Monday, January 21, 2013

Twitter Rules

Well... that was fun.

My first time on Twitter proved to be something of an avalanche. You know, in a "oh my god run run run" kinda way.

I'll be using it to tell little stories here and there. Some of them will be Skulduggery related, some of them won't- such as the cute little axe murderer story from Saturday night. Some of them may even be related to the series I'll be writing AFTER Skulduggery. Ooooooh! (But I don't know about this. I literally just thought of that right there.)

I'd like to be able to post stories quite regularly, but I'm not committing myself to anything right now. Neither am I going to be using Twitter in the normal way. Instead, I'll be typing with my toes.

No, wait, that's not what I mean. I mean, I have rules. RULES! And they shall not be broken!

RULE 1: I SHALL NOT FOLLOW!

I only follow two people, and both of those just happen to be attractive lady fighters. That's a pure coincidence, I swear.

My point is, I am not going to open up Twitter every day and see a thousand different streams of tweets from a thousand different people. This will EAT UP MY TIME, and I cannot allow this to happen.

RULE 2: I SHALL NOT RETWEET!

I've seen requests for retweets on Ronda Rousey's page, and people actually get annoyed when she doesn't do it. I'm going to cut this off at the knees before it even gets started— no RT's for me.

RULE 3: I SHALL NOT REPLY!

Again, people get annoyed if you don't reply. They think you're being rude or disrespectful. They think you're ignoring them. While all these things are quite true, replying to everyone is just impossible. Also, it will EAT UP MY TIME. And I need my time for doing the thing you want me to do. Which would you rather— that I write more books, or reply to your tweets?

No, I can't do both. I can't. Shush. Shuttup. Stop. You're making this worse. Quiet. Shhhhhhhhhh.

And here it is, the final and most important rule of all.

RULE 4: I RESERVE THE RIGHT TO BREAK ANY OF THESE RULES AT THE SLIGHTEST WHIM.

I have spoken.

4,910 comments:

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Melica Frost said...

Hey guys!

Miss Cain; The Aussie Ninja Stalker said...

HI MEL!

Melica Frost said...

Hey cain! How has everyones day been?

Luciana said...

FLAME ACTION

Miss Cain; The Aussie Ninja Stalker said...

YES.
FLAME ACTION.

My day's been good. :)
Yourself?

Star Inkbright said...

HI MELICA!

*looks at clock*

Alastair Cruciatus said...

I've had a pretty good day thus far. I'm being a nerdy shut-in today. ;)
Hopefully I'll get my work done so I can go ballroom dancing tonight- but I can't count on it. I'd also like to go to my sparring class, but I can't count on that, either, sadly...

Momo said...

I know... it's a bit random...
but...
I can't find this Twitter-page-.-
Can someone help me?

Miss Cain; The Aussie Ninja Stalker said...

YOU GO BALLROOM DANCING?!
I do lessons on Saturdays :)

Miss Cain; The Aussie Ninja Stalker said...

Hi TaNight!
Here: https://twitter.com/DerekLandy

Luciana said...

His @ is @DerekLandy if that's any use to you!:3

Momo said...

@Miss Cain:
Thank you!

Miss Cain; The Aussie Ninja Stalker said...

No prob! :)

Alastair Cruciatus said...

Omygosh, Miss Cain, that's so cool! Which dances are you learning?

Alastair Cruciatus said...

*discreetly mentions that my profile pic is of me and my instructor dancing at my first competition just this Saturday*

Alastair Cruciatus said...

I'll be back- it's time for my second breakfast. Sorry. *poofs*

Miss Cain; The Aussie Ninja Stalker said...

Er, when I go back I'll be learning Silver Star Latin. :D

I don't do competition, but I might. (If I can find a tall enough partner)

Inky Flame said...

hello.... DEREK REPLIED TO MY TWEET!!!!

Miss Cain; The Aussie Ninja Stalker said...

BYE ARETHA!

Miss Cain; The Aussie Ninja Stalker said...

HI CHLOE!

Inky Flame said...

HI CAIN!!

Luciana said...

HELLO CHLOE!

Inky Flame said...

HELLO LUCIANA

Valkyrie V. - Ivy said...

My dream last night involved my stuffed animal hedgehog named Fletcher.


Val: *sees Fletcher on the ground* *frowns* Why is this even here?

Katie: *runs over to Val* Oh, look, he's all dirty. We should probably cover that up.

Val: Or we could just, you know, wipe it off...

Katie: NO! We must cover it! With... A TATTOO!

Val: Wait, what?

Katie: *snatches it away and put a fruit stamp on it* *chucks it at Val* All better!

Val: What the heck?

Peren: *walks in the room, but instead of how he normally is, he's really fat and has a mustache* I WILL NOT TOLERATE THIS! NO DATING BOYS WITH TATTOOS! FLETCHER, LEAVE!

Val: Wtf?

Fletcher: *does nothing, because he's a stuffed animal*

Peren: I AM TIRED OF THIS DISRESPECT! FLETCHER, YOU ARE NEVER TO COME BACK! DO YOU UNDERSTAND!

Fletcher: *does nothing*

Peren: DON'T YOU SASS ME! LEAVE!

Katie: *picks up Fletcher and throws him out the door* AND STAY OUT!

Peren: *turns to Val* GO TO YOUR ROOM!

Val: You aren't my dad!

Peren; I DON'T CARE! GOOOOOO!


And apparently, that's what happens when I fall asleep.

Star Inkbright said...

*laughs*

Why aren't my dreams that fun? XD

Valkyrie V. - Ivy said...

That was one of my NORMAL dreams...

Melica Frost said...

Your dreams seem troubling...

Inky Flame said...

g2g now byii

Unknown said...

Me and Zaf are Dinning at Shenanigans in Lake Harmony. Were on the look out for any remments.

Miss Cain; The Aussie Ninja Stalker said...

BYE CHLOE!
HI VENETTE!

Anonymous said...

Derek's first tweet made me think of my first ever tweet. Well, technically, I didn't, eh, tweet it myself. My friend did. But with my account :L

I'm afraid it's a bit too inappropriate to say what it is . . .

It was funny though! :D

So what's the craic, my fellow readers?! :c)

Melica Frost said...

IM BACK! switched to le laptop because tablet died :D

kingbirdy said...

I know your pain as far as school, Star. It's a national holiday here in the US, but I still have classes. Stupid private school.

Alastair Cruciatus said...

I have finished my second breakfast, and have now returned to speak to you lovely people and probably write more as well!

kingbirdy said...

So how's life as a hobbit, Aretha?

Melica Frost said...

Its pitch black outside ... and cold... WHY?!?

Alastair Cruciatus said...

Not bad, not bad at all. Having a second breakfast is actually quite enjoyable. I highly reccomend it. Though I believe I am a bit taller than usual for a hobbit... My new hobbit neighbors might just kick me out because of it... Also, I have far too many adventures with you people. They find it disturbing. And they don't even know I'm an assasin yet...

Alastair Cruciatus said...

But fitting in with the hobbit community I've just moved into is the least of my worries. I'm currently plotting the ultimate demise of all my MC readers...

Alastair Cruciatus said...

Mel, why is it so dark and cold? Are you still on planet Earth?

Melica Frost said...

Yeah Im just in scotland :(

Valice said...

I NEED TO GET TWITTER...!!!

kingbirdy said...

You can read Derek's twitter without having one yourself.

Alastair Cruciatus said...

I know nothing of twitter...

Melica Frost said...

I have twitter! Twitter is a fun place :D

Star Inkbright said...

*looks at kingbirdy's profile picture* *panics*

*in honour of Pan, of course*

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

Derek I know you Probably are Not looking at this but I would Like to ask you ONE question. If you want to answer me please email stiltskinbrave@gmail.com. I would really appreciate it. THanks. im only 10 but that dosnt stop me from reading youre books.

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

I think i deserve it seen as you came to EVERY PROVINCE EXCEPT CONNAGHT

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

Ok brave dont get mad..... Hooo...hooo..hooo....Omg Guys I am AWESOME! I cannot beleive im just after noticing that! it was there the whole time! HAAHHAH! Someone shoudl draw I am awesome ON my back! YAY! Derek I hope youre Not busy... COME ON PLEASE. I have NEVER ever NEVER ever( I sound like taylor swift) Have never talked to you. Do a ten year old a favour... TALK? or if I am not on when You are on then you can email me. I would like TAHT alot. Someone mationed you on the RTE news BTW.

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

I sound liek teh crazed fan that i really AM! wow! If you are reading THIS comment and not the other ones look above you! Not at the celing.... I'm Not there.....Or am I.... Nope You cant shadow walk to DUBLIN!

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

Im panicking myself now.. MUST EAT ORANGE CHOCOLATE

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

THAT CHOCOLATE WAS NUMMY

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

I am talking to meself!

kingbirdy said...

Brave... Please stop.

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

You silly frube! *tackles frube to ground with fork* OPEN YO DEFORMED YOUGERT

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

YOU DFORMED YOUGERT... I mean

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

Lol a frube is a deformed yougert! its a tube not a tub!

Luciana said...

*laughs* Panicking in the name of Pan! Brilliant! *laughs again*

Ieni Strider (Ieni The Ninja Aeroplane, Eater of Fabi's armses) said...

Yellows?
I just found out I know a Blog person in real life.
I knew she adores Skulduggery Pleasant, but I didn't know she wrote on the blog.

Robin Snowscar said...

Love the rules Derek! *shakes head*

Noelle said...

ROBIN. JOIN US ON SKYPE

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

Im going mad

Ieni Strider (Ieni The Ninja Aeroplane, Eater of Fabi's armses) said...

Uh oh. Skype party. Where everyone disappears and I'm left on my larry.

Melica Frost said...

DAMMIT ROBIN YOU BROKE MY FACEBOOK.

Robin Snowscar said...

Okay Adra.
Why Brave?
Come on Skype then Ieni.

Robin Snowscar said...

*Laughs at Mel*

This is what you get for starting off this Belieber thing xD

Ieni Strider (Ieni The Ninja Aeroplane, Eater of Fabi's armses) said...

That's the point - I can't - no webcam.
Doesn't matter though, it's all good:)

Noelle said...

we don't use webcams. just voices. :D

Ieni Strider (Ieni The Ninja Aeroplane, Eater of Fabi's armses) said...

That's not going to work either D:
DAMN THIS COMPUTER *kills*

Robin Snowscar said...

*frowns at Ieni*

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

Omg I wrote about woolington today

Robin Snowscar said...

Woolington?

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

OK everyone PLEASE email me. I wanna get yere emails so I have them.

Ieni Strider (Ieni The Ninja Aeroplane, Eater of Fabi's armses) said...

I'm being frowned at now, this is worrying...
Okay, I'll try and set a Skype up and see if hell breaks loose on the computer...

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

Woolington! Bloglands pet sheep! Dont you know!

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

You see he was born here in blogland. Do ye all except him?

Flame Phoenix (Fawkes)~roleplaying said...

*flicks Brave*

Lord Vlaedr said...

Hello everyone! Goodbye everyone!

I just fought off a sweaty, 90 kg steroids-man and I am ever-so-slightly achy.

MY PASTA CALLS.

Robin Snowscar said...

Brave - what's your email

Flame Phoenix (Fawkes)~roleplaying said...

Hi/Goodbye, Lord Vlaeder!



Hello, Robin.

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

You better.

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

stiltskinbrace@gmail.com

Robin Snowscar said...

Hello Luciana

Flame Phoenix (Fawkes)~roleplaying said...

Robin, get the skypanians over here.

Robin Snowscar said...

Why?

Look on email Flame!

Noelle said...

WHATCHOO WANT FLAME

Robin Snowscar said...

Email address don't work Brave O.o

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

I feel like PUKING

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

omg soz! ITS stiltskinbrave@gmail.com

Noelle said...

What is GOING ON

Robin Snowscar said...

Adra - Skype wants to be Skrillex

Bexter Vex said...

Guess who's back?

Luciana said...

BECKLES, I HAVE FINALLY FOUND A THINGY TO PUT THAT L CHARM THING ON

its purteh

Robin Snowscar said...

Hai Becky

Flame Phoenix (Fawkes)~roleplaying said...

I want to be less lonely!

Robin Snowscar said...

Emaaaaaaaail.

Noelle said...

D'awww Flame :P

Mary Contrary said...

Derek, I have one thing, above all, to say:
You make a brilliant teen-aged girl.

I can imagine you had quite the fun with THAT particular story. :P

In any case, I look forward to your future tweets and stories and whatnot.

And, finally, while your rules are understandable, I'd like to request that you DO at least consider typing with your toes.
You have to admit, it'd be fun.

Good day to you, sir, and to the People Of Blogland. ^-^
*nods and slips away into the snow/ice/general-weather-mess.

Noelle said...

TAIAIAIAIAIAAIAIAIAIAIA!!!!!

Robin Snowscar said...

Oooh Taia, haven't seen you in a long time

Anonymous said...

yes, those tweets were quite weird, in a hyperventilating-panic-attack kinda way >_<

Flame Phoenix (Fawkes)~roleplaying said...

Taia! *grabs her legs*

Robin Snowscar said...

*taps foot*

Luciana said...

PEOPLE!

Hai.

*can't be bothered to say hello individually because lazy*

Anonymous said...

Anyone here on Wattpad? :]

I just ate a BAGEL! It made me feel so American . . . .

BUT I'M IRISH! :D

And half-Thai.

Which makes me Half-Asian.

It was a nice bagel :c)

Robin Snowscar said...

Luciana *nods*

Anonymous said...

hi everyone :)


I have a music assessment tomorrow. I should practice. Huh, yeah right...

Robin Snowscar said...

Hey Luna, what instrument do you play?

Anonymous said...

*hums misguided ghosts*

Anonymous said...

Piano, preparatory level 'cuz I suck :(
Probably something to do with my fear of practice...

Mary Contrary said...

*slips back in again*

I think I can stick around, for a while.
Maybe.

Hello, good people.

Robin Snowscar said...

Fear of practice?

TAIA

Charisma Thorne said...

I ALMOST HAVE NATASHA ROMANOV HAIR

ONE OR TWO MORE DYES SHOULD DO IT

I AM LOKI OF ASGARD

I AM IN AN AVENGERS MOOD

Hello!

Anonymous said...

Music is cool. Eh, of course.

Besides randomly commenting on this wonderful blog, I am currently mxing some songs together and translating them to Irish for a talent show my youth club is hoping to enter :]

If we somehow finish in a good place we get MONEY! :D

Robin Snowscar said...

Hi Charisma.

I've a headache. I'm going to go. Bye.

Bexter Vex said...

I'm now watching the Avengers and drawing Harmpine. Yay me.

Bexter Vex said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

Im such an idiot

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

Hi all

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

Lol

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

I am soooo bad at drawing.

Cat said...

Nice name, Stiltskin... ehm...
Ulchabha'n Stiltskin Brave. How are you?

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

Don't worry... Be happy

Cat said...

Are you really, though?

Star Inkbright said...

Hi people!

Sorry, first I was writing an MC post and chatting on Skype, then I was chatting on Skype and spamming my MC post with comments coz I'm that sad . . .

Oh yeah - I POSTED AN MC POST!!!!! :)

Anonymous said...

[Laughs at Star]

[Eats chocolate ice cream]

Kilandra Xyle said...

DEREK! Will you be posting these stories on the blog? I don't have a twitter :(

Cat said...

Hi Fabi.
Hello Kilandra Xyle.

Star Inkbright said...

My churchy Christmas song got RECOGNISED, OMGG.

Anonymous said...

Hi, Cat!
Sorry, I'm not here right now, I just had to read Star's post, and now I have to go again...
Bye!

Anonymous said...

Star:
, /

Star Inkbright said...

*glares at Fabi* *throws chocolate ice cream at Fabi's head*

Cat said...

Nice job, Ink.

Star Inkbright said...

THANK YOU, CAT! :)

Fours! :(

Luciana said...

Sorry I keep disappearing!

Internet is going funny:/

Also, Ninja Assassin, Unknown or Stardust?

Kilandra Xyle said...

Hi Cat! You can call me Andra if you'd like. :)

Cat said...

Hello Luciania.

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

AHH

Cat said...

What's wrong, Ulchabha'n Stiltskin Brave?
What should I call you know?

Cat said...

I can't beleive this.

Cat said...

ehm

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

Gotta go

Cat said...

Oh... see you...

Melica Frost said...

Hey guys :D

Alastair Cruciatus said...

Hello everyone! Sorry for vanishing earlier- I realized I had forgotten my hankerchief, and had to leave Blogland to go get it. How is everyone? *wanders over to MC*

Cat said...

Hello Melica Frost. How are you feeling?

Kilandra Xyle said...

Hey Mel!

Luciana said...

Hello Mel.

...You ok, Cat?

Cat said...

Hello Aretha Tesla... Tesla as in Nikola Tesla?

Melica Frost said...

Im...good ? You?

Cat said...

Not Great, Luciania... I've been stuck with writer's block for over a month now... just started feeling like doing SOMETHING. and of course, the story I want to write just deleted itself from my computer and I lost the notebook.

But How are you, Luciana?

Unknown said...

Derek Landy = lunatic :)

Cat said...

And that, Rhian Hooper, is why we love him.

Eli (Ulcabhán) Brave said...

Bub bye

Luciana said...

Ah... That's not a good thing... :(

I'm sure I'll be fine. :')

Alastair Cruciatus said...

OHMYGOSH CAT YOU KNOW NIKOLA TESLA?!?!?!
I HAVE REASERCHED HIM SINCE THIRD GRADE. HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN MY INSPIRATION. I JUST....
CANNOT PHYSICALLY DESCRIBE HOW MUCH I ADMIRE NIKOLA TESLA.
Seriously. Don't even get me started. I'll talk for hours on end about Tesla. It's gotten to the point where every time I find a new documentary and watch it I get annoyed because I know so much more detail than they cover... Although, there's only so much you can cover in 1-2 hours...

ANYWAY yes, I took his last name... I couldn't help it. He's affected my life so much, really.
I'm assuming, since you brought him up, you know who he is?

Alastair Cruciatus said...

Sorry about your story, Cat... :(

Kilandra Xyle said...

Aertha, you'd get along great with this guy i know then.... interest-wise, personality-wise he's just annoying.

Cat said...

I do know who he is, and have looked himself up quite a bit... not as much as you, Im sure

Cat said...

himself... becasue that makes sense. I have looked him up, is what I meant... So stupid, I am...

Cat said...

Ehm...
(Insert Conversation Starter)

Alastair Cruciatus said...

Well just the fact that you've done any reaserch is impressive- most people don't even know who he is. It's kind of depressing, actually... But that's really cool!

Cat said...

This will not be very pleasant if I am the only one here, wallowing in self-pity alone... Those of you who know me all know how I like wallowing in self-pity...

Cat said...

He was brilliant- much, much more brilliant than anyone gave him credit for... people were far too busy in adoration of Edison at the time... such a shame.

Luciana said...

Sorry...

I'm not in a very talkative mood...

Cat said...

Why me?

Cat said...

Nor am I , Luciana...
Im really in a listening mood, but no one is talking

Luciana said...

I'm not really in a mood for conversing at all...

I'm just here because it's sometimes best for me to be... For myself and for those who sometimes need me.

Cat said...

Anyone have any fanfics that I could read?

Cat said...

Or any stories at all?

Im just here to listen... Im not really needed at all, and unless anyone is saying anything it makes me feel worse...

Alastair Cruciatus said...

Back! Sorry, I'm flitting in and out- kind of distant. But yes, Tesla was brilliant. Also, I hate Edison... A lot... Like, really a lot... I dunno, I know it's bad to hold a grudge, but I can't help it, and it makes me really sad/angry every time I see or read something praising him...

barmybex said...

Derek - you should reply to tweets! Was a great start to a story though.

I'm coming to the event on 20th Feb and looking forward to the signing in MK in April. Do I sound like a stalker? :P

Hello to everyone else! :D How's it going?

Cat said...

Some people thought that Tesla was ssent from space, or the future...

Cat said...

Hello barmybex.

barmybex said...

Hi Cat *waves*

Alastair Cruciatus said...

Once he claimed that he actually revieved a radio transmission from space- no one believed him, of course.

Star Inkbright said...

Sorry I've been so distant. First I was commenting on my MC post, Skyping and emailing Lavender.

Scáth, can I climb back in your head and steal your speech skills? I know where your skills are now and I neeeeeeeed them. :(

Luciana said...

I'm terrible with speeches...

Star Inkbright said...

You are NOT. :)

Hey, I figured out how to end speeches! Say you're really sorry but you have to go now!

Unfortunately, it was true, so I'm really sorry, but I have to go now! :(

Anonymous said...

I am back, distantly. Writing a comeback chapter for the MC

If anyone doesn't know what that is,
mevolentminions.blogspot.com

It ROCKS! (It had better, 'cause I'm in it!)

Bye, Star! I know you left, like 10 minutes ago, but oh well.

Hi, anyone who is still here!

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

GAAAAH!!!!!! Now i CANT meet Derek in Derry because stupid drama from 9-3:30 and of COURSE i'd be home far to late

Alastair Cruciatus said...

Ok, I'm poofing now- dinner time. Sorry guys. :(
If anybody feels like reviewing my MC chapter... Go ahead... :)

Anonymous said...

Hi, Zaf. Sorry to hear that. :-(

Anonymous said...

Hi/Bye Aretha!

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

Im destined to never meet him I really am

Willow Storm said...

Is any of you chickens here?

Cat said...

Zafira... derek's coming here?

Anonymous said...

America is so unfortunate that way...:-(

Cat said...

Hellow Willow Storm. How are you?

Anonymous said...

Hello Willow.

I don't know about chickens, but an owl is here.

Anonymous said...

Hello again, Cat.

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

May i please expkode someone?

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

Uno?

Willow Storm said...

I'm ok, Cat. How about you?

Cat said...

My chickens are outside, I am afriad. Feel free to explode me. How could you meet him, Zafira?

Anonymous said...

I would rather not be exploded, thank you very much.

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

I dedicate this page to technolgy. It is helpful especially IF i get to meet Derek from Skype which would be awesome

Cat said...

Candidly speaking, Willow Storm... not well. At all. At all, at all.

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

Cat- NJ is going to Skype me at the signing but if she goes March 9th I cant meet him

Cat said...

Oh... that has to hurt...

Zanida Laufeydottir Queen of Asgard (Zafira Kerias) said...

No kidding.

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