Monday, February 7, 2011

The Jitter Girls


Ah, the Jitter Girls.

They’re quite scary, you know. Scary and unstoppable. Or maybe more creepy than scary. But unstoppable. Definitely unstoppable.

I came up with the Jitter Girls as part of a script that never got made. In fact, it was this same script in which I came up with the idea for the Cleavers, as well. That script had a whole load of ideas, but unfortunately it just wasn’t very good. All these madcap ideas didn’t cohere into anything resembling sense, so I abandoned the script and started cannibalising my own stuff, taking what worked and using it somewhere else.

Which is why I’m writing about the Jitter Girls, ten years after coming up with them.

January was, basically, a month writing various short stories and whatnot. I had reached the halfway point of Book Six, and was quite comfortable with taking a few weeks off to get some other work done. Well, now I’m back at it, and I needed a new threat for the middle section and I was searching through this magnificent mind of mine and those creepy ol’ Jitter Girls just jumped right out at me.

I knew I’d get to use them, sooner or later.

I’m not going to tell you much about them, other than that they are currently giving Skulduggery and Valkyrie quite a hard time. I haven’t a clue how they’re going to be defeated, either. The way I’m writing right now, it looks like the Jitter Girls are going to kill our heroes and skip off into the darkness. Which, you know, would be bad for the rest of the book.

Oh dear. I seem to have written myself into a proverbial corner.

I should probably get back to work.


4,087 comments:

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Crescent said...

launches herself at a clone and tumbles, pushes it onto its back, puts its arm into a police lock, choves it upwrds making the shoulder dislocate. Grabs another clone and repeats this action*

GenesisAggelos said...

Octa - Im aware of that :p But chances are Im smarter so I still reign supreme! In fact Im here to....

Dragona - I will take back my throne. For years I had complete dominion... silently watching over you all but never participating! I remember when there were only three Skulduggery fan arts on DA! When there was only one item on fan fiction.net! I am the silent guardian and I shall not be dethroned! (for those who were wondering, my name is actually a subtle reference to this!)

Dragona Pine said...

Brb.


Clones, protect my place.


*Dragona clones march up and form a ring around the throne, anyone who uses violence will be shot on sight*

Nicole Fudge (Nicolette Croga) said...

*eyes glow red*

Assuming direct control

*harbinger the reaper gains control of nicolettes body*

Resistance is futile wewill find another way *hurls a biotic ball at crescent*

GenesisAggelos said...

*begins to scheme.

COMRADES! A CALL TO ARMS! We will not let Dragona come to the throne and interfere with the peace that currently settles over Derek Blogsville! WHOS WITH ME?

Dragona Pine said...

Cresent, now you will be executed.


*puts her before a firing squad*


Brb.

Dragona Pine said...

*laughs*


Genesis. Accept my rule and no harm will come to you... if not...


*gestures towards the millions of Dragona-clone-troopers*

You will die.

Nicole Fudge (Nicolette Croga) said...

*turns to genesis*

This hurts you

*fires biotics at her*

*stalks over to her immune to attack*

(inside nicolettes head) aw damn I'm a reaper puppet *plays chess with herself*

Dragona Pine said...

Lol hi Kallista!


*uses magic yorkshire pudding to heal her*

GenesisAggelos said...

Dragona - Bring it. "/

Nicole Fudge (Nicolette Croga) said...

Wants to say hey to Kallista but reaper won't let her

*sulks*

Dragona Pine said...

Very well Genesis.


*Dragona-clone-troopers fire on Genesis, killing her before she can blink, let alone move*

Nicole Fudge (Nicolette Croga) said...

Checkmate!
No I have checkmated you
But it was my go!
No it was my go!

*Nicolette fights with herself inside her head as the reaper continues to kill people with her body*

Octa said...

We shall stand against Dragona for freedom, honour, marshmallows!

WE WILL NEVER SURRENDER!

Dragona Pine said...

*Octa gets carried away by clones*

GenesisAggelos said...

Hey Kallista...

Choose your side but do it quickly!

Dragona Pine said...

*Dragona lets Kallista back in and uses his magic yorkshire pudding to rip the reaper out of Nicolette and kill it*

Crescent said...

Cresent: "Never! The blog is a place free of rule! The only person who reighns here is our golden god!!!" *Is wearing a black necromancer ring, and with it shoots vines of darkness and shadow at the army approaching her, sweeping them out of the way* "Their numbers are to much!! Time to call reinforcements! Rowan! Sinder! Get yo ass in here!" *Rowan and Sinder arrive and join the fight, fighting there hardest. Rowan cracks open the ground upon which clones are standing causing them to fall into the mantle. Sinder is sending daggers of shadow firing at them, and Rowan throws fire down at them. But it is to no avail, their numbers only lessen by a few hundred wich is nothing.*
"Fine, Piney, FINE! But before i surrender, I would like to propose. To propose a deal. I'll call off my to friends here, and i won't trouble you, if you let me rule with you. King and Queen, or what-evs. I have skill, and good friends with connections and knowledge. I can help you, not that you need it, but...whaddaya say?" *reaches out a pale hand with black painted nails, a smile playing on her red lips*

Nicole Fudge (Nicolette Croga) said...

Well I don't know for sure but I'm pretty sure this reaper is fighting for dragona and reapers are tough to kill , please don't try it's using my body after all … stupid thing

*Nicolette who I thought i had defeated grabs Nicolette by her hair and drags her back into the fight*

Dragona Pine said...

*the apparantly "dead" clones stand up and get back into formation*


Cresent, I was thinking on having Kallista as my queen, if she so accepts. You can be a general.

GenesisAggelos said...

*as if Im going to get struck down by clones.

*stands straight back up whilst Dragona has her back turned and walks calmly through the violence.








*stops directly behind Dragona and draws her gun, aiming it into the small of Dragona's back.
















Checkmate.

Nicole Fudge (Nicolette Croga) said...

*reapor is ripped from me*

Yeah! *goes to celebrate but gets hit by a dragona clone

Hey I was fighting with you!

*clone hits me again*

That's it *throws clone across the room with her biotics and a group of dragona clones turns and come at her*

No fair 1 against 20 and I'm not idrestructable!

Dragona Pine said...

*laughs at Cresent*


Shoot me... go on SHOOT ME!


*clones point their guns at her*


You won't get out of here alive... but I will.

Dragona Pine said...

*uses magic yorkshire pudding to bring Kallista back to life*




Hey, you upsetted the clones Nicolette...

GenesisAggelos said...

*disappears suddenly into a cloud of smoke... leaving everyone lost and confused.

Octa said...

*Octa spies the clones approaching*

*mutters under his breath*

*clones collapse as their brains implode due to the sheer horror of Octa's whisphered words*

Crescent said...

Kallista! Hi! Don't join piney, he evil! Octa, Genesis, and anyone else with us, we must fight! And if that doesn't work, then im double-crossin y'all to go to Dragonas side ;) But just to annoy dragona even more...*takes out a knife and fork, and does one amazing thing...eats his magic yorkshire pudding...OoO. And piney, you cant say its not the real one, or i didnt really it or anything...NO LOOPHOLES THIS TIME!!!! MWHAHAHA!! I MOCK YOU!

Nicole Fudge (Nicolette Croga) said...

*runs across room screaming *

No fair it started it! *jumps over unconscious dragona clone I threw and send a huge biotic wave at the others who are firing bullets at her*

*clones are send flying in all directions, most are knocked unconscious but some just get up and keep running*

AHH do you never give up! *runs off already tired out by herbiotics keeping up her shield so she isn't hit by bullets*

Dragona Pine said...

*the clones don't move as their brains implode, just raise their guns at Octa*

GenesisAggelos said...

Kallista... Crescent... Fear not... I shall return.

Dragona Pine said...

*laughs at Cresent*


*a yellow light comes from her mouth that she cannot contain, it moves to Dragona's hand and then forms his magic yorkshire pudding again*


Cresent, I already have a safeguard for that...


*she disintergrates*

Darkane Claw said...

YAY! TOP GEAR!

Darkane Claw said...

Hey Dragona

Nicole Fudge (Nicolette Croga) said...

*runs straight into Octa*

Sorry on a run indestructible clones chasing me

* shower of bullets rain around Nicolette*

*biotic barrier fails and bullets can hit her*

AHH damn!

*throws daggers at dragona clones*

*daggers go straight threw there heads and pin them to the floor*

*nicolettes keeps running and her shield is fully charged and she is out of sight by the time the clones free themselves*

Darkane Claw said...

13 Severed Hands! :D

Dragona Pine said...

Clones, Cresent and Genesis.


*they turn their attention towards Cresent and Genesis only*

Octa said...

As the blood will drip from your flaying skin
The snap of bones twisted until they poke through flesh
The dripping of froth, crimson and thick
From decaying wounded lungs
The dark cold clamour of death
Searing through veins like a million rusted needles
The horror of uncomprehenible madness
The staring eyes
The twisted hideous grin
The teacupfuls of brain splattering through empty eye sockets
As the pus drenched eyes bleed sweat and gore

*Octa whispers more to the clones of fire and rage and insanity*

*The whisper continues searing through the minds of the couls, consistant, never stopping*

*Of maimed corpses, loneliness, betryal*

*Of ice and tears and fear*

*Of nightmares, imaginings, terror and despair*

*The clones cannot bear it anymore and collapse to the grounds, ripping at their heads*

Crescent said...

Piney, you can't just say there brains don't implode after octas just written that. He didn't give you permission to edit it. Piney face it, your numbers are lessening, and every time some writes about attacking your clones you cant reverse it. If there brains imploded, the imploded, ok? And if i beat you up, i did? I didn't go flying across the room cos u wrote about a shield AFTER i wrote about beating you up. You cant go changing stuff, its not fair...

Dragona Pine said...

*they stand back up again*

Darkane Claw said...

Lol Top Gear is funny

Octa said...

Clones not couls

Dragona Pine said...

Cresent, my clones are indesturctable, I even SAID they were. Every time you "kill" them, they stand back up. As when you apparantly "knocked me out" I ALWAYS have a shield, as soon as you touched it you went flying across the room... I didn't change it, you should have learned by now, I use it enough.

Darkane Claw said...

Lamborghini!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!






*Sees mass of Dragonas clones* Um........
*drives over them. Car gets stuck* Aw come on!

Darkane Claw said...

MUSE!

Octa said...

*Octa sends a wraith of shadow to contain the clones which sends them into an inpenetrable room*

We're free!

The clones are stuck in the room. For it is impenetrable :D

GenesisAggelos said...

I HAVE RETURNED!

*stands atop a nearby hill with a very heavy silver book in her hands.

Allow me to elaborate on where I have been...

When you need information there is only one place you can go... so I headed straight to Chinas library of course!

I knew straight away what I was looking for. Its a book written in the times of Ancient Rome, by some of the most powerful sorcerers of the time! They call it 'Language of the Machines'. The Roman Machines were a fearsome army of clones, and I immediately recognized them when Dragona revealed them to me!

And so I say to you...

TU QUOD ME INVENTUM GRAVE. ET NEQUAQUAM ULTRA SURGES!

*the clones drop to the ground... completely useless and never to be revived again.

NOW! DRAGONA PINE! IT IS JUST YOU AND I!

Nicole Fudge (Nicolette Croga) said...

*laughs at Kallista giving away her position to the clones*

Ahh I'm on your side!

*clones consider this before firing at my biotic barrier*

*sighs*

I'm tired of running *sits and waits for her barrier to fail her as it gets harder to keep up*

Dragona Pine said...

*uses magic yorkshire pudding to make more clones*


*they overpower everyone and they drop their weapons in surrender*


Unfortunatly guys... me taking over the blog was a joke... and you weren't too hasty to attack your friend. Overall, it went very well.

*holds up paper as it actually says "Derek Landy" as king*

*starts laughing*

Dragona Pine said...

Genesis. Unfortunatly my magic yorkshire pudding is more powerful than anything... ever. So all you've done is... nothing... nothing at all...

Nicole Fudge (Nicolette Croga) said...

*clones drop to ground*

Genesis you saved me!

*goes to hug her*

GenesisAggelos said...

Wait... what?

This is not over Dragona! Joke or not you still struck down my friends :p

Darkane Claw said...

*Locks Dragona in an impenetrable room along with his clones and drops it into the sea*

Crescent said...

Wow octa...Its amazing, and pine, you cant say that nothing happend after what octa's just said it k? Oh and i can't die. Horcuxes. :D

Octa said...

But the clones are all stuck in the impenetrable room where they can live for ever.

Dragona Pine said...

And my clones are still alive... it just shows how loyal you are, doesn't it Genesis?


*uses magic yorkshire pudding to break out of Darkane's room*

GenesisAggelos said...

*accepts Nicolette's hug. All be it grudgingly.

Nicole Fudge (Nicolette Croga) said...

Aw well at least I didn't get killed..

And I didn't attack you dragona! I was helping you and then one of your clones started on me! Only self defence :D

Dragona Pine said...

You can die Cresent if I use my magic yorkshire pudding.

Octa said...

But the room is impenetrable!

Which means not even magic Yorkshire pudding can break out.

Or it wouldn't be impenetrable.

Dragona Pine said...

I agree Nicolette, but Cresent and Genesis aren't loyal friends... they didn't wait too long before trying to beat me and my clones up, but they failed miserably.

GenesisAggelos said...

Dragona - My only loyalty is to Derek Landy and the good ship Ghanith. It would be wise to remember that.

Darkane Claw said...

*Gets an army of INVINCIBLE puppy sized elephants* CHARGE!

Octa said...

Well I have a magic oblong shaped pink frog on a demented stick which is even more powerful than the magic Yorkshire pudding.

*uses it to destroy the pudding*

Nicole Fudge (Nicolette Croga) said...

oh my my mums come upstairs!

I can get a smoothy!

I thought you beat your addiction

I can't

Still keep trying or you never will

I don't want to beside there good

Not to many

Shut up *storms downstairs for smoothy*

Dragona Pine said...

Octa, nothing is immune to my magic yorkshire pudding. It can break any protection and kill anything which is indestructable.

GenesisAggelos said...

Also, theres no such thing as invincible. Even Skulduggery can die. You point... it is invalid.

Ricardo Doom said...

People people calm please. The brambo master has arrived. Autographs to my left. Photos to my right.

Dragona Pine said...

Octa, I don't care if it's a joke or not, it is my policy that once someone makes something LIKE my magic yorkshire pudding, I leave... and I don't want to leave...

Dragona Pine said...

*rolls eyes*

Genesis, my magic yorkshire pudding is indestructable. It doesn't use the same magic as SP, it's one of a kind. You can't compare it to anything.

Ricardo Doom said...

*Forms a herd of Killer Kowals to attack the herd of Puppy Elephants, for Narnia and for Aslan*

Crescent said...

NU-UH! MAGIC YORKSH WHAT EVER! HORCRUXES WILL RULE! YOU CANT KILL ME! And now i vanish all your clones using a vanishing spell, where they are in limbo or non_being, which means i didn't kill, them, i just sent them somewere else! *stick tounge out at dragona*

Nicole Fudge (Nicolette Croga) said...

My biotic is indestructible

As it is dark energy and energy can neither be created or destroyed

My biotics are incredible powerful but I can only use lots of power at a time as it's very tiring

Octa said...

But I say that my frog is more powerful.

For I spoke and it was.

My point is that its unfair to have an object to win everything. It's also unimaginative.

And why should you decide that my frog is less powerful :D

Ricardo Doom said...

I stand with Dragona. I like yorkshire puddings, especially with gravy.

GenesisAggelos said...

Dragona - No.

Dragona Pine said...

Indestructable to all but my magic yorkshire pudding Nicolette.

Octa said...

But energy can be transformed :D

Dragona Pine said...

Guys, just calm down. It was a joke and you're all getting stressed.

Genesis, accept my magic yorkshire pudding. If you don't accept it, you don't accept me and that isn't good for both me and you.

Octa, I use it for good only. Everyone has accepted it, I took over the blog for a joke and everyone's getting stressed about it and arguing.

TIF News Desk said...

I've got my fingers crossed for a Jitter Girls killing spree to a Wham! soundtrack here...just me?

I asked before but I'm guessing you didn't see or had no info but do you know anything about books 4 & 5 and their publishing in America?

Oh and if anyone's interested I wrote a review of Skulduggery #1 on my blog, click through if you fancy a read.

Ricardo Doom said...

Dragona Killer Kowala land pledges it's troops.

And on this day, on peanut hill, that Kowals did do battle. With liquorish spears and hearts of gold, they charged forward without fear.

GenesisAggelos said...

Octa - Im siding with you. Having a so called 'indestructable' object is just unfair and ridiculously unimaginative.

Dragona Pine said...

*uses magic yorkshire pudding to move the sharks away from Kallista*

Ricardo Doom said...

Koala's shall triumph Argh Rice Farmers. Why won't someone acknowledge that I'm here.

Darkane Claw said...

Going to look at it now Alex.





















It's weird spelling Alix with an e.

Octa said...

Why are you allowed an object that we cannot beat so that you win at everything?

Nicole Fudge (Nicolette Croga) said...

Yes energy can be transformed and that's a biotics weakness :D

Everything must have a weakness , just don't go spreading mine around :D

Octa said...

I know that you use it for good Dragona.

But if you can have one then why can't we all?

Crescent said...

Ok, thats it!! IM SICK AND TIRED OF YOUR STUPID ASS PUDDING! THERES NO STORY OR ANYTHIG TO SOMETHING THATS INDESTRUCTIVE, SO WHATS THE POINT OF US DOING THIS LITTLE ROLEPLAY LIKE THING IF PINEYS JUST GONNA CHANGE EVERYTHING WE DO!SO IM LEAVING!! IF ANYONE WANTS TO MEET UP AT ANOTHER BLOG, I'LL SEE THEM THERE!! HMPH! *turns around sharply, her hair whipping around her, darkness and anger emanating from her every pore, and stomps of angirly*

GenesisAggelos said...

Brambo - BRB shooting Dragona down.


Dragona - No such thing as invincible. End of story.

Nicolette - Dont worry we shall tell no one! :L

Dragona Pine said...

Right. Guys. Listen up. I have had my magic yorkshire pudding ever since I've been. I used it for a reason to heal people. Up to this stage, everyone has accepted it, I use it for good. If you disagree with it, you disagree with me which probably means I'm leaving. I don't want to leave, I have a fiancee who I wish to get married to, so just please accept it, stop arguing against me, and carry on as normal.

Octa said...

MINE!!!

Ricardo Doom said...

And as the might of the elephant puppies came down upon the koalas they bravely stood, like lions so brave, with only one thing in mind. That wondrous thing, that Yorkshire Pud, that would be so good for this and. So with one last cry of battle spirit their commander led them to battle, and as the last koalas head was ripped of by those mighty, fearless Pups the legacy which belonged to Koalas was finally put to an end. :(

Nicole Fudge (Nicolette Croga) said...

I bet Kallista or dragona gets it …

Octa said...

But you don't just use it for good Dragona. You use it to ruin our attempts to try and win.

Now I don't mind you countering our attempts, that's the whole fun but why the same object all the time? Be imaginative.

Crescent please don't leave. I don't want a schism in the blog again.

Crescent said...

X_x

Nicole Fudge (Nicolette Croga) said...

Eats bread humbly

Ricardo Doom said...

People stop and remember now the koalas. So sad that their entralis now decorate the hill. And that they forgot that the puppies where invinceable. Everyone should create an army of cute adorable animals.

Ricardo Doom said...

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GenesisAggelos said...

Why are people saying 'MINE'? *so confused.


GAWD you peeps are little drama queens :L Stop being so miserable dudes. Dragona we dont care if you use it for good or not... its just unfair that we have a whole little roleplay thing and theres no point to it because youre just like 'you cant do this coz all my stuff is indestructable'. Its REALLY annoying so yeah, we're going to argue the point. Its just sucking the fun out of everything!

Also Crescent - Come back and keep smiling :)

Now can we all grow up and be reasonable please???

*one time when my age really shows. Dont make me be mature again!

Nicole Fudge (Nicolette Croga) said...

I already have an army of penguins but they abandoned me for icream

Darkane Claw said...

I'm going now. Night Guys. Talk to you some other time.

Dragona Pine said...

I keep peace with it. It is something I use and I will not stop. Accept it please. Cresent, don't leave.
Octa, I use the same object all the time because it shows who I am. Magic yorkshire pudding IS original, I'm from yorkshire and it's something which defines it. I'm not going to stop using it, so just please accept it and move on.

Octa said...

We don't object to you taking over the blog. it's fun. But we object to having no means to beat you because you have the ultimate object.

It's no fun otherwise. We object to the loss of our fun.

Anonymous said...

Alright.
I'm really lost >.<
Something about pudding, dragona, and penguins.

Ricardo Doom said...

Genesis what shall your army be, a band of sabre toothed hedgehogs, or a squadron of poisonus chinchillas?

GenesisAggelos said...

Octa - Seconded

GenesisAggelos said...

Brambo - Hedgehogs allllllllllll the way!

Ricardo Doom said...

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Octa do you like my koala battle poetry? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dragona Pine said...

GUYS! ACCEPT MY MAGIC YORKSHIRE PUDDING. IF I SEE ANYONE OVERNIGHT ARGUING AGAINST IT THEN I'LL LEAVE WITH NO WARNING. IT'S PART OF WHO I AM AND I'M NOT GOING TO STOP USING IT. IT'S INDESTRUCTABLE AND ALL THE OTHER THINGS, AND I'M NOT GOING TO STOP USING IT. ACCEPT IT OR I'M LEAVING AND THAT'S FINAL!

*hugs Kallista*


I g2g now... night all...


*hugs Flo*


Night...

Anonymous said...

*Hums to self Electro World by Perfume*

Mary Hiashi said...

...How about this Derek? Someone...I don't know who...Hires me to assassinate Valkyrie...And then...I come across them and hate them almost immediately whereupon I decide to kill them and say to hell with the hiree's money. I will accomplish killing one (let's say there are 2) and the other gets off alive. I then swear my revenge and so does the escaped Jitter girl, and I fade into the night? (By the way, I kill the one Jitter Girl with an ice pick to the brain...for some odd reason.)

I think that's golden...

Nicole Fudge (Nicolette Croga) said...

I gottago as this iPod is nearly as flat as a pancake , night!

Ricardo Doom said...

Genesis the koalas have risen from the grave and shall do battle against your treachorus hedgehogs. Un gaurd

GenesisAggelos said...

Dragona - Does it count if we accept the pudding but not the indestrucability? Or how about we accept both but ignore the said indestructability and destroy it anyway?

Ricardo Doom said...

Hi Mary, has been far to long.

Octa said...

I'm not saying that it's not original. It is. But not every time. And not when it's invincible.

Everything needs a weakness. Otherwise there would be no stories.

Imagine if Derek landy used it.

Skulduggery and Valkyrie are fighting to the death against the Facelees Ones. Most have been banished to the deep yellow portal.

Skulduggery was just about to banish the final Faceless One when it took out its magic Yorkshire pudding and disintegrated Skulduggery. There was nothing Skulduggery could do as it was invincible.

Oh cr** said Skulduggery. I'll just disintegrate then.

And the Faceless Ones ruled the earth.

It's not any fun!

Anonymous said...

*Pancake-dances on ceiling*

Hmmm... Haven't seen Jaffa around lately...

Mary Hiashi said...

...And just for kicks...

37 Things to do in an Elevator
1. Crack open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2. Stand silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5. Meow occasionally.
6. Stare at another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM!" - and back away slowly.
7. Say "DING!" at each floor.
8. Say "I wonder what all these do?" and push all the red buttons.
9. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10. Stare grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12. Try to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15. As you are coming to the end of the journey, get emotional and have a group hug. Tell them that you will never forget them.

16. Ask if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17. Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20. Pretend you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
21. Swat at flies that don't exist.
22. Call out "Group hug!" then enforce it.
23. Make car race noises when someone gets on or off.
24. Congratulate all for being in the same lift with you.
25. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"
26.Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
27. While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!" then whistle innocently.
28. Let your cell phone ring - don't answer it.
29. Walk into the lift and say "This reminds me of being buried alive. Ah, those were the days..."
30. Take shoes off before entering. Then look shocked and disgusted when the others don't.
31. Ask people which floor they want, say in 'Who want to be a millionaire' style is that your final answer.
32. Also in your bellboy act, ask what floor they want. Whatever they say, give them a glare and say "you should be ashamed of yourself!", and leave the lift tutting.
33. Ask, "Did you feel that?"
34. Tell people that you can see their aura.
35. When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."
36. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
37. Dress up in a long, black cloak with a hood, stare and in a deep voice announce "It is time..."

Ricardo Doom said...

*Squad of Koala Commandos leap on the rear end of the hedgehog battalion ripping them to pieces* Your move Genisis

Crescent said...

Ok, ok, Im here.*Scowls* But im not sure i accept it. But if your pudding defines you cos your from yorkshhire, why cant i have a four leafed clover cos im from and live in Ireland. Also sorry for being drama queen ( I probably get it from my bro) but i have an extremely short temper, and am volatile and get angry easily. *looks away sheepishly*

Mary Hiashi said...

Hi. I beg pardon but I have to go.

Blessed be,
Miss Mary Hiashi

GenesisAggelos said...

Kallista - I like the phrase Drama Peasant :L:L:L That made me giggle.

Mary - We have never met! Which is odd because I have heard so much about you but never had the opportunity to chit chat! Greetings :)

Brambo - Give me a sec, Im trying to fit them with little hedgehog sized helmets.

Anonymous said...

kono michi wo hashiri susumi susumi susumi *tsuzuketa*
chizu ni kaite aru hazu no machi ga miataranai
furi kaeru to soko ni miete ita keshiki ga kieta
kono sekai boku ga saigo de saigo saigo da
electro world jimen ga furuete kudaketa sora no taiyou ga
ochiru boku no te ni hirari to

hontou no koto ni kizuite shimatta no
kono sekai no shikumi kimi ni tegami nokosu yo

aa aaa aa aaa
aa aaa oh yeh
electro world

machi yuku neko datte sora wo tonjau machi de
kimi no sonzau sae reality ga nai n da yo

aa aaa aa aaa
aa aaa oh yeh
electro world

mieru mono no subete ga
fureru mono mo subete ga
reality ga nai kedo
boku wa tashika ni iru yo

kono michi wo hashiri susumi susumi susumi suzuketa
chizu ni kaite aru hazu no machi ga miataranai
Find More lyrics at www.sweetslyrics.com
furi kaeru to soko ni miete ita keshiki ga kieta
kono sekai boku ga saigo de saigo saigo da
electro world jimen ga furuete kudaketa sora no taiyou ga
ochiru boku no te ni hirari to

boku no te ni hirari to
(boku no te ni hirari to)
(boku no te ni hirari to)
boku no te ni hirari to
(boku no te ni hirari to)
(boku no te ni hirari to)

kono sekai no suicchi
oshita no wa dare na no
ah ah ah mou sugu
kieru
electro world

Ricardo Doom said...

*Koalas charge in a frontal assault seeing as they specialise in claw to spine combat*

Octa said...

LOL Mary. It's been ages.

Brambo. What koala poetry?

Ricardo Doom said...

*Assists hedgehhogs in fitting helmets*

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

I AM GOING TO RIP MY BOOK TO SHREDS!!

Anonymous said...

*Hums Doll House by KanonxKanon*

Octa said...

Hey Sklugirl!

What's wrong?

GenesisAggelos said...

Brambo - NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! *brings in emergency hedgehog healers.

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

My book is driving me to bits! along with my other daily life

Anonymous said...

How come, Skulgirl?

Ricardo Doom said...

Once I heard an old man say John Kanacka nacka too laa lay
Today today is a holiday John Kanacka Nacka too laa lay
Too laa lay
Too laa lay
John Kanaczk nacka too laa lay

Octa said...

stupid typos!

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

its a very stupid book

Ricardo Doom said...

Koalas retreat as the hedgehogs curl up into balls and roll over them Koala casualties=1122
Hedgehog casualties=1123

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

ummmm Brambo whats with the Koalas???

Octa said...

Umm.. I'm not going to make Dragona leave am I?

Only when I started to post my story Dragona hadn't posted his yet.

GenesisAggelos said...

Octa -

~~~

I’m not going to tell you much about them, other than that they are currently giving Skulduggery and Valkyrie quite a hard time. I haven’t a clue how they’re going to be defeated, either. The way I’m writing right now, it looks like the Jitter Girls are going to kill our heroes and skip off into the darkness. Which, you know, would be bad for the rest of the book.


Oh dear. I seem to have written myself into a proverbial corner.


I should probably get back to work.

~~~

LOL you really are all wise :L I commend you comrade! Also one last point - not even the great Golden God likes that which is indestrucable. GOLDEN GOD HATH SPOKEN!

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

what are you talking about Octa?

Ricardo Doom said...

The koalas thought they had won the fight, and proven to all that they had true might, but then the hedgehogs poisoned spikes stuck out against their soft warm hinds, they squealed and fell as the poison spread, until many, too many, lay down dead

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

DFONT SAY CCOMRADE!!! *starts hyperventalating*

flaring rhythm said...

Derek, you have no idea how much I'm NOT going to sleep tonight. I'm seriously scared now.

YOU HAS SCARED ME, DEREKZ.

I'm scared of the scary peoples :'{






Thanks, Derek, now I'll have to sleep with a damned SPATULA under the pillow to attack people with O_o

LOVE YOU! :D
Flarin'
x

Anonymous said...

What's wrong with the story?
I bet it's amazing though >.>

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

hi kallista *manages to say while hyperventilating*

Ricardo Doom said...

Skulgirl don't dis those brave Koalas they have more value than you.. They shall come in the night and rip you to pieces. *Lets out a slightly mad laugh*

Crescent said...

LMAO LOL ROFL LMBO HAHAHAHA!! OMG THOSE ELEVATOR THINGS ARE SOOO FUNNY! HEEHEEEHEEHEEHHEEHEHE!!! YOU CRACK ME UP!

Ricardo Doom said...

Hello flaring rhythm Koalas attack

Octa said...

There's nothing wrong with the story.

It's just when we were arguing over the yorkshire pudding, I wrote a short, slightly sarcastic story to back up my point.

The post took a while to write and before I posted Dragona wrote that if we continued to argue against the pudding he would leave.

Anonymous said...

lmfao Kallista xD

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

NO IT woNT this d**ned book is driving me to PEICES!! along with the fact that i have learned at the orthadontist today that i will get at least one tooth pulled if not three teeth pull :S

GenesisAggelos said...

Brambo - I call peace time! Death is not a good thing :'( I call for peace and cake! *tis quite literally a situation of cake or death

Anonymous said...

Ouch Dx

Octa said...

I choose cake please!

Lol Eddie Izzard.

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

yes i have NEVER gotten any teeth pulled that werent ready to fall out i dont like needles *shivers*

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

thanks kallista

Octa said...

I had 4 teeth pulled out :(

Ricardo Doom said...

I'm now writing the epic of peanut hill

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

ouch i still have five baby teeth left almost ALL of my friends have no more baby teeth and have already had or have braces im gonna have them in high school!!!

GenesisAggelos said...

Skulgirl - Ouch :/ Bad times :(

Octa - Sugar I forgot about him saying that... *awkward. Does it count if I added in 'one last point'? Dragona if you read this... I am an idiot and forget things very easily. My bad.

Anonymous said...

I have to get all 4 wisdom teeth out :x

Octa said...

I was going to do some more poetry but I'm all annoyed now.

Just breathe. Relax. Read Skylara's epic story again.

Ricardo Doom said...

Deep breaths Brambo you are calm

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

*takes her book that is tearing her to shreds rips it to shreds and throws it in a bon fire agressivley*

Anonymous said...

Hey Kallista!
It's okay :P

Anonymous said...

*Catches Skulgirl's book*
*Reverses time*
*Puts it back together*

Crescent said...

I want a fat pony.

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

TAKE THAT YOU GOOD FOR NOTHING BOOK!!!!

GenesisAggelos said...

Octa - Have a hug from me -----> *hugs* I think we're all still trying to calm down a bit.

BRB guys, washing up.

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

PANDORA WHAT THE HECK DONT DO THAT!!!! *takes book away from pandora rips it to shreds again and throws it into the bon fire*

Anonymous said...

Mondays= Chaotic

Ricardo Doom said...

G2g now cya guys


The epic battle of peanut hill



Commander Bamboo stood at the top of peanut hill and surveyed his surroundings. His commando Koalas had torn the rear end of the hedgehog battalion to pieces, but the hedgehog artillery was disturbingly accurate and had forced the Koalas to withdraw. Now the hedgehogs where slowly advancing, firing there poisoned spines as they came. He saw many brave Koalas die screaming in agony as the poison slowly rotted their bodies. To his horror he saw that the hedge hogs had breached the outer defences, he ordered some more men to the outer wall and said a silent prayer to the Koala god Brambo

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

*mutters something how 1984 is haunting her*

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

its an evil book i tell ya PURE EVIL!!!

Anonymous said...

Ahhhhh...
*Collapses in chair*
*Takes tylenol out of their little pockets, drops them into tea*

Anonymous said...

*Puts on Shiroi Kokoro*

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

DOWN WITH THE BLOODY RED QUEEN!!!

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

*realizes she is not in wonderland and turns a broght shade of red herself*

Octa said...

I can't find the message.

I've looked in my emails, clicked on your pic and my pic but no message.

When you get messages where do you see them?

Anonymous said...

*Shrieks*
*Her chair flies towards the ceiling*
NOT- NOW!
*Chair crashes through ceiling*
*CRASH*
*Sits upside down amidst a bunch of clutter in the attic, the chair unscatched*
*Lets out a slow breath*
*Falls out of chair*

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

sorry im going a little mad myself i hate tests they are really annoying and not good for your health

Anonymous said...

*Unscathed

*Falls with a thud on the ground*
*Stands up*
*Dusts self off*

Anonymous said...

*The doorbell rings*
*I peek through the window*
*Gnomes chatter angrily outside*
Oh... em...

Crescent said...

I Want A Fat Pony PLZ!

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

gnomeo and juliet now that is a strange movie

Anonymous said...

*Nervously hums L'espoir Mahou no Akai Ito, closes curtain to window*

Octa said...

I just sent myself a message and I recieved that.

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

the men in white coats are out to get me!

GenesisAggelos said...

Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaack. Who missed me?

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

they are very scary you know

Anonymous said...

*Gnomes burst in the front door of the dereklandyblogsville house*

Anonymous said...

I don't know if we've met before, Genesis... so hi :D I'm Pandora.

GenesisAggelos said...

Yay thankies Kallista :D What did I miss?

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

people tell me lies and thats not good......the government tells lies.......they're hiding something from us i know it.......it must be HUGEE something important that if they let word spread the world will implode or we would overthrow the man.....

Crescent said...

GIVE ME A FAT PONY, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!!!!! RAAAAGHGAAGHRRGHGHGH!!!!

Skyril A.K.A the Vociferous Chatterer, Loyal Forever and Always, The Ever-Present, the Pluviophile said...

~comes flying in on a giant, mechanical dragonfly~

How are my fine fellows here today?

:]

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

*ducks behind skyril* if i cant see the they cant see me!!

GenesisAggelos said...

Pandora - No I dont believe we have :) Im Genesis (obvs) and Im old :)

Skulgirl - You sound like a bad rerun of 1984. Whats with the paranoia?

Skyril A.K.A the Vociferous Chatterer, Loyal Forever and Always, The Ever-Present, the Pluviophile said...

Hello everybody!

Skulgirl13 A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous said...

Genesis have you read 1984 by Gorge Orwell???

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