might be at the wedding today, but I have another Nameless to write up, as well as write up other things and DRAW and homework and other errands, so I might not and- sorry Annika!
I'm back.
When/where is the wedding?
...Hello?
...Hello?
Hello. ^^
How are you?:)
I'm fine, thanks. How are you?
I'm gooooooooood!
I'm on google hangout with some friends so wbd!:)
Ok. ^^
Do you know anything about the wedding?
Only that it will be in a chapel by the river that courses through the tender green fields of Blogland and around ten minutes before 3:00 I will be on and role-playing a few pre-wedding scenes before Photo stands by the guestbook and allows guests to arrive at 3:00 as he personally greets each of them.
*vanishes*
Precocious: So it'll be here?
Ok now I'm confused what time I should come on.
I'm guessing 8 or 9?
(*pops out of nowhere*
*slaps Dragona twice across the face, once each way*
Focus, man, focus!
3:00 Eastern Standard Time, right here, in this comment thread.
*vanishes for good*)
I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT EASTERN STANDARD TIME IS.
*goes to google it in GMT*
I have no idea either, Dragona! D:
Ok, it'll be 8.
Hellooooooo? :)
Hello Flora. How are you?
Brb.
This wedding is soooo omg i can't.'
why
:P
*is here*
HEY FLORA
ADRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA *attacklehugs*
Hello, Lu *hugs*
I HAVE MISSED YOUUUUUUU
I've missed you as well, darling. I don't come on here at all, really, but we should skype again sometime with maybe Sparks and Zath
It's been so long. D:
I'd been informed. >-<
Can't even talk to you on facebook:(
OH MY GOD YES
I should be here....yeah I'll be here on mu phone but here
Ah, I can fix that.
MY NEW ADMIN ARE SO QUIET ;-;
Are they??? :s
Yeah, we're on a hangout and everyone's being so quiet apart from Matex and Holly, hahaha.
The Aussie and the American are the loud ones~
Sorry I disappeared!
I'm good thanks Dragona, you?
ADRAAAA
LUCEEEE
*sighs* yeah the admins
FLora! *hugs* :)
Eheheh admins
OH MY GOD MATEX SAYS GHASTLY AND FABULOUS REALLY FUNNY I LOVE AUSSIES OMG
Whatever. This is lovely. I may as well leave
Have you ever heard how Em pronounces the word "cup", Lu? It's fabulous
EM PRONOUNCES CUP FUNNY?
OH MY GOD HAVE YOU HEARD FLAME READING SHAKESPEARE?!
BACK!
My mum said that maybe we could watch The Walking Dead tonight and I was just like NO. I AM BOOKED AT EIGHT. I AM SORRY, I HAVE BEEN LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS FOR MONTHS. I AM GOING TO BE THERE.
:P
ONLY ABOUT TEN MINUTES OHMYGSOH! *screams*
#ChaseForBookNine
No, but I love Flame :) He's precious.
FlamexGepard forever
And I'm back.
...
Hello.
I'll be attending the wedding in character as Effie, but I thought I'd say hi as me first.
SO EXCITED
URGH
Hunter wants me to change my profile picture to his black 'duvet' aka random rectangle but idk, it's my profile, y'know? :P
I think he's mostly stopped being in a mood with me though. :P
#ChaseForBookNine
HELLO STAAAAAAAAAAAR!
oHMYGOD FLAME READING SHAKESPEARE IS THE BEST <3 I love that guy:')
WHY FLAME AND GEP?
Hi Lantern! :)
#ChaseForBookNine
——— Shortly BEFORE the guests begin to arrive, it is late afternoon, and somber orange light glows across Blogland. On the outskirts of town, a blue river flows through a green field. It loops, snake-like, through the hills, and by its side, at the end of a little path, is a beautiful white chapel, consisting of a wide banquet hall that doubles as the sanctuary, and various halls leading to side rooms. A gray station wagon pulls up outside. ———
Photo Q. Finish: *exits the car*
*straightens his custom suit*
*and enters the chapel without saying a word*
Garrote Armitage: *exits the car*
*scowls at Photo’s back*
*his suit matches Photo’s*
*right down to the chartreuse tie*
Photo: *glances back*
You coming?
Gary: Yeah . . .
*removes a big brown paper bag from the trunk*
*follows Photo into the chapel*
Photo: *hangs coat in coat room*
We only have a few final things to set up. Fortunate, too, as the guests will be arriving in just a handful of minutes . . .
*checks his watch*
*it’s plain and black, rather than his usual one*
*the pink, diamond-studded one*
Hi Star.
You should keep it, Star :)
And we used to skype a lot, Lu, adn Gep and Flame would, like, flirt with each other or yeah and it was beautiful.
Hi Mushroom! :)
*EXCITMENT*
When an excitable person like me actually has something valid to be excited about . . . *laughs*
#ChaseForBookNine
Hi Zaf! :)
@Adra: Yeah. Maybe just as a statement to inform Hunter that I am the boss of me. :P
Hunter says then no wonder my brain is in such a state, it having such a crap boss. *laughs*
#ChaseForBookNine
bUT FLAME IS MY HUSBAND ADRAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
I don't mind tbh. Shipping it. ;P
DO I HAVE TO DED?! D;
Guess what Star? I'm being ignored by eveyone but you
Hunter, quit being mean to Star, or I'll unfriend you!
Meanie.
Yeah, well.... PEOPLE CAN LOVE TWO PEOPLE :P
But flep
Watching, Annika! :)
YEAHHHHHHHHHHHH HUNTER AND EZ'LL PROBABLY PORTAL THERE.
Not INSIDE there, though. That would be rude. They do have some concept of standards. :P
#ChaseForBookNine
Zaf, I wasn't ignoring you. You just didn't speak to me and I didn't bother saying anything in case you were offended by what I said last night. >-<
Gary: *sets heavy bag on nearby table*
Wow . . .
Photo: Magnificent, eh?
*flicks invisible speck of dust off his shoulder*
*smiles proudly*
———The main room looks amazing. The walls are hung with white bunting, pinned with white and purple flowers. A diamond chandelier hangs from the ceiling, and below it, dozens of round tables are set up, with chairs clustered around them. The tables are set with silverware, purple-accented china plates, and elaborate floral centerpieces. The entire room is spotlessly clean, and flawlessly symmetrical. Caterers can be heard, busily cooking in the kitchen. The room doubles as the sanctuary, and the alter is at the front of the room, the idea being that the chairs will be arranged into rows for the ceremony, then returned to the tables for the after-ceremony dinner. Runes and sigils glitter in the stained-glass windows, and protective charms coat the chapel; no one’s getting in who isn’t wanted.———
Gary: Wow.
Photo: I know, right?
Gary: This place looks even better than I expected it to.
Photo: It’s perfect. Eh?
*glances at Gary*
Are you alright?
Gary: . . . Yeah.
Photo: What?
Gary: *nods to the tables*
*every single one of them draped with a chartreuse tablecloth*
Photo: *claps an arm around Gary’s shoulders*
We done good, Gary, my man, we done good.
Zaf, Lu, please don't start anything- Annika has been waiting for a while for this, and it wouldn't be nice to ruin it for her :/ yano?
@Zaf: Oh . . . :(
I don't think Mushroom is ignoring you.
@Adra: Hunter looks rather panicked at that. He's telling Ez they should kidnap me and be mean to me in private.
Or he says that MAYBE, I can stop telling everyone everything he does, because apparently it's an invasion of privacy.
#ChaseForBookNine
I'm not starting anything. I'm just saying I wasn't being ignorant, I was being cautious. >-<
ANNIKA.
Hi!
Okay, I'm going to switch to Effie now.
If I was offended I'd have cursed you by now Luce
Gary: *peels Photo’s arm off his shoulder*
Photo, I’ve been meaning to talk to you.
Photo: Fine, but make it quick, and bring the bag. We have to put these in the bride’s dressing room.
Gary: *lifts the bag*
What’s in here, anyway?
Photo: A few extra accessories for the bride, and some wedding presents dropped off at the League yesterday.
*walks down a nearby hall*
*to the dressing room*
*one of the presents lies at the bottom of the bag*
*the stick of lipstick, alive with cursed energy*
Gary: *follows*
Listen, Photo, everyone at the League has been really worried about you.
Photo: Really?
Gary: Come on, Photo, the beige suits? The station wagon? I know we teased you mercilessly, but to be honest, we all loved your giant Barbie Dream-Car. It was adorable.
Photo: Gary, you’re not going to get back on my case, are you? I’m fine. Quite recovered, in fact.
*smiles*
*he’s not wearing make-up*
*and it’s very unnerving*
Don’t worry about me. I’m over it.
Gary: But . . . but Oz and I appreciated you the way you were before. You were like our sassy gay sidekick.
Photo: *takes the bag from his hand*
*plunks it onto the plush stool in the dressing room*
Please, let’s not talk about this anymore, okay? This is the boss’s day, not mine.
Gary: Right . . . yeah, of course.
*nods*
. . . We should be out there. The guests will be arriving shortly.
Need to disappear now, sorry! Might make a brief appearence later :)
I know, Lu :) I was just making that clear :) *hugs*
Hunter, you shouldn't be mean to Star AT ALL. :/
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