My Twitter-wife Holly Smale has brought to the attention of her Twitter-followers, of which I am one, this here magazine article entitled "I Hate Strong Female Characters" — http://www.newstatesman.com/culture/2013/08/i-hate-strong-female-characters — and I have to say I agree with it wholeheartedly.
For those of you too time-constricted/lazy to read it, it basically holds up a hand in the classroom and has the temerity to ask "Why are vibrant female characters called strong?" Why are they limited to such a thing? More to the point, however, is why is the word "strong" slung in there at all? If you take away the strong bit, that leaves "female character"— but isn't a female character just as inherently strong as a male character? Why do they need "strong" in there at all?
People say to me all the time "Derek, you're great," and I can't argue with them. They go on to say "I love your black shirt/blue jeans combo" and I nod wisely, agreeing with them but not needing to put it into words. Then they say "It's so cool that your books have strong female characters" and I shrug, and say "Hey, I'm a pretty awesome guy. Now go get me some Skittles."
Valkyrie is a strong female character. As in, she's strong, she's female, and she's a character. But she is not a Strong Female Character. She's not a role model — not really. She's deeply, DEEPLY flawed. Over the course of these eight books, she's done some outstandingly heroic things, but she's also done some downright mean and nasty and selfish things. She's hurt people. She's become arrogant (and not in the cool way that I am).
Here's what Holly has to Twitter-say about the subject:
"Strength" is one dimensional. It's saying "women can be strong like men", NOT "women are flawed, complex, brilliant, weak LIKE MEN."
I love it when readers don't like Valkyrie. I love it when they actively dislike her for the things she's done and the way she's behaved. But it's like they're surprised. It's like they can't compute. "Okay, wait, so... she saves the world but... but she's cheating on her boyfriend?? How is that POSSIBLE?"
Valkyrie is a character. She's as messed up as any male character I could ever write. That's what makes her real to me.
Having a girl as the protagonist in an action/adventure/horror/fantasy/whatever means things are going to get physical, and you all know how much I love my fight scenes. But having her kick ass is not why she's a good character.
Years ago, I was yapping to my mother about Buffy and Xena and talking about how great it is that we now have these TV shows about such strong female characters. My mother, who admittedly has never watched either show, asked me if these really WERE strong female characters, or if they were merely male characters with boobs.
Having a blonde cheerleader save the world with her martial arts skills doesn't equal feminism, she said. That's a male tactic. How about her saving the day using tactics that aren't all about punching and kicking and killing?
I didn't have an answer for her then. I still don't, even now. There's a whole debate to be had that I'm just not ready for, that I may never be ready for. My mother is a pacifist. I am not. We see the world differently, we operate differently, even though we want the same things. We both want equality and peace. My mother is the sort to talk her way to equality and peace. I'm the sort to talk to the point where I reckon more talk won't do any good, and then smash my way through to an understanding. It is not an enlightened viewpoint I hold. It is a crass, brutish viewpoint — but in a crass, brutish world, I believe my way is the way to go. Mum believes otherwise.
And that's the difference, I think, between us. We live in a world carved by men, where fear and oppression and violence are a part of our lives. I can't even IMAGINE a world sculpted by women, where other values have taken hold. I'm limited in that way. I could try not to be, but I honestly wouldn't know where to start. That's kind of sad, when you think about it. For all my imagination, I can't even imagine that...
... (turns to stare hauntingly out the window).
Monday, August 19, 2013
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Hi!
I forgot you were here...
Bye Dragona!
*slowly lights up a stick*
I was in a depressed-ish mood and just...Meh.
Niallerboo :(
#ChaseForBook9
Lol, good work, Dragona. :P
@Ez/Hunter: *laughs* Hm. You're probably both nice, on some levels. And, well, some say safe is a state of mind, so it comes down to whether you FEEL safe, I suppose. Do you feel safe? You don't have to answer that.
*nods* I'll take care to keep away from them, then.
But what if it's a nice gremlin? ...anyway.
That would be the gremlins' violence, not the violence of the people if I'm understanding you correctly. :)
*hugs Mara*
Brb a couple of seconds...
#ChaseForBook9
@Dragona: I'm crap at creating characters. Star Inkbright isn't a character. The character I use most is Hunter, and I can't see a reason why he would be on your ship. I'm sorry, it's just, he wouldn't be. Also . . . I can't modify him, because then he isn't HIM.
Any of my other characters . . . I also fail to see why they would be there.
I could give you Ez and unattach her to Hunter, except without Hunter, she isn't anybody. And everything she's learnt from Hunter, she won't have, and . . . and she isn't HER then. And who is she if she isn't her?
Same with a lot of my characters - if you take away their stories, they aren't them.
"A good friend once told me
We are memory
Without them we equal ntohing"
Without our experiences, we aren't us.
I'm getting sidetracked again, but I think you get the point, I hope.
#ChaseForBookNine
*hugs, lighting another stick and carefully setting it on a plate*
Bye Dragona
Hi Brave didn't know you were here.
#ChaseForBook9
@Star: Neither are we! :/
We have believers of numerous different religions, (though I think we have a majority of atheist or at least uncertain, tbh) but apparently that didn't mean a whole lot, at the time. ^^
Bye Dragona! *waves* G'luck tomorrow! :)
I'm still brb, I think.
I got distracted, and then I remained here, and now I don't remember what I was going to do.
I'll just wander and hope I remember. :P
#ChaseForBook9
well i wansn't really
K, Taia!
*feeds the fire more logs*
*cautiously sticks her hand into the flame*
Brb
*hugs Mara* I'll stress against that all problems are important. But I am sure it will all blow over for you soon... I hope
Ah. Warm.
Hunter: When I think about it, I don't feel safe. So I try not to think about it.
And, the gremlins may be perfectly nice, but they aren't nice to our minds. They need our minds. They will take them.
True. But who says gremloins aren't people? They're people to the other gremlins. They're intelligent enough to be considored people. THey're deadly.
Ez: *quietly* One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.
Hunter: Don't try to fix me, I'm not broken.
Ez: Evanescence?
Hunter: Yeah.
Ez: Stop looking about. There's no gremlins, okay? If tehy were here, you'd sense them.
Hunter: Unless they were already in my head.
Ez: Then I'd sense them.
Hunter: Unless they were in your head as well.
Ez: Well, then tough. YOu have to trust me, remember? Plus, wouldn't Bob tell you if they were in yuour head?
Hunter: @Bob: Bob?
*pause*
Ez: See?
Hunter: What if they're in Bob's head as well?
Ez: I know they aren't. Trust me.
Hunter: That's a really good argument.
Ez: Okay, go find some salt.
Hunter: *teleports off*
#ChaseForBookNine
Ah Tom Lehrer, you prodigious man, you. In any case, greetings to those who currently reside within the reaches of Blogland.
The element song!!!
Hey Sir
I, uhm, I'm going to go.
Night.
*disappears*
#ChaseForBook9
Back
Msd
#ChaseForBook9
@Mara: *hugs*
That sucks.
However, every cloud has a sliver lining. You just have to find it. :)
And, "I have less pain than otehrs so I don't deserve to be helped" is like "My pile of pain is bigger than yours." Pain is pain. Little problems can seem just as big as big problems, and just because pain is small doesn't mean it's okay. That's like saying, killing lots of people is really bad, so just killing on is okay. Every life is important and needs to be saved, and every problem is worthy of people trying to solve it.
*hugs*
Don't feel bad for being upset. :)
But don't be upset either if you can help it. :P
And if you can't . . . THen I'm sorry. Snow says DFTBA (don't forget to be awesome), but I don't need to say that to you, because you're already awesome. Istead, I shall say DFHAYA. Don't forget how awesome you are. :)
Msd, btw.
@Taia: Then, just WHAT THE HELL.
Isn't that illegal or something???
#ChaseForbookNine
Indeed, Adrasdos. And a fine evening to you, Maralie. In any case, Mr. Lehrer certainly had quite the acid tongue, and made more than a few satirical songs besides merely the Elements Song.
*killing one person
HELLO SIR! :)
#ChaseForBookNine
*hugs Mara*
Of course- but the Element song is by far my favourite.
*puts more sticks on the fire*
Ah, greetings, Star.
*hugs Mara* Hang in there. :/
It'll get better. Sooner rather than later, I hope.
I always figure pit's fine to be selfish - provided you're not hurting anyone in the process. It's hard to find a completely selfless act, because-
Sorry. I'm going off-topic. I don't even know what point I was going to segue into.
But my meaning is to say that it will get better, and I hope you'll be feeling better soon. I also figure it's a lot harder to make things better without feeling better about things, but that may just be my experience, and, more importantly, we all feel bad at times. I just hope the time doesn't last too long for you, that you pull through it alright, and that people around you will offer whatever help you need, if and when you find that you need it. :)
Sorry if that's a little vague, but I'm feeling quite inarticulate and I can't get right at what I want to say.
But yeah. *hugs*
#ChaseForBook9
Hello sir Reingington I don't think we've met. I'm Aisling. Aka Ais.
Bye Mara hope things get better soon. *hugs*
#ChaseForBook9
It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Aisling.
Hmm...
I don't think Trip's coming back.
*nids, putting a log on her fire*
@Ais: SIR'S AWESOME.
HE'S ALSO A GENTLEMAN SHARK WITH A MUSTACHE.
#ChaseForBookNine
Star, you do yourself a disservice to fall to such indulgence as praising my person.
*smothers the fire and casually slinks into the shadows*
You're a gentleman shark with a moustache? *grins* Jepic!
#ChaseForBook9
@Sir: Are sharks even people?
Because then I would have been praising your shark, not your person.
Although . . . bubbles are people, so maybe sharks are people.
But on the other hand, bubbles are, like, really awesome.
#ChaseForBookNine
@Ais: YAAAAAAY MY WORD JEPIC! *hugs*
#ChaseForbookNine
I'll speak with you later, hopefully, Mara. *hugs* Hope you're feeling better soon. Remember Zerrie, too, right? :)
@Star: Probably. They probably have ways of working around it? I don't know. *shrugs*
Maybe they thank God, but they don't specifically say 'God', so it's okay? I'm not sure.
I don't think it was every form, either. Ours, and possibly another couple, but idk if they did the same.
Nobody seemed to care, in any case.
I think they just say 'if you really don't want to, just don't join in.' Both my primary schools were the same, except in my second one,they DID have complaints, and we didn't have a choice. They still do that there, now.
I don't know how it works, but I never agreed with that one in particular.
Sorry if I'm rambling or ranting or something. But when I said 'inarticulate' before, I meant it. :P
#ChaseForBook9
Now, the personage of sharks is an extremely delicate matter, as you might guess...
@Hunter: Depends how you define 'people'.
There's a quote Jonathan Safran Foer's 'Eating Animals' that comes to mind, but I don't recall it. I may take a look in a minute. I think he was discussing consumption of dog. But, um... *frowns* *trails off*
#ChaseForBook9
*hugs Star* :D
#ChaseForBook9
Theeeeeeres antimony, arsenic, aluminum, selenium..
gtg be on later or tomozzy
Bye Brave
#ChaseForBook9
Bye brave!
*prowls around, her phone exploding with messages when she turns it on* meeeeeeeh
Oh? Gentlemen sharks with moustaches? Sounds fun. Reminds me of one of Joe Ledbetter's paintings, though I'm not sure how relevant it really is...
Good singing, Adra. :P/:)
Bye Brave! *waves*
#ChaseForBook9
@Taia: Well, if only humans can be people, then I am not a person.
Me: Actually, thinking of that, you probably ARE a person, Reingington. :/
@Taia: In my primary school, people from the church came in and did an assembly, adn sometimes they'd pray at the end, but that was about it. We still have church assemlies, but they tend to not involve praying.
Never, other than church assemblies, have we prayed in school . . .
I find it really odd to think of going to a Catholic school like people on here do and having your school be part of your church. FOr me, they're like separate worlds. I couldn't really imagine everyone at school being involved with church stuff . . . It would be freaky. :P
It would be good though, from a Christian perspective.
#ChaseForBookNine
:( FOURS BRAVE!
#ChaseForBookNine
*bows* I am amazing at singing the elements. I must, because alchemy. *nods*
GUYS
I HAVE A NEW CABLE FOR MY IPOD NOW, AND WHAT IS MORE, IT IS RETRACTABLE, AND WHAT IS MORE, IT IS PURPLE.
#ChaseForBook9
My step cousin has one of those!
Whoa. It is REALLY quiet.
*dances with an imaginary partner*
Hm. As it turns out, the Ledbetter thing's not that relevant. They don't look too gentlemanly, and lack moustaches. Never mind. :P
@Star: *nods* It might be the area, or tradition, or more likely both, but it just seems to happen here. We didn't have church assemblies, but we visited the church for events in my second primary school, and had to sit through the service - usually that was with little choice, too.
I disagree with forcing beliefs or the similar down somebody's throat, so to speak. It's fine to believe what you want, but don't expect everybody else to do the same. But I'm not sure. It was an odd school...
I think I live in an odd area, tbh. :P
#ChaseForBook9
Hi Fabi that sounds like a pretty cool cable :)
#ChaseForBook9
Hello Adra, Star, Sir, Taia, anyone else who's here...
And anyone who's not here...
And anyone who's sort of ghosting.
Adra, do you like berry smoothies?
#ChaseForBook9
AIS [hugs]
I haven't seen you in ages! How've you been?
#ChaseForBook9
I like berry smoothies- but veggie smoothies are better for you
@Fabi: YAY! *hugs*
@Taia: *shrugs* If you live in an odd area, that is good, because oddness is good, imo. :)
#ChaseForBookNine
Interesting...
[Takes note]
I'm not sure I'm actually going to need that, but we'll see.
Thank you.
#ChaseForBook9
FABI
ZERRIE
*is not here*
#ChaseForBook9
Why did you want to know?
@Hunter: *nods* Which is where the Foer quote comes in, kind of. It's only slightly relevant, but it picks up on a similar idea, if on another level.
He was discussing reasons why we have a 'taboo' of sorts against eating dog, in our culture, and bringing up points, and counter-points, and so on.
And one was that perhaps we shouldn't eat animals with significant mental capacities:
"If, by 'significant mental capacities' we mean what a dog has, then good for the dog. But such a definition would also include the pig, cow, chicken, and many species of sea animals. And it would exclude severely impaired humans."
So I guess it's hard to define 'people', because there are so many different factors and counter-points to definitions you could put up. Human - that could exclude a lot. Clever - excludes a lot, possiby includes other things, too.
Not sure where I'm going w/ this. But yeah.
#ChaseForBook9
HEMINGWAY FABI! :)
*hugs*
AWESOME. :D
*hugs Mara even though she isn't here*
Wbd/msd
#ChaseForBook9
Fabi I've been good. Had a busy summer. How've you been?
#ChaseForBooko
MARA
ZERRIE
[hugs]
[bounces]
[tries not to turn into a snake]
Adra- For Shunting Experiment. It's a long and rather weird part that I may end up editing out entirely.
#ChaseForBook9
Huh. Coolio! *hugs*
*hums*
I've been...
Well...
A lot of things.
Like wet. I've been very wet. Mainly because it's been above the usual temperature range for Seattle, and I keep dumping water on my head.
#ChaseForBook9
Speaking of which... I should go do that now.
Brb.
#ChaseForBook9
*waves*
*continues to practice dancing rather impressively*
I have returned!
#ChaseForBook9
Gtg night
#ChaseForBook9
Sorry, I think I'm gonna go.
Things and stuff.
*hugs all*
*wanders away, unable to decide whether to sing 'Here', 'We Are Cosmonaut', or 'The Explorer Settles Down'*
#ChaseForBook9
((Took you long enough :P I kid!!))
[hugs Taia and Ais]
Bye.
I have returned.
Hello Trip.
#ChaseForBook9
Liam is bringing you to meet his parents for the first time. You are extremely nervous, but he reassures you that everything will be fine. When you get their, his mum gives you a big hug and you have a long chat about Liam and One Direction, while he listens in, blushing. His dad shakes your hand and says you look like a fine young lady. Afterwards, you meet his sisters. They hug you and squeal happily, saying they can't believe their Liamykins is growing up. Liam is extremely embarrassed by this time, and you keep giggling. As you have dinner, he holds your hand under the table and you smile at each other the whole way through it. When you're finished, you volunteer to clean up. Liam helps you. As you're washing the dishes, you start a bubble fight with the washing-up liquid. He gets closer to you and you smile, tilting your head as he reaches into his pocket and takes out a knife. He stabs you in the abdomen and you die.
(:
*should really not be here*
#ChaseForBook9
((HOLY SHIT MARA. Bye Taiarawr!))
The Directioner fandom is a strange thing...
#ChaseForBook9
Sorry for my distance, playlisting.
@Taia: That's very interesting . . .
I can explain what 'people' means to me in my head, but I can't really put it into words. And . . . I think that we should eat animals, because everything eats something else in the food chain (apart from producers, and we aren't them). However . . . there are too many humans in the world, which means we have to farm animals to eat, which you could see as cruel, and we have hunted other animals to extinction.
Overpopulation is the problem.
Not eating other beings.
This is only slightly relevant, but people say that tigers who live in zoos aren't living proper, natural lives.
However . . . I don't think growing up in a house where you are almost completely safe from death, getting all your food from a supermarket without ever having to hunt it down and spending all day on computers is a natural life either, and yet it's a life many humans are leading.
We don't live natural lives any more than tigers in zoos do.
#ChaseForbOokNine
Mara. What the--?
#ChaseForBook9
@Mara: My first thought: WHAT. O_O
My second thought: I LIKE THAT. :)
*laughs*
DON'T MAKE ME LAUGH WHEN I'M MEANT TO BE ASLEEP! *glares*
#ChaseForBookNine
Bye Taia.
I was rather offended by Liam's father, I mean, I know I'm just a little camp, but homophobia on that scale is just wrong!
#ChaseForBook9
This is how sad we are. We make these for entertainment :P
I love those imagines though XD
#ChaseForBook9
I bet he laughed at the gay fag, as he lay bleeding out on the floor with his son, congratulating him on his excellent seduction and murder skills. Maybe, shook his hand, the right wing backwards bastard.
#ChaseForBook9
Trip - ... XD
STOP I'M SUPPOSED TO BE SLEEPINGGGGG NOT LAUGHING UNDER THE COVERS D:
Star - omg jinx! :O
Shall I find another one?
#ChaseForBook9
((I feel like this would be the Sherlock fandom..))
*continues dancing still rather impressively*
((Omfg))
Me: hey mom
Mom: what
Me: one direction are doing something right now
Mom: well you know what they aren't doing
Me:
Mom: thinking of you
Me:
Mom:
Me:
Mom:
Me:
Mom: why are you crying?
#ChaseForBook9
Oh, I love doing that. Okay, who wants a drink?
#ChaseForBook9
@Maraness: YES! :)
#ChaseForBookNine
Me: i love 1D so much 🌚
Mom: you might think this band is amazing but one day you'll look back at all the posters and say
Me: "look children it's your father"
Mom: what
Me: what
#ChaseForBook9
*stops dancing, nodding in a satisfactory way*
I would!
Oh Mara, you do entertain me.
#ChaseForBook9
What would you like?
#ChaseForBook9
LOUIS TOMLINSON:
50% Sass
50% Ass
TRUE.
Friend: bet you don't know the exact moment when Harry was born
Me: 1st February 1994 at 12:04am.
Friend:
Me: who do you think you are
who do you think I am
Teacher: okay everyone get into groups of two for a quiz
Me: *alone*
Everyone: *has a partner*
Me: *slides with my best friend*
Teacher: this quiz is on British pop music
Everyone: *turns to face me*
Me: now that you can't have me you suddenly want me
#ChaseForBook9
[Watches, snorting with laughter where appropriate]
Trip, do you like berry smoothies?
I forgot to ask Taia... :-/
#ChaseForBook9
OMG Mara ;D
*shrugs, walking from the trees* It doesn't matter
I do everything Fabi.
#ChaseForBook9
*chuckles*
@Mara: *laughs* :) :) :)
#ChaseForBookNine
Okay! *rushes back to the bar, re-emerges with a whiskey flask* It Doesn't Matter! *pours Adra a glass*
#ChaseForBook9
BRITSH POP MUSIC, THOUGH? IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN ON AMERICAN METAL MUSIC. :)
#ChaseForBookNine
Me: I'm a directioner 🌚
Friend: *gives me a weird look*
Me: DON'T HATE ME CUZ U AINT ME
Someone from school: hey i found your one direction fanpage!
Me: what
fanpage
lol
i don't own a fanpage
what
no way
how did you
i would never
no
how could i even
stop staring at me you creep
#ChaseForBook9
Interesting... [Writes it down]
Thank you.
[Continues to watch whatever is going on]
[Face continues to darken sort of fuchsia-ish]
#ChaseForBook9
*wanders in up to the bar counter*
Fabi are you choking?
Would you like one Fabi?
#ChaseForBook9
No, and I'm not going to actually explode, either. It just looks like that.
It's sort of like a seesaw...
#ChaseForBook9
No thank you, Trip.
#ChaseForBook9
Imagine...
You're at the pool and you're dangling your feet in the water. You see Harry playing with your daughter in the baby pool and GET OUT A GUN AND SHOOT THAT MOFO BC WHY THE HELL IS HARRY STYLES PLAYING WITH YOUR DAUGHTER
this aint no sweet cheeks imagine okay
#ChaseForBook9
[appears to explode]
#ChaseForBook9
Um.
*takes the glass* *salutes* Thank you Mr Bartender sir! *marches off outside*
Um, okay Fabi.
#ChaseFprBook9
You okay, Fabi? :/
#ChaseForBookNine
[Appears to form from dust]
My turn. [Smiles, hand on staff]
((Star, I honestly don't know how to answer that, but yeah. I'm fine))
#ChaseForBook9
I miss hunting people down.
#ChaseForBook9
*blinks*
Ah ha. Take my job. *grumbles, going to Fabi*
Hello
The letter you leave him when you pass.
{STOLEN FROM TUMBLR}
Niall: If your reading this, it means i've gone, that the disease won. I am so sorry, I really am. When I was diagnosed three months ago, when the doctors told me there was nothing they could do, that it had progressed too far, I felt like my whole world had collapsed. But you were there to hold me together. You kept me positive, kept me laughing, and gave me the time of my life, even though I could see how much it hurt you to know that I didn't have long left. I cannot thank you enough for not leaving me, for staying by my side, because I know I would never have made it as long as I have if you hadn't. I'm not afraid of dying, it's inevitable, but just the thought of leaving you alone in itself is enough to kill me. I love you so much. I love you I love you I love you. There aren't words for how special you are to me, how perfect you are. The thought that some day soon I won't see your smile anymore... Imagining the situation reversed, I know you won't want to hear what i'm about to ask of you, but it's true, I need it to be true. I want you to move on. I want you to find a girl who is incredible, kind and beautiful, someone who is so deserving of you. I want you to fall head over heels in love, I want you to have kids, I want you to be happy. I need you to be so so happy, and that need is ten times more powerful than the pain of you loving anyone other than me. I'll be watching over you, I promise, wherever I go. I don't think I can write much more, it's a bit difficult to concentrate, i'm just babbling now. I love you. Be happy, and always smile. I love you. Forever yours (Y/N) xxxx
Liam: Do you remember when we first got together? You told me you'd always be my hero, always protect me. We laughed at the time at the sheer cheesiness of the comment, never in a million years would I believe it be so true. Liam, you are my hero. You defended me when some 'fans' gave me hate, you punched that pap who shoved me on the floor so he could get a good picture of you, and there was that time you saved me from drowning in the sea whe we went to the beach. And then there's the time you looked after me when I broke my leg, bought me flowers just because, and how you'd always look at me like I was perfect. You've always made me feel like the most beautiful and kind person in the world, but really, I know that it is fact you, always has been. But it turns out you can't protect me from everything, namely this stupid illness. I can see how much your kicking yourself that there's nothing you can do to help, to stop it. I'm sorry. I can see how much it hurts you, seeing me like this, stuck in a stupid hospital bed not being able to do anything for myself, I can barely even write now. I feel so guilty, it's all my fault. I put on a brave face for you, but i'm not sure if you ever believed it, I knew how much you were hurting already and I didn't want the truth to add to that. The truth is, i'm in pain. It hurts so much. Just opening my eyes, the bright light, it hurts. But it's worth it to see you again. If your reading this, i'm gone, and I hope you can comfort yourself in that I don't hurt anymore, the pain has gone. I love you so much Liam, thank you for all the perfect memories you gave me, my hero. It's time for me to look after you, i'll make sure you stay safe from wherever I am. I love you my hero, my protecter, (Y/N) xxxxx
TBC
#ChaseForBook9
Hello.
[Face turns slightly purple]
Uh-uh. Not yet!
[Begins muttering hurriedly]
#ChaseForBook9
Oh fuck Mara
*raises an eyebrow* Um- what's happening?
Harry: Meeting you was the best thing that ever happened to me. 4 years ago you became a friend, and then a best friend. 3 years and 2 months ago you became the perfect boyfriend i'd always imagined. You have made my life so exciting, so happy, so loved. When we discovered 4 months ago that I was ill, and that it was too far along for me to get better, you can't understand how blessed I felt that i'd had the chance to meet you. You are perfect, beautiful and kind, and I love you so much. If your reading this then I am dead, and I need to explain to you my decision, something i've so far not been able to tell you, for fear of your reaction. 24 days ago (or it is as I write this letter anyway) you proposed to me. You wanted to jump on a plane, go to Las Vegas and elope. You were so excited, so happy... until I said no. I never got to properly explain myself, because the next day is when this disease began to really start beating me up. You were too worried about getting me the best medical care and making sure I was comfy to question my decision, or at least you never voiced it. There aren't words to explain how long and how much I have dreamt of one day being 'Mrs (Y/N) Styles'. I've always wanted it from the moment I met you, I love you so much. But thats why I had to say no. Your young, in a world famous band, and drop dead gorgeous - I couldn't make you a widow. You're adorable when you sleep you know. You're here now as I write this, asleep, head on my lap. God how i'm going to miss you, playing with your curls. I didn't want to get emotional, not yet, but now i'm crying. I'm tired, going to join you in dream land for a while. Never doubt my love for you. I will miss you so much, wherever I am. Be happy, have the best life ever, for the both of us. But please don't forget me Styles, because i'll never ever forget you. Love (Y/N) xxxx
Zayn: How on earth I ended up with someone as talented, good looking and genuine as you I have no idea. Clearly i'm the luckiest girl in the world. Or I would be if it wasn't for this stupid illness. You know that was the first time I ever saw you cry, when I sat you down and told you the bad news. It broke my heart. You were amazing. You stuck by me, made me feel beautiful and loved, even when all my hair had fallen out. Do you remember how distraught I was? Seems silly for me to have got so worked up over something as trivial as that. Thank you for sitting with me through all the dreaded chemo appointments. I think I would've given up already if it hadn't been for you. You'd rub my back while I cried, and threw up, singing til I felt better. Your voice is the most beautiful thing on this earth to me. Never stop. Thats made me think - would you and the boys sing at my funeral? One Thing. That's my favorite, and it's happy, I don't want people to be sad. I love you Zayn, more than I ever thought was possible. From the moment you bumped into me in Starbucks and spilt your coffee all down me, I knew you were the one. Love at first sight, literally. If your seeing this message, it means that i've gone. I hope your not too sad. Remember how happy we were, all the laughs we had, not the pain that this caused us. I'll be watching out for you wherever I go, you can be sure of it. I love you babe, so much. (Y/N) xxxxx
TBC
#ChaseForBook9
((Mara, those are so... [not crying]))
((Oh, and just so you know, Careen looks nothing like Fabi, I just haven't found a good profile pic yet. Trying to draw one.))
#ChaseForBook9
ONE MORE WEEK UNTIL LAST STAND OF DEAD MEN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Not here, just reminding you all)
ONE MORE WEEK UNTIL LAST STAND OF DEAD MEN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Not here, just reminding you all)
Louis: I always used to imagine us growing old together. I can just see us being that grumpy old couple sat on a porch in our rocking chairs. You know like the ones you see in all the cartoons, shouting at passers by. You with false teeth. It'd be hilarious, and it wouldn't matter whether our neighbours liked us or not because we'd have eachother. Looks like it can never happen now though, because if your reading this then i'm chilling with Jesus, kicked the bucket etc etc. Sorry. I was never good with serious stuff - but saying that neither are you! Hey, why did the bee get married? Because he found his honey! I know it's rubbush, but I couldn't think of another. Did you laugh? It's been so long since I last heard you properly laugh. I miss it. I know how hard you've tried to stay strong for me, and I love you so much for it. I love your laugh. I love your care free attitude. Before I met you I was shy, quite reserved, but you brought me out of my shell, made me more spontaneous. You made me realise I don't need to please everyone, so long as I have those around me that love me for me. And you loved me for me. You've mad my life so happy Louis, I love you. I hate myself for never telling you that often enough, because I really do love you Louis, with all my heart. Rest assured that I will be looking down on you from my penthouse in the sky, might even pull a few pranks on you along the way if I can. And i'm going to watch and laugh when I get to see you and whoever the lucky girl is you grow old with, grumpy and mardy, sat on your rocking chairs on the porch. I love you Louis, never forget that. Keep laughing sweetheart, (Y/N) xxxx P.S. I thought of another joke: Why did the tomato blush? Because he saw the salad dressing!
...
Well, that made my eyes sweat.
...
Mmmmm I may just go cry now brb
*hugs Fabi*
#ChaseForBook9
Fabi's trying to bring up her end of the seesaw, but I don't like that. It's not fun.
I told you I wouldn't kill your friends!
#ChaseForBook9
I'm afraid I don't understand
. . . That's so sad. *hugs Maraness*
#ChaseForBookNine
Maraness... :(
That is some potent stuff you got there Mara.
#ChaseForBook9
[Rolls eyes and leans against staff]
My name is Careen Pretense. I experiment with dead people.
My plan was to use the leftover life energy from the dead person I found lying around. I was going to be invincible, and then Fabienne went and ruined it!
Basically one of us is here, the other's dead, and my face turning purple means Fabi will be back with you all shortly, and I'll appear to explode.
Unless I can... Hmm...
[Twists staff around in a circle]
#ChaseForBook9
(( [hugs Mara] [cries] ))
#ChaseForBook9
Okay, I'm going to go to sleep now, because I'm tired . . .
Fours. I love you all. DFHAYA. *hugs*
#ChaseForBookNine
I don't like the sound of that.
#ChaseForBook9
Night Star!
#ChaseForBook9
((Bye Star [hugs]))
[Twists staff around some more, muttering angrily, face turning darker]
#ChaseForBook9
Night STARALAR!
And don't you that that is a bit rude, disrupting what should be left alone?
...
Harry's though...
And Liam. Liam, the hero. He wanted to be Batman, to save people's lives. Little did he know, he saved so many, just by being himself. *smiles*
And Louis.... Oh God.
And as for Zayn's... perfect. Beautiful. Ugh.
And Niall. Niall, Niall, Niall. Mmm.
I cannot imagine One Direction without one of the members...
Hold on, I need to find a tissue.
#ChaseForBook9
*hugs Star* Night (: Sleep tight.xx
Msd.
DAMN YOU TUMBLR, I'M HERE BAWLING MY EYES OUT. :P
#ChaseForBook9
[Scowls]
If she'd been properly dead and in the afterlife, not a ghost, she wouldn't need that energy! How was I supposed to know that---? [appears to explode]
#ChaseForBook9
*averts her eyes, stumbling backwards*
I need
To er, go. I have 20%
Sorry!
#ChaseForBook9
Awh... Okay. *sulks*
[Forms from the dust]
[Face starts turning purple]
I think this'll be going on for quite some time. I'll take it all elsewhere, though, don't worry.
And I'm really sorry...
#ChaseForBook9
I need to stop looking at these sad imagines... *mutters*
Tumblr.
ZAYN MALIK SAD IMAGINE #2
"Oh babe! Where are you? You know if I found you I’m going to kiss you really hard, I’m telling you!", He shouted over.
I giggled behind the tall grass. We are playing hide and seek and its our past time whenever we are bored. When I turned to look at him again, he was beside me staring at me. I tried to run but he caught me by my waist. “Gotcha, babe”, he whispered to my ear. He kissed my neck and he run his lips through my cheek until it reaches my lips. His lips are so soft and its hard to resist it. He, then, pulled away and I chuckled. He cough through his hankee and I noticed something there. I looked at him very confusely. “Gimme the hankee..”, I said. He just smiled. “I said.. Give me your hankee”
I can see the fear on his eyes. He hand me over his hankee slowly. I was shocked at what I saw there. There are blood stains. “Zayn?”
He glance at me and looked down on his feet. “Zayn, babe.. Mind explaning what is this?”, I asked and I really have this nervous tone.
"I..", he started. I was.. ill", he almost whispered.
I can feel my heart is tearing into pieces. “What.. What do you mean?”
"I have a.. Leukemia", he said.
My knees trembled. Its like I’m going to fall but I manage myself. “Since when?”, I manage to asked.
"Last year.. Babe, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier", he said.
"Why.. Why..", I mumbled and I can’t continue to talk. "Am I the only one who knows this thing?"
"No.. Liam, Harry, Louis and Niall knows this. My parents and sisters also.. You’re the only one.. Who didn’t know this.", he said lowly.
"So I’m the last one.. To know this"
He held me close to his body. “I thought I can make it.. But the doctor says.. I don’t have much time”, he whispered. He is crying and I tried not to.
I can feel my blood run out of my face. “How much time?”, I manage again to asked and I tried my face to stay hard from crying.
"16 days..", he said lowly.
"What?! 16 Days?!", I beamed. That’s when I started to cry. So I only have 16 days left to be with him. 16 days to feel his arms around mine. I can’t even imagine life without him.
He cupped my face by his hands as the tears keep streaming down his face. “Sorry.. I will never do my promise to you. We will never.. We will never grow together”, he cried. I burden my face into his chest and my tears won’t stop flowing from my eyes.
I tried to be strong with him and smile even though my heart is crushing inside of me.
Day 1
We went to the park. “Babe.. Lets ride the roller coaster!”, he whooped.
"A roller coaster that is life?", I joked. He chuckled. "C’mon babe!", he said as he grabbed my hand and run through the entrance of Roller Coaster Riding.
Day 2
We watched a movie at the cinema. I glance at him. He was shivering. So I grabbed his face and kissed him. it was a deep kiss and I can feel his hot breath. I pulled away. “Still feeling cold, babe?”, I whispered. He grinned. “No more”
Day 3
We go to the concert of his favorite band. We are having fun until I saw him feeling uneasy. He was shaking. I circled my arms around his waist. “Are you okay, babe?”, I asked. “Yes.. I was just-” He, then, coughed really hard. “Lets go babe.. I think we need to go home”, I shouted to him over the very noisy crowded people.
"So Sorry, babe..", he said lowly.
Day 4
We go to the seaside. We waited for the fireworks. Until the first one rises. We are very stunned by the beauty of the night sky with those fireworks. I glance at him and he seemed very happy. He put his arms around my waist and held me close to his. He crushed his lips to mine passionately.
TBC
(Sorry, am I being annoying? :/)
Day 5
Its Christmas. He arrived at my home almost evening. We eat food together with my family and have a talk. Later, he grabbed my hands and walk through outside the house. “Where are we going?”, I asked. He then stopped beside one woodstand. We are under the mistletoe. He smiled and kissed my lips very slowly as if feeling the moment. I was his first kissed under the mistletoe.
Day 6
He looks very pale. His lips are chapped and faded. He was laying in his bed and shivering. I put the other blanket to warm him up in coldness. He held my hand. “Babe.. Please.. S-stay for awhile here with m-me”, he mumbled. It really breaks my heart watching him suffering. I tried not to cry.
Day 7
…
Day 8
…
Day 9
…
Day 10
…
Day 11
…
Day 12
He’s awake. “Babe.. You want something?”, I asked as I run my hands through his fading hair. “You..”, he said as he crooked a smile. His hair is falling down. He looks like he doesn’t have a blood anymore. I feel like I’m going to cry but I really forced myself not too. I don’t want him to see me crying and hurt. I manage to smiled at him. He is still look beautiful to me. That never fades away.
Day 13
"[y/n]! Babe!", he shouted over. I run through his room. "Babe! Why?", I screamed. There are blood droplets beside his bed. "I choked up blood..", he mumbled. I was shaking. I look at him and he is sad. I tried to smile. "Its okay.. I’m gonna clean this up"
Day 14
…
Day 15
He keeps on choking up lots of blood. until the boys arrived. Liam, Harry, Niall and Louis. “Vas Happenin Boys?”, Zayn joked with his weak voice. The boys got teary eyed as they saw him laying there suffering and dying. They tried to laugh about it. But they can’t help it and cried. I cried at the corner of the room and closed my eyes. I can’t watch it. They group hug together. It will be their most memorable day being together. As brother. As friends. As bestfriends forever.
Day 16.. Last day
I was staring at him sleeping. Then he slightly opened his eyes. “Babe.. Will you lay beside me?”, he whispered. He can’t hardly breathe. I go and lay beside him as he put his arms around my waist. My head was laying on his chest. “[y/n].. [y/n].. [y/n].. I love you so much, babe”, he whispered. “I love you so much too.. Always”, I said.
”..And forever”, he whispered. He began to hummed a song for me and I fall asleep.
I woke up feeling cranky. I looked at him. He is sleeping. I felt nervous. “Babe..”, I tapped him slightly. He was not moving. “Babe!”, I shouted at him. “Babe! Wake up!”, I shouted again. But he is not still moving nor opening up his eyes. I cried at his chest. It was so hard. My hands are shaking. I tried to grab my phone and called the boys and reported them what just happened. They came over a couple of minutes later and they saw me on my knees, crying. Louis came over to me and trying to calm me. Niall and Harry are at the door and not moving. Looking very shocked. Liam go through the bed where Zayn is laying. He cried at him. “Zayn.. Why did you left us?”, he cried. We are all crying outloud. I walk through Zayn and held his hand while I’m shaking. I closed my eyes and think of our good times together. Ignoring the loud cryings inside this room.
..The End
...
#ChaseForBook9
((You're not being annoying Mara, though you're making me tear up a little.))
#ChaseForBook9
[Face turns purpler, disappears via amulet before it switches again]
#ChaseForBook9
Mara quit killing me please.
*stares at Fabi, before getting one last phone call, screaming and dropping the phone, immediately making a portal, sprinting through it*
((Wbd))
Zayn...
*is totally not crying...*
*hugs Fabi*
I'll stop now...
Zayn Zayn Zayn Zayn
Zaynypoo.
"He's Zayn. The vain one. See what I did there?"
"i'm a Bradford Bad Boii, yo."
"I don't even say that anymore...!"
"I'm so proud of Little Mix, especially when they broke the Spice Girls' record."
"And what's your name?"
"I'm Zayn. Malik."
*whacks self with rocking chair* STOP MARA STOP
#ChaseForBook9
I have to be up in seven hours. *facepalm*
*hugs Adra and Fabi* Night.xx
#ChaseForBook9
Mara lol *hugs* Night dear!!!
*returns several hours later, sitting down*
Fabi?
((Night Mara! [hugs]))
((Wbd, Mom's on the phone with someone talking about me, and I'm trying to figure out who she's talking to.))
#ChaseForBook9
((K!))
[Glowing amulet light and Fabi appears, face its normal color]
Apparently I'm the more stubborn one...
#ChaseForBook9
Before I go, I wrote this and it made me bawl.
One day, I know I'll realise that I will never meet One Direction. I will never get to speak to them and tell them how much they impacted my life. I will pack all my posters and merchandise in a box labeled "Memories" and will pick up a One Direction CD. I'll look at the box, tears forming in my eyes as I remember those days when I used to be in the fandom. I'll remember all my friends - Eleanna, Lou, Kathleen, etc - and think to myself, "I miss those days." Those days when drama happened every day, but everyone got over it. Because we were a family. Not just a fandom, but a family. We patch ourselves up, together. But in a few years, One Direction will go on their last tour. They will stand on the last stage they will ever stand on, and say those famous words that will impact on every Directioner's life, the words that will tear our world into little pieces, the words that we never expected to hear.
"Hi, we were One Direction."
#ChaseForBook9
Ouch Mars... I got chills.
Whoa...
*stares at Fabi* what?
(([hugs Mara]))
[Sighs and sits down]
I'm not sure...
#ChaseForBook9
Huh... *lies down*
Sorry... I'm in a depressedish mood and I don't know why because Zerrie and...
I don't know.
Night, for real this time.
#ChaseForBook9
(([hugs Mara again]))
You okay, Adra?
#ChaseForBook9
Yeah. Totes.
Are you> okay?
It feels weird to actually be able to knock things over if I get too clumsy. [Laughs]
And I'm fine, I think. Starting to get the hang of this.
#ChaseForBook9
*hugs* YAY
[hugs back]
So, what have you been up to lately?
#ChaseForBook9
Ah a little bit of this, a little bit of that.
Mm...
Sorry about the whole Jubi + Death + Zaf + Alcohol thing. The best I could manage was to keep them from lighting themselves on fire.
#ChaseForBook9
It wasn't your fault. They just have no alcohol tolerance.
*grumbles, checking her texts which seem to be exploding again*
[Shrugs and sits down someplace, scribbling in a notebook]
#ChaseForBook9
*picks up a call*
*exchanges a few heated words before opening another portal*
*walks through to a hospital OR on the other side*
[Watches]
Is everything ok?
#ChaseForBook9
Oh...
#ChaseForBook9
*stumbles back in a few minutes later, pale*
*drinks apple juice and is nomming crackers*
*coughs* Ugh....
You alright? What happened?
#ChaseForBook9
I had to donate some blood..
*noms on some peanuts* Yeah
Oh...
[Falls silent]
#ChaseForBook9
Yeah...
*checks her phone, frowning*
I... I should go.
[Turns quickly, so Adra can't see Fabi's face starting to turn purple]
[Walks off in a hurry]
((Gtg, I think. Not sure... Maybe very very distant.))
#ChaseForBook9
((Okay!!))
*picks up her phone, starting a call, looking up at the sky*
Adrasdos Dark... Yes, my brother and sister... Antonio and Victoria, They were checked in quite a number of hours ago....
Yes.
No! Never.
Just tell me what the verdict is.
...
*her eyes glaze over and she falls silent*
..
...
...
Yes. I understand. Only... *her voice wavers* only her?
Okay.
No, no other family.
Yes.
Thank you.
*clicks off the phone, putting it down, staring up*
*breathes in and out slowly, concentrating on the sky above her*
HAAII!!
Hello Jubi.
ADRA!!!!!!!!!!!! *Supermegatacklehugsofdoom*
HAAIII!!!! :D
HOW GOES IT? :)
In RP or real life?
Real life I guess.. xP
Ah. In real life I am doing my Church and Sacraments homework. *nods* You?
ooh Fuun... I think xP
And I have to go and eat diner now... :(
so BAAIII!!!!! /brb
*waves*
*puts in her earphones, calmly listening to music*
*Stumbles in and falls to the ground with a moan*
Hi.
I just went outside to get away from the spiders.
And it's, like, working.
This is so not funny.
#ChaseForBook9
It's a sign, Fabi.
Ugh. It has been a long and horrible day. *curls ina ball*
God, I hate being sick, especially when there is a excursion to the new art museum...
Well then, Fabi. That is a... Most humorous situation indeed.
[hugs Adra] :-/
I guess.
Not sure what it's supposed to be a sign of.
Oh, four-leaf clover. I think they're following me...
#ChaseForBook9
I hope you feel better soon, Death.
Hello Sir. It is, isn't it? [Laughs]
#ChaseForBook9
*Smiles* I read a book that said if four leaf clovers are following you, you're being stalked by a faerie assassin...
Oh, I just thought I should point that out...
Hi Sharky!
I like faerie assassins.
*nods*
Sir, wb?
*sips more apple juice, lying on her side and checking more of her messages on her phone*
Well, Adrasdos, I do suppose everyone has those days. Here's to a better tomorrow, eh?
I find more of them than most people I know. Probably because I pay attention to detail. Sometimes.
A faerie assassin. Huh. Well, I don't see one in the near vicinity, but that doesn't really say much.
#ChaseForBook9
Everybody thought I was a faerie assassin for a while... I kept appearing on roves around school...
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