Thank you.
I exchanged a few tweets with her a few weeks ago, then visited her twitter page. I figured if she was half as funny in her book as she is on twitter, it'd be a book worth reading. So I bought it, and I've just finished it.
My Review of Geek Girl
Geek Girl is a book about a girl who is a geek. There are no ninjas in it. Virtually no one dies. There are two haircuts (one planned, one not). There are bizarre characters. There is one tremendously awful bully that makes you want to punch the page. There are clothes and shoes.
And DESPITE all the lack of bloodshed... this book is brilliant.
Harriet is 15 years old. She's a geek. She likes facts and figures and doing her homework. She's not exactly popular in school. She's just... weird. Her mind works in unusual ways. When she's plucked from her life and told she's going to be a model she thinks everything is going to get better— she's going to change and suddenly be cool and have friends...
There are lines in this book that will make you laugh out loud. There are jokes. One liners. Gags. Set ups and payoffs. It may deal with popularity (or lack of same), and it may deal with bullying, and insecurity, and it may play with the myth of metamorphosis... but even when Harriet is at her most vulnerable, she is never less than hilarious.
If it helps, you can think of Harriet as the younger sister to Clarabelle, in the Skulduggery books. She is, literally, THAT weird. And THAT loveable.
I would rate this book eight fish out of eight.
But please, let's not mention how much Holly fancies me. It's just... it's embarrassing.
4,994 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 4801 – 4994 of 4994I dedicate this page to...not dying
But it's unavoidable, it's everywhere! [Laughs]
It's the source of my power!
#ChaseForBook9
It would be pointless. I have matters that are actually important to attend to.
You are not one of them.
Well, prepare to put in all your effort. You won't succeed.
#ChaseForBook9
*goes up to look at Em* Looks like Necromancy
Talk; sorry... emailing.
Back now. I think. Idek myself.
Sorry, Trip. *winces*
Roleplay;
I...
*stands up*
I need to go. I'm sorry. Something...
Let's just say, I don't feel well. *disappears*
#ChaseForBook9
I am not planning to even start looking. I do not concern myself with petty, childish matters.
Niccolo! Get back!
*shadows turn sharp and starts stabbing my back again*
*screams in pain*
M☂r☂? Why don't you feel well?
But I thought you could crack any case by looking at it?
#ChaseForBook9
*he☂ls Em quickly*
This should get rid of the p☂in temporarily...
((Mara...[hugs]))
#ChaseForBook9
*gasps, covers hands with mouth, and lets knees fold under self, shaking slightly* *voice is small* Yeah, we should do something... About the shadows...
Talking: I might have to leave now
#ChaseForBook9
I can. This is not a case. This is merely trivia.
When I wish to know them, I will know them.
Trust me.
Emerald, what are those?
#ChaseForBook9
Like I said, I should be able to move them. Actually, it totally depends on what they are, but I can certainly try. Does anyone have a jar? Or a watermelon?
((Bye in advance, Ari))
#ChaseForBook9
*keeps he☂ling Em*
*fights the shadows with energy*
In my bar?!
#ChaseForBook9
*attempts to block shadows with other shadows*
Talking: Since this is your injury, I'm not sure whether or not that will work, but I've tried anyway- you can dictate whether or not that was successful.
#ChaseForBook9
I h☂ve a w☂terb☂n☂n☂! Does th☂t help??????
(so fun to type th☂t... b☂n☂n☂!!!!)
Th☂t looks like it'll do the trick, Niccolo.
But I c☂n't be sure...
Is there anything I could assist with?
*is quiet*
You can shut up.
That wasn't very nice. Also, you forgot the umbrellas.
D☂ng it.
Z☂f, ☂re you ok☂y?
Mycroft, trivia? They are the best kept secrets of all time! Surely you want to know? *swats away a shadow* Or is it just not worth your time? If the best secrets of all time aren't good enough, then what is?
#ChaseForBook9
Talking: gone now, sorry. Aretha and I will return later, though it's hard to say when.
#ChaseForBook9
*growls at everyone*
Nobody touch me!!!
These are torture shadows. Deacon's way of making sure someone dies even if he isn't around.
They are locked on me and will attack anybody that tries to destroy them.
*screams in pain again*
*back is now bloody and shredded*
Oh, that's a nice challenge, a never ending stream of death! *creates dome around group, giving a moments breathing space*
#ChaseForBook9
Well that stinks!
Are you quite sure I can't relocate them to a watermelon?
#ChaseForBook9
*sits in tree*
*chews lip*
#ChaseForBook9
*is locked in ferocious combat with shadows*
#ChaseForBook9
Oh God, I'm the only he☂ler ☂round right now... What should I do????
I h☂ve ☂ j☂r, F☂bi *h☂nds over j☂r*
((Oh gosh, whether or not to bring J.A. in...))
#ChaseForBook9
IS ☂NYBODY ☂ NECROM☂NCER????
I gtg...dunno when ill be back...
I don't think so...
I'm the only superstrong combatant, it's pretty inconvenient.
#ChaseForBook9
Or a jar! Thanks for that. [Nods at Ember]
((And Fabi is a completely separate person who is only mildly responsible for Glow's actions))
#ChaseForBook9
*punches Mycroft very hard in the face*
#/ChaseForBook9
NOW EVERYBODY'S LE☂VING
Glowworm! I think I could tr☂nsfer Em's soul into ☂nother body! Do you think the sh☂dows would keep ☂tt☂cking the new body??
[Laughs]
You want to fight them then? Cool!
I'll be happy to move them into a jar, if anyone's interested!
#ChaseForBook9
Probably!
#ChaseForBook9
*shoots lasers out of umbrella at Trip*
(don't you know it's rude to punch UMBRELLA girl, Trip? XP)
Do it! Do the jar thing!
#ChaseForBook9
Probably not, they'd register that the old one was dead, but does Em really want a new body?
#ChaseForBook9
YOU TWO BEH☂VE FOR THE L☂ST GODD☂MN TIME OR I WILL SUCK OUT YOUR SOULS
They are locked onto my essence Ember.
They'll know. He'll know!
*doubles over in pain*
*starts crying uncontrollably*
*deflects lasers* THE HELL WAS THAT?!
#chaseForBook9
Em, could I tr☂nsfer your soul to ☂nother body? I h☂ve some cool bodies ☂round... ☂nd pot☂toes....
F☂BI DO THE J☂R THING!
You can try, but my soul'll fight back! *draws sword and fills with soul energy, starts using it on the shadows* GRAAAAH!
#ChaswFoeBook9
Mm kay!
[Reaches out and does her spell-relocation thing to move the shadows to the jar]
((Uh, Em's shadows, whether it works is up to her))
#ChaseForBook9
*watches everything unfold*
*hides*
#ChaseForBook9
(that's not fair if you punched me but I can't hurt you with the lasers /:( hmp)
A little something Ember rigged for me...*kicks Trip in the pants*
MYCROFT STOP IT OR I WON'T B☂KE YOU ☂NY MORE C☂KE
*if this were re☂l this would be TOT☂L CH☂OS*
But.., lasers? *deflects * do try harder Mr. Holmes.
#ChaseForBook9
*punches Trip*
(Okay, considering what she just said, I doubt the relocation would work. Pickle.)
#ChaseForBook9
*and it actually hits, deflecty-pants*
*sighs* Ok☂y, you know wh☂t, we're screwed.
[Eyes glow brighter with each punch/kick/laser]
#ChaseForBook9
*shadows turn jagged and smash the jar*
*suddenly Em stops screaming and stands up in the pool of blood. Blood still dripping and oozing from her back*
*her eyes closed and breathing heavy*
*reels* Oh you asked for it mate. *Opens up a flurry of punches and kicks perfectly flowing from one another.*
#CjaseForBook9
*takes knife out of umbrella handle and stabs Trip, and by the way, it does injure him. Just a bit.*
[Looks at smashed jar]
Whoa...
#ChaseForBook9
*eyes widen*
*whispers* Stop...
*squeezes eyes shut*
#ChaseForBook9
I should've given you ☂n unbre☂k☂ble j☂r...
EM!!!!!! ☂RE YOU OK☂Y?
TRIP ☂ND MYCROFT STOP IT STOP IT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*bre☂ks the two of them up ☂nd ☂ccidentally gets punched by both Trip ☂nd Mycroft*
*I keep l☂ughing ☂bout how ridiculous this whole scene is getting*
Dammit, Ember, get out of the way!
*eyes widen, grasps knife handle, flings it at Mycroft(and it hits, in the abdomen) fires lasers I to My crofts shins, falls to floor*
#ChaseForBook9
J.A. [Walks over to Mara] What is it? Are you alright?
#ChaseForBook9
*heals self* *takes Mycroft's soul out and relocates it into her own body*
Gre☂t, now
I seem to have been
I h☂ve two voices
relocated to
in my he☂d
another body
☂ND TRIP DON'T YOU D☂RE TRY TO PUNCH ME.
*runs back in*
What the FUCK is happening?
Em......
#ChaseForBook9
Trip! ☂re you
LEAVE HIM FOR GOD'S SAKE
ok☂y? Did he hurt
Ember can you heal
you too b☂dly?
my body?
FINE. BUT L☂TER.
*crawls over*
#ChaseForBook9
(☂dr☂, you should NOT h☂ve left! Re☂d the comments you missed, they're HYSTERIC☂L)
*he☂ls Trip*
GOTT☂ GO
(Th☂t w☂s super fun Trip :) BYE)
I'm... *grits teeth* fine. I've had worse. But, I can help Em.
#ChaseForBook9
Bye September!
Hey Adra!
#ChaseForBook9
*eyes open to show bright green ones instead of normal blue eyes*
*Em smiles an unsettling smile*
*voice distorted with another voice*
Well good evening ladies and gentlemen.
J.A.: Mycroft and Trip have been fighting, Glow-eye put the shadows in a jar, then it broke, then Em stood up. And the rest I don't know.
Glow: [Watches everything with interest]
((Bye Ember!))
#ChaseForBook9
*splays hands, Em is held to the floor by energy*
#ChaseForBook9
Glow: Who the 13102222 is THAT?
#ChaseForBook9
Who are you and why are you here?
#ChaseForBook9
*runs over to Trip* are you alright?
Well, *holds wound* I got stabbed. But. I guess I'm better than I might be.
#ChaseForBook9
F☂lse ☂l☂rm. I'm b☂ck.
He's fine, I just he☂led him.
(Trip, I ☂lre☂dy he☂led you.)
*eyes widen*
What?
By whom?
What is this?
*smiles again*
*can't move because of Trip's energy*
Tsk, tsk, tsk
We don't want to hurt Emerald now do we?
(Sorry, is distant...)
(Bye Ember!)
*looks down at J.A.*
Yeah... I-I'm fine, thanks.
#ChaseForBook9
I may be healed but, that doesn't mean the shock is any better. *smiles grimly*
#ChaseForBook9
(Trip punched Mycroft, then Mycroft shot lasers at him, then punched him, then Trip started kicking him, then Mycroft too, then I tried to stop them but got punched, so I took Mycroft's soul out of his body and put it into mine.)
That was a rather
Em! Wh☂t's
long-winded
h☂ppening?
explanation.
(Fuck! I gtg again. I'll bbl. trip, don't die!)
Glow: Dude! Who the 13102222 are you?
#ChaseForBook9
This won't hurt Emerald, but it'll restrain you.
#ChaseForBook9
Who ☂re you?
Explain yourself, impostor.
J.A.: If you're sure...
((Bye Adra))
#ChaseForBook9
Bye Adra!
#ChaseForBook9
I'm so sorry, Trip...
I'm not.
SHUT UP. *sl☂ps f☂ce*
Well that was stupid.
Spe☂k for yourself.
(bye ☂dr☂!!)
Now ☂pologize.
No!
DO IT. NOW.
Fine... Castalan, you're a bumbling idiot--
*SL☂P* owwwwwww
owwwwww- but I shouldn't have done that. Please forgive me. I don't want to fight with you any more.
Good. *strokes ☂rm*
Stop that.
September, it's not your fault. Just give Mycroft a mental slap for me eh?
#ChaseForBook9
(Bye Adra!)
(DEAR LORD IT IS TOO HOT TO TRY TO SLEEP OH MY GOLDEN GOD which means I'll probably be here for a while :P)
(sorry, I don't think you can really get rid of me)
*looks at Em, Ember and Trip* Mmm...
#ChaseForBook9
Who. Are. You?
#ChaseForBook9
((I think I'm going now. Nice to be sort-of-back. Bye, all.))
#ChaseForBook9
Bye!
#ChaseForBook9
I'm not an imposter... merely a temporary guest in the host's body.
And would you like to see how restraining me doesn't hurt Emerald, Mr. Castalan?
*shadows start pulling apart the gaping wounds*
*a scream erupts from Em's mouth*
*bubble a appears over Em, energy fights off shadows* oh yeah, the trick up my sleeve.
#ChaseForBook9
*laughs*
That won't work I'm afraid. Those shadows are connected to her nervous system.
Everytime you go to attack or prevent their job, they just multiply and will instead go under her skin.
Well that's just not playing fair.
I guess. I guess you win Deacon. Well done. Have fun killing Em. *walks out*
#ChaseForBook9
(Bye J.A./Fabi! *hugs*)
(msd, I am actually exhausted :/)
*climbs into 1DHouse* *mumbles under breath*
#ChaseForBook9
*releases energy*
#ChaseForBook9
*climbs up into 1D house.* Hey Mara.
#ChaseForBook9
*jumps* *turns around*
Oh, Trip. Hey. *sounds tired*
#ChaseForBook9
*jumps back in*
Bitch.
(Wbd btw)
(Hey Adra!)
#ChaseForBook9
Gtg' bye.
#ChaseForBook9
Hi... What happened to everyone?
Bye trip!
(Bye Trip!)
I don't think I'm here either... Sorry! *hugs*
#ChaseForBook9
Okay. I'm wbd
...anyone?
Im here for an hour then leaving
Oh. Hey! Where'd everyone go?
Yeah where did YOU go?
*sighs and opens her book again*
Looking at $2 bill sorry Adra xD i has a looong car trip ahead so
...why would you have a 2$ bill
My friend does
Huh... Okay then. *looks down at the book and frowns* I really want to know what Aretha's done to Nic...
What do you mean? She made a mental link with him! So she could get in his head to stop any name coming out
When-what...
Okay...
*frowns* there's no harm in a back up. Knowing Alastair, he... Oh god... *buries her head in her hands* this could go very very wrong.
It won't if she outsmarts the bastard...I will let Justaria out if I need to. Some of her is mixing with me which isnt good
No, actually.... It isn't.
She might outsmart him, but what if a few team up? A few true names could be enough to break down ANY mental wall
I know but Adra you worry too much. I know you want to think ahead but you're TOO worried
There's no such thing for me. I've learned far too many times that things are rarely okay for long...
Okay I'm just saying...*sighs*
I gtg ttyl wen in SC
Ok. Bye!!!
And I know. But I like having a back up
*sighs and pulls out a sheet of paper* 48 names... Damn.
Adra, are you familiar with henotheism?
#ChaseForBook9
Um... No. What is it?
Talk: you there?
Talking: Yes, I'm still here, and will be for some time. Aretha was held up unexpectedly for several minutes- apologies.
It's a type of religious worship. Monotheism is belief in one God or greater being- for example, Christianity. Polytheism is belief in multiple Gods or deities- for example, ancient Greek mythology. Henotheism is belief in one God represented by multiple images- for example, Hinduism. Though if you ask a Hindu, he or she will claim to be monotheistic. Hindus believe in one greater being they call Brahman. Yet each family worships a separate, smaller representation of Brahman- there is Shiva, the destroyer, Vishnu, the protector, and so on. Each smaller God is merely a piece of the greater being. Although different, they are all parts of one creature. Does that make sense to you?
#ChaseForBook9
Yeah, of course... One of my best friends is Indian and knows about these things...
But-why are you telling me this? I mean, it's very interesting...
Talking: So much great material is coming out of this roleplay, I'm tempted to start writing for it. Like, filling in gaps and things in chapter form. But I feel like that would be really hard to follow, because I would have to say 'takes place in between these events' and since there's no clear archive or breaking point in between things... Ooh, idea! Should I start a blog just to document this roleplay? Like, leave a summary of what happened every day- or, more likely, after every mini-arc, so people can keep up easier?
#ChaseForBook9
I've been tempted to write this out as well. I think it's a great idea!
You could liken that to the... Relationship, if you will, between all of my names. It's all merely different parts of the same whole. I would say we're all the same person, except there isn't a 'we' to speak of. You have to understand that to know why I believe what Aretha's come up with will work.
#ChaseForBook9
Talking: Oh, awesome! Ok, since you've been tempted to write it out, too- how about adding on to the idea for a bit? I'll document each mini-arc as it comes, then since it'll all be broken up neatly, I can add people as contributors and we can all start writing our own chapters, sort of like fillers?
#ChaseForBook9
*frowns* but what if something goes wrong? I don't know what...
Talk: and a few scenes we do from different points of view, the same moment, you know?
Talking: Yes, exactly! Sort of like the roleplay is a movie, and the chapters we add in can be like deleted scenes or commentaries! Ok, I'll get started with that now, so I'll be distant.
#ChaseForBook9
Talking: okay
*goes to the fireplace and curls up into a chair, with a blanket. She goes over her notes*
The link that Aretha and I now share allows us to act almost as moderators, if you will, for each other's minds. It is unlike her consciousness being contained inside of mine- more that she can look inside of my mind, sort through it and influence it- from the outside. This gives her the ability to pull weight over any of my names without any of them having the ability to harm her. She also has influence over my emotions- earlier, when Zafira... Well, you know what I'm referring to- Aretha, in essence, stole my discomfort. She grew tense when I did, because we'll feel each other's emotions when they're strong whether we want to or not, but in the end she was actually able to steal the emotions that were bothering me.
If 500 years of life has taught me anything, it's never to take anything for granted. That is inclusive of solutions as well. However, the only problems I can foresee with this are if Aretha is asleep when I lose control, in which case she's certain to wake up rather quickly, anyway- or if she is comatose or dead, neither of which are circumstances I will allow. I understand your concern and respect your desire for a plan B, but I thought you ought to know exactly what Aretha had worked out on her own first.
#ChaseForBook9
Awfully quiet around here tonight, isn't it? *sits by fireplace*
Talking: What should I name the blog?
#ChaseForBook9
You have a point, Niccolo. I trust her to watch your back. But it all of my days, how many people have left me, I've learned that nothing is ever as it seems... I hope nothing happens, I really do... But I can't leave any loose holes.
*nods* yeah. Not that that's exactly a problem, though...
Talking: Blogfighters? I dunno
I respect that, Adra. You are wise to be doing what you are doing, and I have no intentions of stopping you. I told you that because I have found it is exceedingly difficult to defeat an enemy you cannot understand, so if you're going to work out a plan for the worst case scenario, you should know all the facts. Or at least as many as you can. And Aretha and I will be more than willing to help you with this, if you'd like.
#ChaseForBook9
*smiles* thanks...
*purses her lips* how do you steal a name? And what does it do once you have it?
Talking: okay
*frowns* okay. Whatever.
The process by which I steal names... It is difficult to explain, to say the least. I don't know that I can explain it exactly. Hm... I suppose I could say that, in essence, what I'm doing is opening my own name, and pulling the other inside, if you can grasp that. After I've stolen it, it... Assimilates itself, I suppose you could say. Think of it like adding a middle name. Then another, and so on, until you have 48. Well, it's probably more like adding layers to yourself. If you can make sense of that. It's a rather obscure science, if you can even call it that. This is a poor explanation, but I'm afraid I don't quite know how to make it any clearer.
Talking: Hello/goodbye, Fabienne.
#ChaseForBook9
Talking: Hi/bye, Fabi!! *hugs and waves*
How about just 'A documentation of Blogland roleplay'? That sounds really boring, but I don't know what else to call it...
#ChaseForBook9
Talking: Or 'The Bloglandian's Guide to Roleplay', or something like that?
#ChaseForBook9
Interesting... What does it feel like, then?
Talking: Derek and the RPs? I dunno...
What does it feel like to steal them, or what do I feel like constantly, having stolen so many?
#ChaseForBook9
*ponders* both.
Talk: Blogland's a drug, Fabi. *shrugs* we can't stay away for long.
Talking: How about 'If Roleplay is a Movie...' and then the description would be 'This is the book'? Or maybe 'Roleplay- Behind the Scenes' or something? I dunno, I don't want to make it sound too authoritative, but at the same time I'm not sure what to call it without somehow having the title encompass all of Blogland Roleplaying...
#ChaseforBook9
Talk: Behind the Screens? Idk
Talking: Ugh, those are all really stupid, sorry... How about 'This stupid blog wouldn't give itself a name'?
#ChaseForBook9
Talk: Behind the Screens? Idk
Talking: I meant all the ones I just proposed, not all of yours! Sorry! I just realized that probably sounded bad!
Or 'A nameless attempt to establish some order'?
#ChaseForBook9
Talk:Lol I like that one
Talking: Which one? At this point, I'll call it anything, it just needs a name so I can start posting! I'd even be cool with 'Insert Name Here'!
#ChaseForBook9
Talk: Nameless attempt
Well I'll be off! Bye y'all! Don't start a war without me! :3
Talking: I'm going to post my answer to your question even though you've just left, because you did ask and I'd rather not type all of it again later. Goodbye, Adra.
Well, stealing them... Initially I feel almost empty. Thoughtless, in a way. But I have to be driven by some strong emotion, or I won't be able to actually pull another person's name away. Unsurprisingly, the essence of your being is not all that fond of the idea of leaving your body behind. Afterwards, I usually cease any activity for a few hours or even a few days- however long it takes for me to figure out exactly who I am now that I've added another piece never meant to be part of the puzzle.
As for what it's like constantly... It feels very much as though I am made up of many completely different souls sometimes, even though I am technically no different from any other single person. If you've ever had conflicting desires- perhaps you've promised yourself you would not cry at the ending of a book, and once you reach the end you find yourself in tears, and as tirelessly as you work to force yourself to stop, you cannot... I suppose you could liken it to that. I am constantly at war with myself.
#ChaseForBook9
Talking: Bye Adra! *hugs* Thanks for the help with names!
To anybody else who may appear, I'm probably still lurking about somewhere, just terribly distant, seeing as no one is here and I have a lot of nameless order to establish!
#ChaseForBook9
HELLO!
Awww, almost done... :'(
((DAU! I haven't seen you in ages! D:))
#ChaseForBook9
FABBBIIIII!!!! *supergianthugs*
I MISSED ALL OF YOU.
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